If your husband had to choose between you and your kids

BlueLucario · Aug 5, 2008

I know that this is an extremely difficult question for the women to answer, and this may come off as offensive.

A note to the MODS: IF you find this post inappropriate, please let me know. And feel free to lock it.

Imagine you and your kids are in a burning building, and your husband had to choose between you and your kids. If he chose you, how would you feel? Would you still love him?

And if your husband chose you, what would that say about him?
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Thank you so much for taking the time to answer this question. And I hope I'm no bother.

Kitrianna · Aug 5, 2008

I already know where I stand. I'm number four on the list and it's just fine with me. He's at the same number with me. Kids come first.

jennifer75 · Aug 5, 2008

Who even THINKS that question, let alone ASK IT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Stew21 · Aug 5, 2008

Kids first. Even if he wanted to (which he wouldn't) I wouldn't let him save me. I cannot imagine any parent thinking otherwise, or any father that would not choose his children.

Ol' Fashioned Girl · Aug 5, 2008

We'd both die trying to get the kids out - of course, they're three cats and a dog...

jennifer75 · Aug 5, 2008

Kitrianna said:
I already know where I stand. I'm number four on the list and it's just fine with me. He's at the same number with me. Kids come first.

Who ANSWERS that question?!?!?

Just givin you a hard time.....

Mr Flibble · Aug 5, 2008

We've actually had this conversation ( due to some film we were watching where the guy tries to save his wife not his kids). He'd try and save me and kids, but if it came to a choice - he'd save the kids.

I agree.

If he saved me I'd be extremely angry. Extremely, unforgiveable biblically angry. It would say he was selfish, because he thought of his own needs before that of his children.

Kitrianna · Aug 5, 2008

Ol' Fashioned Girl said:
We'd both die trying to get the kids out - of course, they're three cats and a dog...

CaroGirl · Aug 5, 2008

Kids.

Why would I want to live if I were saved from the same fire that killed my kids?

Stew21 · Aug 5, 2008

Blue, do you understand that it would be completely unnatural for a father to choose his wife in this situation? It would take a hell of a lot of explaining to make that even a consideration. A parent doesn't make that choice. The kids ARE the choice.

Mr Flibble · Aug 5, 2008

CaroGirl said:
Kids.

Why would I want to live if I were saved from the same fire that killed my kids?

Exactly.

Cranky · Aug 5, 2008

Stew21 said:
Blue, do you understand that it would be completely unnatural for a father to choose his wife in this situation? It would take a hell of a lot of explaining to make that even a consideration. A parent doesn't make that choice. The kids ARE the choice.

Yes. Exactly.

quickWit · Aug 5, 2008

Which one's closer to the TV?

Carry on.

BlueLucario · Aug 5, 2008

Stew21 said:
Blue, do you understand that it would be completely unnatural for a father to choose his wife in this situation? It would take a hell of a lot of explaining to make that even a consideration. A parent doesn't make that choice. The kids ARE the choice.

I didn't know. I'm not married and I don't have kids.

I knew this was a bad question.

I saw this movie where this man chose his love, when both her and her kids are held hostage in different building with a bomb inside. His first choice was his wife, because he loves her too much for her to die. So I thought this is saying this is how much he loves his wife, not being selfish.

SpookyWriter · Aug 5, 2008

What about the mistress?

BlueLucario · Aug 5, 2008

CaroGirl said:
Kids.

Why would I want to live if I were saved from the same fire that killed my kids?

Ouch. Good Point

JLCwrites · Aug 5, 2008

Anyone want some bbq Turkey?

maestrowork · Aug 5, 2008

I'm not married and I don't have kids. But it's just human nature. We protect our young.

Also, as someone says, you may have different wives or husbands, but you only get one father or mother. How can one choose between someone who's not related to you vs. your own blood? And if you love your wife more than you love your kids, then something is not quite right, IMHO.

BlueLucario · Aug 5, 2008

IdiotsRUs said:
If he saved me I'd be extremely angry. Extremely, unforgiveable biblically angry. It would say he was selfish, because he thought of his own needs before that of his children.

That's selfish? I thought it's selfish if he left you both in a burning building. I thought this is telling you that he loves you.

Shadow_Ferret · Aug 5, 2008

*points* Ray isn't a married woman! Foul!

Me, as a married male with children, I'd save the children.

Wives are a dime a dozen. Your own progeny is harder to come by.

Especially since I've been spade or neutered.

Stew21 · Aug 5, 2008

BlueLucario said:
That's selfish? I thought it's selfish if he left you both in a burning building. I thought this is telling you that he loves you.

In this situation he can show his love one way.
His Love is this: he would save my children. He would love me enough to save them instead of me.

Mr Flibble · Aug 5, 2008

BlueLucario said:
That's selfish? I thought it's selfish if he left you both in a burning building. I thought this is telling you that he loves you.

He wouldn't leave - he'd save the kids or die trying. I wouldn't have married him otherwise. Denying our kids the chance of rescue for me would be selfish becasue he would be saving me for himself. Because as parents, the kids ALWAYS come first. No matter what. Non negotiable.

His Love is this: he would save my children. He would love me enough to save them instead of me.

Yup - because this would be selfless, not selfish.

Jersey Chick · Aug 5, 2008

I can't see my husband even having to think about this - kids first without a doubt. If he did save me first, he'd regret it because I'd kill him. And I'm not joking about that.

Red-Green · Aug 5, 2008

Kids, hell. I think my husband would save the cats before he saved me.

Jersey Chick · Aug 5, 2008

If we didn't have kids, the tv and cable box would probably come before me

If your husband had to choose between you and your kids

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