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Karal
04-01-2008, 08:50 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 08:51 PM
I'm here for the sausage.

III
04-01-2008, 08:53 PM
your a worthwhile hole

Perks
04-01-2008, 08:53 PM
A place for goofy people to congregate? You're not as dim as you could be!

drachin8
04-01-2008, 08:54 PM
I originally came here for the sausage as well, but Cranky stole it all. Now I am just hoping for some burgers...


:(

-Michelle

Salem
04-01-2008, 08:55 PM
Did someone ask for burgers?

Cranky
04-01-2008, 08:55 PM
I originally came here for the sausage as well, but Cranky stole it all. Now I am just hoping for some burgers...


:(

-Michelle

I ate those, too. Ground 'em up into a protein shake. What?

A guy's gotta eat, you know.

dolores haze
04-01-2008, 08:56 PM
I'm here for the jiggling titties.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 08:58 PM
Did someone ask for burgers?

Yeah, but it looks like Cranky ate those, too. Next, he'll be going after the jiggling titties...then what will we be left with???


:(

-Michelle

Salem
04-01-2008, 08:59 PM
( o ) ( o )

III
04-01-2008, 08:59 PM
yes, preparation h feels good, on the hole

dolores haze
04-01-2008, 09:00 PM
Non-jiggling titties, apparently.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:00 PM
Yeah, but it looks like Cranky ate those, too. Next, he'll be going after the jiggling titties...then what will we be left with???


:(

-Michelle

Join my harem, and there will be a cornicopia of delights for you to enjoy, my dear.

Salem
04-01-2008, 09:01 PM
Non-jiggling titties, apparently.

Sorry, dol, it's the best I can do with my lack of computer skills.

dolores haze
04-01-2008, 09:02 PM
( o ) ( o )

OK. I'll settle for swaying titties.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:02 PM
I'm here for the scrum-diddly-icious man titty, myself...

Shadow_Ferret
04-01-2008, 09:03 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.
Didn't realize this site was so confusing. There's a map over on the wall there. See the "You are here?" It's pointing to the Coffee Break area, which is where you are now. Just follow the path up and out and you'll find all the Writer related stuff, like Writer Studios. The doors are all plainly marked.

If you're so bothered by stuff that "muddies the water" then just stay out of Coffee Break.

Sheesh. Newbies.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:04 PM
Oh yeah, baby. *flex*

*pats couch*

There's still room in my harem, Jersey. Come and feel the love.

Or eat sausages and hamburgers. Whatever's on the grill.

Salem
04-01-2008, 09:04 PM
If you're so bothered by stuff that "muddies the water" then just stay out of Coffee Break.

Sheesh. Newbies.

But that would be all too simple. Some people obviously just want something to gripe about.

CatSlave
04-01-2008, 09:05 PM
May I recommend the PublishAmerica forum.
It will really get your panties in a bunch.

Little Red Barn
04-01-2008, 09:05 PM
I came here for the blow-pop sucker heads! I'm sure we can get you one too, just sayn :D

Don Allen
04-01-2008, 09:07 PM
Hey Cranky, is that a sausage in your picture or do you have a horribly deformed nipple, either way it looks awfully tasty..

Soccer Mom
04-01-2008, 09:08 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.


Why don't we get rid of the crap? How about we start with you? People like you have no reason for logging on in the first place. I've been watching you and you are thisclose to getting banned, buddy.

You can take your sorry card avatar someplace else where they appreciate your loser brand of garbage that you pretend is "art."

Spare me the drama and just flounce for good.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:09 PM
Oh yeah, baby. *flex*

*pats couch*

There's still room in my harem, Jersey. Come and feel the love.

Or eat sausages and hamburgers. Whatever's on the grill.
Can I do both? I'm one hell of a multi-tasker!

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:09 PM
You tell 'em, OFG. Why on Earth people feel the need to speak their minds about a place is beyond me? I mean, do I walk into your house and start telling you the furniture sucks?

ChunkyMacbirol
04-01-2008, 09:09 PM
Ooooo...this thread looks fun!

Don Allen
04-01-2008, 09:09 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.


If all you have to do is sit on your duff for two days trying to figure out what this place is for I suggest you are a perfect fit except that you need to stop questioning things, it gets in the way of what we're trying to accomplish.

Soccer Mom
04-01-2008, 09:10 PM
Thanks, Shwebb. I agree, I've had enough of Noob trolls lately. I'm on a search and destroy mission.

You hear that Karal? That's right. Leave now before we boot your backside.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2008, 09:11 PM
They crawl out on special holidays, don't they?

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:11 PM
I do that all the time. And no one ever says thank you for the improvements! ;)

ETA: this was in response to the post about coming into someone else's house - everyone's either too fast, or I'm too slow today! :D

III
04-01-2008, 09:11 PM
You tell 'em, OFG. Why on Earth people feel the need to speak their minds about a place is beyond me? I mean, do I walk into your house and start telling you the furniture sucks?

or make love to you're picknick table?

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:11 PM
Thanks, Shwebb. I agree, I've had enough of Noob trolls lately. I'm on a search and destroy mission.


Where's mscelina when we need her?

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:11 PM
Can I do both? I'm one hell of a multi-tasker!

You can do whatever you want. *leers*

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:12 PM
Bwahahaha....

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:12 PM
Join my harem, and there will be a cornicopia of delights for you to enjoy, my dear.

Does the cornucopia include buns? I like my sausage and burgers with buns...toasted buns.


:)

-Michelle

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:12 PM
or make love to you're picknick table?

It was one time!!!!


:rant:

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:13 PM
Hey Cranky, is that a sausage in your picture or do you have a horribly deformed nipple, either way it looks awfully tasty..

Join my harem, and you can find out. Mwahahahahaha!

Soccer Mom
04-01-2008, 09:13 PM
She's comfy in Fang Relief, but when Soccer logs on, I'm sure she'll go grab her pal and come out to torment the pinata troll, if we haven't managed to chase her off. Plus she'll post some stupid cat picture or something.

Stew21
04-01-2008, 09:13 PM
Let Haggis chew this troll up!

HAGGIS! Fresh MEAT!

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:13 PM
Does the cornucopia include buns? I like my sausage and burgers with buns...toasted buns.


:)

-Michelle

Yup. It's a MAGIC cornucopia.

Fingers
04-01-2008, 09:14 PM
I will thank you to leave my moobs out of this please.
(heheheh at least I dont have an avatar)

Slinking off to hide where I will be least expected. No, dont bother looking in SYW.


yer pal Brian

Karal
04-01-2008, 09:16 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.

Little Red Barn
04-01-2008, 09:17 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.
William?

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:17 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.

What would you think of us if we defied your expectations?

Don Allen
04-01-2008, 09:17 PM
Join my harem, and you can find out. Mwahahahahaha!


EEEEGAAADDDDSSS Sausage will never be the same....

III
04-01-2008, 09:17 PM
great, now we have Fingers in the worthless hole

nerds
04-01-2008, 09:17 PM
Here's the top-secret Mod Mission Control Room.

http://www.thespacereview.com/archive/802a.jpg



Notice how they all look alike and you can't tell who is who today. Really quite sinister.

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44145000/jpg/_44145762_apollo13_nasa_416.jpg

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:18 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.


You mad because I didn't ask you to join my harem, too? Don't be mad, schweetheart.

There's plenty of me to go around. *wink*

dolores haze
04-01-2008, 09:18 PM
Let Haggis chew this troll up!

HAGGIS! Fresh MEAT!


Nearly 10, 000 posts and you still don't know how to summon the Haggis?

Yeesh.

Hey, Haggis! JIGGLING TITTIES IN THE HOLE THREAD!

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:19 PM
nerds! How did you get those pictures?

Ban her!!!

Stew21
04-01-2008, 09:19 PM
usually I just yell "BEER! Fetch!"

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:20 PM
Yup. It's a MAGIC cornucopia.

Great, I'm in! Can't resist sausage between toasty buns. Mmmmmm....

Hope you don't mind me assassinating your other harem girls. They don't deserve the sausage like I do...


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:20 PM
You mad because I didn't ask you to join my harem, too? Don't be mad, schweetheart.

There's plenty of me to go around. *wink*

He is The Game, after all.

Soccer Mom
04-01-2008, 09:21 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.

You wouldn't know creative if it bit your candy ass. Honestly, what makes you think you can come in here, rip off some heads and poo down the holes?

I know you. You've been hear before, haven't you. You're a repeat troll. Spare us the trouble of hunting you down for extermination. It isn't an insult, it's the truth. I'm still waiting for a good flounce by all I get is a week whine.

Sorry, I've seen and heard better. I'll I've done better flounces in my time. People like you make me want to leave and never come back.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:23 PM
He is The Game, after all.

Yeah. In this case, you gotta love the player AND The Game.

Oh yeah.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:24 PM
Well that goes without sayin'

just sayin'

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:24 PM
Great, I'm in! Can't resist sausage between toasty buns. Mmmmmm....

Hope you don't mind me assassinating your other harem girls. They don't deserve the sausage like I do...


:)

-Michelle

Now, now. There's no need for bloodshed. Look at my pecs! You're feeling very, very sleepy...

And inexplicably hungry.

III
04-01-2008, 09:24 PM
you tell her old fartin girl!

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:25 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.

What does this post have to do with sausages?


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:26 PM
Someone's looking for a sausage-smackdown, perhaps

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:27 PM
GET A LIFE. IT'S A MESSAGE BOARD.


Take it back! Take it back right now!

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:27 PM
Must've stepped on a nerve, eh? Pathetic.

Half of you think it's a joke and the other half are sputtering mad! Sheesh, people: GET A LIFE. IT'S A MESSAGE BOARD.


The Game is confused.

*wanders away to eat more sausage*

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:27 PM
Now, now. There's no need for bloodshed. Look at my pecs! You're feeling very, very sleepy...

And inexplicably hungry.

I think my hunger is quite explicable. Hadn't you noticed the giant sausage on your man teat? How can you expect to walk around with that and not cause bloodshed?


:)

-Michelle

III
04-01-2008, 09:28 PM
Someone's looking for a sausage-smackdown, perhaps

Will an AW historian please note JC's post as the true origin of the "Cranky's Sausage Smackdown" thread which will undoubtedly become the trendy new hangout of 2008.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:28 PM
I think my hunger is quite explicable. Hadn't you noticed the giant sausage on your man teat? How can you expect to walk around with that and not cause bloodshed?


:)

-Michelle

Sorry. My mistake. Chow down. :D

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:28 PM
Someone's looking for a sausage-smackdown, perhaps

I pray every day for a sausage smackdown...


:)

-Michelle

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2008, 09:29 PM
It's a troll, people! Let it die and it'll go away.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:29 PM
Will an AW historian please note JC's post as the true origin of the "Cranky's Sausage Smackdown" thread which will undoubtedly become the trendy new hangout of 2008.

The Sausage Smackdown thread! I LOVE it!

That one might need to be password protected, though... hmm...

nerds
04-01-2008, 09:30 PM
nerds! How did you get those pictures?

Ban her!!!


heh heh heh . . . only The Shadow knows.

:hat:

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:30 PM
Will an AW historian please note JC's post as the true origin of the "Cranky's Sausage Smackdown" thread which will undoubtedly become the trendy new hangout of 2008.

That's right, baby.

Oh.

Does this mean I have to KEEP this avatar????

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:30 PM
heh heh heh . . . only The Shadow knows.

:hat:

*runs off to hunt down this "Shadow" person*


ETA: It's Shadow Ferret! It must be.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:31 PM
It's a troll, people! Let it die and it'll go away.

I'm not sure what this post has to do with sausage either. Perhaps you should find a thread about trolls and play there, although I am not sure where you might find such a thing on the Absolute Sausage forums. Try Office Party.


:)

-Michelle

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-01-2008, 09:32 PM
Can we make 'Troll Sausage'? Or would it be too greasy?

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:33 PM
Can we make 'Troll Sausage'? Or would it be too greasy?


Nah. We just have to add extra spices. Otherwise...it's kinda bland.

choppersmom
04-01-2008, 09:33 PM
My hole wants kielbasa.

ChaosTitan
04-01-2008, 09:33 PM
Can we make 'Troll Sausage'? Or would it be too greasy?

I'm thinking it'd be rather green and smell like onions.

Or is that Ogre Sausage?

shakeysix
04-01-2008, 09:34 PM
so why not post something on syw k.kard sensitive artist person? i fer one would like to see where your mouth is---s6 ps--pretty near yer hole i'd guess

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:35 PM
Can we make 'Troll Sausage'? Or would it be too greasy?

The problem with Troll Sausage is that each little ground up bit regenerates into a new troll. That wreaks havoc on the digestive system!

Stick with regular sausages (or extra juicy man-teat sausages like Cranky's). Trust me.


:)

-Michelle

Don Allen
04-01-2008, 09:36 PM
Just about what I expected: vicious defense of your playground coupled with insults. Very creative.

So Karal, what would you have us do "Seek the patronage of some great man"? Should we be searching for the meaning of life in each utterence we etch upon our screens. You seem to have all the answers, but one, This is a place for people who express themselves by the art of the word. A place to inform as well as be informed, a place where people with the same goals and understanding of the art can let down their hair and speak freely of the issues that confront them in all aspects of their lives. Non-writers which you certainly must be - don't understand that those of us (published or not) who strive to improve the great works on which we have embarked need an outlet to vent, and otherwise find kinship with likeminded individuals.. VERY CREATIVE people understand and nurture this need, and are VERY GRATEFUL for the exsistence of such a place.... Come back when you understand...

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:36 PM
Can we make 'Troll Sausage'? Or would it be too greasy?

I think Troll Sausage would give you a nasty case of upset tummy and maybe some serious intestinal distress.

it'd cause distress for everyone on the outside then, as well...

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:36 PM
My hole wants kielbasa.

You should join Cranky's harem then. But be warned, I'll assassinate you the first chance I get!


:)

-Michelle

nerds
04-01-2008, 09:37 PM
The problem with Troll Sausage is that each little ground up bit regenerates into a new troll.


Hence causing Mad Troll Disease.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:38 PM
Yes, choppersmom. Join with me.

I have sausages and a MAGIC cornucopia.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:39 PM
Hence causing Mad Troll Disease.

Isn't that the only troll disease there is?


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:39 PM
Hence causing Mad Troll Disease.

Which, sadly enough, there is no cure for.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 09:41 PM
I think it left. Must have been the smell of heat-seared sausage...

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:42 PM
I think it left. Must have been the smell of heat-seared sausage...


My work here is done.

Come with me, ladies -- to the harem!

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:43 PM
My work here is done.

Come with me, ladies -- to the harem!


**giggles**

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:43 PM
**giggles**


That's right, sugarbritches.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:44 PM
:e2thud:


that's me, swooning

Gravity
04-01-2008, 09:48 PM
:e2thud:


that's me, swooning

Me too, Long-Nip. You need backup to handle all dis?

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:49 PM
Me too, Long-Nip. You need backup to handle all dis?


Hmmm. I could use a second in command. Sure.

Karal
04-01-2008, 09:51 PM
I think it left. Must have been the smell of heat-seared sausage...

No, it's still here. You people are amusing, at least.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:52 PM
No, it's still here. You people are amusing, at least.

You do know it's April Fool's Day, yes?

Geesh.

Lighten up.

William Haskins
04-01-2008, 09:53 PM
I've seen nothing amusing thus far.

Karal
04-01-2008, 09:53 PM
Yeah, I know.

Karal
04-01-2008, 09:54 PM
I've seen nothing amusing thus far.

At last... someone with some intelligence.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:54 PM
I've seen nothing amusing thus far.

Gosh, I'm going to have to kick the crap out of my assistant.

Did you get the harem invite?

No wonder you two are grumpy.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:54 PM
You do know it's April Fool's Day, yes?

Geesh.

Lighten up.

Maybe we need more sausage???

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:55 PM
Maybe we need more sausage???

Sausage is for every occasion.

Karal
04-01-2008, 09:56 PM
Gosh, I'm going to have to kick the crap out of my assistant.

Did you get the harem invite?

No wonder you two are grumpy.

Was I invited into the harem? I missed that.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:57 PM
No, it's still here. You people are amusing, at least.

And full of sausage, at most.


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 09:57 PM
Was I invited into the harem? I missed that.

Ah... it's just a worthless hole.

then again, there is sausage there.

(;))

drachin8
04-01-2008, 09:58 PM
:e2thud:


that's me, swooning

It looks more like you seeing Cranky's man-teat sausage in real life for the first time.


:)

-Michelle

Cranky
04-01-2008, 09:59 PM
Was I invited into the harem? I missed that.


I got your invite right here (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=2220225&postcount=48), sweetie.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:00 PM
At last... someone with some intelligence.

And yet, notice how little sausage MacAllister has. What use intelligence if one has no sausage?


:)

-Michelle

sassandgroove
04-01-2008, 10:02 PM
I smelll sausage...

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:02 PM
It looks more like you seeing Cranky's man-teat sausage in real life for the first time.


:)

-Michelle

I think there was more drooling involved at the first man-teat sighting. :D

sassandgroove
04-01-2008, 10:03 PM
I remember when newbies couldn't post in TIO....sigh...those were the days.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:04 PM
I smelll sausage...

Maybe it's....Snausages!!!!!!!

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:04 PM
Yeah - I had to make 50 productive posts before I could bitch about anything.

this place is going to ruin...

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:05 PM
I remember when newbies couldn't post in TIO....sigh...those were the days.

I remember when bunnies couldn't post in TIO also...and were made into sausage. Those were the days...


:)

-Michelle

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:07 PM
Yeah - I had to make 50 productive posts before I could bitch about anything.

this place is going to ruin...

Productive posts? What the heck are those?


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:09 PM
I've since forgotten.

Medievalist
04-01-2008, 10:10 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.

I'm a little perturbed by your tone, Missy.

Muddy water has just as much right to exist as any other kind of water.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:12 PM
Muddy water has just as much right to exist as any other kind of water.

Not to mention he was one kick-butt bluesman.

Birol
04-01-2008, 10:14 PM
Did someone say sausage?

sassandgroove
04-01-2008, 10:15 PM
yeah and Medievalist said, "Missy."

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:16 PM
Did someone say sausage?

You know, I think there might be room in my harem for you.

Just cuz.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:16 PM
I've since forgotten.

Well here, have another suasage until you figure it out.


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:16 PM
Uh-oh. someone's in trouble. Missy isn't tossed around here lightly, you know.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:18 PM
Well here, have another suasage until you figure it out.


:)

-Michelle
Why, thankee - one can never have too much sausage, yanno?

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:18 PM
You know, I think there might be room in my harem for you.

Just cuz.

Is there enough room in the harem for all of Robeiaieaeo's vowels? I see a lot of holes in that name waiting to be filled with sausage, and I ain't in a sharing mood!


:(

-Michelle

Birol
04-01-2008, 10:19 PM
You know, I think there might be room in my harem for you.

Just cuz.


Eww... I have a doppelganger around here somewhere. I think he'd enjoy that more. Me? I'm Batman!

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:19 PM
Why, thankee - one can never have too much sausage, yanno?

I like you. You're off my harem assassination list (and I'm not just saying that so you'll let your guard down).


:)

-Michelle

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:20 PM
Is there enough room in the harem for all of Robeiaieaeo's vowels? I see a lot of holes in that name waiting to be filled with sausage, and I ain't in a sharing mood!


:(

-Michelle

Here. Have another sausage. It's a mood enhancer.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1400/848407632_81bc916b3d.jpg?v=0

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:21 PM
I like you. You're off my harem assassination list (and I'm not just saying that so you'll let your guard down).


:)

-Michelle

You know, if we work together, we can get rid of everyone else and that's more sausage for us...

just a suggestion...

**keeps back against wall, just in case**

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:23 PM
Eww... I have a doppelganger around here somewhere. I think he'd enjoy that more. Me? I'm Batman!

Hey, I got'cher doppelganger right here, pally!! :tongue ...evil laugh...

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:24 PM
Eww... I have a doppelganger around here somewhere. I think he'd enjoy that more. Me? I'm Batman!

Fine. No sausage for YOU!

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:24 PM
Here. Have another sausage. It's a mood enhancer.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1400/848407632_81bc916b3d.jpg?v=0

And somewhere...John Holmes is smiling...

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:25 PM
And somewhere...John Holmes is smiling...

Really? I would think he'd be screaming...

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:26 PM
Whoa....

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:27 PM
Maybe I was thinking of John Dillinger...I understand there's a family resemblance...

dpaterso
04-01-2008, 10:30 PM
Renamed thread for clarity.

-Derek

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:31 PM
Here. Have another sausage. It's a mood enhancer.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1400/848407632_81bc916b3d.jpg?v=0

That makes me wish I hadn't just eaten lunch. Unlike your new sausage avatar which makes me glad I just ate lunch. What happened to your man-teat sausage? What kind of sick harem is this???


:)

-Michelle

maestrowork
04-01-2008, 10:33 PM
stop being suggestive. this is a family site!

III
04-01-2008, 10:33 PM
People, please. If you can't keep this civil I'm going to have to punt it to TIO.

aka eraser
04-01-2008, 10:34 PM
How did I get here? Who is that giant-headed creature on my left and why do I smell like a fish?

I want answers dammit!!

Oh GREAT!!

There's WORMS in my keyboard!!

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:36 PM
That makes me wish I hadn't just eaten lunch. Unlike your new sausage avatar which makes me glad I just ate lunch. What happened to your man-teat sausage? What kind of sick harem is this???


:)

-Michelle

Don't fear, sweetie. I'll get my muscles back.

And then it's ON!

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:36 PM
stop being suggestive. this is a family site!

You're just jealous you don't have any of Cranky's man-teat sausage! Nyah nyah!


:)

-Michelle

CatSlave
04-01-2008, 10:38 PM
Mmmm, sausage!
It's like bacon, only bigger.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:39 PM
sausage = happiness

C.bronco
04-01-2008, 10:40 PM
I've spent the better part of two days trying to figure out what the hell this place is for and I've yet to be able to find a good reason for its existence. Is it a debate site? A place for goofy people to congregate? Or a writers' site?

If it's the latter, why don't you get rid of the other crap? It's just muddying the water.
Who shows up in a community of writers on April Fool's Day and expects us to behave (not that we do on any other day)?

I think the AW Cooler is precisely that: a community of writers. Sometimes we talk shop and sometimes we don't.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:41 PM
personally, i think we're all nuts

we just hide it real well until April 1 rolls around...

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:42 PM
personally, i think we're all nuts

we just hide it real well until April 1 rolls around...

Are you kidding? I always let it all hang out.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:43 PM
i stand corrected...

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:44 PM
personally, i think we're all nuts

we just hide it real well until April 1 rolls around...

I think we are just a bunch of regular people hungry for a bit of sausage in our lives. And is that really such a bad thing?


-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:45 PM
Not a bit. Who doesn't want sausage?

James81
04-01-2008, 10:45 PM
Anybody want to buy some PHETERMINE?

Spinal Tapestry
04-01-2008, 10:45 PM
this is a sausage board? I thought it was for poetry.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 10:46 PM
Are you kidding? I always let it all hang out.

And then pack it in a bun...

CatSlave
04-01-2008, 10:46 PM
Here. Have another sausage. It's a mood enhancer.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1400/848407632_81bc916b3d.jpg?v=0
That reminds me of an old scene from WKRP in Cincinnati:
The staff got together and went to see a 3D porn flick.
I don't know what was on the movie screen, but as a group they kept flinching and jerking as if to avoid getting hit by what they were watching.

*if it weren't for low class, I'd have no class at all*

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:47 PM
this is a sausage board? I thought it was for poetry.

Only if the poetry contains references to sausage. And seriously, can we really call anything else poetry?


:)

-Michelle

James81
04-01-2008, 10:48 PM
How about some free PHETERMINE?

Yes, I'm giving some away to the next 10 people.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:48 PM
PHENTERMINE and sausage = poetry

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:49 PM
And then pack it in a bun...

There isn't a bun big enough.

That's why you're SECOND in command.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:49 PM
sausage = love
PHENTERMINE and sausage = wtf


:)

-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:51 PM
Man - I'm losing track of what I've posted where - too much sausage!

i never thought i'd ever hear myself say that

Dawno
04-01-2008, 10:54 PM
People, please. If you can't keep this civil I'm going to have to punt it to TIO.

What a wimpy wet-rag mod that Dawno_o is. You should lock it and ban 'em all next time they get out of line.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 10:56 PM
Man - I'm losing track of what I've posted where - too much sausage!

i never thought i'd ever hear myself say that

Too much sausage? TOO MUCH SAUSAGE????? Alright, you're back on the harem assassination list. Blasphemy will not be tolerated!


-Michelle

III
04-01-2008, 10:56 PM
What a wimpy wet-rag mod that Dawno_o is. You should lock it and ban 'em all next time they get out of line.

And I'm keeping one eye on you too, mister.

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:56 PM
What a wimpy wet-rag mod that Dawno_o is. You should lock it and ban 'em all next time they get out of line.

I guess you didn't have any sausage, either.

What is AW coming to? They should hand 'em out at the front door.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 10:58 PM
Did I say too much sausage!

No - someone must've posted under my name....

yeah... that's it...

Cranky
04-01-2008, 10:59 PM
Did I say too much sausage!

No - someone must've posted under my name....

yeah... that's it...

Never doubt the hypnotic power of my man-titty.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 11:05 PM
There isn't a bun big enough.

That's why you're SECOND in command.

Whatever. I'm just glad to see Sargeant Long-Nip is back.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 11:15 PM
Man-titty should always be used for good, never evil.

sassandgroove
04-01-2008, 11:18 PM
O_o

Cranky
04-01-2008, 11:18 PM
Man-titty should always be used for good, never evil.

I embody all that is good in the universe.

No worries, sugarbritches.

drachin8
04-01-2008, 11:19 PM
Man-titty should always be used for good, never evil.

I don't think evil can come of man-teat, especially not man-teat with sausage.

All hail sausage-y man-teat!


-Michelle

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 11:19 PM
And that's why you're the man-titty man!

Cranky
04-01-2008, 11:21 PM
Oh yeah.

maestrowork
04-01-2008, 11:24 PM
mantities are my family marine animals.

Gravity
04-01-2008, 11:33 PM
Yeah, but they're always getting cut in two by power boats.

Jersey Chick
04-01-2008, 11:35 PM
poor, poor, mantities :(

NeuroFizz
04-01-2008, 11:37 PM
Marchetti, C. and P.J. Drent. Individual Differences in the Use of Social Information in Foraging by Captive Great Tits. Animal Behaviour 60: 131-140 (2000).

Medievalist
04-01-2008, 11:38 PM
Marchetti, C. and P.J. Drent. Individual Differences in the Use of Social Information in Foraging by Captive Great Tits. Animal Behaviour 60: 131-140 (2000).

There's a lot to be said for Captive Great Tits.

The Blue Tit? Not so much.

NeuroFizz
04-01-2008, 11:43 PM
And they forage!

choppersmom
04-01-2008, 11:46 PM
My Great Tits refuse to be captives. They want to bounce freeeeeeeeee, free to forage, free to use social information while foraging. Foraging for what I couldn't tell you, but there they are, foraging away happily, until some nuffer comes along and spoils EVERYTHING. They are enraged now.

dolores haze
04-01-2008, 11:49 PM
Gilded Tits are my favorite. So perky, so pretty, so shineeeee.

StephanieFox
04-02-2008, 12:37 AM
I come here because this is the only message board I've ever seen where people know how to use an apostrophe.

underthecity
04-02-2008, 12:40 AM
I came for the sausage,

but stayed for the jiggling titties.

allen

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 12:43 AM
Man-titties are gentle creatures

http://myfwc.com/manatee/photogallery/manateeimageslarge2/billboard4.jpg

and they don't eat sausages.

sassandgroove
04-02-2008, 12:45 AM
They just play one on tv.

drachin8
04-02-2008, 12:45 AM
Man-titties are gentle creatures

http://myfwc.com/manatee/photogallery/manateeimageslarge2/billboard4.jpg

and they don't eat sausages.

Are you sure that isn't a floating sausage? It looks a lot like a sausage to me...


-Michelle

Gravity
04-02-2008, 12:51 AM
I come here because this is the only message board I've ever seen where people know how to use an apostrophe.

I cant believe you said that...

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 12:53 AM
Are you sure that isn't a floating sausage? It looks a lot like a sausage to me...


-Michelle

After a while, everything looks like sausage. My enraged Tits are looking pretty greasy and elongated right now too.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 12:54 AM
http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/i/dining/lourdes/3.21.08/Untitled-2.jpg

Admit it: you're really here for the man-titties.

maestrowork
04-02-2008, 12:55 AM
or sausage.

sassandgroove
04-02-2008, 12:56 AM
OMG.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 12:58 AM
OMG.
You're welcome. :D

Don Allen
04-02-2008, 01:03 AM
I'm gone for 100 posts,,,, you change the freaken name and start talking about tits instead of sausages,,,,, Where is the LOVE, I ask you......!!!

NeuroFizz
04-02-2008, 01:03 AM
Krishna, his hare is like rabid fir tree blotting son from the manatee.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 01:11 AM
I'm gone for 100 posts,,,, you change the freaken name and start talking about tits instead of sausages,,,,, Where is the LOVE, I ask you......!!!
We LOVE man-titties. :)

drachin8
04-02-2008, 01:20 AM
Admit it: you're really here for the man-titties.

I can't see the man-titties--there's too much fur! That picture does make me want to scratch his belly though and see if he'd purr...


:)

-Michelle

Karal
04-02-2008, 01:21 AM
I got your invite right here (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=2220225&postcount=48), sweetie.

Baby, a hot piece of me and a cold glass of water'd kill you deader'n hell.

drachin8
04-02-2008, 01:35 AM
Baby, a hot piece of me and a cold glass of water'd kill you deader'n hell.

Are you irradiated?


-Michelle

rhymegirl
04-02-2008, 01:40 AM
[QUOTE=CatSlave;2221606]http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/i/dining/lourdes/3.21.08/Untitled-2.jpg

Is that Viggo????

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 01:43 AM
http://i90.photobucket.com/albums/k246/musicnut_2006/roast%202/Man_Boobs.jpg

Now that's what I'm talkin' about.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-02-2008, 01:49 AM
I'm a little concerned about the dark, wet stains on his pants...

Karal
04-02-2008, 01:51 AM
I'm a little concerned, period. You people do go on.

Don Allen
04-02-2008, 01:55 AM
It's got to be time to drink...

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 02:06 AM
I'm a little concerned, period. You people do go on.

And on and on.

And on.

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 02:07 AM
I'm a little concerned about the dark, wet stains on his pants...

Everything about that boy worries me. That's the future of our country, right there.

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 02:08 AM
It's got to be time to drink...

What with time zones and all, it's always happy hour somewhere! Break out the blender!

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 02:11 AM
[quote=CatSlave;2221606]http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/i/dining/lourdes/3.21.08/Untitled-2.jpg

Is that Viggo????
YOWZA!
I mean, yes.

*pant, drool*

choppersmom
04-02-2008, 02:13 AM
[quote=rhymegirl;2221840]
YOWZA!
I mean, yes.

*pant, drool*

He's workin' those corduroys, all right.

Gravity
04-02-2008, 02:21 AM
:::blush::: Aw, ya'll just caught me on a good day, that's all. Shucks...

Cranky
04-02-2008, 02:24 AM
Baby, a hot piece of me and a cold glass of water'd kill you deader'n hell.

oh, but I'd die a happy, happy man, sweet thing.

Karal
04-02-2008, 02:44 AM
You're smarter than you look in that hat... but with the -ahem- size of the sausage, I'm inclined to overlook it.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 02:46 AM
You're smarter than you look in that hat... but with the -ahem- size of the sausage, I'm inclined to overlook it.

You won't be sorry, babe.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 02:52 AM
:::blush::: Aw, ya'll just caught me on a good day, that's all. Shucks...
I think I love you.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 02:53 AM
I think I love you.

If I give you sausages, will you love me more?

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 03:06 AM
If I give you sausages, will you love me more?
I love you long time. :D
Move over, Karal.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 03:07 AM
I love you long time. :D
Move over, Karal.


Sweet! But no shoving. My ladies must show decorum at all times. :D

Except when flinging themselves at me.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 03:16 AM
http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/i/dining/lourdes/3.21.08/Untitled-2.jpg

Admit it: you're really here for the man-titties.

Holy....

**Faints dead away yet again**

the concussion is soooo worth it, though :D

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 03:18 AM
Holy....

**Faints dead away yet again**

the concussion is soooo worth it, though :D
Beats setting your hair on fire.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 03:28 AM
Oh absolutely... Viggo makes me want to throw my lighters away forever.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 03:29 AM
Oh absolutely... Viggo makes me want to throw my lighters away forever.

You cut me to the quick, ye faithless hussy!

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 03:56 AM
You cut me to the quick, ye faithless hussy!
She's just looking, don'tcha know?
Besides, you need to preheat the grill a bit before you start cooking.

Anyway, it looks like Karel is still hanging around.
I bet she wants to touch your sausage.

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:02 AM
You won't be sorry, babe.

If I hadn't checked your profile, I'd think you were serious.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:03 AM
If I hadn't checked your profile, I'd think you were serious.


A cautious one, eh, my sweet?

Your brains are dazzling. :D

ETA: Besides, how do you know that profile is right, hmm? On the internet, we can be anyone.

*waggles eyebrows*

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:04 AM
Anyway, it looks like Karel is still hanging around.
I bet she wants to touch your sausage.

Aw, now, the least you could do is spell my name correctly!

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:04 AM
A cautious one, eh, my sweet?

Your brains are dazzling. :D


Well, so's that big sausage! It almost made me forget to be cautious!

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 04:05 AM
Aw, now, the least you could do is spell my name correctly!
Sorry, Karal. *blush*

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:06 AM
Well, so's that big sausage! It almost made me forget to be cautious!


It's hypnotic. My mojo.

Love it. Fear it.

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:07 AM
It's hypnotic. My mojo.

Love it. Fear it.

It's definitely got that 'certain something'. Wicked voodoo.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:09 AM
It's definitely got that 'certain something'. Wicked voodoo.

You know it, sugarbritches.

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:13 AM
You keep that up and you just might convince me to hang around these parts. You people are really nicer than you first appeared. Except for a few of you, any way. Can an accused 'troll' ever be accepted as 'one of the gang'?

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:15 AM
You keep that up and you just might convince me to hang around these parts. You people are really nicer than you first appeared. Except for a few of you, any way. Can an accused 'troll' ever be accepted as 'one of the gang'?


I checked your profile. (Ohyeahbaby)

I think you'll fit in juuuuuuuust fine. Don't worry, my sweet. I'll protect you from those who would smear your good name.

I have a giant sausage, after all. They'll all either cower in fear and awe, or dissolve into a puddle of drool.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 04:16 AM
Hey - wait a minute - I thought I was sugarbritches!

I swear, Viggo means nothing to me... it's all you, Cerebral Sausage Guy! :D

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:17 AM
Hey - wait a minute - I thought I was sugarbritches!

I swear, Viggo means nothing to me... it's all you, Cerebral Sausage Guy! :D

You're a faithless hussy, Jersey. I don't know if you deserve the title of "sugarbritches". You'll have to earn it back, or another, equally sweet title.

Karal seems quite deserving of her new title.

Perhaps I shall call you Sausage Tart.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 04:18 AM
Sausage Tart!!!

I was just looking.... I'm not dead, yanno.


you hurted me...

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:19 AM
Sausage Tart!!!

I was just looking.... I'm not dead, yanno.


you hurted me...


It's all right. You know you still love me. Sweet Tart, then.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 04:21 AM
Oh, absolutely...

Sweet Tart - I could get behind that :D

roskoebaby
04-02-2008, 04:30 AM
I love polish sausage!

Karal
04-02-2008, 04:31 AM
And here I thought there was going to be a fight over you and I'd be the first one there.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:32 AM
I love polish sausage!

Then you're in the right place, honey.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:33 AM
And here I thought there was going to be a fight over you and I'd be the first one there.

Why fight? There's acres of me to love.

roskoebaby
04-02-2008, 04:35 AM
Why fight? There's acres of me to love.

It's the inches I'm concerned with. Looks good. lol.

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:36 AM
It's the inches I'm concerned with. Looks good. lol.

Yup. I have a MAGIC cornucopia, too.

Wanna join my harem?

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 04:37 AM
You keep that up and you just might convince me to hang around these parts. You people are really nicer than you first appeared. Except for a few of you, any way. Can an accused 'troll' ever be accepted as 'one of the gang'?
When you are under the protection of The Mighty Mojo,
The Supreme Sausage,
The Man-titties Who Vanquishes Evil,
you have nothing to fear.

Except maybe Jerz and her Bic.

roskoebaby
04-02-2008, 04:40 AM
Yup. I have a MAGIC cornucopia, too.

Wanna join my harem?

Hm, tempting. But I'm not really good at the harem thing. I'm too into bitchfighting. There'd be a lot of hair pulling and stuff. And not the good kind. ;)

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:41 AM
Hm, tempting. But I'm not really good at the harem thing. I'm too into bitchfighting. There'd be a lot of hair pulling and stuff. And not the good kind. ;)

There is no hair-pulling in my harem. The power of my Mojo removes all violent tendencies.

Come closer, my darling.

roskoebaby
04-02-2008, 04:42 AM
There is no hair-pulling in my harem. The power of my Mojo removes all violent tendencies.

Come closer, my darling.

I....must....resist....the sausage......

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:44 AM
I....must....resist....the sausage......

I'm like Dracula, baby. Or the Borg.

Resistance is futile. Succumb to my meaty charms.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 04:54 AM
Resistance is futile. Succumb to my meaty charms.
Oh. My. Gawd.
"Meaty charms?"

How could any red-blooded woman resist such a thrilling and decadent
glimpse of what is to come (so to speak)?

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 04:56 AM
There's room enough for all - I don't mind sharing, as long as I get my share.. :D

Cranky
04-02-2008, 04:58 AM
Oh. My. Gawd.
"Meaty charms?"

How could any red-blooded woman resist such a thrilling and decadent
glimpse of what is to come (so to speak)?

Beats me. Does such a creature exist? I shall find her and attempt to seduce her anyway.

CatSlave
04-02-2008, 04:59 AM
There's room enough for all - I don't mind sharing, as long as I get my share.. :D
We could make a sausage sandwich.
Yeah, that's the ticket.

Jersey Chick
04-02-2008, 04:59 AM
Works for me... a sausage sammich...