Now I'm not so sure they're all that pretty, but you know, a mothers love...
I guess I could just stick them here right?
Oh, and look I came back and edited them in. I have no shame and no self respect. sigh.
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The bar was new but it had already changed hands a few times, they were rough hands, the kind that always leave their mark on young new things. love this The current owner was trying for a better not sure about this, maybe a different word choice or , or leave out better-hmm-i warned you i wasn't firing right- more sophisticated clientele. One more fitting than those who had been so liberal with wanton disregard for things which did not belong to them. i like where your going with this, but i think it's an incomplete sentence?
The battered mahogany bar top had been given had been given=passive construct= a thorough scrubbing to smooth and ease out the deeper scars. A fresh coat of stain and high gloss finish aimed at lending an air of fashionable edgy character but only served as a frozen witness to darker times. A fresh coat of stain and high gloss finish meant to add an edgy character, but only served as a frozen withness to darker times. Love the last part of this sentence, but I'm not sure about the aimed at lending-
Dang girl, this could be freaking brilliant and I wouldn't know it right now. I'm going to stop hacking your work 'cause I'm batty eyed. My impression is that you've used too many words in your description, and usually I could tell you why I think that, but not tonight. Toast, call me toast.
The presentation, expertly designed to give the posh crowd a sense of rough urban danger and an easy assurance of absolute safety was awash in sincere lies. Synthetically aged leathers covered the booths and barstools while manufactured biker gang jackets clung menacingly to freshly antiqued walls. Hubcaps and hood ornaments that had never seen the open road boasted grease and dirt faithfully shellacked into place and precision lighting highlighted it all to its best advantage. The illusion was complete and it almost worked—if you didn’t look to close.