Just a quick question... - announcer, herald, master of ceremonies, booming voice??

darrtwish said:

"Vion Cralast," the voice announced.
"Vion Dalal."

Click to expand...

Of course I know zilch about contemporary royalty but I don't understand what VION has to do with royalty. I'm not familiar with that term.
Linnea

Sounds fine to me. Make it clear that someone unknown is announcing. Maybe have the narrator question where that person is?

I would do this:

A booming voice echoed across the stone walls, seeming to come from everywhere at once:
"Vion Cralast.
"Vion Dala.
"Vion Hoodeyhatta.
"Vion Slappacok."
The voice rose higher in pitch as he announced the last one.
"VION AMALAKADO!"


Something like that, at least. I'd probably give a little tidbit about each Vion coming down the stairs to break it up and give meaning to the names.

I don't think you necessarily need a new line for each new name. How about something like:

"Vion Cralast." There was a brief pause while the next grand figure made her entrance. "Vion Dala. Vion Whoever. Vion Thingy." The list seemed to go on forever.

Good point, girlyswot. Sometimes the new paragraph just gives more focus to each individual name (if they're important) . . . I notice that I will skim when a series of names is listed in a book all in the same paragraph.

That's just me, though.

It also depends on what viewpoint it's in. If it's third, then it's the character's perspective. If it's omni, it can show what the overall narrator sees.