Pick self up, move on

Marian Perera · Aug 13, 2007

The agent requested a partial of my romantic fantasy and so I sent one out. Today the rejection letter came back.

"While I thought the premise of the story to be interesting, I felt that over-all, the story lacked the depth that I was looking for. It seemed that you could have taken the reader a bit deeper into the characters and especially the heroine early on in the story. We need to have a reason to cheer for her from page 1."

That was depressing, especially since I felt the heroine was one of my strongest female characters. Plus, if keeping your composure and self-control after you're handed over to a man who immediately orders you to strip naked isn't cheer-worthy, I don't know what is. Oh well, I suppose this is an exercise in maintaining my own composure as well. I just wish I didn't like this book so much; maybe that way the rejection wouldn't bother me.

Marian Perera · Aug 14, 2007

Well, one good thing about the rejection. It's made me determined to get more queries out about the book. There's still agents out there who haven't heard of my masterpiece, darnit.

Rejection never feels good, but if I can turn that depressing grey weight into some constructive energy to get the next batch of queries out, that will make me feel a bit better.

A.M. Wildman · Aug 14, 2007

Do it right now. Mail one.

Old sales axiom -No, just means not right now.

Julie Worth · Aug 14, 2007

Queen of Swords said:
We need to have a reason to cheer for her from page 1."

This is why I almost always send out sample material with the query. Why wait on a partial if they're going to find problems with page one?

KTC · Aug 14, 2007

Congrats on the request. Getting that request is a very big step...means your query had bite. Congrats. Good luck on the next attempt!

Marian Perera · Aug 14, 2007

Julie Worth said:
This is why I almost always send out sample material with the query. Why wait on a partial if they're going to find problems with page one?

Good point. I'll be sure to do that from now on. At least with the other requested partial, I copied and pasted the first ten pages into the body of the e-query letter, so the other agent hopefully didn't have the same concerns.

Calla Lily · Aug 14, 2007

Send it out again. Like, now. Good luck!

VictoriaLambert · Aug 14, 2007

Queen of Swords said:
The agent requested a partial of my romantic fantasy and so I sent one out. Today the rejection letter came back.

That must feel so incredibly disheartening. :rant:

I'm currently rattled over an unanswered query; however, your situation really puts things in perspective in regard to this process. Good luck QoS. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I'm sure you'll find a more suitable fit elsewhere.

Although, I'm simply a neophyte in regard to the ongoings of this biz, I would concur with the idea of sending a mini-partial with your query since it does seemingly eliminate that extra step. The sole notable exception would be those agents who are vehement about their submission guidelines.

popmuze · Aug 14, 2007

Queen of Swords said:
If keeping your composure and self-control after you're handed over to a man who immediately orders you to strip naked isn't cheer-worthy, I don't know what is.

I'm admittedly not a reader of this genre and don't know anything about your book or your writing, but that certainly doesn't stop me from offering the following:

Maybe she was too composed, when some other sort of reaction would have made her more a) believable, b) honorable, c) gutsy, d) heroic, e)compelling, f) spirited, g) quirky, h) petrified, i) clever, etc.

Jersey Chick · Aug 14, 2007

Here are some :Hug2:

Rejections suck, but look at this way - it wasn't a form rejection, so it's a step up. I got four rejection letters in one day - the first one was "Dear Author" and as I tore through them, they went from personalized, to almost a critique. I was happy that they actually had my name on them!

Anyhoo - what one doesn't like, another may love so just get to the next one on the list.

Marian Perera · Aug 14, 2007

popmuze said:
Maybe she was too composed, when some other sort of reaction would have made her more a) believable, b) honorable, c) gutsy, d) heroic, e)compelling, f) spirited, g) quirky, h) petrified, i) clever, etc.

Well, that's true enough. I can think of other reactions that would make the heroine more quirky or openly petrified (she's scared but doesn't show it), and so on, though manifesting those reactions would make her a different person from the one I wanted to write about. I still think she's gutsy and compelling, but then again, I'm biased towards my characters. Anyway, if the agent didn't like her as she is, the agent didn't like her as she is. I have a feeling that part of the problem is that I queried someone whose focus may be more on the romance than on the fantasy, whereas my novel is pretty much fifty-fifty.

clara bow · Aug 14, 2007

Remember that this is a very subjective business. If more than one agent tells you the same thing, that might be a reason to sit up and take notice. Otherwise, keep sending out those queries. Another agent might just love your heroine's stalwart-grace-under-pressure response.

I also received somewhat similar feedback on my own fantasy romance. The agent admitted he wasn't entirely familiar with the fantasy genre. Since my book is also a 50-50 split, I had a hard time knowing how much of the agent's feedback was on target vs. the story and characters and depth was fine *depending on how much weight the reader gives to either of the genre elements*, if that makes any sense.

good luck with your project!

JennaGlatzer · Aug 14, 2007

Exactly-- wait and see if you get the same sort of feedback more than once. If so, you'll know it's time to take another look.

In any case, sorry about the rejection, but good luck on the next submission!

ink wench · Aug 15, 2007

Sorry to hear it. It's a subjective business though. And you got feedback, that's awesome! You must be doing something right. (I never got feedback on my partial rejections.) Sounds like time to send out more queries!

Scrawler · Aug 15, 2007

Queen of Swords said:
"We need to have a reason to cheer for her from page 1."

I'm curious now... what is the reason (to cheer for her) that this agent so obviously missed? Why would we cheer keeping compsure?

Marian Perera · Aug 15, 2007

Scrawler said:
I'm curious now... what is the reason (to cheer for her) that this agent so obviously missed? Why would we cheer keeping compsure?

The heroine is a woman kept for the use of the nobility, and the story begins as the antagonist hands her over as a gift to a man supposedly more cruel than he is. Alone with this man and the sorceror who protects him, she keeps a practised smile on her face as she obeys his command to strip, and although she's terrified, she doesn't show it. Instead, she tries to keep calm, keep thinking and gain even a small advantage. I thought that was a pretty brave reaction. She doesn't start taking her clothes off until page ten or so, though. Maybe that's part of the problem.

Marian Perera · Aug 15, 2007

JennaGlatzer said:
Exactly-- wait and see if you get the same sort of feedback more than once. If so, you'll know it's time to take another look.

Thanks for the reply! The same partial got me a request for a full from the Ethan Ellenberg agency a few years ago, so for now, I'll take the rejection as evidence for the subjectivity clara bow mentioned, rather than an indication that there's something wrong with the partial.

Pick self up, move on

Marian Perera

starting over

Marian Perera

starting over

A.M. Wildman

Tentenda via est

Julie Worth

What? I have a title?

KTC

Stand in the Place Where You Live

Marian Perera

starting over

Calla Lily

On hiatus

VictoriaLambert

One of the Fabled Mists

popmuze

Last of a Dying Breed

Jersey Chick

Up all night to get Loki

Marian Perera

starting over

clara bow

Li'l Rug Bug

JennaGlatzer

wishes you happiness

ink wench

ray of motherf#%&ing sunshine

Scrawler

Bored fanatic

Marian Perera

starting over

Marian Perera

starting over