BACK TO THE SLAMMER

dclary · Jun 8, 2007

Judge was *not* at all pleased at Paris' masterful escape. He ordered her back to the slammer and told the sheriff's department to "knock that shit off."

(I may be paraphrasing a little, I wasn't actually there. But I like this judge a lot.)

Per the AP:
A judge has ordered Paris Hilton returned to jail and she was taken from court screaming.

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8PKQJQG1&show_article=1

Not only that, but the prosecutor wants to charge LA Sheriff Lee Baca with contempt for allowing house arrest -- when sentencing guidelines had specifically forbade it.

Billythrilly has been using all his amazing mental powers to send and keep Paris in jail. You should all thank him for the exertion it's taken him to overcome celebrity justice.

swvaughn · Jun 8, 2007

Man, Paris Hilton is sooo lucky. I want a 45-day sentence, damn it.

Thank you, Billythrilly. Excellent use of your mental powers. Gads, what a beeyatch...

(oh, as for the sheriff... in Japanese, baka means "idiot". Coincidence? I think not.)

CACTUSWENDY · Jun 8, 2007

Aw geewizz...........(Runs to get care package ready for mailing....wonder what you get little rich girls to play with in jail?)

dpaterso · Jun 8, 2007

"I want to thank the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department and staff of the Century Regional Detention Center for treating me fairly and professionally," she said. "I am going to serve the remaining 40 days of my sentence. I have learned a great deal from this ordeal and hope that others have learned from my mistakes."

I've sent an email to the Prime Minister of Great Britain asking that he press Mr. Bush to personally intervene in this case and show leniency to this poor sweet girl, who knows she did wrong. It's not a crime to be rich, and rich people should not be punished for it. Also, they should be allowed to buy their way out of jail. If you can't do that, then what the hell is money good for?

-Derek

Jersey Chick · Jun 8, 2007

Rats - you beat me to it!

Well, here's a little more if anyone really cares...

http://www.tmz.com/

Apparently she has to do the whole 45 days now. I only hope it doesn't scar her for life

dpaterso · Jun 8, 2007

The poor thing, she'll be passed from cell to cell like a wet rag doll.

<wistfully>

-Derek

Christine N. · Jun 8, 2007

Pshaw, it's not like she'll be put in the general population. She'll have 45 days in a cell all to herself, where they bring her three meals a day (and she needs to EAT some anyway.) No press, no parents. She can read, or pen her memoirs.

Sounds like a damn vacation to me. (Not that I WANT to be in jail, nor do I think it's a picnic, but being left alone for that long while someone waits on me sounds pretty sweet...)

Jaycinth · Jun 8, 2007

I apologise in advance for any rudeness I might put forth.

If she didn't want to go to jail for drunk driving why didn't she take some of that money she makes from 'showing up' at a party, and HIRE A DRIVER???

Noooooo, she has to drive around tanked. Luckily she didn't kill anyone.
She needs to sit on her hiney in that jail cell, with no makeup, no hair extensions, no cell phone...

no..MOMMY!!!!!
and be
no different from anyone else who was arrested and violated their probation.

However, I hope that at the end of her incarceration that she comes out looking just as nice as Rosie does today.

Cassiopeia · Jun 8, 2007

The problem is, *rolls her eyes* I can just see the next #1 New York Best Seller, entitled:

"How I became a person...my 45 nights in jail and I am reborn" by Paris Hilton.

*sigh* you know it's gonna happen.

wyntermoon · Jun 8, 2007

I'll ghost it!

And another article: http://www.forbes.com/feeds/ap/2007/06/08/ap3803888.html

JoeEkaitis · Jun 8, 2007

Cassiopeia said:
The problem is, *rolls her eyes* I can just see the next #1 New York Best Seller, entitled:

"How I became a person...my 45 nights in jail and I am reborn" by Paris Hilton.

*sigh* you know it's gonna happen.

Oooh, better make room on your American Women's Literature shelf, Oprah!

veinglory · Jun 8, 2007

Good. I mean, home arrest? Her home is bigger than my entire 500 unit apartment complex.

dclary · Jun 8, 2007

swvaughn said:
(oh, as for the sheriff... in Japanese, baka means "idiot". Coincidence? I think not.)

It means Idiot in LA, too, strangely enough.

zahra · Jun 8, 2007

You made me read something about Paris Hilton. I do not read about Paris Hilton. In fact, I resent the fact that I even know she exists.

You, dclary, are so on the naughty-step of my mind.

thethinker42 · Jun 8, 2007

CACTUSWENDY said:
Aw geewizz...........(Runs to get care package ready for mailing....wonder what you get little rich girls to play with in jail?)

Big hairy cellmates named "Bubba".

RLB · Jun 8, 2007

I remember the carefree days of not knowing who Paris Hilton was. Then- I believe it was late in 2003- her name started popping up all over the media, but never with any explanation as to why exactly she was important. So I googled her, thinking surely she must have made some staggeringly significant contribution to pop culture to be getting this much media attention.

I've been trying to forget her ever since.

And this thread isn't helping.

dclary · Jun 8, 2007

zahra said:
You made me read something about Paris Hilton. I do not read about Paris Hilton. In fact, I resent the fact that I even know she exists.

You, dclary, are so on the naughty-step of my mind.

You had Super-Nanny help you take control of your brain?

robeiae · Jun 8, 2007

Are there actually THREE STINKIN THREADS ABOUT PARIS STINKIN HILTON????

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66783
http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66826

Plus this one...

Mods!!!!

Scrawler · Jun 8, 2007

I think she's an idiot, but I feel a bit sorry for her because she really cannot function in the real world. I don't think the girl can use a toaster or iron a shirt. Her parents raised such a weakling and a ding-bat. They should have either made her go to college, or made her pick a charity to support-- they just allowed her to remain a dumb child.
I'd rather she stay out of jail and be forced to go to Darfur and start using her fame to bring awareness to REAL issues. Let her live in a tent and take care of starving babies instead of sitting in a cell for a month. Make her work in the pediatric AIDs unit in Los Angeles. Make her haul trash out of the Katrina neighborhoods that are still devastated.

What' s "not right" is police chiefs, judges, LA County Sheriffs, prosecutors, the Attorney General and county Supervisors not having their sh*t together and allowing her to go home, then ordering her to go back. These men just want to make a name for themselves off this case-- like that moron judge in the Anna Nicole case, like Judge Ito in the OJ case, etc. etc. If you don't lived in LA, you don't know how all these sycophants at city hall are when they get a taste of fame... they've been on the 6 local news stations all afternoon.

What's "not right" is me spending time to write and post things

I can't believe me! Arrgh!

dclary · Jun 8, 2007

robeiae said:
Are there actually THREE STINKIN THREADS ABOUT PARIS STINKIN HILTON????

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66783
http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=66826

Plus this one...

Mods!!!!

I wanted the folks in OP to see how the original office party-er was handling her sentencing.

stormie · Jun 8, 2007

Cassiopeia said:
The problem is, *rolls her eyes* I can just see the next #1 New York Best Seller, entitled:

"How I became a person...my 45 nights in jail and I am reborn" by Paris Hilton.

*sigh* you know it's gonna happen.

I'm sure it's already being written and publishers are lining up.

ChunkyC · Jun 8, 2007

robeiae said:
Are there actually THREE STINKIN THREADS ABOUT PARIS STINKIN HILTON????

Now we know what Bogie meant in Casablanca when he said, "We'll always have Paris."

stormie · Jun 8, 2007

ChunkyC said:
Now we know what Bogie meant in Casablanca when he said, "We'll always have Paris."

zahra · Jun 8, 2007

dclary said:
You had Super-Nanny help you take control of your brain?

Somebody had to.

billythrilly7th · Jun 8, 2007

dclary said:
Billythrilly has been using all his amazing mental powers to send and keep Paris in jail. You should all thank him for the exertion it's taken him to overcome celebrity justice.

Thank you.

Yes.

It's been grueling.

Luckily, I was able to win this one for all of us.

This one is for the little guy.

For every cab driver, construction worker, busboy, window cleaner, waitress, teacher, chimney sweeper, gym membership seller...

..and carpet cleaner.

If you've ever been picked on, put down, whether you think you're a nerd or not, come on down.

CUE "WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS"

BACK TO THE SLAMMER

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