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HeronW
02-13-2008, 01:05 AM
MOSES' JEWISH MOTHER: "Desert, schmesert!! Where have you really been for the last forty years?"

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER: "After all the money your father and I spent on braces, this you call a smile?"

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER: "A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the walls, like the other children? Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?"

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call, you didn't write and you forgot my birthday!"

NAPOLEON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take your hand out of your jacket and show me!"

PAUL REVERE'S JEWISH MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young man, midnight is long past your bedtime!"

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"

THOMAS EDISON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off already and go to sleep!"

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Your senior photograph and you couldn't have done something with your hair?"

BILL GATES' JEWISH MOTHER: "It would have killed you to become a doctor?"

BILL CLINTON'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl, that Monica!"

davids
02-13-2008, 01:06 AM
my jewish mother-so David this is what i get for breastfeeding you and ruining THESE!!!

YOURS ARE BETTERER JUST WANTED TO ADD MY OWN LIFE STORY HERE-GOOD JEWISH LAD THAT I YAM!!!!

donroc
02-13-2008, 01:18 AM
Sort of donroc giveth and taketh for the femmes.

ADAM'S JEWISH MOTHER: "Oy, now I've created the daughter-inlaw from hell."

davids
02-13-2008, 01:22 AM
Seinfeld's mother looking down at him as a baby in his crib-not that there is anything wrong with that!!