Flash Fiction: Darkness and Light

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phantasy

I write weird stories.
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Hi all. I've never written one of these before, I thought I'd give it a try. Thanks.

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Darkness and Light sat on a wall, swinging their legs and observing the world.


Darkness said to Light: It is unfair. Humanity curses me and warn their children of me. But I am not inherently evil. I merely hide what is already present, such as the deep holes a human may fall into.

Light responded: I am no better. Because in my presence humanity sees, and finds the holes they seek. Some wish to reside in these holes, while others wish to toss others into them.

And Darkness felt better and brightened.
 

jaus tail

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It's late night and I am about to sleep. This piece gave me some food for thought. I liked Light's reply as to how humans use light to bring pain others.

But I didn't understand Darkness' statement of:
"I merely hide what is already present, such as the deep holes a human may fall into. "

I didn't understand this. A hole is already present. Unless you're saying it's night and the street light isn't functioning and thus a human may fall into the hole. At first I thought you're saying that there's a pot hole and a human falls in it during day time.

Maybe make the dialogue of darkness clearer. Just my opinion.
Otherwise it was a good story.
 

ivylass

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I think you should write the dialogue as actual dialogue, as in, Darkness said, "It is unfair. Humanity curses me and warn their children of me. But I am not inherently evil. I merely hide what is already present, such as the deep holes a human may fall into" with Light responding.

I think you can get away with Dark instead of Darkness, since you're using Light instead of Lightness.

I liked Light's response. Dark's statement just needs a bit of work, such as making unseen was is normally seen, a metaphor that dark camouflages what already exists.
 

Gunpowder Nash

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I'd add something like
Darkness and Light met twice a day, waiting for the other to take over
Light might add
Darkness brings people close together, warm in their comforts of home
Light scatters people about, adrift on their own adventures