What is Love?

editing_for_authors
Editing for authors: because every writer needs a good editor.

Status
Not open for further replies.

kdnxdr

One of the most important people in the world
Poetry Book Collaborator
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Nov 11, 2005
Messages
7,900
Reaction score
842
Location
near to Dogwood Missouri
Website
steadydrip.blogspot.com
In the Bible, the scripture says : "God is love."

Given that formula, anything that has to do with love, by one degree or another, it has to do with God, something of God's essence.

There are many things that humans call or reference as to being love that fail as a representative of love. That doesn't mean that love fails or that God fails.
 

INTPwriter

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 16, 2010
Messages
50
Reaction score
1
Location
Oklahoma
It's both, isn't it? Noun usage: A mother's love for her child is a wonderful thing. Verb: I love you. See. It's both. It's like magic almost.

I agree with ScarletPeaches in that it is a verb and not a noun. I think that's why people have such a problem defining it because they try to associate with feelings. Feelings change, not only within ourselves, but from person to person. When a person says, "I know exactly how you feel," do they really? No. It's impossible to know exactly how someone feels. So, love as a feeling would vary so much between people that in the end, could it really still be considered "love"? If we say we love someone because of the butterflies and mushy stuff we feel, what is it when we wake up and have a bad day where those feelings aren't there? Do we still love that person? Not by the noun definition. I believe that's why so many people give up on a relationship. When that mushy feeling isn't there, they say they no longer love that person. The butterflies come and go when I'm with my wife. If I gave up on the relationship when I didn't feel all giddy inside, it would've been over a long time ago and thrown away a good relationship. But, there's no other person I'd rather be with because I want to love her and I've dedicated myself to loving her (a verb). If we love someone by the verb definition, it takes on a more realistic definition. We put action into it and not our ever-changing feelings.
 

Kent

learned my lesson well
Registered
Joined
Jul 23, 2010
Messages
42
Reaction score
4
Location
Illinois
I think it's Erich Segal who deserves the blame for writing the quixotic line, "Love means never having toa say you sorry."
 

Dana W

Sockpuppet
Banned
Joined
Sep 22, 2011
Messages
22
Reaction score
1
"Love" is a need within ourselves which we project onto others. We make them up. No wonder they disappoint us.
 

Dana W

Sockpuppet
Banned
Joined
Sep 22, 2011
Messages
22
Reaction score
1
... when another's needs are as important as ones own that's love.

Or it could also be a crutch for those who haven't learned the knack of being whole in and of themselves. Where does love end and dependency being?
 

TamaraLynne

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 5, 2012
Messages
140
Reaction score
9
Location
Michigan
This thread got me thinking and also had me diving within myself to see if I might possibly be a whole person on the inside. Not to mention as a child to be taken from my parents and placed within foster homes ...it gives a clear idea of unconditional love verses conditional in a family situation .

When I start to think about my marriage and if it sides more with unconditional verses conditional love and if the overall essence feels the same as it did when I was a child...to compare it to my definition of conditional verses unconditional.
I think and know we take delight it pleasing each other and the more I please my husband the more he wants to please me and sometimes things in life creep up that puts one or the other doing the trying to please part..this could be construed as conditional part of love. But is also a reaction that occurs in unconditional love.

It is the overall essence that surrounds us of feeling safe. That we are exactly where we are suppose to be. It is also the feeling that together you are going to create something wonderful...something not seen but felt. It is seeing the vulnerable,and the strength and the weakness and even the undesirable in someone and embracing all of it knowing that it mirrors our own comings and short comings.The person just fits. They make you feel that you have room to grow and be yourself.Not to mention that your sharing your thoughts and desires with someone and the sound of life is not an empty echo. This falls in the unconditional arena.

I can look back and shudder at someone who has broken my heart and eroded my trust and left me hurt ,cold,wounded,feelings of loneliness, where I had to pick myself up and survive. To wipe my tears from my heart so that I could see clearly.
Even though I might not like the person anymore who hurt me...I can still love them because I know what their vulnerable child heart encased in an adult body looks like. But I stay clear of them ...I can love them but not be in love with them..and I can do this from a distance.

Euphoric feelings are just chemicals released to make us feel in love...those chemicals fade...they don't entirely disappear :) they come and go within a relationship that swims in unconditional love.

So........I guess you could compare me to a broken vase that has been glued back together...I just hope some of the pieces have not been shattered beyond repair.

I guess its easier to know what love is by first knowing what the absence of love feels like.

Can we honestly be at a point in our life where we are whole..completely whole in and of ourselves? I think we can be happy with who we are because all our experiences define us...and we can stand tall and think we are molded just fine...but in the end we are all probably broken vases put back together in some way.

But just my thoughts.........
 

mr.biddly

I'm just a juggalo. I mean, gigolo.
Registered
Joined
Jul 17, 2012
Messages
8
Reaction score
0
Location
Beneath the clouds, mang.
For me, some of the most compelling thoughts about love were penned by Martin Buber in "I-Thou". When one enters into a relationship with another person -- whether the life long devotion of partnership or by passing a stranger on the street -- love is when "I" loses itself, fully or partially, in "Thou".
 

Chrissy

Bright and Early for the Daily Race
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 13, 2011
Messages
7,374
Reaction score
2,026
Location
Mad World
Wasn't that an Ayn Rand novella? They eliminated "I" from the language... for the sake of the community.... or something.

And now since this thread has been revived: I don't know what love is, exactly, but I know it's extremely difficult, if not impossible, to love someone else if you don't love yourself.
 

ColoradoGuy

I've seen worse.
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
6,674
Reaction score
1,481
Location
The City Different
Website
www.chrisjohnsonmd.com
You're comparing Ayn Rand to Martin Buber?? Do elaborate. I can't think of two persons with world views more opposite than those two.
 

Chrissy

Bright and Early for the Daily Race
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 13, 2011
Messages
7,374
Reaction score
2,026
Location
Mad World
I wasn't comparing them. When the previous poster mentioned the "I" losing itself, it triggered a memory of another novel.

And really, CG, your contempt for me isn't even thinly veiled at this point. Maybe we should break up. :D
 

ColoradoGuy

I've seen worse.
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
6,674
Reaction score
1,481
Location
The City Different
Website
www.chrisjohnsonmd.com
I wasn't comparing them. When the previous poster mentioned the "I" losing itself, it triggered a memory of another novel.

And really, CG, your contempt for me isn't even thinly veiled at this point. Maybe we should break up. :D

I respond to the words in front of me. You posted a comment that any reasonable reader would interpret as drawing a parallel between Martin Buber and Ayn Rand. I found such a comparison far-fetched. Now you reply that, against all appearances, you were not making such a comparison. Okay.

In the context of this forum, I respect everyone's religious views, as I expect they will mine.
 

Deepthought

Think hard, often
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 25, 2012
Messages
427
Reaction score
35
Location
N/A
Well, I am a Sufi Muslim, and the ultimate goal is to love God. God is close to us, but humans are not close to God. There are selfish reasons, ego, etc. that are in the way. A Muslim saint long ago said that even Paradise and Hell were veils in the way of the Beloved (God), and she didn't care about them. Love is to get closeer to the object of one's love. There is a lot of Sufi poetry on this kind of thing, like the works of Rumi.
As a side thing, I heard that the heart has many neurons and can think; not just the brain thinks. Something like that.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Featured Book