Why do women "hover"? (toilet tales, gross alert!)

[CaroGirl]

Subtitled: What are you afraid of?

There's a woman I work with (or maybe two) who, when she uses the toilet, does not actually sit on the seat when she pees, judging by the evidence left behind. Instead she "hovers" her lily-white arse at least an inch or two above it and appears to make circular hip motions to ensure the seat is fully covered in her lovely urine. She seems not to notice this and walks out without wiping it off.

Now, if I go into the toilet after Hover Woman (whoever she is) I'm treated to a bad case of wet butt unless I notice before I sit.

Why do women do this? How is it more hygienic for anyone?

 

[ChaosTitan]

Some of us hover and manage to hit keep it off the seat.

 

[StoryG27]

I thought everyone knew the golden rule of the restroom:
If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie.


I've hovered before if the bathroom is really gross 'cuz I don't want my nekkidness touching the uckiness, however, I do adhere to the above rule.

 

[jgold]

Ew. You are totally right.

I've worked in a bunch of different stores, and the women's restroom is ALWAYS grosser than the men's. Lots of women seem to be under the impression that sitting down equals other people's germs on their butts. At least the toilet gets bleached every day.

It's always the ones who are most worried about germs that make it unhygienic for the rest of us. Nasty.

 

[CaroGirl]

I thought everyone knew the golden rule of the restroom:
If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie.


I've hovered before if the bathroom is really gross 'cuz I don't want my nekkidness touching the uckiness, however, I do adhere to the above rule.

Well, sure, no one wants to get dirty from sitting on the seat. But this isn't a particularly public toilet. The only people who use it are my coworkers and it appears to be cleansed nightly.

But even so, you hoverers don't really believe you can get a disease from a toilet seat, right?

Nice poem, by the way.

 

[Cranky]

That's so gross.

I've never understood why people can't check the seat after they're done doing their business. I refer you to the rule SG quotes above.

*shudders*

 

[Shadow_Ferret]

Ick! Ick! I touched this thread!

*runs off to wash*

 

[ChaosTitan]

But even so, you hoverers don't really believe you can get a disease from a toilet seat, right?

No, I don't. I think I do, because my mother did. I was always told to either put down toilet paper before sitting, or to squat above. So I did and still do. Because you're right--there's nothing grosser than "wet butt" and spending the rest of the day knowing I sat on someone else's pee.

 

[Seaclusion2]

You sure you don't have a guy using this bathroom and not lifting the seat.

Richard

 

[melaniehoo]

I hover or sit depending on where I am. Bar/restaurant: hover. Friend's house/work: sit. I don't get the women who refuse to wipe the seat after themselves. It's like they think someone is going to clean it anyways, so why bother.

 

[maestrowork]

What is REALLY gross is when people hover while doing #2, and they MISS. Then they just leave it as is.

Yup, I've seen that in the men's room multiple times. It's truly disgusting.

* This thread is icky *

p.s. I thought this thread is about women who hover and yelp around your shoulders while you watch ESPN...

 

[Xyrventalagn]

Ugh, public/shared restrooms... The only one I've ever willingly used was the one at my last job, and that's only because it was a night shift job and I was almost guaranteed to have it to myself at any hour. I always hold it whenever I can, but I remember one comical experience I had in NYC:

I had just gotten off the train in Grand Central Terminal with a buddy of mine when we came to the conclusion that it might be wise to "freshen up" before venturing off into a city we knew little about. Deciding to bite the bullet rather than come upon a stomach ache whilst in a place like Chinatown, we headed downstairs to the public restroom and were amazed. First to grace our eyes were the two armed soldiers outside of the doorway--this alone nearly persuaded me to turn back, but I figured I would continue onwards. The next thing to greet me was an old, smelly bum holding a sign and cup just beyond the doorway. He wasn't there very long, however, as apparently the guards were there to escort him out.

Well, with all distractions gone, we made it into the primary room and thought for sure we had taken a wrong turn somewhere. With all of the people standing around chatting, I thought we might've stumbled into a restroom-themed club--people relaxing next to the urinals, lines building up outside of the "musical" stalls...I was surprised that no one was offering to dance. After that fiasco, I decided to drink and eat as little as possible for the rest of the trip.

Another trip: We were eating at a restaurant called "Houston's" in Manhattan and I again had to use the bathroom. This time, is was nice, tidy and small--but far from enough to save me from embarrassment. The guy in the urinal next to me finished just as I did, and so we both walked over to wash out hands at the same time. The sink was one of those knob-less ones--and a variety I had never used before. He starts the sink up before I do, and in my confusion I completely missed how he did it. So there I am, clapping, snapping and waving my hands next to the faucet and he's looking at me like I'm some sort of loony about to break into Jazz Hands. Luckily, his faucet kept running after he left and gave me a chance to take over. Ugh.

~X.

 

[Ol' Fashioned Girl]

We aim to please.

You aim, too, please!

 

[James81]

Instead she "hovers" her lily-white arse at least an inch or two above it and appears to make circular hip motions to ensure the seat is fully covered in her lovely urine.

The question on my mind is how you know this.

 

[MoonWriter]

We aim to please.

You aim, too, please!

OFG, you stole my line. There's a sign in the old shack where we launch our boat, "We aim to keep the bathroom clean, your aim will help." Funny thing, from the looks of the toilet, more than a few people took their eyes off the target while reading the sign.

James - don't know how a woman could leave a seat covered in urine if she wasn't hovering. And yeah, to cover the entire seat, I'd say she'd have to make at least one revolution. But I bet her quads are in awesome shape.

 

[JLCwrites]

Just throw some Cheerios into the toilet so she has something to aim at. (It works for preschool boys.)

 

[NeuroFizz]

It's a bad time to do those Kegels.

 

[joyce]

SICK ALERT**SICK ALERT**

The grocery store where I work had this lady come in last week and left a trail of poop from the Deli all the way to the bathroom. When the cleaning person had to come in and clean, there was poop all over the floor, walls, etc. etc. Evidently this woman did nothing to try and clean up any of her mess. Poop was everywhere! The poor guy cleaning up the mess was 17 and I felt so bad for him. He stated the men's bathroom never was as dirty as the womens. I as a woman have to agree. So many women using the restrooms are pigs! I can't help but wonder what do their bathrooms at home look like.

 

[CaroGirl]

SICK ALERT**SICK ALERT**

The grocery store where I work had this lady come in last week and left a trail of poop from the Deli all the way to the bathroom. When the cleaning person had to come in and clean, there was poop all over the floor, walls, etc. etc. Evidently this woman did nothing to try and clean up any of her mess. Poop was everywhere! The poor guy cleaning up the mess was 17 and I felt so bad for him. He stated the men's bathroom never was as dirty as the womens. I as a woman have to agree. So many women using the restrooms are pigs! I can't help but wonder what do their bathrooms at home look like.

How, in the name of all that is sterile, does THAT happen? Was the woman not wearing CLOTHES?

 

[joyce]

How, in the name of all that is sterile, does THAT happen? Was the woman not wearing CLOTHES?

According to the people in the deli, it was dripping out her pant legs, and was running like a free flowing brook as she calmly made her way to the bathroom. From their description, she was covered in it. The smell was horrible! I guess she was living the term "full of shit".

 

[Ageless Stranger]

Your mouth is filled with more germs than your arse.
Fact.

 

[nerds]

The thread title led me to think the question was about overweening, overbearing, whatcha doin' whatcha reading whatcha whatcha women.

As it is, lunch is now out of the question.

 

[BenPanced]

The thread title led me to think the question was about overweening, overbearing, whatcha doin' whatcha reading whatcha whatcha women.

As it is, lunch is now out of the question.

So I guess this means I get to tell some stories about the porno shop I used to work at?

Hey! Where ya goin'?

 

[Pagey's_Girl]

The thread title led me to think the question was about overweening, overbearing, whatcha doin' whatcha reading whatcha whatcha women.

As it is, lunch is now out of the question.

Yeah, I thought it was going to be a chance to vent about the coworker who's just sent three emails to my manager, copying me (he's in facilities, this is stuff she suddenly wants fixed) and any second now is going to be down here wondering why hasn't he called me do you know where he is where did he go what time did he leave did you get my emails can you tell him I sent him a bunch of emails are you gonna order me my stuff when it is gonna come in and oh did you check this place and that place and did you look up the street to see if they have it and when is it gonna be in and....

Sorry.

I have a couple of those type tales - one funny, one really, really gross. The funny one was one day when I was washing my hands at the bathroom sink when a toilet in the stall nearby flushed. I almost immediately heard "OH CRAP!" followed by a coworker grabbing my arm and pulling me with her, yelling "Look out, she's gonna blow!" We made it safely to the far side of the floor drain (so that's what that thing is for!) seconds before we were caught in the flood of the overflowing toilet. (The toilets in the bathroom clogged if you so much as looked at them funny. And yeah, actually, it was pretty funny.)

*WARNING - REALLY REALLY GROSS*
Once, where I used to work, I walked into the (very small - two stalls) women's room and found what looked like a murder scene - blood everywhere - all over the walls, the floor, the sink. I glimpsed a very well-used tampon in the middle of the floor as I fled to call Housekeeping.

 

[dpaterso]

According to the people in the deli, it was dripping out her pant legs, and was running like a free flowing brook as she calmly made her way to the bathroom. From their description, she was covered in it. The smell was horrible! I guess she was living the term "full of shit".

Either a bad dose of the runs, incontinence, or a leaking or overflowing bag. No fun for anyone.

-Derek