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Gentlemen, I am happy to report

editing_for_authors
Editing for authors: because every writer needs a good editor.

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weightlifter316

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that my good friend's book is finally being published. Despite all the terrible things we heard far and wide across the Internets, he decided to accept a contract with AEG and Strategic Book Mark. It's a steal - only $995 for the first copy! I think he went ahead and paid them cash so they would throw in the book signing tour and the 'Grande', which is their all out advertising campaign.

Now I know what you're thinking "They said the same thing to us!" "It'll never work!" Well, my friends - this is no ordinary book. My friend is well read, having sampled many of Stephen Hawkins' works. He will take what he's learned from this and other disciplines, then compare and contrast what the Bible has to say about such theories, also including Einstein's Theory of Relativity and The Big Bang. Truly a fascinating read. Also included are what we believe to be factual evidence that Christ walked with dinosaurs, an expose' on the seedier profit-driven side of science, and finally the one true way to Salvation. You will not be able to put this puppy down. And at only 272 pages, you'll be able to read through it in a single night. Once he lets me know the title and cover art, I'll post that too!
 

Wayne K

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Is this hyperbole or are you fishing for an argument?

Its so hard to tell these days
 

Bartholomew

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DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!

The mighty drumming echoed up from the mines of Moria.

"Orcs!" cried Legolas. But he did not know the full of it, for as soon as he turned, bow and arrow locked, the door splintered in. He loosed his shaft, but for naught. The troll leading the host of orcs caught it, and snapped it like kindling.

Will the fellowship make it out of the mines alive? Is Frodo irrevocably corrupted by the power of the One Ring? Find out next week, same Hobbit-time, same Hobbit-station!
 
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Paul

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that my good friend's book is finally being published. Despite all the terrible things we heard far and wide across the Internets, he decided to accept a contract with AEG and Strategic Book Mark. It's a steal - only $995 for the first copy! I think he went ahead and paid them cash so they would throw in the book signing tour and the 'Grande', which is their all out advertising campaign.

Now I know what you're thinking "They said the same thing to us!" "It'll never work!" Well, my friends - this is no ordinary book. My friend is well read, having sampled many of Stephen Hawkins' works. He will take what he's learned from this and other disciplines, then compare and contrast what the Bible has to say about such theories, also including Einstein's Theory of Relativity and The Big Bang. Truly a fascinating read. Also included are what we believe to be factual evidence that Christ walked with dinosaurs, an expose' on the seedier profit-driven side of science, and finally the one true way to Salvation. You will not be able to put this puppy down. And at only 272 pages, you'll be able to read through it in a single night. Once he lets me know the title and cover art, I'll post that too!



:ROFL:

you guys....


re; embolden bit - i doubt it...;)
 

Monkey

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How ground breaking. A pay-for-play book about how science is all wrong and Christianity is the one true way? Yes, I'm sure that's never been done before.

But...I mean, you're joking, right?

Right?
 

Paul

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that my good friend's book is finally being published. Despite all the terrible things we heard far and wide across the Internets, he decided to accept a contract with AEG and Strategic Book Mark. It's a steal - only $995 for the first copy! I think he went ahead and paid them cash so they would throw in the book signing tour and the 'Grande', which is their all out advertising campaign.

Now I know what you're thinking "They said the same thing to us!" "It'll never work!" Well, my friends - this is no ordinary book. My friend is well read, having sampled many of Stephen Hawkins' works. He will take what he's learned from this and other disciplines, then compare and contrast what the Bible has to say about such theories, also including Einstein's Theory of Relativity and The Big Bang. Truly a fascinating read. Also included are what we believe to be factual evidence that Christ walked with dinosaurs, an expose' on the seedier profit-driven side of science, and finally the one true way to Salvation. You will not be able to put this puppy down. And at only 272 pages, you'll be able to read through it in a single night. Once he lets me know the title and cover art, I'll post that too!

Hey - you sure that wasn't Fred Flintstone?


If this isn't a joke, the human mind is even scarier than I thought it was.
 

poetinahat

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"Stephen Hawkins"? Didn't he play for the Sixers back when Dr. J was around?

"You will not be able to put this puppy down" - well, that's why my friend quit his job at the animal shelter. At $995 for 272 pages, or nearly four bucks a page, unless it's printed on two-dollar bills, I won't be picking this puppy up anyway.
 
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M.R.J. Le Blanc

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I don't know whether this is sarcasm or trolling, but OP you said you'd come back. Don't be a liar and back out of it.
 

JulieHowe

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that my good friend's book is finally being published. Despite all the terrible things we heard far and wide across the Internets, he decided to accept a contract with AEG and Strategic Book Mark. It's a steal - only $995 for the first copy! I think he went ahead and paid them cash so they would throw in the book signing tour and the 'Grande', which is their all out advertising campaign.

Now I know what you're thinking "They said the same thing to us!" "It'll never work!" Well, my friends - this is no ordinary book. My friend is well read, having sampled many of Stephen Hawkins' works. He will take what he's learned from this and other disciplines, then compare and contrast what the Bible has to say about such theories, also including Einstein's Theory of Relativity and The Big Bang. Truly a fascinating read. Also included are what we believe to be factual evidence that Christ walked with dinosaurs, an expose' on the seedier profit-driven side of science, and finally the one true way to Salvation. You will not be able to put this puppy down. And at only 272 pages, you'll be able to read through it in a single night. Once he lets me know the title and cover art, I'll post that too!

The use of the word internets tells me this is an old-time crank from way back in the days of the dial-up BBS, and this is not meant to be a serious post. PM me with your old BBS handle (username) if you really are an old-timer, and we can cry in our beer about the good old days, when real men had email addresses that ended with @compuserve.com.
 

weightlifter316

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The use of the word internets tells me this is an old-time crank from way back in the days of the dial-up BBS, and this is not meant to be a serious post. PM me with your old BBS handle (username) if you really are an old-timer, and we can cry in our beer about the good old days, when real men had email addresses that ended with @compuserve.com.

No, it's just a bad habit, like saying Walmarts, or Kmarts. I'm new here, and wanted to share the joy of having assisted in the completion of this harrowing task. I hope that every reader is enlightened and entertained.
 

Little1

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oh dear. The mind she boggles some times...
 

thewakingself

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I'm new here, and wanted to share the joy of having assisted in the completion of this harrowing task. I hope that every reader is enlightened and entertained.

But I'm not a gentleman--I'm a lady! Surely this doesn't mean I'm excluded from the enlightenment, does it? Because I can't wait to see how you tackle humans living alongside velociraptors and other such carnivorous megafauna.

Best of luck to you and your friend! Also: :welcome:

::cough:: troll ::cough::
 
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thothguard51

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James D. Macdonald

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What do werewolves or vampires have to do with anything?

Regardless of whether it's your book or your friend's book, save the receipts and other records. You'll want to bookmark the Florida Attorney General's page.
 

poetinahat

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"Now I know what you're thinking <note lack of punctuation mark here> 'They said the same thing to us!' <etc.>"

"well read, having sampled many of Stephen Hawkins' books" -- most well-read people would've read the entire books, not just 'sampled' them. And, um, I imagine you mean Stephen Hawking or, as Homer Simpson calls him, 'that wheelchair guy'.

"Internets" -- is slang really appropriate if you're trying to establish any sort of credibility here?

"$995" (seriously, for 272 pages by someone who isn't Isaac Newton, or do you mean $9.95?)

"my good friend's book"... "what we believe" ... "my book is well researched" -- Well, which is it? C'mon, Sybil, you can tell us...

"what the Bible has to say about such theories, including Einstein's Theory of Relativity" -- because, y'know, Jesus walked with Einstein and the dinosaurs. And they walked into a bar...

Hmmm.

Boy, if I were posting an announcement about a new book I've written (or am about to write; from the post, I still can't figure out which), I'd want to do a very thorough job of proofreading for punctuation and factual consistency. This doesn't give me any sort of hope for the book itself.

Given the author (you, your 'good friend', or whoever) is still unknown, that thousand bucks (give or take a cup of coffee) doesn't sound like a bargain. The marketing hasn't grabbed me.

And your friend paid for this book to be published? Yeah, I'd keep the receipts.
 
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CACTUSWENDY

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Hey Wayne....scoot over and share.....:popcorn:
 
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Elizabeth George's book Write Away