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JennaGlatzer
10-29-2007, 10:17 AM
Yes, It's True: Lynne Spears to Write Parenting Book
http://www.usmagazine.com/britney_spears_50

Opty
10-29-2007, 10:23 AM
Wow.

That's...um....yeah.

John Paton
10-29-2007, 10:29 AM
So Britney's Mother, Lynn, is writing a parenting book.

Britney is worth at a conservative estimate - US$25 million.
The world still seems infatuated with her every move.

OK. I am beginning to run out of plusses here.

A parenting book.

As Jerry Lewis said to Dean Martin when Dean broke up the act "You're kidding, right?"

Regards
John

poetinahat
10-29-2007, 10:37 AM
In a related story, my cookbook - Charcoal: The Great Taste Equalizer - will be on sale next week.

Wallaceka
10-29-2007, 11:24 AM
Good Heavens.

Ava Jarvis
10-29-2007, 11:26 AM
I'm so not up on my celebrities, although I have brushed up with the Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Even so, the whole Britney debacle is such that even I say: Damn. Are there no gods?

Christine N.
10-29-2007, 02:54 PM
I can think of things that would be worse...

A Michael Jackson parenting book.

A Martha Stewart investment book.

A Lindsay Lohan 'How to survive in Hollywood' book.

Paris Hilton's Money-Saving guide.

Another children's book from Madonna.

KTC
10-29-2007, 03:05 PM
I heard that Gary Glitter will also be penning a book about children. Maybe they should co-author?

Devil Ledbetter
10-29-2007, 03:20 PM
I can think of things that would be worse...

A Michael Jackson parenting book.

A Martha Stewart investment book.

A Lindsay Lohan 'How to survive in Hollywood' book.

Paris Hilton's Money-Saving guide.

Another children's book from Madonna.Good ones. We also need Scott Peterson and OJ Simpson to co-write a book on maintaining marital bliss.

KTC
10-29-2007, 03:22 PM
John Bobbit could write a book on disengaging.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
10-29-2007, 03:24 PM
http://www.robbymac.org/images/mistakes.jpg

KTC
10-29-2007, 03:25 PM
OFG could possibly write a book on LEAVING FOR GOOD. But it wouldn't be that good.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
10-29-2007, 03:28 PM
It was a trial leave. With all the critiques I got, the next one will be better.

robeiae
10-29-2007, 03:28 PM
From the article:

“It’s a parenting book that’s going to have faith elements to it."
Faith elements? Like "I have faith that people will never, ever listen to a word of advice from me on how to raise a child."

Or are they gonna go after Faith Hill?

KTC
10-29-2007, 03:30 PM
They have faith people will buy it just to see how preposterous the next thing from this family of morons can be. Faith is money in the bank.

brunoshouse
10-29-2007, 03:36 PM
unbelievable. That's all I have to say...

Christine N.
10-29-2007, 03:46 PM
Think PA will publish it??

Sure! Give it the chance it deserves.

Marlys
10-29-2007, 04:26 PM
Now, now. Be reasonable. You're ignoring the legion of parents who want their little girls to grow up to be a head-shaving cootie-flashing rehab-bouncing celebrity who loses custody of her own kids to her second ex-husband--the back-up dancer she married two months after the girlfriend she stole him from gave birth to his kid--and attacks photographers with umbrellas.

Could be a massive hit.

billythrilly7th
10-29-2007, 04:34 PM
Lohan Family To Star in Reality Show

Lindsay Lohan's family have signed up to star in their own reality TV show. The Osbournes-style program will mainly feature Dina Lohan and her singer/actress daughter Ali Lohan, but Lindsay will be making a few cameo appearances. Filming for the series, which will be shown on E!, is set to begin on October 30 in New York. Dina Lohan will be at the center of the action as well as serving as executive producer. The show will also follow the Lohan matriarch as she attempts to manage other performers' careers. She tells People, "It's about what I do, how you can be successful, and be a single mom and fulfilling your kids' dreams. It won't just be following my family around like other shows. It'll show me cultivating careers, going to soccer practice. Ali going to school and in the studio. It'll encompass everything. Lindsay is a family member and will lend a helping hand if Ali asks her, when she's in the recording studio. We just want it to be real."

I wish these people would just go away.

The Lohans. The Spears. The Hiltons.

Please god.

Don't kill them.

Just find an alternate planet for them.

Why have you done this to us?

C.bronco
10-29-2007, 04:39 PM
What Not to Do, By Lynne Spears. Stacy and Clinton appraise her decisions, throw them out and make suggestions chapter by chapter.

J. Weiland
10-29-2007, 04:46 PM
Maybe she is writing the book based on her experiences with the younger kid.

SherryTex
10-29-2007, 04:48 PM
Where exactly on the periodic table are faith elements --think they're missing a few neutrons, neurons, and have a few too many morons.

kalel32
10-29-2007, 04:49 PM
OK here it goes:

chapter 1. Exploiting you child for personal gain

2. How to never say "NO" to your child

3. Not listening to anyone about your child self-destructive ways

4. How to get the most publicity (good or bad) for your child

5. Why you should stand idly by while your child loses her children

nerds
10-29-2007, 04:52 PM
Lohan's bowl-of-flakes mother will also soon be telling the world how to be a Good Parent via a *cough* reality show. Can't remember what channel it'll air on. Maybe Lynne Spears will guest-star.

:scared:

kalel32
10-29-2007, 04:58 PM
More Chapters:

6. Shaving techniques, for those picture perfect moments

7. How to get your child implants while they are still underage

8. What not to do (shortest chapter in the book)

kristie911
10-29-2007, 05:00 PM
I'd read it just so I'd know what NOT to do.

Chumplet
10-29-2007, 05:13 PM
IF I DID IT RIGHT by Lynne Spears

On the cover will be a picture of .... um.... I googled 'Good Hollywood Parents' and nothing came up.

kalel32
10-29-2007, 05:21 PM
Chapter:

9. Helping your child find Mr.Right

10. What to do when Mr.Right becomes Mr.Wrong

11. Hairstyles for your child

12. Teaching money saving techniques to your child (not buying underwear)

JoeEkaitis
10-29-2007, 05:48 PM
I smell a WHOLE WEEK on Oprah!

kalel32
10-29-2007, 05:53 PM
Chapter:

13. Living in denial

14. Trailer trash: Not a bad thing anymore

15. How to get your younger child hoe'd up like her big sister

16. Sleeping with anyone: Your child's love life (keeping it a secret)

benbradley
10-29-2007, 06:29 PM
I have words, but if I posted them here I'd probably get banninated.

If I said bad things about Britney's mother would that be "disrespecting my fellow writer?" Or would I have to attack Lynn's ghostwriter?

OMG, I actually read the story, the publisher is Thomas Nelson. I suppose that means this will be the Bible of Parenting...


It was a trial leave. With all the critiques I got, the next one will be better.
Makes a mental note not to critique OFG's flounces.

...
12. Teaching money saving techniques to your child (not buying underwear)
Huh? She didn't give the same mommy speech everyone gets? Always wear clean underwear in case you get a DUI into an accident and have to be taken to the hospital.

Hillary
10-29-2007, 06:43 PM
You all seem to think this book is going to be serious. I fail to believe I live in such a universe.

It has to be a comedy, right?

stormie
10-29-2007, 06:59 PM
Unfortunately there are parents who will buy the book and quote from it, believing Britney's mother to be an expert on parenting. I mean, after all, she got her kid into the limelight (:rolleyes:). As a former teacher, I know this to be true. <sigh>

Marlys
10-29-2007, 07:07 PM
Unfortunately there are parents who will buy the book and quote from it, believing Britney's mother to be an expert on parenting. I mean, after all, she got her kid into the limelight (:rolleyes:). As a former teacher, I know this to be true. <sigh>
Anybody watching Kid Nation? I think we've found the perfect Christmas gift for Taylor's parents.

Unique
10-30-2007, 04:11 AM
Yes, It's True: Lynne Spears to Write Parenting Book
http://www.usmagazine.com/britney_spears_50

Isn't that like yelling, 'Fire' in a crowded theatre?

jst5150
10-30-2007, 05:00 AM
The unintentional comedy scale will be off the charts.

Wait. This just in. An excerpt:

"At some point, ya gotta let 'em out of the trailer. Ah mean, hell, yer soaps are gonna come on and you gotta be able to watch them, have yer smoke, and make sure yer curlers are in enough time without having t' constantly beat them kids over the heds with a rolled up Enquirer. Besides, you keep beatin' them kids enough, yer arms jiggle and the ash from yer cig drops on the floor. You get enny more burn holes in the rug an' the lan'lord is gonna boot you out again until you have to, well, you know, 'pay the rent' as we say round the Pine Oaks Trailer Park. Which ain't no biggee cuz last time, he was careful to stain th' drapes and not my newly peroxided hair. And I got another month. Anyway, lahk ah said, you gotta let them kids outta the trailer ... hey! Bill O'Rahlee's on!"

KTC
10-30-2007, 05:08 AM
Interesting?! Because I read a trailer too:

Whens theys all shooked of the limelight, I says its time to git to the cut n curl and buzz the blond locks clear off'n theys heads. The limelight would shine back and make real good the monies a comin' in.

Susie
10-30-2007, 05:41 AM
Maybe they made a mistake and she's writing the book on how not to be a good parent?

writerterri
10-30-2007, 06:38 AM
Leave Brittney's mom alone!

KTC
10-30-2007, 02:19 PM
Leave Brittney's mom alone!


You can't cut it, babe. And this just in: THIS IS NOT YOUTUBE!

poetinahat
10-30-2007, 02:33 PM
You can't cut it, babe. And this just in: THIS IS NOT YOUTUBE!
Boy, ain't that the truth. *sigh*

eldragon
10-30-2007, 02:50 PM
Maybe the book will be helpful!

For instance, my daughters have never put restraining orders against me, or been photographed sans panties. They've never had a weekend-long marriage or a single failed drug test.

I'm sure Britney's ma can tell me something about parenting, I'm just not sure what it is.

Inky
10-30-2007, 02:56 PM
How to exploit your kids at a young age, make a mint, get chummy with their ex-husband...start all over with next kid in line.

Little Lynn should run screaming from big Lynn.

I'm with edragon: my daughters don't shame me; I dont' shame them. 'Nuf said.

writerterri
10-31-2007, 04:16 AM
You can't cut it, babe. And this just in: THIS IS NOT YOUTUBE!


It's Mytube and I'll do what I want!

dork