Rant: people suck sometimes

Sorry in advance to anyone who reads this; I'm hoping I'll feel slightly better when I'm done.

Just found out last night that my baby brother's girlfriend (one of the whiniest and least stable spice-girl types I've ever had the privilege of insulting) did what we've all more or less been afraid she'd do since she had his child a year ago. She took off. They're living together but were planning on moving to separate quarters next month; she got pregnant as a way to pressure him into marriage, he dodged that bullet but was trying to support her lazy ass, and they hate each other. (Yes, I know - it took two. But she admitted she stopped using the pill without telling him, and why she did that, and - ARGH. Whatever. Water under the bridge and all.)

But Saturday night, right after I left him to head back to ME, she demanded all sorts of money for child support, insisted he move out but pay for her apartment, and told him he'd only be able to see his daughter once a week. I dunno where she got those numbers, if she's got a lawyer, or if she was just trying to scare him into agreeing, but it sounds incredibly high to me. He said hell no, they argued, and she called her uncles, who came over, beat my little brother up, and took the baby. He hasn't seen his daughter for 4 days and can't get hold of her psycho-bitch mom. Being my brother, he didn't think to call his family and ask for help until last night.

I've been on the phone with lawyers since 7 last night trying to find someone who can help him. We have no idea where my niece is, my mom is freaking out, and one of my sisters is flying out there in a day to do - I have no idea what there is to do at this point. As far as I know he's filing for custody today, but I have no idea how he's going to pay for legal help; we're going to send him what we have, but I don't know if it'll be enough.




What a fucking mess.


Okay, at least I no longer want that cigarette.

Thanks, guys: reading your responses has made me feel better than I've felt since last night when I got this news.

I'm looking up the state code now. The first thing I told him to do after I got done swearing was to call the police, but he didn't want to: I'm going to bug him again right now and insist on it.

BM - I like it. I'm going with it.

Donna: yep, that's exactly what we're all worried about right now. She has no problem making things up when it suits her, and I have no doubt that's next on this shit list. Goddammit, I wish I hadn't left. My littlest sis is a force to be reckoned with, but she doesn't have my mean streak.

Hmmm, isn't it wonderful that I make things up for a maybe-one-day living...

(no, I know I can't, but I'm not above threatening it if I need to.)

Ok, calling my baby brother now....

It's killing me to sit on the sidelines and watch him get clobbered like this. And not to know where Phoebe (my niece) is.


Thanks again, folks. There are a few less knots in my neck now.

Update...

The situation is definitely improving: most of all because my brother got to see Phoebe last night for an hour, and now we know where she is. He hired a lawyer yesterday morning after I talked to him (blew every cent of his savings doing it, but we're all sending him as much as we can this weekend). The lawyer hired a PI on the spot, had him file for custody, report the assault and child-snatching (only for posterity, as I guess in CA if you wait more than 48 hours it's pointless, which I don't get at all - and apparently the posse she called to make this happen are listed as godparents, which muddies the waters considerably) and had her served that afternoon: which, combined with the fact that she ran out of money, scared her enough that she showed up on his doorstep whining and asking if they could make up.

He's got more self-restraint than I do. He said hell no, but he'd be willing to do mediation over a court scenario, so they're trying that. He also told her he'd be seeing his daughter at least 3 days a week, that she'd never get more than half of the money she asked for but he'd be happy to give her less if she pulled any tricks, and that she'd be paying for her own damn apartment. That she was going to bring Phoebe over immediately so he could see her, and that if she ever called her family over or took the baby away like that again he'd just call the police and let them deal with it. Meanwhile Phoebe is coming over again tonight. I would rather he had full custody (actually, I would rather his bitch ex just fell off the face of the planet) as I'm positive she'll pull this crap again, and I have no doubt the mediation will turn ugly, but he seems to have gotten a good grip on this situation, which is pretty impressive, IMO.

I just hope Phoebe can't remember this crap later; and that her mom doesn't use her as leverage. My baby brother is a good daddy, a concept I still have a hard time wrapping my head around.



Thanks for all the advice and good wishes, everyone. It meant a lot, and helped immensely. This is Phoebe. Ain't she cute?

Glad I'm not the only one who thinks so (besides her father, other aunts, and grandmother, that is). I've never seen a kid that young with so much hair! And she does this hilarious little "Awhoo?" Home Improvement noise when she wants to know what something is, which is what she was doing when this pic was taken.

Here's hoping her horrible mom doesn't mess her up. One of us is going to be flying out to CA every year for the next decade or so to help my brother out. My mom's even thinking of moving there; but she'd hate living in a city. I admit, I'm also thinking of it, though I'd probably hate it too.