PDA

View Full Version : Worst pick up lines



jst5150
02-15-2008, 09:07 PM
This list is a little tough to get through, but it's got some gems, like:


My shameless pickup line: "Do you clean your clothes with windex? [awkward pause] Because I see myself in your pants"
http://www.pick-up-artists.org/page/Worst+Pickup+Lines+Ever?t=anon

I can't imagine any AWers with bad pickup lines, but, if you got one, share it.

AndreaGS
02-15-2008, 09:10 PM
Ok, this one always struck me as pretty horrible, and probably unsuccessful.

*wrinkles nose* "Did you fart? [awkward pause] Because you blew me away!"

Celia Cyanide
02-15-2008, 09:11 PM
Someone once said to me, "You're a hell of a lot prettier than that." When I asked, "than what?" he replied, "I dunno, something else. You look good." ??????????????????

maestrowork
02-15-2008, 09:24 PM
"Can I push your stool in?" I always find that hilarious.

CaroGirl
02-15-2008, 09:29 PM
When I was young and unaccustomed to being hit-on, I had a guy ask me if I'd ever caused an accident. I got all flustered and didn't know what to say because I didn't take his meaning. He meant that my looks would stop traffic. The whole encounter was a disaster from start to finish.

kristie911
02-15-2008, 09:31 PM
"Can I push your stool in?" I always find that hilarious.

Ew.

Perks
02-15-2008, 09:33 PM
The best of the worst or the worst of the best (whichever you prefer) was submitted on 12-13-2005 by our very own trumancoyote. Brace yourselves.


Excuse me, but does this napkin smell like chloroform?

jst5150
02-15-2008, 09:34 PM
"Can I push your stool in?" I always find that hilarious.

:roll:

quickWit
02-15-2008, 09:34 PM
"Can I push your stool in?" I always find that hilarious.

That's so horrible it's fantastic :D

I'm using that next time I need to get slapped.

bluntforcetrauma
02-15-2008, 09:55 PM
"I'll have you back to the nursing home in time for Jeopardy. Now...drop 'em, gramps."

Hey, I just came up with that. It's sick. I love it.

Sarita
02-15-2008, 11:00 PM
I saw a "bed rock" one on the list. A geologist student at the university gave me one once, it was something like:

What's your major? Oh, Anthropology? I'm a geologist. I can make your bed rock.

Eskimo1990
02-16-2008, 12:09 AM
Is that a mirror in your pocket? [No, why?] Because I can see myself in your pants.


No, I have never used this or ANY pickup lines but my sister and her friend have a fun time making up pick lines for some reason...maybe I'll post a few later

Hillary
02-16-2008, 12:15 AM
Once, I was waiting in a drive-thru and a guy in the car ahead of me stopped, hopped out, and came to my window. He asked me to come to his house because he was having a party. I declined, noting something about having to work. So he whipped out "But I'm in the Navy, and I'm shipping out tomorrow, so this could be my last night here... Forever..."

I wanted to hit him. One, because it was so cheesy, and two - who uses potential death in the service (which I'm doubting he was even a part of, clearly) as a pick-up line?

Low.

Shadow_Ferret
02-16-2008, 12:31 AM
So he whipped out "But I'm in the Navy, and I'm shipping out tomorrow, so this could be my last night here... Forever..."

Actually, we all use that line in every port, because often we don't return to that port ever again. Has nothing to do with death and it's a line as old as the seas.

When I was in the Navy I used to give a bottle of wine to every girl I dated, that way I could say I had a port in every girl.

Jersey Chick
02-16-2008, 12:39 AM
Way back in my young and single days, someone actually used this on me in a grocery store parking lot:

"Is your father a baker? Because you have great buns."

Unreal. He actually thought it'd work. idiot

KTC
02-16-2008, 01:19 AM
Do you do laundry?

Tiger
02-16-2008, 01:21 AM
"You don't want to go out with me, do you?"

KTC
02-16-2008, 01:23 AM
My brother used this once...


"How'd you like to wake up to this!"


The answer, of course, was no. Have you seen my brother.

Devil Ledbetter
02-16-2008, 01:53 AM
The best of the worst or the worst of the best (whichever you prefer) was submitted on 12-13-2005 by our very own trumancoyote. Brace yourselves.That's fabulous. TrumanCoyote is going to wonder why I repped her on a post she made in 2005, though.

KTC
02-16-2008, 02:10 AM
That's fabulous. TrumanCoyote is going to wonder why I repped her on a post she made in 2005, though.


HIM. Where are you, Zach, ole boy? I mean, besides over there where they don't speak my language?

Stew21
02-16-2008, 02:26 AM
You would have loved Zach (truman), Devil. I wish he'd come back!

Silver King
02-16-2008, 02:41 AM
I mentioned this one not long ago, but it's worth repeating as a warning to others who may be sharpening their pick-up line skills.

I was in a bar once, and the more I drank, the more I became smitten with the bartender. Toward closing time, I said, "So, what time do you get off?"

She said, "I get off all the time, but never with jerks like you."

My memory is a little foggy, but she may have said "assholes" instead of "jerks." Either way, that woman sure wrecked my night.

rhymegirl
02-16-2008, 02:52 AM
Oh poor Silver King.

You should have told her a fish story.

Silver King
02-16-2008, 02:59 AM
Oh poor Silver King.

You should have told her a fish story.
I was saving that for the pillow talk that never took place.

rhymegirl
02-16-2008, 03:02 AM
I was saving that for the pillow talk that never took place.

See, that was your mistake.

Lead with the fish story, get her "hooked", then throw her a "line" later.

Simple.

Mr Flibble
02-16-2008, 03:05 AM
I've had some pretty dire ones said to me at times

'get your coat love, you've pulled.' Oh how romantic.

'How do you like your eggs in the morning?' Unfertilized thanks

One said to a mate of mine
'you scrub up well for a fat lass'

One that actually worked:

He tried lame line
I said ( quite truthfully at the time) My boyfriend is 6'4" and used to play for the England Under 21 rugby team
He says, Never mind, I've got a shotgun. Want a drink?

I split up with said boyfriend a week later and gave that guy a calll...

sunna
02-16-2008, 03:12 AM
My sister got the old "Was your father a thief?" [No, why?] "Because I could swear he stole the stars and put them in your eyes."


My fav was a guy who sat next to me, waved the bartender over, and said (to me, not the bartender) "I'm having a beer, but I bet you'd like a slow comfortable screw up against the wall, wouldn't you?"


Mmmn. Come-on lines from drink names. Be still my heart.

Devil Ledbetter
02-16-2008, 03:19 AM
HIM. Where are you, Zach, ole boy? I mean, besides over there where they don't speak my language?Sorry. I always liked his posts, I just forgot his gender. It has been a long time since he posted.

Bravo
02-16-2008, 03:19 AM
He tried lame line
I said ( quite truthfully at the time) My boyfriend is 6'4" and used to play for the England Under 21 rugby team
He says, Never mind, I've got a shotgun. Want a drink?



reminds me of a line i heard in the tv show the Wire a couple weeks ago.

the MC, mcnulty is hitting on this reporter.

she goes: i've got a boyfriend.

so he pulls his chair closer and goes: is he bigger than me?

Mr Flibble
02-16-2008, 03:25 AM
reminds me of a line i heard in the tv show the Wire a couple weeks ago.

the MC, mcnulty is hitting on this reporter.

she goes: i've got a boyfriend.

so he pulls his chair closer and goes: is he bigger than me?

*snickers*

and why did I ring this guy up?

Because he was the only one who answered that line of mine without running away :)

We're now married

The_Grand_Duchess
02-16-2008, 03:34 AM
My cabbie yesterday: "God put us on this earth so that we can connect conversationally, spiritually, and sexually. You are to young to get used to sleeping alone."

I think he went wrong with sexually. Although oddly enough a friend of mine said the same thing about sleeping alone today.

Death Wizard
02-16-2008, 04:01 AM
Is it hot in here or is it just you?