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View Full Version : Rant alert: I am so effing angry right now...



scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 10:46 PM
...and ready to walk out of my job. No, really.

Forgive me for spewing it here, but I really need to get things off my chest. (No, seun; I don't mean my bra).

Okay, I started this new part-time, temporary job at the end of October. It was stressful at first as I didn't know where the stock went, how it was organised, but gradually picked things up and now I think I'm doing okay. Not only that but there are a lot of good people there with wicked senses of humour; really friendly and encouraging.

But there are always one or two bastard apples in every bunch. Or however the saying goes.

In 'my' department, when I first started, there was a 17-year-old girl and me (31) and the manager, who is seven years younger than me - how depressing! Anyway, he's a great guy; I really like him and have tons of respect for him. He's polite and articulate and very 'proper' without being a stick in the mud.

But the girl seems to be a problem. Or rather, she has a problem with me. I don't know if she's used to having complete autonomy over the department, or if she's pissed at another (older) woman coming to work with her or what...you see, our 'boss' used to be in meetings all the time, leave instructions, then pootle off to do whatever. And because I was the new girl, I said, "Just you let me know what's to be done and I'll get it done; you know this company better than I do," and the girl would give her orders...and check up on me...and keep checking up on me...and tell me to work faster...then check up on me again...and get on at me for being too slow...

At first I swallowed it, because, well...I'm 31 and she's a teenager. I don't like being spoken to like that by anyone, but if there's a 14-year age gap, I should take the moral high ground and be all mature about it because I'm supposed to be the grown-up about it.

However, one day I had a quiet whinge about her attitude to someone, who said, "You know why she's like that, don't you? She thinks she's her mother."

And I asked, "What's her mother got to do with it?"

And the woman I was speaking to said, "Her mother's one of the sales managers downstairs [in another department of the store]."

Ah. Explains a lot, including the "I'm the big I-am," attitude.

But there was a buffer between us in the form of our boss, a guy who used his gentle humour and calming influence to smooth things over between us - must have been hard for him, and my respect for him grew after witnessing his diplomacy.

And then he moved departments.

To work with this girl's mother, downstairs, leaving me and the daughter more or less working alone together.

***

Cut to this afternoon; me in the warehouse/loading bay. There's a rule that when the loading bay doors are being opened or closed, you need two people there; one to work, one to supervise, I guess. I don't know if it's a Health & Safety rule or what, but it's taken very seriously. If anyone opens the loading bay doors on their own, it's a sackable offence. It's that serious.

So I was the 'supervisor' while the doors were being opened this evening; remember the woman I mentioned earlier who explained the mother/daughter dynamic going on in the store? We'll call her C. C was outside working and the daughter from hell walked past, gave me a dirty look and disappeared.

C completed her job outside; my supervising was no longer needed; I returned to my hobbit-hole to get back to work. Ten minutes later I hear these clumping steps heading to the room I was in and the mother bursts in and demands, "Have you been standing at the back door?"

I looked at her in confusion, wondering where this had come from. So she asked the question again. And I said yes. C needed supervision while the doors were being opened and closed and deliveries were being taken. So she said in a bitchy voice with a real hard-faced expression, "You obviously haven't been here long but next time that happens, get someone else to supervise; we need a little more pace here." I started to say something but she said, "Nichola. I'm not going to argue with you," waved her hand in a 'talk to the-' gesture and just walked off.

It took a while for the penny to drop but daughter had obviously spied an opportunity to go running to mummy to bitch about me. It's probably connected to the fact the daughter asked me to do overtime this evening and I refused, saying I had plans. And I did. I do.

This is just the latest in a long line of incidents where I've felt like the daughter's pulling rank on me; a few other members of staff have said she's getting above herself because of who her mother is. It's as if she has an "I can't be sacked because of my mother," attitude.

So I fumed about it, even sat in the canteen letting off steam to a friend from childrenswear, who told me not to do anything foolish.

I fizzed on the bus home and I've decided to go in tomorrow to speak to another manager, even the store manager if he's in to explain my worries.

The crazy thing is, I get on with the men at work; the store manager, my former boss - the one who's seven years younger than me, other guys. And it's not a case of I flirted my way into the job; I'm just a very upfront person and don't like bitchiness or office politics, at which women seem to excel. It makes me ashamed to be female sometimes.

Perhaps at the bottom of it there's a kind of jealousy on the daughter's part? She sees me getting on with people, or just getting on with my work at my own pace, getting things done, not really allowing her to exert authority over me. Now please don't think I'm rude to people; it's just that I ask what needs to be done, and do it. I don't laugh and joke with the daughter because I don't have anything in common with her; she's 17 and into getting drunk at the weekend, spending time with her boyfriend, typical teenager things. She lives with her mum. I live on my own. I have bills to pay, other things to organise outside work and no parents to do everything for me.

C (from the warehouse/loading bay) advised me to speak to my new boss about it. She said, "Just tell him what's happened and that you feel you're being picked on because your face doesn't fit, or you think [the daughter] is taking a huff with you because you refused to do overtime so she went running to mummy."

Incidentally, it strikes me as a bit weird that Mummy spoke to in that way for two reasons: it's not at all professional...and she's the head of a completely different division. If there's any problem where I am, there's a boss to deal with it. It's like someone from childrenswear marching into the restaurant and giving someone a mouthful, or the store manager having a go at one of the cleaners because someone spilled something in the alcohol aisle - completely irrelevant and a case of "What the fuck has it got to do with you?"

Probably comes down to, "You said NO to my daughter so we're looking for reasons to pick on you now."

Anyway. Thanks for listening. I feel better for that rant, now.

*DEEP BREATH*

Sheryl Nantus
11-20-2007, 11:04 PM
take it to her superiors - you were following the rules and shouldn't be disciplined for doing YOUR JOB.

she shouldn't be anywhere near her daughter anyway - it's unprofessional to start with and I'm sure you're not the first one caught in the washback from this pair of idiots.

scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 11:07 PM
That's a good point. The daughter was moved from another department before because her mother took a supervisory position there and relatives are not allowed to work together.

The strange thing is, directly below the store manager are two sales managers, a married couple - lovely people, very professional, smiley, get the job done...and because they are married, they're not allowed to work on the same department. (The husband is my new boss). You'd never know they were married while they're on the shop floor, because they don't act like a married couple. They act like two managers, colleagues and entirely professional.

Plus, this woman I'm whinging about, the mother? She's got a fat arse.

dobiwon
11-20-2007, 11:09 PM
...
Anyway. Thanks for listening. I feel better for that rant, now. Your're welcome. :e2cookie: (have a cookie)

scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 11:16 PM
I wondered what you guys thought I should do about this - swallow it, or take it to someone who has the power to do something about it?

The way the store works is this: you have the store manager right at the top. Below him are five sales managers (one of whom is this fat-arsed motherbitch; another of whom is my direct superior).

Should I go to my boss who is equal to this woman and probably doesn't have the power to tell her off for giving me a mouthful, or should I go to the store manager, who DOES have the power to say, "Now look, you shouldn't speak to the staff like that and if your daughter has a problem, let it be dealt with by someone who actually works in that department."

Or would going straight to the top be overkill, do you think?

It just smacks of nepotism, really. Running to mummy and getting her to make the bad lady [me] stop doing her job, making her look bad...

Rolling Thunder
11-20-2007, 11:18 PM
Go to your boss so he/she isn't blind sided. Otherwise, you might have another snafu to deal with.

scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 11:19 PM
And of course he might then take it to the store manager, so I don't appear to be telling tales out of school, and The Mother can't blame me for grassing her up (but she probably will anyway).

Voyager
11-20-2007, 11:19 PM
A little perspective. You're a writer...and a damn good one. Being the daughter of a manager at some shit emporium for the rest of her life is all she has.

J. R. Tomlin
11-20-2007, 11:22 PM
You might want to watch picking up a gender biased attitude. You just admitted the female in the married couple was perfectly professional after going on about how horrible all other working women are. Just a heads up on how you're sounding. Don't let other people's problems turn you into someone you wouldn't like.

It is rough when you're put in that position. The only thing you can do is go to your supervisor. If you work for a temp company (you mentioned being a temp), it would be well to give your actual employer a word about what is going on. Unfortunately, you are in a position with relatively little power. The best you can do is try to get some people with power on your side.

Good luck!

WendyNYC
11-20-2007, 11:26 PM
Honestly, I doubt I'd talk to my supervisor about this, but I would make a note of it (write it down) and then bring it up if it happens again. It just doesn't seem like enough, and she could easiely explain it away and not get punished, or even a talking-to, about it. However, if it's a pattern, that's a different story.

I might be a bit jaded, however. I've worked with some very difficult people.

scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 11:26 PM
You might want to watch picking up a gender biased attitude. You just admitted the female in the married couple was perfectly professional after going on about how horrible all other working women are. Just a heads up on how you're sounding. Don't let other people's problems turn you into someone you wouldn't like.

It is rough when you're put in that position. The only thing you can do is go to your supervisor. If you work for a temp company (you mentioned being a temp), it would be well to give your actual employer a word about what is going on. Unfortunately, you are in a position with relatively little power. The best you can do is try to get some people with power on your side.

Good luck!

What I said was, both parties in this married couple are perfectly professional - I was making a point that working with a close relative doesn't always turn you into a power-crazed lunatic.

And regarding other women, my point was that - and I make no apologies for saying so - women excel at office politics. Going behind your back. Whereas in my experience, if a man has a problem with you, he'll tell you or smack your face, then it's all forgotten. I like that approach. Not this "I'm telling my mummy on you."

If you can't act like an adult, you shouldn't be in an adult's job.

And so I, in turn, feel bad for considering taking it higher. It feels like I'm telling tales now, but it has to be dealt with.

ottorino
11-20-2007, 11:43 PM
How about trying this approach:

Excuse me, supervisor, I'm baffled about something. The other day I was supervising C as she worked in the loading dock. Afterward, Mommy came and yelled at me for standing at the back door supervising C. I'm confused. Did I do something wrong?

scarletpeaches
11-20-2007, 11:44 PM
A very good point. I think I'll try that, ottorino.

ottorino
11-20-2007, 11:50 PM
Prego!

Sheryl Nantus
11-20-2007, 11:54 PM
exactly.

emphasize that you were doing WHAT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DO in regards to the loading bay.

it wasn't like BratGirl found you smoking in the bathroom - if you weren't there, stock could be stolen. Not to mention that they'd report you in a second if you hadn't been there.

and who knows - once they find out that they can't intimidate you, they may both back off. Sounds like the two shouldn't be in the same STORE, much less the same department.

akiwiguy
11-21-2007, 12:24 AM
This sounds like one of those typical work-place situations that you most likely won't ever resolve very satisfactorily. Unfortunately weird dynamics in workplaces is every day, and whether it has to be dealt with probably depends how you view your longer-term prospects there.

If you ARE looking at the longer-term and this is possibly affecting perfomance reviews etc., then yes you may have to confront the issue. If this is a job to earn money, maybe gain some experience before moving on then I would tend to "swallow it". Either way, I don't really think anything will change their attitudes. Even if they were say reprimanded, you're probably going to still have the same clash, maybe on a more subtle and devious level.

The one outcome that could perhaps be beneficial would be a change of job within that company. Would take a bit of thought and tact as to how and wth whom you approached that one.

Good luck though Nichola.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 12:28 AM
I'm only supposed to be there 'til the start of January anyway. You'd think people who are permanent members of staff would get over themselves.

I mean, it's a stressful time of year but just because I'm not having a nervous breakdown over how much work there is to do, doesn't mean I'm not professional about it. I do what needs to be done in the time for which I'm paid. Come 4pm, or 5pm, whenever I'm on the rota, I go. There's nothing so important at the store that it deserves to eat into my spare time like this.

And yet, here I am on AW, letting off steam again.

This job isn't the most important thing in my life. Writing always has been, always will be. Second only to that is my desire to know what love feels like. Thirdly, a possible move of location in the new year.

This job is way down the list.

III
11-21-2007, 12:36 AM
Ugh, that's what I hated about working Retail. You just brought back a flood of memories of doo-doo sandwiches I ate over the years. I'd like to say things'll get better, but there's always another pain-in-the-butt waiting to take the place of any one you get rid of. Unfairness seemed to be the hallmark of every retail store I worked in. To a large degree you just gotta deal with it. Breathe deep to keep your head clear. Think about something else and try not to focus on your anger, especially when it's building up inside you at work. Look at it as a learning experience. And pour yourself into your book so you don't have to work Retail if you don't want to.

And have a genuine Made In America hug :Hug2:

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 12:40 AM
:D Thanks, III. I knew I could count on you for some sensible, "Look after yourself and don't go killing anyone," advice!

Funny thing is, I was really stressing out when I first started there and now my attitude is, "I don't care any more. I don't need the job enough to sacrifice my self-esteem." I'm honestly past caring whether or not they sack me. (The friend I chatted to in the canteen said they wouldn't, but I'm just imagining the worst thing that could happen and asking myself, would it be so bad...?)

I could hang on for one more month or really take a shit-fit at the Mother who gave me a mouthful. Perhaps she was stressed. Well, I know she was. But I always say there's never any excuse for rudeness. And in this instance, she had no business being on my department. It was clearly a case of the daughter pulling rank to get me in trouble because mummy works in the same shop.

It's pathetic really, that she can't work on her own and needs her mother to hold her hand, but then some of us have grown up and don't have a mummy to do our dirty work for us. :rolleyes:

seun
11-21-2007, 12:42 AM
That was longest rant I've read in a while. Did writing it down help?

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 12:44 AM
A little bit. I just want it dealt with now. Things like this always happen the day before my day off, or the day before I get a lie in/late shift/night shift. It ruins my ability to relax at home.

I just want the job to stop using up my headspace when I'm away from the store and don't know why I can't switch off.

dpaterso
11-21-2007, 12:45 AM
Picture the scene, years ago, my first week at work. Big factory and office complex, 2,000 employees. Chaos and bedlam, department wars, little Hitlers strutting around everywhere giving conflicting orders. Somehow, despite all odds, units actually got shipped to customers.

So I notice this rough-looking guy, who's been drafted into my area for a day to help clear a huge backlog, is watching me. I'm swamped with work, arms whirling like an octopus on speed, and still there's more piling up all around me. He ambles over (I thought he was going to stab me) and says, "This is the best advice you'll ever hear in your life. Don't take your work home with you. Doesn't matter how shit your day goes, you walk out that door, just stop thinking about it."

I never saw him again, so I never got the chance to thank him -- because he was dead right, it was the best advice I ever heard. Over the years I saw people around me driven to madness and beyond by work pressure. They were the ones who drove straight to the pub after work, or went off on the sick and never came back, or keeled over with heart attacks.

Best advice you'll ever hear in your life. Doesn't matter how shit your day goes, you walk out that door, just stop thinking about it.

-Derek

Stew21
11-21-2007, 12:48 AM
Derek is right. (God, I can't believe I just said that. Don't let it go to your head, big guy.)

Also remember that no matter where you work, there's going to be some real pricks to deal with. Every office environment has it's share of b.s. Finding a job you like is mostly a matter of which place has bullshit you can tolerate the most.

hang in there.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 12:50 AM
How?

That's an honest-to-goodness question. I'll admit to being a born worrier. I learned it from my mother, may she rot in hell (if she's dead...I dunno...anyhoo...)

Now I know earlier I said I've reached the point where I don't give a toss any more, and it's true. While I'm there, I think, "I don't need the job so badly to allow myself to be spoken to like this," because I'm in the midst of the anger. The white-hot, I'm gonna kill someone phase.

By the time I get home, it's cooled to a less raging anger. I'm pissed off still, but distance gives the 'what ifs' a chance to creep in. What if this happens...what if that happens...

When I'm in the eye of the storm, it's like I think, "This is as bad as it gets. They push you any further, walk out."

When I'm at home, I have distance, and perspective...and strangely enough, that's when the worry starts.

WendyNYC
11-21-2007, 01:03 AM
Best advice you'll ever hear in your life. Doesn't matter how shit your day goes, you walk out that door, just stop thinking about it.

-Derek


I think men can be better at departmentalizing things like this than women, but Derek is right. Learning to Let It Go is a great skill.

Esopha
11-21-2007, 01:03 AM
God. Fucking teenagers.

Tell her to grow up.

;)

Seriously, though, if she doesn't learn that she can't go running off to mom for every little thing, she's getting nowhere in life. Do her a favor and let her (and her mom, who's obviously terrified of the apron strings being cut) deal with the consequences of being a poo.

She has to learn sooner or later.

Think of it as a gift of wisdom between the generations.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 01:04 AM
I just realised. I'm probably closer in age to the mother than the daughter.

This tickles me.

It just goes to show, growing older is inevitable. Growing up is not.

Unique
11-21-2007, 01:19 AM
..women excel at office politics. Going behind your back. Whereas in my experience, if a man has a problem with you, he'll tell you or smack your face, then it's all forgotten. I like that approach. Not this "I'm telling my mummy on you."


Wish I didn't have to agree with you here but more or less that's been my experience as well.

Well, except for the sexual harrassment but ... that's another problem entirely.


How about trying this approach:

Excuse me, supervisor, I'm baffled about something. The other day I was supervising C as she worked in the loading dock. Afterward, Mommy came and yelled at me for standing at the back door supervising C. I'm confused. Did I do something wrong?

That gets my vote. 'You want sneaky and underhanded? you ... person ... 'watch a pro'. heh. (I'll be watching you, ottorino, for more sage advice.) :D




Now I know earlier I said I've reached the point where I don't give a toss any more, and it's true. While I'm there, I think, "I don't need the job so badly to allow myself to be spoken to like this,"



been there, done that. quit jobs that I really liked ... but now ... probably not so likely. Why? Because I'm not being pushed out of my job that I like because of an asshole anymore.

I hate conflict. I'd rather walk away. But Skippy, I'm not giving up any more jobs that I really enjoy and that I'm good at because other people are jealous of me. They have the problem, not me. And I'm not taking on their problems. What I've decided is to give them 'the look' (the one that says 'are you speaking English? just totally blank. okay, whatever - and go on about my business AND cover my backside like ottorino said. It's puts the onus on them and makes you look good because you're asking - not telling.

I love sneaky. I wish this wasn't happening to you because you don't need it and you don't deserve it.

A pox on them!:rant:

Stew21
11-21-2007, 01:25 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by scarletpeaches
..women excel at office politics. Going behind your back. Whereas in my experience, if a man has a problem with you, he'll tell you or smack your face, then it's all forgotten. I like that approach. Not this "I'm telling my mummy on you."

Wish I didn't have to agree with you here but more or less that's been my experience as well.


I have also experienced a great deal of this. thankfully, though, where I work now, I don't have that problem. amazing that this may be the first time I have worked with so many cool women.

WendyNYC
11-21-2007, 01:30 AM
How about trying this approach:

Excuse me, supervisor, I'm baffled about something. The other day I was supervising C as she worked in the loading dock. Afterward, Mommy came and yelled at me for standing at the back door supervising C. I'm confused. Did I do something wrong?


But don't you think Mommy will just say "Hey, she was being slow. I just called her out on it. It has nothing to do with my daughter." Then Nicola will look like she's either a malcontent or a delicate flower. I still think she needs more than one example. But that's just my $.02.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 01:31 AM
If I speak to one of the higher-ups, I might look like a grass.

And if I don't, it'll get worse, especially now that the mother is involved as well as the daughter.

thethinker42
11-21-2007, 02:25 AM
I think men can be better at departmentalizing things like this than women, but Derek is right. Learning to Let It Go is a great skill.

You guys are absolutely right, but it is definitely easier said than done...and I think you might be onto something that it's easier for men than women.

I totally know how Nichola feels with this, and I wish I had some worthwhile advice. When I worked in retail, I routinely went home wanting to claw my eyeballs out, and then ended up DREAMING about my job (when I could sleep...which wasn't often...). I spent two years in purgatory retail before moving into the second level of hell customer service.

So Nichola, if I can offer you any words of wisdom...Derek is right about trying to let it go if you can, but otherwise, just know that retail sucks across the board, you're not alone, and and you're not crazy: your co-worker really is an asshat who needs to be slapped. I know you, and I know that just telling you "don't worry about it" isn't going to do any good, but do try to tell yourself that you're doing your job properly, and if the sniveling little buttmunch keeps it up, sooner or later, she'll get hers. And hopefully, it won't be on your day off, because I promise you, you'll want to watch. :D

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 02:26 AM
I can't believe I'm about to ask Lori for serious advice, but here goes:

I don't want to be the whiny, complaining new girl but would you go to your direct superior if you were me? To put your side of the story before it escalates?

After you've answered, you may resume ripping on me as per usual.

Chumplet
11-21-2007, 02:34 AM
How about keeping a log of your work activities and finished duties as assigned? If they try to pin the 'lazy worker' dealio on you, you might have some ammunition.

I was in the very same situation years ago when I was in my mid-twenties. It was a graphics shop and the 'manager' was the owner's daughter. She was about 19 and was a total bitch. If I didn't do a piece of artwork correctly, she'd belt out in her loudest voice, "Wrong!" She sounded like a gong.

I lasted about three months, after having stomach aches every day. But I made sure I had another job to go to first.

WendyNYC
11-21-2007, 02:36 AM
What is the overall environment like? Do they tolerate people being snippy with one another? Are the supervisors snippy? Or is it kinder and gentler? I think it makes a huge difference in what you should do. At my old job (advertising--eons ago), the environment had a tough edge. People cursed. Egos flamed up. You dealt with it. But not all atmospheres are full of snarky people, I do recognize that.

WendyNYC
11-21-2007, 02:38 AM
If I didn't do a piece of artwork correctly, she'd belt out in her loudest voice, "Wrong!" She sounded like a gong.
.


How obnoxious. And painfully dorky.

thethinker42
11-21-2007, 02:45 AM
I don't want to be the whiny, complaining new girl but would you go to your direct superior if you were me? To put your side of the story before it escalates?

YES. Absolutely. My approach has always been, "I don't think I'm quite jiving with so-and-so. Since you know her better than I do, do you have any pointers? Is there anything I could be doing differently?" This way I'm not starting the conversation with "So-and-so is being a bitch..." This has been VERY effective at getting my boss' attention that someone's treating me like shit WITHOUT me coming across as "SO-AND-SO IS BEING MEAN!!!" (But I'm kinda passive-aggressive when it comes to conflict, so that's just me).


After you've answered, you may resume ripping on me as per usual.

Oh good! Then I will e-mail you right away about my weekend with the Wackelganger...

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 02:46 AM
YES. Absolutely. My approach has always been, "I don't think I'm quite jiving with so-and-so. Since you know her better than I do, do you have any pointers? Is there anything I could be doing differently?" This way I'm not starting the conversation with "So-and-so is being a bitch..." This has been VERY effective at getting my boss' attention that someone's treating me like shit WITHOUT me coming across as "SO-AND-SO IS BEING MEAN!!!" (But I'm kinda passive-aggressive when it comes to conflict, so that's just me).

Thanks for that.


Oh good! Then I will e-mail you right away about my weekend with the Wackelganger...

And I will email you about some saucy exchanges I had with a 20-year-old co-worker this afternoon- oh. What? Did I say that in public? Ne'ermind.

thethinker42
11-21-2007, 02:50 AM
Thanks for that.

Anytime.


And I will email you about some saucy exchanges I had with a 20-year-old co-worker this afternoon- oh. What? Did I say that in public? Ne'ermind.

Go ahead. You know I'll win this one.

AnnieColleen
11-21-2007, 02:58 AM
I'm a supervisor, albeit not in retail. I would absolutely want to know if someone not in my department was telling one of my temps to do something other than normal.

I like the idea to approach it as "Was I doing what I was supposed to?" or maybe something along the lines of "Does watching the doors when it's needed take priority over my other work, or is there someone else who should handle it so I can keep the pace?"

We're having similar issues in my office with one particular project. We were originally told it would be a one-person project...it wasn't, at all. So we changed the assignments. But the original one person still tries to handle things herself, or go after various people on my team when things don't move to her satisfaction, and others on her team are picking up the same bad habits. To the point where we've told them no direct communication between teams, and told my team to flag infractions to me or my boss every time it happens. Then either I can go after the poachers or my boss can.

It does help to have it phrased as a question about process or priorities, since that's easier to address than office politics or tone. But the only complaints I don't want to hear are when the person complaining doesn't have the facts straight so that I have to take time to track down something that didn't happen as reported.

Hope it gets worked out somehow!

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 03:03 AM
...Go ahead. You know I'll win this one.

We talked about porn and dinkle-tattooes.

WittyandorIronic
11-21-2007, 04:13 AM
I might have missed it, but is this teenager actually in your chain of command, or simply has assumed that mien based on her 'permanent' status, her mother, and you nicely asking for assistance when you first started?
If she is then be very careful to go only one supervisor above her.
If she isn't then you could let your new boss (who should be neutral due to a lack of previous association, right?) know that you originally asked the girl for assistance due to a newness that has now worn off. The need for mentorship has passed and you would like assistance in agreeably disbanding the relationship. I would suggest you do so ONLY if you are sure her impressions of your productivity are truly incorrect.
Good luck!

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 04:20 AM
There IS no supervisor above her, apart from our boss. We are both 'sales advisors'; our boss is a 'sales manager' and above him there is only the store manager. So her boss and my boss are the same person.

This girl isn't anywhere above me in the chain of command; she's just been there longer. She's 14 years younger than me, yes...but her mother is a sales manager; the same rank as our new boss, though the mother is in cahrge of another, separate department of the store.

The girl probably thinks she can pull rank based on her mother being quite high up in the company. "You can't touch me; mummy will punish you," kinda thing.

nerds
11-21-2007, 04:43 AM
AnnieColleen made some very good points from a supervisor's p.o.v. upthread. It's the crossing departments that I think is key, here, and benefits your side of things. MonsterMom has betrayed her motivations by coming into your department and interfering. That will be obvious to anyone else there. Management does not like that sort of thing, and good management wants to know when it happens. You've gotten much good advice here, and good luck with whatever you decide to do or not do.

thethinker42
11-21-2007, 05:48 AM
We talked about porn and dinkle-tattooes.

I think you know what my weekend entailed. I shall not go into anymore detail publicly, lest I be banninated.

xhouseboy
11-21-2007, 05:57 AM
Going to your supervisor, whilst perhaps the correct thing to do, won't resolve the underlying issue.

It's a pecking order deal. You've disrupted it.

It will only settle down when she no longer feels threatened by you.

Ziljon
11-21-2007, 06:17 AM
Sounds like Ass-Hat has a mother named Ass-Finger.

This is one of those times that I wish, I wish, this forum was not just written, but available in audio as well, so I could listen to the whole thing in the car driving home.

What I wouldn't give to here KTC speaking the quote above, not to mention all of Scarlet's rant, in what I imagine to be a most fetching Scottish brogue.

When's this forum going audio, Mac? It's the future!

Chumplet
11-21-2007, 06:42 AM
Hell, we could submit it as a comedy-drama script and be scabs. Sorry, script writers. I wasn't serious. Really.

seun
11-21-2007, 02:21 PM
He ambles over (I thought he was going to stab me) and says, "This is the best advice you'll ever hear in your life. Don't take your work home with you. Doesn't matter how shit your day goes, you walk out that door, just stop thinking about it."
Best advice you'll ever hear in your life. Doesn't matter how shit your day goes, you walk out that door, just stop thinking about it.

-Derek

I'll second this. And add to it with advice an old workmate gave me during my record shop days.

"Whatever's said between nine and six doesn't count after work. Now make me a cup of tea, you bald bastard."

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 05:50 PM
It's easy to say 'don't let it bother you after you go home', but you're not the ones working to pay my rent.

nerds
11-21-2007, 06:09 PM
scarlet, I'm wondering, too, if workplace backlash is figuring into your concerns? Is this nasty girl the type to make your daily worklife worse if you speak up? That would be something to factor into the mix, I would think.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Workplace junk is miserable. When it's bad, it can certainly eat into one's headspace at home. Any other jobs available out there for you?

Print out Voyager's post in big colorful type and put it in a prominent spot on your wall - someday you'll be an Author, and all mother/daughter will ever have is the shoe department. Or whatever department. I feel for the inevitable endless string of future victims who will have to deal with them.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 06:14 PM
I really did consider walking out yesterday but it was so near to the end of my shift that I stayed on! The daughter asked me to do an extra hour and I refused, which is where I think all this comes from, but I don't drop everything at the last minute and change my plans for anyone.

I felt proud of myself that I'd got to the stage of thinking, "I don't need the job this badly. I won't allow anyone to disrespect me like this," but soon realised if I did walk out, I'd be playing into their hands.

I'll speak to my boss about it at the first opportunity (even though this is the busiest week of the year; the sale's just started so I doubt my boss will have five minutes to spare until next week) and keep telling myself, "You've only got to hang on until the 5th January. That's a matter of weeks away."

But it's still good that I've reached the point where I say to myself, "You don't need this job. They need you more."

Honestly, I think if I walked out they'd be screwed. If they're so busy one of the managers is giving me cheek, even because of stress, then that shows how mad things are on the shop floor. But it still doesn't excuse her lack of manners.

julie thorpe
11-21-2007, 07:43 PM
Scarletpeaches, you are letting this kid and her mother pull your strings. You're giving them power over you. You're all riled up and getting in a state yet you know you have behaved correctly and have nothing to answer for. My advice (and I'm not saying it will be easy) is to ignore them and deprive them of the satisfaction of knowing they can get to you. Petty bullies love to feel they have scored. If you deny them the satisfaction, if you behave as though their nonsense is not worth noticing, you will have won. If you react, get upset, defend yourself, etc etc, they have won, and will no doubt try again. . . you are the mature one in that set-up. don't let them provoke you into reacting at their level. You're a strong person, we all know that. Give them the mental fingers and get on with your infinitely more interesting life--and feel pity for them. Just my 2 cents' worth.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 07:46 PM
But if I don't do anything about it I'll feel as if I'm giving them the green light to carry on with their behaviour, possibly even bullying someone else who isn't as articulate or ready to defend herself as I am.

Unique
11-21-2007, 07:49 PM
She's right. But so are you.

By all means, do something. But think, my dear grasshopper. Plot. Plan.

Revenge is a dish best served cold. And sweet.

Ask Jaycinth. bwahahahahaha...........

julie thorpe
11-21-2007, 07:54 PM
In the end, your responsibility is to yourself. You haven't got to worry about these two and their machinations; that is the manager's job, so if they pull it on someone else that is still not your responsibility. In your situation you do not have to be your brother's keeper, only your own. Any response on your part is dancing to their tune. You can't afford to give them that power over you!

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 07:57 PM
There's no way I'd ever agree with that attitude. I am my brother's keeper. If we all took that attitude, that "How they treat other people is no concern of mine," the world would be a far more selfish place and bullies like this girl and her mother would flourish. I like to think if this was happening to someone else they would look out for me, or other potential victims of bullying.

julie thorpe
11-21-2007, 08:37 PM
I guess I must have expressed myself badly. Yes, I too believe we all have a moral duty to look out for one another. But in the situation you describe, you are faced with a personal choice: react to their manipulation, or appear to ignore it. I agree, if a similar situation happens to others then by all means alert your manager, and you will have corroborating evidence to back your case. By doing nothing in the meantime and appearing to take no notice of their power plays, you are calling their bluff - and preserving your own dignity. There is no weakness--or selfishness-- in refusing to allow them to exert power over you; on the contrary, there is strength. And that will better fit you for helping others.

Jean Marie
11-21-2007, 10:23 PM
Use the twit for future character reference/development, is my suggestion and talk to your supervisor in the interim. That way, you make the rest of your stay there, as pleasant as possible.

NeuroFizz
11-21-2007, 10:32 PM
Post this by your workspace--see if she gets it:

Fly High, Hybris

Fiercest Hybris,
of graven hubris,
so much easier
to rise above those
you push down,
than to soar
among them.

scarletpeaches
11-21-2007, 10:47 PM
Thanks everyone; I knew posting my rant on AW would be a great help. I leave for my night shift in a couple of hours and the good news is the daughter won't be there. Due to her being under 18, there are laws against her working so late, so I won't have her to worry about until next week. I have a night, two lates and two days off before I have to see her again.

The mother? Well, she might work late, but she's on a different department. Of course, she now likes to cross dept boundaries as we know, but the more she does that, the more evidence I'll have to prove my point.

A few guys I get on with are on tonight, so it should help the time pass - being with your workmates as opposed to your workenemies usually does!

CatSlave
11-21-2007, 10:47 PM
Plus, this woman I'm whinging about, the mother? She's got a fat arse.
Don't EVER take crap from a woman with a fat arse.

And remember, experience and treachery will always overcome youth and stupidity. :e2teeth:

writerterri
11-21-2007, 10:49 PM
Give that silly little girl a little back. You're older than her reguardless if her mother is there. Let her know you wont take her nonsense and I'll bet she backs off. If not, that's not the only job in town.

Sorry you have to go through this. I had a bit of it myself last week. I just ignored the girl when she gave me orders. Eventually she left me alone.

skelly
11-22-2007, 02:14 AM
It's easy to say 'don't let it bother you after you go home', but you're not the ones working to pay my rent.
No, we're working to pay our own rents. If you can't get past it then go upside the bitch's head. Both of them. Is that the only job in your area?

Jean Marie
11-22-2007, 05:15 AM
Have a good nightshift, Nichola.

crazynance
11-22-2007, 07:45 AM
Scarlett - Sheryl and Ottorino have it, for the win. Definitely don't bypass the chain of command. You wouldn't even have to mention the Who of who was involved. Just " Just curious, we ARE supposed to supervise when opening the bay doors??? Any exceptions?? No. A manager gave me heck for that... "
which leads him to wonder who is poaching in his department... Ahhh! I feel a plot coming on.. Thanks, Scarlett! O! how like writing life can be. [Look! Use of Vocative!]

scarletpeaches
11-22-2007, 08:06 PM
No, we're working to pay our own rents. If you can't get past it then go upside the bitch's head. Both of them. Is that the only job in your area?

It's the only one I've got. It's a myth that you can just leave one job and walk straight into another. For a start, any new employer will want to know why I left my previous one and there's a gap between pay days where I'd have to pay the rent with thin air. There's no such thing as a job for life any more.

Ziljon
11-22-2007, 08:08 PM
So what happened last night?

scarletpeaches
11-22-2007, 08:14 PM
The mother and daughter weren't on, so woo-hoo!! Tonight I start just as the daughter finishes. I'm on until midnight, taxi home, paid for by my workplace. Tomorrow when I work late there's an overlap of two hours between me and the daughter; as for the mother, I haven't a clue when she's on. But because it's all so up in the air regarding when my boss is in, when I'm in, when I'll get a chance to speak, I'll wait until Monday and say something then. It'll give me cooling-down time, and by then I'll be able to decide rationally how to handle it.

Meanwhile, lots of lovely young men to flirt with work to do! :D

Unique
11-22-2007, 08:20 PM
Meanwhile, lots of lovely young men to flirt with work to do! :D

i told you. cold and sweet. living well is its own revenge.

You GO girl!

scarletpeaches
11-22-2007, 08:21 PM
I feel so wrong. But so very, very right! :e2brows:

SC Harrison
11-22-2007, 08:43 PM
Meanwhile, lots of lovely young men to flirt with work to do! :D

I think you've probably nailed down the issue right here.

Retail outlets (and restaurants) are fertile ground for workplace romances. If this chick (the daughter) has had her eyes on any of these guys you're flirting with, and they're paying her less attention now since you began working there, she probably considers you a threat to her "living happily everafter" fantasy.

It always pays to do an analysis of "who's been doing who" or "who wants to do who" when you're new to a place. I had a two-week fling with a female coworker once, only to find out later that it broke up a 3 year engagement in the process. It was probably for the best all around, but I felt like a total ass for a long time after.

scarletpeaches
11-22-2007, 08:53 PM
She has a boyfriend so morally she shouldn't feel put out.

And believe you me, any chatting I do to workmates, male or female, is strictly at break time or when the workload has eased somewhat, so no-one can say I'm wasting work time for chatting people up. And I've never been the overtly flirtatious type; I just chat to people, get to know them. It's something I seem to do easily, when I feel comfortable with someone.

But then, it could just be the simple matter of another female encroaching on her territory, whether she's partnered-up or not. It doesn't seem to stop her flirting with men at work.

Unique
11-22-2007, 08:57 PM
some chicks are stupid, scarlet. you know that.

she could be yer bud.

'Hey, I can't do 'em all and neither can you. Let's compare'
Hell. Why not?

JimmyB27
11-22-2007, 09:10 PM
I think you should piss in her coffee.

scarletpeaches
11-22-2007, 09:35 PM
Oh yes. I'll just jump on the table in the canteen and squat over her Starbucks! :ROFL: One lump or two?

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 05:53 AM
Quick update: ran into the mother when I arrived this evening and she was perfectly pleasant to me, all polite, like we hadn't had our previous conversation. I say 'conversation' but it was all one-sided; her ranting at me. Hmm. Dunno what to make of that. I could put it down to her having a bad day but on the other hand, it might be symptomatic of a volatile temper.

Anyway. The daughter was finishing just as I got there and she carried on with her, "You have to do this and you need to do that," routine.

I've just realised what I object to. We're supposed to be a team in our department, and it's always "You have to do this;" no "We should do this," or "We need to do that."

If any of that makes sense. Sorry. I've just done an overnight shift, and a late one this evening. Me is tired.

Voyager
11-23-2007, 05:54 AM
But she lives, so you done good

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 05:57 AM
I'm still glad I started this thread, though, even if this work situation comes to nothing. It helped to let off steam and I got a lot of good advice.

And can I just say, it's a very good-looking store where I work...:D

Ziljon
11-23-2007, 06:03 AM
Is there any co-worker in particular that you have your dark-adapted eyes on?

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 06:04 AM
You may think so, but I couldn't possibly comment. :rolleyes:

Ziljon
11-23-2007, 06:06 AM
Do any of them know you have an AW persona?

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 06:06 AM
AW is my dirty little secret, all warm and moist, like.

Unique
11-23-2007, 06:07 AM
I've just realised what I object to. We're supposed to be a team in our department, and it's always "You have to do this;" no "We should do this," or "We need to do that."

yes! excly!

May I, might I, will you, could you, please won't you ... whatever.

ask me, i probably will. tell me, i probably won't. do it right, i'll to anticipate and we needn't talk much after that. (but only if you're my boss) {insert proper salute here}

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 06:11 AM
Well at least tomorrow I'm on from 5pm-midnight, then I have two days off. Sadly I have an assignment to take care of which will mean less free time than I'd like, but it's writing, so I can even stay in bed if I want! My old boss scheduled me in for a weekend off to recover from the nightshift and two lates...lovely man; other people have three night shifts and only one day off to recover. If he wasn't a friend of Dorothy's [I think], I'd suspect he liked me, ho ho! :e2brows: I can charm my way into time off without even trying, it seems!

There are a couple of people in 'my' department I get on with really well; I'd like to carry on seeing them as friends once my contract runs out.

And I need to pay the rent. Boo. :( As has been said before, whatever happens, it's all fiction novel material. :D

Pamster
11-23-2007, 07:04 PM
I bet you feel better having pinpointed the real root of what's bothering you about this situation. I can fully appreciate that feeling of being treated like an underling by someone who's meant and hired as an equal. It totally makes sense that you'd feel irked by all this, "You have to, you need to...." stuff when it should be "We need to, and We have to..." That makes a lot of sense Scarlet. Hope you have a great weekend. :)

scarletpeaches
11-23-2007, 07:08 PM
I am just straightening my hair with my new GHDs before heading in for my 5pm-midnight shift. One needs to look gorgeous for work, you know. :D ;) :e2brows:

oswann
11-23-2007, 08:01 PM
I've just realised what I object to. We're supposed to be a team in our department, and it's always "You have to do this;" no "We should do this," or "We need to do that."

If any of that makes sense. Sorry. I've just done an overnight shift, and a late one this evening. Me is tired.


It makes perfect sense because the young girl is not a manager's arsehole. I have learned over many years of having responsibility thrust upon me eventually how to manage people (I was bossing around about sixty people before I quit to start my own business). Everything you are describing does not correspond to good management. I'm sure you would make a good manager, if that's any consolation.

Os.

Unique
11-23-2007, 08:07 PM
I bet you feel better having pinpointed the real root of what's bothering you about this situation.

this thread has been neurolinguistic programming, applied. i think.

:Trophy::e2thud:

pick one.

scarletpeaches
11-24-2007, 05:13 AM
On a completely unrelated turn of events...

Oh yes. La Peche Rouge? She's still got it. :e2brows:

Joe270
11-24-2007, 07:46 AM
I know the days have passed, but for future use:

Technically, the other supervisor (fat ass) stepped outta line chastising you. That implies that your boss was negligent in supervising you. That is a professional slight against your boss which he would not appreciate.

He should have been told, as Thunder suggested. But, under no circumstances, mention your belief that the daughter started it all. That is speculation and smacks of gossip.

Let the Fat Ass Behatch mention that her daughter came to her with the problem. Then your supervisor will be royally ticked about that, too. The daughter should have gone to him, not her mom.


Point two, if you can't leave the work at work, then you must vent that negativity. You can take up boxing or you can get even in devious ways.

Suggestion: fill out all the magazine card offers you can find with the 17 year olds name, address, etc., especially the credit card offers. I was very successful with this tactic twice, rather enjoying the tales of woe when the jackasses got into financial hot water.

Paybacks are a bitch. If you want to get meaner, pm me, I got a few. Too bad you don't live in the states, the IRS is a real pain in the ass. . .

scarletpeaches
11-24-2007, 07:52 AM
I've decided to go for the girly approach.

You know, spending 135 on GHD straighteners, showing up with makeup on, hair looking perfect, skoosh on some perfume, give the hunkiest workers the glad-eye.

If attention is her oxygen, she's about to be asphyxiated, 'cause I'm having it!

arodriguez
11-24-2007, 12:30 PM
dont forget to drop your pencil..and bend..and snap!

scarletpeaches
11-24-2007, 07:19 PM
Not much point; you have to wear trousers to work...but never mind, it's all good. The GHD-effect is in full flow.

One of the permanent members of staff said to me last night, "Usually the Christmas temps are bitchy women or ugly looking guys, but the standard's really high this year; they're all really good-looking."

So, being a Christmas temp myself, I thanked her. :D

paprikapink
11-24-2007, 09:04 PM
...

This job isn't the most important thing in my life. Writing always has been, always will be. Second only to that is my desire to know what love feels like. Thirdly, a possible move of location in the new year.

This job is way down the list.

I wanna see this plot-line developed. Thirty-one is a good age for a major shake-up.

shakeysix
11-24-2007, 10:01 PM
in education we call what mommy dearest did going outside the chain of command. like a teacher chewing out a lunch lady for not wearing a hairnet.
i have worked retail and going outside the chain is a big no-no even in retail because it is counterproductive. that woman had a job to do and neglected it to chew someone out who was not even in her department.

document this--just keep a desk calendar or an agenda and jot down this one and wait for another to happen. if it doesn't you are ahead. if it does you are ahead. then go to your soop and report it, or to your soop's soop.

while you are at it you might want to keep notes on baby girl's drinking stories and see if they line up with absences or her being late. if'n you want to be real bitchy. rants usually cool off in a day or two but a couple of well documented complaints will still be considered long after you are gone in january. the gift that keeps on giving--s6

scarletpeaches
11-27-2007, 10:31 PM
Whinging update: The supervisors in this place haven't got a fucking clue how to speak to people. They really let you know you're the bottom rung of the ladder. And you know the crazy thing? The store manager himself, the top guy, le grande fromage? He's as polite a gentleman as you can hope for. It's the middle management bastards who have Hitler complexes.

Apologies for the swears. I'm just so sick of this job. Apart from the fact my new best friend on one of the cosmetics counter took my number to pass on to someone else. :e2brows:

And it's payday on Friday.

And Friday is the first of my FOUR CONSECUTIVE DAYS OFF.

After which I'm on late shifts which means I get a lie-in for those following four back shifts.

:D

WendyNYC
11-27-2007, 10:45 PM
Sometimes the polite ones let the jerks do their dirty work. Just something I've noticed over the years.

Sorry it's not going so well.

scarletpeaches
11-27-2007, 10:51 PM
I just have to keep telling myself, "It's a temporary job, but you've made permanent friends out of it."

WendyNYC
11-27-2007, 10:53 PM
I just have to keep telling myself, "It's a temporary job, but you've made permanent friends out of it."


That's a good way to look at it.

Psst....I met my husband at a temp job.

scarletpeaches
11-27-2007, 10:54 PM
Oh really? :e2brows: Interesting.

WendyNYC
11-27-2007, 10:54 PM
Yes, I'm a living cliche. I was his temp secretary. At least he wasn't married.

scarletpeaches
11-27-2007, 10:59 PM
I'm no-one's secretary. :(

But on the up side, I went back in to work after I finished (you have to exit the staff door and walk aaaaall the way round to the 'customer' entrance if you want to do any shopping) to chat to m'chum on cosmetics. Ended up yapping for an hour. And I've only known her properly for a week! Still she offered to colour in my face whenever I wanted...say if I had a night out, or wanted to impress someone, or just fancied looking smexy.

I think every woman needs a friend who's in cosmetics. I like it when you meet someone and you just 'click'. We've even started developing our own code/language. Some women are like that. I've rarely experienced it with men, though. Only a few times.

So I'm trying to look on the bright side. One or two arseholes, a few good girlfriends, lots of hunky men, and payday on Friday.

*sigh*

eodmatt
11-27-2007, 11:19 PM
A very interesting thread this, the more so because it's "live" and not historical. As former senior manager myself I have to say that, for all that your senior manager is urbane and pleasant, he is not in touch with the reality of what is happening on his shop floor. Somehow he needs to be brought up to date in a non confrontational and non polemical way. Others have offered sage advice regarding what to do about it and, in the main, I concur. However your problem is how to go about it. And this needs a degree of diplomacy. I would hesitate to advise you on exactly how to approach the personality of the manager, since I am not aware of the dynamics of the department concerned. However: Revenge is a dish best relished cold. The remedy to your situation will be your revenge. So the resolving of the situation lies in calm discussion with management. A dispassionate examination of the facts, with the accent on improving departmental efficiency and your desire to improve matters to the benefit of all.

The reality is that the girl and her mother are probably already a pain in the arse generally and their familial dynamics probably noted by management but tolerated as, so far, as there has been no appreciable rocking of the inter departmental boat.

What, between them, they have done so far is indicative of simple bullying and this is not an intellectual activity. If you use your intellect and a bit of basic psychology, you can defeat them.

The Chinese have a proverb: "If you sit by the river long enough, the bodies of your enemies will float past you."

This will happen more quickly if you have them assassinated a short distance upstream of where you sit.

scarletpeaches
12-05-2007, 01:56 AM
Today work was marvellous. Nay, splendid. In fact, wondrous in the extreme. I wish you all love and happiness. :D

scarletpeaches
12-05-2007, 01:59 AM
I love you too, Kevin. For never wert thou a Spaz more splendid. :D :kiss:

scarletpeaches
12-05-2007, 02:01 AM
'Til a' the seas gang dry, dear Spaz.

scarletpeaches
12-05-2007, 02:04 AM
Nay! We shall skippity hoppity across them like two people in love with life itself.

scarletpeaches
12-07-2007, 05:18 AM
On benbradley's orders I am taking this matter to this thread...:D

The reason I was so happy in the above posts? Bah. Turns out there's something else to whinge about in this damn workplace! :rant:

It's after one in the morning and I'm really tired now so I'll be quick. For once.

On Tuesday a guy asked for my number and the office bike got wind of it and decided to make a play for him, because she's the type to enjoy f***ing up anything that involves a guy fancying another woman. I mean, can I help it if I'm irresistible?

You find out who your friends are, though, because the bike's ex-boyfriend got to hear of it and had a word with the blokey who likes me and told him exactly what's going on. Made it clear her affection wasn't genuine and she was only smarming up to him because she could see he fancied another woman. Me. :D

So that's why I've lost a little more faith in women today. They're so bitchy.

That said, the person who told me what the office bike was doing, was a woman. "I'm only telling you because you've got a right to know, and you need to have nothing to do with her. Any information she can get out of you, she'll use against you. She's a bitch."

So all in all, I feel protected, almost, by some good people but I feel sad that there are people like this in the world. They see others getting on, having fun, and have to ruin it. And you're like, "Are you so pathetic that you can't find friends of your own? You have to ruin burgeoning relationships and friendships because you're too bloody useless to form your own bonds? Are you that low and empty in yourself?"

Bah! I'm having a cuppa then going to bed.

scarletpeaches
12-18-2007, 10:30 PM
Today Bitchtits, Jr surpassed herself.

She and Curly (my name for a student who works - sorry, is supposed to work, 16 hours a week) were working on the ground floor. I had jobs to do here and there but was mostly on the same floor.

At one point Curly handed me the RF gun (the price ticket gun for those not in the know) as there was merchandise needing propely priced, and I said, "Why can't you do it?"

"Because I have other stuff to do."

"Oh. Right. And I don't?"

Anyway...I had to go upstairs to get some FDG (faulty/damaged goods) paperwork signed by a supervisor. Quarter of an hour later I get back downstairs.

Bitchtits asks, "Where were you?"

"Upstairs."

"No you weren't. I followed you and you weren't there."

"I beg your pardon? Yes I was."

"Well you can't just go off like that. You were gone for fifteen minutes and no-one knew where you were. You really need to tell us where you're going."

"Oh, do I? Try telling that to other people on this 'team', then."

"Like who? Look...you can't just."

"I can and I did. I needed to FDG some things."

"Why?"

[Adopts 'mong' voice] "Because...they...were...broken..."

"You really should-"

"Oh, should I? Well is it okay if I get on with this now? Or do you have any more complaints about how I do my job?"

So...my comment about 'letting other people on this team know' the rules she chooses to inflict on us? I meant Curly. The other day he came in on his day off to ask our manager if he could change his hours the following day. The reason? He was pre-planning his hangover and wanted a lie-in. Now, I thought that was bad enough but the manager let him...probably was having a good day. Anyway. The next day, Curly shows up, hungover and late. Then later on that afternoon, he goes home, 'ill', leaving everyone else to do his job as well as their own.

I'm the ONLY Christmas temp who started early - a few weeks before everyone else. I've done overtime, overnights, late shifts, had my hours mucked about at the last minute, worked on other departments to help out, had virtually no social life for the past two months because of my changeable rota, and what thanks do I get? I've NEVER been late or called in sick - in fact I've gone to work on three hours' sleep, with a migraine before. I've stayed late - okay, ten, fifteen minutes here and there but I don't like to leave a job half done. And this is how I'm treated!

Curly's just taking the piss - he doesn't care about the job at all and his casal attitude is progressively worsening. Bitchtits, on the other hand...she's seventeen years old and she's taken to following me - or claiming to - while I'm off seeing to essential paperwork? And yes, it's important than when glass is broken it's cleaned up straight away and the faulty merchandise is taken off the shop floor.

Anyway, I was in a right old tizzy at home time and decided to speak to one of the managers. At reception we have a tick/cross board so you can tell who's in and who's not. I spoke to the Admin Manager who admitted I would be better off speaking to my direct superior who wasn't in, but she offered to email him on my behalf. I thanked her for her offer but said as I'm 31, I should act like it, and deal with the problem myself, rather than going through her.

But she said, "You've done the right thing. If someone's in a management position or supervisory-"

"She's not, though. She's a sales advisor, just like me."

"But if she ever wants to be, she has to learn how to speak to people, most importantly the people she works with most closely."

"Yes, I suppose. But I don't want to be a grass."

"No, you're not. It has to be dealt with. Speak to [your manager] on Thursday; he'll sort it out."

"Hmm. I hope so...I'm just worried about who her mother is."

"Oh, I don't think [Bitchtits] thinks like that. I don't think that's a factor."

"Perhaps not. But it's bound to be in the back of her mind that she has that sense of protection. Her mother's a sales manager here so people are maybe scared of saying something. But I've had it up to here...I'm leaving soon anyway, but something has to be done, or I'll flip."

"Well you've gone the right way about it in speaking to me. Speak to your manager on Thursday, enjoy your day off and try not to stress about it!"

So - wish me luck.

scarletpeaches
12-18-2007, 10:35 PM
I've just realised. I should have said, "If you followed me, how come you didn't know where I was?"

You always think of these things after the event, don't you?

Sheryl Nantus
12-18-2007, 11:06 PM
good advice.

take it easy, go in on Thursday and follow through with the complaint.

what's the worst that can happen? she's going to treat you BADLY?

:D

scarletpeaches
12-18-2007, 11:24 PM
I haven't got a clue what I'm so scared of, apart from the old chestnut, "I don't like conflict."

Well show me one person who does. Heh. I just need to get over myself and deal with it like an adult.

HeronW
12-18-2007, 11:25 PM
Bring paper proof of all the positive things you've done--orders, inventory, shipping etc, back it up with positive references from co-workers on your performance, and take C with you --if she'll go-- to explain your issues to the boss over the 17 yr old twit. If that person doesn't listen go to a higher up. Last resort before quitting, bringing in proof of furkups by the 17 year old twit, plus written complaints by customers and co-wkers about her.

scarletpeaches
12-18-2007, 11:27 PM
There's no paperwork to prove what work I've done, and no written complaints from customers. Why would a customer go to all that trouble? They could just walk away. As for orders, etc...it doesn't work like that. Stock comes in, I put it on the shelf. That's my job, it's what I do.

ShebaJones
12-19-2007, 12:37 AM
Knock her unconscious and pee in her ear. Exert your dominance!

Disclaimer: I haven't worked retail in ten years, probably because of my attitude.

Real advice and encouragement: You're handling this way better than I would. Keep doing what you're doing, which is facing the problem with grace, maturity, and some healthy venting.

Fox The Cave
12-19-2007, 01:00 AM
Clock the bitch.

Problem solved.

ATP
12-19-2007, 05:06 AM
I think men can be better at departmentalizing things like this than women, but Derek is right. Learning to Let It Go is a great skill.

Can be better? Are better? Or just better at seemingly keeping a 'lid on things'. Don't you believe it though.

scarletpeaches
12-20-2007, 04:39 AM
I'm starting to get scared about tomorrow, having to speak to my manager about this.

The Admin Manager, who I spoke to on Tuesday afternoon, said, "Just say to him exactly what you've said to me, exactly the way you've said it, and you'll be fine."

Still nervous, though. Worried it'll make me look like a grass, I suppose. Silly, but...wish me luck. :(

scarletpeaches
12-20-2007, 10:33 AM
I'm straightening my hair at half past six in the morning just so I can go into work feeling all, "Yeah! I can do this! Look at me, with my perfect hair!"

Backward Masking
12-20-2007, 12:35 PM
Knock 'em dead, Scarletpeaches. :D

scarletpeaches
12-27-2007, 08:55 PM
Job's still shitty but I wore a tiara to work today and was told I looked 'very pretty' by a nineteen-year-old who works on menswear.

He definitely would.

Thing is, I definitely wouldn't. :D

Azraelsbane
12-28-2007, 12:19 AM
Hmm, I'll join you in the land of shitty jobs. ;)

scarletpeaches
12-28-2007, 03:10 AM
Only got a week to go before I can walk out for good...

I hope they don't offer me something permanent; I really do.

scarletpeaches
12-29-2007, 02:47 PM
This may very well be the straw that broke the camel's back.

When my department had another manager, he got the rotas done weeks in advance, so you could plan stuff. Have a social life.

And the new one? He's as much use as a chocolate teapot. The new week starts on Sundays, for some reason, and next week's rota hasn't been made up yet. By Saturday. My day off. So I can't plan anything for the next week, and I don't even know if I'm working tomorrow.

So I called my boss this morning and he said he'd phone back in ten minutes. That was two hours ago.

Why the fuck am I bothering with these people? WHY??? Are they so fucking incompetent that they can't even let the staff know when they're supposed to be working? Do I really have to spend my day off nagging them by phone to let me know when I'm needed?

Okay...advice needed here. I'm going to call the Admin Manager soon, to explain my problem. Aside from that, should I just not show up tomorrow and if my boss calls to ask where I am, I'll just say, "Well you didn't make up the rota so I assumed I had another day off?"

Only problem is I'm concerned about losing wages this coming week, which, thank Christ, is my last.

scarletpeaches
12-29-2007, 03:37 PM
I'm talking to myself in this thread. Never mind, it helps to get it off my chest.

I called the Admin Manager and left my number JUST IN CASE my boss decided to lose it or be an idiot of the first water. Ten minutes later, he called me with my rota for next week. I've got tomorrow off too - yay!

And Ne'erday. Not that I'll have a hangover, you understand.