I just want to go away

It's hard not to feel that way at 5:15 am. I do, too.

Unfortunately, instead of going back to bed, like I'd like .......I have to go to work.

GRR.

Hang in there.

Who would have written that post? You have to make yourself count. Nobody else can do that for you. Get yourself into a positive pattern and you will forget to take stock in yourself. I do it all the time. You are definitely not alone.

"Every thread in the weave is necessary."
-me mum, who always knew how to get me out of bed in the morning



You're definitely not alone.

I used to feel like that. We all have our ups and downs. I hardly get any rep points anymore.

JJ

dpaterso said:

Everyone has me on ignore, I'm a message board ghost.

-Derek

Click to expand...

I would never ignore a shiny happy Jesus.

dpaterso said:

KTC, you saw my post! I didn't think that was technically possible! Bless you for replying!

-Derek

Click to expand...

Every Wednesday morning I delete my ignore list for 1 hour. It's your lucky Wednesday, Jesus.

KTC said:

I would never ignore a shiny happy Jesus.

Click to expand...

I believe the technical term is "Buddy Christ"

Off of Dogma.

Should we be worried about the OP? I hope it's a board mini-flounce and not a life one.

JJ

Well, BFT, we loves ya. Some people have to know who else needs them besides themselves. I'm like that. It gets confusing because I end up losing myself in the process, then need to sit back and pull the ends in together to remember that's a big part of who I am, the people who love me/need me. For instance, there's this job we've been slowly finishing all winter. We're changing windows and doors, for goodness sake. It shouldn't take forever. This, on the tail end of rain damage renovation from an alcoholic roofer. The family went different directions moving out for a while, kids 20, 21 quickly losing track of their stroke handicapped father, except to drop in once or twice a week. We make sure we do at least half a day several times a week. lol But I see him getting out of bed. I see him taking showers. I see him smiling again. I'm getting old, my kids have left and I can't do even half what I used to do. But it makes me happy that I am still being led to places where being there makes a difference to someone's life--mine included. But I have to take stock occasionally when I begin to feel like a pauper. Money is necessary, not the thing that makes me happy.

With a wife and seven kids - you can't possibly be unnecessary. Maybe the way to go, is to challenge yourself with what you're writing. I'm just going through a change of medication and it's not working. I've been booked into hospital for 26 days next month and for some strange reason I've been feeling down. So I've given myself a challenge to make the start of my WIP - the third of a series - as snappy as possible. And it's working. I hope something starts working for you, BFT, I really do.

No one is unecessary all the time, as you can see from the replies, everyone feels that way sometimes. We need you, if only to point out feelings we all have but may have not mentioned yet.

bluntforcetrauma said:

I feel so unnecessary

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BFT, no one is UNNECESSARY! Least of all, you. In times past, I used to say that I wanted to be a hermit and go live in the caves of Crete. I didn't. I waited, and now, my granddaughter lives with me. I'm necessary again, really necessary.

I feel that way a lot, too. For whatever reason. Lately, it's because I'm in a slump with a lot of stress, and I'm reaching my maximum limit. Hopefully, things will turn around soon.

bluntforcetrauma said:

I feel so unnecessary

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Dude, seriously? You're one of my favorite people on AW! Plus you have totally bitchin' hair. And you're a musician. And you're a kind-hearted brother in Christ with loads of insight. And you're an experienced father and husband. And you're part of this family. And you've got a wickedcool username.

I know you're going through a really tough time, but there are a lot of folks on AW who are going through and have been through the same thing; and a lot of folks who will go through it in the future and will look back on your posts and say "If BFT got through it, I can too."

So take your coat back off and throw it on the floor. You're home.

bluntforcetrauma said:

I feel so unnecessary

Click to expand...

You're cute, I'm bored, c'mon over.

Oh, wait. Wife and 7 kids?
Nevermind...............

Give your oldest kid a long piece of clothesline. Tell him to play 'Roundup' with the younger kids. Describe the results. Submit.

You feel unnecessary? Try this:

I AM unnecessary.

Hope my own impediment makes you feel a tad better.



Cheers.

dpaterso said:

Everyone has me on ignore, I'm a message board ghost.

-Derek

Click to expand...

I don't have anyone on ignore. I'm omniscient!

No father is unnecessary.

BluntForceTrauma, you have a big family, so if you think you are unneccessary, picture just how neccessary you are from each of their perspectives.

Underappreciated, of course--it's the lot of all of us parents! Misunderstood, of course--it's the lot of all of us writers, until we find the right voice. Unneccessary, never.

Take stock in what things you do that matter to others. Now up the ante. It's about the others, man. You'll find your troubles don't matter when you make others matter.

Finally, make more frequent contact with your friends in actual meatspace, stay online with us, and let us know how you're doing day to day, right here in this thread.

Peace.

bluntforcetrauma said:

I feel so unnecessary

Click to expand...

I can understand, 'cause I feel the same, too.

I am trying to figure out if that was a flounce. . . but it can't be because I know that BFT would flourish the dramatic cattle prod if he was going to flounce us and be outtie 5000.


Though, if it was a flounce, I think you need a little work at it.

That being said, in the chain of inter-connectedness, there are really no unnecessary components. Just some components that are temporarily without service as they redefine their roles. Just changed the key a little bit, their is a lock for you somewhere.