The idiotic, unprofessional questionnaire is enough to send me running.
1. Contact information (your name, address, telephone number).
Fair enough, that's necessary information.
2. Tell us a little about yourself.
Er--why? Just read my book and see if it's something you can sell to our mutual benefit.
What are your motivations in life; your dreams and aspirations?
To make money selling books. Why do you want to know?
Have you written any other books?
Shouldn't that question be "Have you SOLD any other books or writing? Has another editor paid you money for your words?"
If you are a new author, please share with us when and why you started writing.
Why are you asking this? You should be reading my submission, not getting my life story.
3. Why have you written this book? This should be the easiest question to answer. If it isn't, maybe you should reconsider your next move.
I covered that in part two. Yes, you better believe I'm reconsidering my next move, ace.
4. A brief description of your book. It doesn't have to be very long; just give us an idea of what it's about.
Fair enough. This should have been your second question.
Please also tell us if your book is complete and, if not, the expected completion date.
If the book's not finished, then I shouldn't be trying to shop it and you should mention that in your guidelines.
5. Who is your target audience and what genre(s) do you feel your book fits into and why?
Fair enough.
6. How does your book differ from the works of similar writers and what makes it stand out? What known authors would you compare your writing style to and why?
Fair enough, but that's in my query / cover letter.
7. Marketing is very important. Please tell us, honestly, what efforts you will make to self-promote your book and yourself as an author.
Fair enough. What will you do?
8. Please include a brief one page outline of your book.
Fine, here it is.
If this seems too difficult, again, perhaps you should reconsider this whole writing thing.
If you're going to imply ("seems too difficult") that I'm some kind of idiot, then I am absolutely reconsidering, not writing, but submissions to your business. Your level of professionalism is underwhelming. Sheesh.
9. Please answer one, or more, of the following questions:
Who is your favorite Beatle and why?
What is a fardel and do you have any?
When was the last time you spoke to a stranger?
Where would you rather be right now?
How would you get there? (Please see previous question.)
Why are you the person you are today?
Have you somehow mistaken this questionnaire for a time-suck Facebook wall post?
Publishing is a business and your only concerns are:
A) Is a book good enough to publish and sell?
and
B) There is no "B." "A" covers everything.
Anyway, your FAQ page has a singular lack of information on payment to authors. Most small presses are up front about the percentages, which is more than one would expect from a "big" house, but less than a writer can get by going indie. How much do you pay, when are the checks cut, and what do YOU offer that makes you a better choice than going indie or subbing to a commercial house that pays an advance?
from me:
