FY23 Writing Practice - Dialogue - Inner Monologue

InkFinger

InkFinger

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Something we get in books that we don't really get in movies is the inner life of our characters. I'm about to disprove that, but the point remains. Inner monologues have a special place in fiction. We get to see what's going on in the minds of our characters; if you're Frank Herbert, all of them. Whether you're telling us why you've fallen in love with a sparkly vampire or plan to murder your mother, an internal dialogue brings us along for the ride.

Tell us how you use inner monolouges.
 
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lorna_w

lorna_w

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I usually do third person close, and it just ... happens. Lol. I know that's not useful. You know, some things with writing, I had to study and think about to learn, and some came naturally. (oh, if only it 100% had!) I wrote some first person last year. Here's an excerpt:

"Are you flirting with him?"
“Just being friendly.”
“Mmm-hmm,” she said. Translation: bullshit.
“There isn’t much to do right now. I don’t even have my phone any more. So I’m talking to pass the time.” I clamped my mouth shut before I defended myself too much.
Wait, was I flirting? I thought I had forgotten how. It had been almost five years since I’d slept with a man. I couldn't risk having them know about the work I did, and one night stands don't do it for me. I imagine for some people, that’s better sex. You don’t know the person, so you can ask for or be anything, and maybe that makes it more raw and dirty and uninhibited for them. Nothing to lose. But not so for me. I needed to trust someone to open up to them in bed. Otherwise, I had a hard time asking for what I wanted or doing what I wanted. Too much to lose.
Click to expand...

But if I had written that in third person, not many words beyond the pronouns would have changed.
 
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