My Garbage Exploded

melaniehoo said:

and now my house smells. Fortunately it happended on the tile floor but I can't get rid of the smell. I'm find it hard to write while the stench of rotting produce is turning my stomach.

Any suggestions to get rid of the smell? I don't like air fresheners but I'm about to pour cologne on the floor. Would citrus work?

Vomit.

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I wouldn't try vomit if I were you, you're house would probably smell worse.

Os.

Hon, I told you not to light the firecrackers before you threw them away.

Sorry, I farted.

maestrowork said:

Sorry, I farted.

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Lock thread.

Os.

You know, I always tell my husband he has to take the garbage out before it explodes. Sometimes I have to use my electric cattle prod to get it done, but I haven't decided if that's because he's lazy or because he likes it when I zap him...

I had nothing to do with it, I swear.

melaniehoo said:

Cattle prod, now there's an idea. He was the one carrying it when it burst & he did the dirty work of cleaning it up. I just held the new bag & mopped afterwards. He's good abuot taking it out when I remove it from the can and hand it to him.

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I sense a disturbance in the garbage force, Melanie. Could it be that you were using "wimpy wimpy wimpy" bags?

How healthy can this food be if it's prone to explosions?

Bleach.

I'd use bleach. Then throw up.

melaniehoo said:

I wish that's all it smelled like. Vomit might be a closer description. Makes me wish we didn't eat so healthy - it was all produce, eggs & meat. Nothing odorless like chips or cookies.

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I just meant that's why your garbage exploded...

melaniehoo said:

and now my house smells. Fortunately it happended on the tile floor but I can't get rid of the smell. I'm find it hard to write while the stench of rotting produce is turning my stomach.

Any suggestions to get rid of the smell? I don't like air fresheners but I'm about to pour cologne on the floor. Would citrus work?

Vomit.

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Ha!

That will teach you not to compost! People who put perfectly good rotting produce in the garbage deserve whatever disgusting, horrible fate befalls them.

I'm a gardener so I compost my discarded produce. Everything you see in this picture, including the happy gardner in the middle, is the product of compost and cow manure . . .




Imagine that you were a rotting cucumber. (go ahead - I dare you) Wouldn't you rather be reincarnated as rutabaga ("reincartnated as a rutabaga" ... hmmm .... OK, I'm copyrighting that) or as a butternut squash instead of spending eternity in a city landfill next to some old pampers and empty cans of hairspray?

Put 10 bags of microwave popcorn in and set it to 30 minutes.

No charge.

Since nobody's gonna help poor Melanie --

Try putting a big, shallow dish of ammonia in the room. I forgot where I heard this trick, but for ambient odors, it does seem to help. And I don't remember it just being a matter of masking it with the nose-hair-curling burn of ammonia either.

My first thought was to use bleach.

White vinegar. Wash it down with vinegar.

Unique said:

White vinegar. Wash it down with vinegar.

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And some ketchup and mayo, with a dash of chili sauce. Skip the onions, though.

Move.

Ammonia, vinegar & bleach all sound good.

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Sure. But do they all smell good?

Ammonia and bleach mixed together is supposed to produce lethal fumes so don't do that.