Hi, Dani. My husband's mom was in a nursing home for a little over two years, eventually on the floor devoted to the care of Alzheimer's patients.
* Does each resident have their own television or do they share? If they share how do you decide what shows to watch?
The nursing home in which my mother in law spent her final years had several public-use TVs which were almost never on. Every resident either had his or her own, or no longer watched TV. Many who did still enjoy TV had some hearing loss, and their TVs were loud. My mother in law was unable to follow the plot of a simple sitcom and found TV confusing and frustrating.
* Does the nursing home have some sort of library? Yes, they do, but it's not very good. Given a couple hundred bucks and a month, I could produce a better one by visiting thrift stores. Nursing home residents who are still able to read (with both eyes and brain that allow it) are not the norm, though, so I don't think it matters much. They did have large-print Readers Digests out the wazoo, though I only recall one resident reading them.
* Does each resident get to choose what they bring from their previous home or do family members often make those choices for them? In my experience, no one was in the nursing home who was still capable of making his or her own decisions well or wisely. My husband and I chose what Mom had, and tried hard to make her room seem much like her home. Some patients were more lucid, and I imagine they helped select what they had in the nursing home.
* At what stage of Alzheimer's are people allowed to come to a nursing home? Allowed, I don't really know. It's horrifically depressing, and very expensive, so it's often a last resort, when a relative simply cannot be adequately cared for in their own, or your, home, even with the help of paid caregivers who bathe, dress, and such.
* At what stage do people usually come to a nursing home? They're in very bad shape mentally. We learned from the staff and other families that our situation wasn't unique. Many patients are there because they're so forgetful they've become a danger to themselves or others--forgetting stoves they've left on, unable to take medications as prescribed (often taking it again, having forgotten the first dose), or forgetting which side of the road to drive on. Many no longer recognized normal hygiene standards and didn't bathe or change their clothing. A few could no longer toilet themselves. (New verb!) My mother in law's signs included inability to deal with daily mail, with financial matters, and with locks. We found bags and bags of mail--including checks she relied on for her income--and she'd begun leaving her door unlocked 24/7.
* Do you have to take any test showing that you indeed have Alzheimer's? Are there even any tests that can say that you have Alzheimer's for sure? I don't know, sorry. We've got a few doctors around. Maybe one will see this thread.
* Are there medications for treating Alzheimer's and if there are does the nursing home provide those? The nursing home provides whatever medications the physician prescribes, the same way hospitals do. (Mom didn't take anything specific for her dementia, but this was about five years ago and things change.) There's no filling prescriptions at drugstores, then providing the drugs for the nursing home to dispense, at least not in New York. It frustrated us, because we could get better prices on some of what Mom took for various health problems.
Maryn, hoping this was of some help.