how to flow from one paragraph to another

Can you give a few examples?

The three paragraphs in your post follow nicely one from another.

Dale

meadows_edge said:

Surely it whispers, I should be glorious.

I don't want to be glorious. I want a re-do.

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This transition is brilliant! It quickly and sharply and elegantly shows the gulf between should and want.

I want a re-do. ... Do-over begins.

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These sentences nicely bookend the paragraph and reinforce its theme. And they do it in a way that we readers know for sure the paragraph is over and a new idea is coming...

Instead we read our 'coffee' books ...

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If "instead" means something like "instead of doing it over differently, we continue as we always do, as we always have," then this transition works, too.

If "instead" means something else, then maybe there's a small bit of transition missing.

Dale

meadows_edge said:

Is that too mechanical?

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The technique is mechanical. I have no doubt that you will execute it artfully, that the product will be artful in your hands.

Does that make sense?

Dale

I think this is a problem that really only exists in your head. That's a good thing. Just get on and write and let your readers do the work of going from one paragraph to the next. Judging by the example that you posted, they won't find that hard at all.

Start a new paragraph when you're shifting the focus of the reader in some way (or for dialogue) and you'll be fine.

That's a first draft?

I think I'll just give up now.

I think your transitions are just dandy.

O.K., am I missing something here? Are you all saying there's nothing wrong with Meadow's three paragraphs? The writing is very nice, certainly, but he or she wants to write a story. Unless the ceiling fell on me a minute ago and now I'm brain-damaged, there's no semblance of a story there. As he/she says, just disconnected sentences and paragraphs. Well-written ones to be sure, but I see the same gobbledygook Meadow does. Actually, I do have a headache.

wrinkles said:

O.K., am I missing something here? Are you all saying there's nothing wrong with Meadow's three paragraphs?

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I was restricting myself to Meadow's question about transitions.

Dale

wrinkles said:

O.K., am I missing something here? Are you all saying there's nothing wrong with Meadow's three paragraphs? The writing is very nice, certainly, but he or she wants to write a story. Unless the ceiling fell on me a minute ago and now I'm brain-damaged, there's no semblance of a story there. As he/she says, just disconnected sentences and paragraphs. Well-written ones to be sure, but I see the same gobbledygook Meadow does. Actually, I do have a headache.

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No one is saying there's nothing wrong - this isn't SYW! There was a particular question about transitions between paragraphs and I don't think there are any problems with that in this writing. I don't see a story, exactly. But I do see a train of thought that links the paragraphs. I think the OP needs to get on and write the story and not worry at this stage about whether one paragraph flows to the next, because they do. Hopefully the story will come out in the rest of this draft and then (s)he'll be able to go back and work out how/if these paragraphs contribute to the story.

The Vampire

From my outside point of view, it seems as if your energy is being drawn towards the “construction” of your sentences and paragraphs, when what you really want to do is tell a story. While writing a first draft, the compulsion to focus on the construction of language can be like a vampire, sucking out all of the creative blood. It must be slain if you are ever going to get past chapter one, and surely past all the ones that come after.

I have known several poets who tried their hand at novel writing. They all struggled with this concept of (for the first draft) letting the language go. For them it was a bit like pulling fillings without the Novocain. But writing is painful, and so is change. If you want to write a novel…and I mean “really” do it—not just tinker around with words on a page, but tell some phenomenal story that you feel “must” be told, at all costs—then I suggest you try this exercise.

Exercise: Simply this. Tell yourself you are going to write badly. The worst! Piss-poor. You are going to do this until you find the story and follow it to the end. Tell yourself that words are nothing but a hindrance to you, and the only reason that you are bothering with them is because that’s the only way you can share this extraordinary story that is trying like hell to burst out of you like that alien in the first Alien movie.

Once you have the story on paper, the flow from paragraph to paragraph will more than likely work itself out. Then you can build your skyscraper of language…but first, lay down that foundation. Find those extraordinary characters, and those unusual circumstances.

Remember, no one has to read your first draft. Maybe even no one should. Not until the story begins to come alive later. You may hear the great “Language Monster” scratching at your window in the night, whispering through the walls that you must get the flow of the paragraphs right before you could possibly type another word of actual story, but you must resist! Hold fast, and tame the beast! Plow though, and write even faster. Even worse. Do what it takes, then come back later and make it sing. You may even discover that the “bad” writing wasn’t so bad after all.

I’m rooting for you!

wrinkles said:

O.K., am I missing something here? Are you all saying there's nothing wrong with Meadow's three paragraphs? .

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Personally all I was saying I wish my first drafts were as good as that. My first drafts are, well, pants.

Yes there is stuff that could be changed/ tidied, but it's a first draft, not a polished product, and as such it looks pretty good to me ( depends on the context of the rest ofc) and the transitions are linked fine, IMO.

Hey meadows. Now that I've criticized, let me give you advice, for what it's worth. This story you mention you want to write, do you have a good grasp of it? I believe stories (short stories or novels) can be based on any number of things: a character, the interaction between characters, a theme, a situation, a premise, a plot. So, can you express the impetus behind your story in a sentence? Not the story itself, just what will generate the story.

If you can do this, then the next step might be to outline the story that results. I take no side in the outline vs. seat-of-the-pants debate. Both are valid. Whatever gets you to The End is the right way to go. But if you are pantsing it and the story is getting lost in the words, maybe you should try one or more of the outlining/planning methods that have been described in the various forums to pull the story out. And if you can't outline it so that a coherent story emerges, maybe you should move on to the next idea. Good luck.

Meadows_edg,

Enjoy the ride!

meadows_edge said:

I am going to write piss-poor. Just get the stupid story on paper. It's not going to be easy to ignore my sentences but everytime I pause to stare at one, I going to give my mind a thawp. Thank goodness - it's getting clearer what I need to do.

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That's exactly it. An internal editor is a great thing, until he keeps you from getting the story down. Giving yourself permission to write crap is a start. It doesn't mean you WILL write crap, just that youare freeing yourself from the paralysis.

Write, then edit, then polish until it shines.

meadows edge. I didn't know how to write my story either. So I just wrote it as a children's story. It was crap, but I just kept going with it and it turned into something else. My first post on SYW was really bad, however I had so much help from all the critters, that I'm now into my fourth children's chapter book. They all need a lot of work yet, but now I have found that I love writing for children instead.

I did what egads, has suggested. I just wrote however it came out.

I love the way you write and I'm sure you will have a great book one day. Good Luck.

Well, the smallest unit of writing in a story is a paragraph, not a sentence. You seem like you want to learn to string paragraphs. This is called "chaining." First you need enough of an idea to work with. You chain by stating last the subject that will come first in the next paragraph. That will create a flow. To do this you need an internal structure for the entire work. For this, you need an outline, or the ability to outline in your head.

I just feel that you are writing separate paragraphs about various subjects because you have not done any planning and don't know what to write, so you are just grasping straws and writing anything that comes to mind.

Why not practice by doing something like writing the steps to getting up in the morning or something that requires steps. A story requires steps, that is what a plot is, a time based series of events leading to a conclusion of some sort. So what steps do your characters need to get from the beginning to the end of the story. Write this in an outline (an outline is a quickly written list of the steps often with steps within steps). Even in school essays, you write outlines, right? Well, good luck with this!

meadows_edge said:

Why can't it be a quiet partner, content with silent acknowlegment?

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That's beautiful....

Write now, worry later....

Because we don't think in the same way that we talk, these paragraphs would be brilliant as a character's thoughts. If I were reading a novel, with the inner monologue reading like this, I wouldn't be able to put the book down.


Elodie

meadows_edge said:

Thank you Dale

Surely, I should be glorious. Instead my gut feels distended, having bitten and swallowed normalcy in huge, unchewed chunks. Memory is unsettled. Memory witnesses normalcy sopping momentum until I am solidly upright, able to blend in, carry a conversation, meet other's needs. Memory frets and stammers seeing a pendulum stuck at mid arc. I ry to defecate memory, straining in the car, at work, in the presence of a neighbor on the lawn. Why can't it be a quiet partner, content with silent acknowlegment? See how I once sampled the cat's food having noticed the bowl during my walk down that long hall. See how I watched them make the toes curl on her limp body. See how I manuevered despite the restraints and urinated on to the floor. Surely it whispers, I should be glorious.

I don't want to be glorious. I want a re-do. Upstairs your small head pressing a crib pillow, downstairs my thighs melting into the couch. On television, Tooth City is being attacked by cavity monsters, a 180 beats a minute skirmish ending quickly with a toothpaste victory, except for my appreciative heart which I decide needs to explain itself to a doctor. Do-over begins.

Instead we read our 'coffee' books, the small round table keeping us thick with each other's presence. Whipped cream floats on my hot chocolate. Large corner windows, sounds of purchases and casual conversation scaffold our silence. Several times, your right hand brushes your nose. I stick my finger in my mouth for a chew. Unattended, a half-inch of reddish growth violates your thin face and I sit, glancing, imaging an unfamiliarity.

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In my opinion, your sample paragraphs are indeed poetry-intense. Long-form prose this dense throughout? I think it would be like a neutron star, with matter packed so tightly together, with gravity so strong, it could suck readers in only to crush them. In other words, it could be a tough read. I have no problem with the paragraph transitions. I also can't imagine reading beyond paragraph three for story. Instead I might just flip through the book and admire an isolated sentence here and there.

As egads brilliantly advised, loosen up, way up, in that first draft. Write fast. Don't look back.