Old Fart's and Pouffes Bar, Grill, and Hogewey Infirmary

[Chase]

Mea culpa.

Our new hovel has better windows and insulation so is cheaper to heat this winter in our hemisphere. Wish we could send a bit of cool temps down to South Africa .

 

[GailD]

We got rain!!!

 

[Michael Myers]

I've got snow.
Hey Gail! How are the tomatoes doing?

 

[GailD]

I've got snow.
Hey Gail! How are the tomatoes doing?

Michael. The tomatoes are flourishing, flowering and making fruit. The Italian parsley, garlic chives, green peppers (capsicum) and mint are all growing like crazy. The one an only surviving cucumber plant is hanging in there but not doing much at all. I don't think it likes the climate or the soil or the plant food it gets... or something.

So, are y'all getting ready for spring? What are you planning for your garden?

 

[Michael Myers]

Waiting for the crocus to emerge.

 

[Chase]

I've heard from (seen from, actually) a couple of the old regulars now that they're staying home to hide from coronavirus.

Porter's daughter got him online again, so I know he's alive and well on Moose Creek and writing another thriller.

I'm in regular contact with JJ Pitts writing as Jeffrey A Pitts. He recently published Hitwoman, has sold Declan--a second book soon to be out--and is working on sequels.

Kay and I are staying home and not answering the door.

 

[Lavern08]

I wrote a long post about getting locked outta here, and how I tried and tried to find my way back, and how much I missed you guys, but don't know what happened to it, so....

Anyway, Mr. Hunny and I are doing OK - I'm taking every precaution (because of asthma) and I've been in the house for 3 weeks now.

I'll try to check in periodically - Hope everyone is well and staying safe.

 

[Chase]

Hi, Vernie! I'm glad you and your other hunny are okay. Kay says "Hay!"

Funny old poot's story in these strange times: Kay and I got carded at Costco this morning. They had a special early opening for members 65 and older, and lots of whippersnappers tried to horn in. Made us laugh. Thought we were long past being carded for anything.

 

[Michael Myers]

Hey Vernie!
Be safe Luv.

 

[Chase]

Save the date next April 1!

Mr. and Mrs. Admin wish to announce the engagement of their daughter, Lisa, to Chase.

Should the elderly groom-to-be survive the next 365 days, nuptials will take place next year on this date.

A honeymoon in the rec room of the Veterans Retirement Home in Lebanon, Oregon, is planned. Please reserve your wheelchair early.

 

[Michael Myers]

'splain

 

[Chase]

April fool overrule

Romance in the spring is quite cool,
When engagement announcements are rule.
Then came her insistence
For 500 feet social distance.
Too cruel was this sad April fool!

 

[GailD]

Everyone!

Good to see y'all!

We are in day 10 of a 21-day stay-at-home order (enforced by police and military). We are allowed to go to the supermarket and the pharmacy. Everything else is closed. What's funny is that it doesn't feel any different to me than normal. I mean, I work from home and, apart from restarting my counseling practice last year (2 days per week), I am normally at home all the time anyway. But I miss not being able to meet my friends for coffee occasionally.

Still, it will help keep us all so safe. So, stay safe. Stay at home.

 

[Chase]

Nice to hear from South Africa, Gail. You, me, Lavern, and Michael seem to be the only oldsters stirring here at the infirmary.

Our groceries and pharmacies are in the same two stores, which offer two days a week early shopping for seniors 65 and older. They card at entrances. Funny . . . I thought we were long past that.

 

[Michael Myers]

Hey Gail!

Back in Arizona for a while tending to some deferred maintenance at the "Winter Palace". Wife has been tending tomatoes in my absence. They are going absolutely gangbusters. Got two flats full and fully vine ripe. Very tasty.

All are healthy here. You stay healthy too, K?

 

[Bufty]

Thanks for your posts, guys. You all make me smile.

Yesterday I received an e-mail invitation from my 8 year-old- granddaughter to attend a Skype concert at 4pm.

We Skyped her at 4pm precisely and there she was, sitting on the edge of her bed, smiling and clutching her ukulele. She had combed her hair, put on her nicest dress and was wearing a tiara and a necklace.

We applauded.

"Hello Gran and Grandpa. I'm going to start with "I whistle a happy tune" from The King and I. You probably know it."

She sang it, accompanying herself on the ukulele. Nobody else spoke or appeared on the screen. It was lovely. She followed up with George Formby 'When I'm Cleaning Windows', plus a couple more and an encore.

We applauded and she curtsied. "Maybe we can have another concert next week," she said.

"We would love that."

She smiled 'Byeeeeeeeeeeeee Gran and Grandpa," and the screen went blank. Bless her.

She brightened up our day and her mother contacted us and told us it was all Emma's idea to help Gran and Grandpa not feel alone, and she was so pleased we had asked for an encore. She is really an accomplished ukulele player for her age.

So now we have a concert to look forward to.

Stay safe, all.

 

[Lavern08]

… We Skyped her at 4pm precisely and there she was, sitting on the edge of her bed, smiling and clutching her ukulele. She had combed her hair, put on her nicest dress and was wearing a tiara and a necklace.

"Hello Gran and Grandpa. I'm going to start with "I whistle a happy tune" from The King and I. You probably know it."

Aww, how sweet - That just made my day!

- Stay safe, Stay healthy, Stay inside, Everyone!

 

[Chase]

So we old guys are keeping our social distance from here in Oregon, Jeff in Washington state, Porter in Maine, Lavern in Virginia, Gail in South Africa, Bufty in Scotland, and Michael in some secret carpenter shop who know where.

Stay in touch, y'all

 

[porlock]

Hi, all. Haven't gone away, still taking care of wife after her strokes. She's especially vulnerable nowadays, I wear a mask when I go out. Not much writing these days, still an occasional poem. Everyone stay safe.

Tony (Porlock)

 

[Chase]

Nice to hear from friends deep in the heart of Texas. Kay and I will keep you and your wife in our thoughts and prayers. Yeah, a mask and gloves when you're out and take off at the door--maybe change out of your street clothes, too.

We do the same due to my diabetes. I'm on oral meds--no shots--but even a lighter case of type II puts me a greater risk.

We only go out for early shopping hours for seniors 65+ and then home again, home again, jiggity jig.

 

[Chase]

My homemade, home-improvement mask is from an internet design: it's a folded T-shirt sleeve with a replaceable coffee-filter sandwiched inside.

Problem is--after dozing off, I "wake up and smell the coffee." Maybe next time I swap filters, I'll go with a new one instead of shaking old grounds out of a used one.

 

[porlock]

I've got several regular masks left over from various jobs around here. Wore one in Walmart and no one accosted me or tried to rip it off. You can order on line and they'll come out to your car, but if you need prescriptions or over the counter stuff like decongestants (You gotta sign for it I guess they are afraid you're a meth dealer) you have to go inside. This caught everyone with their pants down (assuming you wear pants). Darn thing, every time I wear the mask my nose itches.

 

[GailD]

Great to see y'all here!

I usually complain a lot about our government but this time, I have to compliment them. They are really ahead of the curve here. Thanks to a early closure of our borders and a mandatory lockdown (that has been extended to April 30) we seem to be minimizing the spread - at least so far. There are no reported cases in our town (but we take extreme precautions anyway) and relatively few in our province (about 40 or so). But I'm not taking anything for granted.
The main pain in the butt isn't just gearing up to go the store, it's the whole decontamination process when you get home. You know, wash hands, remove mask, wash hands again because you touched the mask, sanitize every item you bought, wash hands again because touched all the shopping bags.... ugh.

Anyone got a pattern for a crocheted hazmat suit?

 

[Chase]

for you, Gail. If every government were as responsible, if every citizen took the time and measures you do to be safe, this serial killer virus would be dead or swiftly dying.

 

[porlock]

But, our freedoms! Well, sometimes we have to admit we can't always do anything we want to regardless of the consequences. Luckily, here in our little country town we're actually taking things seriously (despite having an overabundance of rednecks). Believe it or not, our mayor has a phD (that's not post hole digger).