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Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 02:37 PM
We've had this discussion before but I think it was for woman. ?

For a short story I've been working on...

What are the signals a man sends out when he wants/loves a woman. How do you know, whats the body signals? Do they look up away, etc.. This is the before marriage during the initial just getting to know phase.

Now I remember on woman it was said they send out signals like twisting hair..etc.. Body language.

Also, Anybody have that thread, please let me know.

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 03:02 PM
You're asking for trouble with this post Kimmi.

I think we are in the minority on AW for some reason but I'll give it a go.

A man will pretend a lot harder to understand what a woman is saying when they are dating.

A man will pretend to have manners when they start dating.

A man won't break wind in front of his new woman until after they have slept together.

A man will pretend to pay attention to her needs - for a short time.

Unfortunately no matter what stage of the relationship is at - sport will always come first.

JJ

Bmwhtly
06-08-2007, 03:04 PM
How can you tell if a man is 'interested' in a woman?

He turns up. :ROLL:

Seriously though, we're not that different from women. Lots of eye contact, if he's really listening.
As to body language, well, anything non-defensive (Not crossing arms or legs. Leaning in to the conversation) shows interest. Anything overtly friendly (even a touch on the hand) means he's uber-interested.

At least, thems the signals I semaphore.

Bmwhtly
06-08-2007, 03:06 PM
A man will pretend a lot harder to understand what a woman is saying when they are dating.

A man will pretend to have manners when they start dating.

A man won't break wind in front of his new woman until after they have slept together.

A man will pretend to pay attention to her needs - for a short time.

Unfortunately no matter what stage of the relationship is at - sport will always come first.

JJJJ, she asked for information not a stereotype.

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 03:07 PM
You're asking for trouble with this post Kimmi.

I think we are in the minority on AW for some reason but I'll give it a go.

A man will pretend a lot harder to understand what a woman is saying when they are dating.

A man will pretend to have manners when they start dating.

A man won't break wind in front of his new woman until after they have slept together.

A man will pretend to pay attention to her needs - for a short time.

Unfortunately no matter what stage of the relationship is at - sport will always come first.

JJ
:D Thank you JJ..now the initial meeting the first few meetings...How would the woman know the guy wants her..Whats his body language I wonder. Nervous, direct eye contact..?

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 03:07 PM
JJ, she asked for information not a stereotype.
;)

alleycat
06-08-2007, 03:37 PM
:D Thank you JJ..now the initial meeting the first few meetings...How would the woman know the guy wants her..Whats his body language I wonder. Nervous, direct eye contact..?
He keeps looking at her. He might look away, talk to someone else, get a drink . . . but he can't stop stealing a glance at her.

If he looks at her face and not her boobs . . . he's really interested in her!

And tell JJ to stop spying on me! ;-)

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 03:37 PM
Ok, body language it shall be.

Open. Let's just say that a man is sitting across from someone he is interested in. As long as there wasn't sport on the TV, he should turn his body toward her and open up his shoulders. Maintain his head tilted toward her position and look directly at her when she looks up. When she does this give a smile and avert his eyes away, but still maintain his head postion her way. He has to remain open with his body langauge ie no crossing of the legs away from her or turning his shoulders so that she is toward his back.

JJ

Edit - I posted too quick. Now alleycat will think I really am spying on him.

alleycat
06-08-2007, 03:41 PM
He pulls in his stomach whenever he thinks she sees him . . . even if he doesn't have a beer gut.

;-)

alleycat
06-08-2007, 03:43 PM
He puts a banana down his pants and . . .

Okay, wait, forget that. Sorry.

;-)

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 03:55 PM
He puts a banana down his pants and . . .

Okay, wait, forget that. Sorry.

;-)
Lock thread ...ohh alley, you crazy!

alleycat
06-08-2007, 03:55 PM
He will readily agree to take her to a fancy French restaurant and maybe the ballet afterwards . . . after they've been dating for six months, he'll take her to Pizza Hut and the boat show.

alleycat
06-08-2007, 03:56 PM
Lock thread ...ohh alley, you crazy!
I was going to mention tongue . . . but I decided not to. See, I can behave.

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 03:56 PM
Ok, body language it shall be.

Open. Let's just say that a man is sitting across from someone he is interested in. As long as there wasn't sport on the TV, he should turn his body toward her and open up his shoulders. Maintain his head tilted toward her position and look directly at her when she looks up. When she does this give a smile and avert his eyes away, but still maintain his head postion her way. He has to remain open with his body langauge ie no crossing of the legs away from her or turning his shoulders so that she is toward his back.

JJ

Edit - I posted too quick. Now alleycat will think I really am spying on him.
Ok, now thats what I was wondering. When she looks back he looks away? Why nothing crossed JJ? Does this mean if he does he's closing her out?

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:04 PM
ok guys would it be correct to say, when the man wants a woman. They are sitting there, but he's almost like a moth flitting toward the flame.? He doesn't want her to know yet but he keeps stealing glances when he thinks she's not looking?
Kinda a mating thing I would guess or rather mating dance on his part..I don't know I'm just a laundry queen ;)

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 04:06 PM
Ok, now thats what I was wondering. When she looks back he looks away? Why nothing crossed JJ? Does this mean if he does he's closing her out?

Spot on. It's actually the same for both sexes but because women generally cross their legs out of habit/manners, it is harder to judge. I think the bigger one is the opening of the shoulders for the male species.

JJ

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:09 PM
ok guys would it be correct to say, when the man wants a woman. They are sitting there, but he's almost like a moth flitting toward the flame.? He doesn't want her to know yet but he keeps stealing glances when he thinks she's not looking?
Kinda a mating thing I would guess or rather mating dance on his part..I don't know I'm just a laundry queen ;)
More or less. And just about anything she does or says will seem cute or charming to him. If she wears a frumpy old outfit, she will seem unpretentious and independent; if she wears the latest fashion, she will seem like a women with style and elegance. If she's not wearing anything at all . . . never mind.

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:09 PM
Spot on. It's actually the same for both sexes but because women generally cross their legs out of habit/manners, it is harder to judge. I think the bigger one is the opening of the shoulders for the male species.

JJ
I don't get the opening of shoulders, JJ. Does he square them back like army stance?

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:11 PM
More or less. And just about anything she does or says will seem cute or charming to him. If she wears a frumpy old outfit, she will seem unpretentious and independent; if she wears the latest fashion, she will seem like a women with style and elegance. If she's not wearing anything at all . . . never mind.Alley I'm passing you a cup of Java! ;)
rofl

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:13 PM
If he looks bored during their initial meeting, or asks what time the ballgame starts . . . that's a bad sign.

;-)

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 04:13 PM
Kimmi,

I talked a bit about evaluating behaviour and different types of communication here (http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=60213). You are right to be asking these questions as 55% of communication is done in the non-verbal manner. It really is an interesting subject (body language) and one that should be understood IMO to communicate through stories.

JJ

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:14 PM
Puppy dog eyes! Yeah, that's the ticket.

wordmonkey
06-08-2007, 04:14 PM
Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people.

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:17 PM
Kimmi,

I talked a bit about evaluating behaviour and different types of communication here (http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=60213). You are right to be asking these questions as 55% of communication is done in the non-verbal manner. It really is an interesting subject (body language) and one that should be understood IMO to communicate through stories.

JJ
Thanks JJ. Now I believe, I remember Silver King describing his emotions when he first met his wife to be. He said something, like... he was miserable around her and miserable away from her.

I wonder what emotions men feel? Maybe they are unsure? Afraid...not the cocky ones who are chasing for sport, the man that really wants the woman...

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 04:20 PM
I don't get the opening of shoulders, JJ. Does he square them back like army stance?

Two things. Firstly pumping out of the chest like he is the healthiest cave man in the pride. And (all those who hate me starting sentences with an 'and', there's another one) secondly, you shouldn't have your shoulders so that any of your back is facing the chase. So you 'open' them by having the chest toward the kill woman. Not so much like an Army stance - that would be too rigid.

JJ

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:23 PM
Two things. Firstly pumping out of the chest like he is the healthiest cave man in the pride. And (all those who hate me starting sentences with an 'and', there's another one) secondly, you shouldn't have your shoulders so that any of your back is facing the chase. So you 'open' them by having the chest toward the kill woman. Not so much like an Army stance - that would be too rigid.

JJ
Interesting. And you say he starts sentences with and...amazing.

JJ Cooper
06-08-2007, 04:24 PM
Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people.

Yep, nice one wordmonkey. That's mirroring communication. It's also a good interviewing technique.


I wonder what emotions men feel? Maybe they are unsure? Afraid...not the cocky ones who are chasing for sport, the man that really wants the woman...

Ok, I'm out Kimmi. My wife always says that I have no emotions. I won her on good looks and alcohol.

JJ

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:25 PM
Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people.
That's a pretty good one, just make it subtle if you use it. Or one awkward moment . . . they reach for the same thing, they bump their heads, they laugh and giggle, he takes her back to his apartment and rips her clothes off . . .

;-)

(It's Friday, I'm in a mood.)

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:30 PM
That's a pretty good one, just make it subtle if you use it. Or one awkward moment . . . they reach for the same thing, they bump their heads, they laugh and giggle, he takes her back to his apartment and rips her clothes off . . .

;-)

(It's Friday, I'm in a mood.)
You know Alley, I find it interesting that you men are aware of your emotions and signals at the time--are you aware at the time that is?

FRIDAYYYYY---

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:38 PM
You know Alley, I find it interesting that you men are aware of your emotions and signals at the time--are you aware at the time that is?
Yeah, vaguely; but it's kinda automatic too. We're like the peacock (make your own jokes), we just want to impress the lady by showing her our strong chest, fine tail feathers, and that we're harmless and she can trust us . . .


Then take her back to the apartment and rip her clothes off!

(I'm just teasing!)

alleycat
06-08-2007, 04:40 PM
Thanks JJ. Now I believe, I remember Silver King describing his emotions when he first met his wife to be. He said something, like... he was miserable around her and miserable away from her.
That's when you know you're in love . . . and doomed.

By the way, a guy can be quite interested in a woman (and not just for sex, although that thought does come up) and still not be anywhere near being in love. Being interested in an attractive woman is like taking a gentle boat trip down a pleasant river on a beautiful day . . . being in love is like going over Niagara in a barrel.

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:44 PM
Yeah, vaguely; but it's kinda automatic too. We're like the peacock (make your own jokes), we just want to impress the lady by showing her our strong chest, fine tail feathers, and that we're harmless and she can trust us . . .


Why nothing crossed JJ? Does this mean if he does he's closing her out?


(I'm just teasing!)
Hmm, I wonder what he does if he's fighting this emotion?

Then take her back to the apartment and rip her clothes off!
Yeah, Alley you are soo not--Call your girlfriend! ;)

Little Red Barn
06-08-2007, 04:45 PM
That's when you know you're in love . . . and doomed.

By the way, a guy can be quite interested in a woman (and not just for sex, although that thought does come up) and still not be anywhere near being in love. Being interested in an attractive woman is like taking a gentle boat trip down a pleasant river on a beautiful day . . . being in love is like going over Niagara in a barrel.
Oh Alley thats a really cool description.

BarbJ
06-08-2007, 06:55 PM
"Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people."

I've noticed this one. Regarding the non-crossing, some men also cross their legs. (So to speak; they put the right ankle on the left knee, usually.) It can be out of habit or because they want to appear comfortable and cool. Some men will cross their arms, not as a closing out but because it's "manly"; they usually uncross them when they realize what they're doing. Some do it as a self-protective instinct if the woman's attractive to them. They also cross their legs tighter; in the above example, they'll rest the middle of the calf on their knee. (Although this one may also be habit.)

Good point about being really interested if they look at one's face more than one's boobs. Some guys who pretend to be interested wouldn't be able to say what color a woman's eyes are, but they'll take a guess at her bra size.

Eye contact is usually maintained if he's concious of himself more than her and if they've met recently; the looking away may mean he's interested but not yet comfortable with her.

Just my opinion as a recipient.

Little Red Barn
06-09-2007, 04:13 AM
"Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people."

I've noticed this one. Regarding the non-crossing, some men also cross their legs. (So to speak; they put the right ankle on the left knee, usually.) It can be out of habit or because they want to appear comfortable and cool. Some men will cross their arms, not as a closing out but because it's "manly"; they usually uncross them when they realize what they're doing. Some do it as a self-protective instinct if the woman's attractive to them. They also cross their legs tighter; in the above example, they'll rest the middle of the calf on their knee. (Although this one may also be habit.)

Good point about being really interested if they look at one's face more than one's boobs. Some guys who pretend to be interested wouldn't be able to say what color a woman's eyes are, but they'll take a guess at her bra size.

Eye contact is usually maintained if he's concious of himself more than her and if they've met recently; the looking away may mean he's interested but not yet comfortable with her.

Just my opinion as a recipient.
Thanks yes mirroring communication--this seems to be true.

rhymegirl
06-09-2007, 07:30 PM
A man will pretend a lot harder to understand what a woman is saying when they are dating.

A man will pretend to have manners when they start dating.

A man won't break wind in front of his new woman until after they have slept together.

A man will pretend to pay attention to her needs - for a short time.

Unfortunately no matter what stage of the relationship is at - sport will always come first.

JJ

You realize this stinks. It's one reason women never think they can trust men.

Little Red Barn
06-09-2007, 08:03 PM
You realize this stinks. It's one reason women never think they can trust men.
Yuppers, Rhyme, you gotta love em...;)

Akuma
06-10-2007, 03:03 AM
"Taking drinks at the same time. When two people are connecting there is a subconscious thing that happens, so that over dinner, say, as she picks up her glass to sip the wine, he will take the same moment to drink form his own glass.

If you people watch, that's a cool little way of judging the level of connection between two people."

I've noticed this one. Regarding the non-crossing, some men also cross their legs. (So to speak; they put the right ankle on the left knee, usually.) It can be out of habit or because they want to appear comfortable and cool. Some men will cross their arms, not as a closing out but because it's "manly"; they usually uncross them when they realize what they're doing. Some do it as a self-protective instinct if the woman's attractive to them. They also cross their legs tighter; in the above example, they'll rest the middle of the calf on their knee. (Although this one may also be habit.)

Good point about being really interested if they look at one's face more than one's boobs. Some guys who pretend to be interested wouldn't be able to say what color a woman's eyes are, but they'll take a guess at her bra size.

Eye contact is usually maintained if he's conscious of himself more than her and if they've met recently; the looking away may mean he's interested but not yet comfortable with her.

Just my opinion as a recipient.

People tend to cross their legs towards the person they like more, say, in a movie theater. The whole subconscious thing.

Which begs the question:
which way would you cross your legs if you sat between Hitler and Stalin?

Tsu Dho Nimh
06-10-2007, 05:38 AM
He'll offer to feed her ... off his plate. My nephew once observed that if a girl would let him hand-feed her french fries, she liked him.

He'll try to touch her hair. If she permits it, she's interested.

Silver King
06-10-2007, 05:46 AM
...Now I believe, I remember Silver King describing his emotions when he first met his wife to be. He said something, like... he was miserable around her and miserable away from her...
I thought I heard my name echo across the boards. :)

I was miserable, all right, and as someone with more talent for expression once coined, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..."

And it still is.

alleycat
06-10-2007, 06:16 AM
You realize this stinks. It's one reason women never think they can trust men.
Oh, wow. You could hurt our feelings . . . if we had any.

rhymegirl
06-11-2007, 02:32 PM
Oh, wow. You could hurt our feelings . . . if we had any.

I'm sure you don't fit his description, alleycat.

But some guys do and they ruin it for men in general.

JJ Cooper
06-11-2007, 02:44 PM
People tend to cross their legs towards the person they like more, say, in a movie theater. The whole subconscious thing.

Which begs the question:
which way would you cross your legs if you sat between Hitler and Stalin?

You would probably be standing in that company.

JJ

scarletpeaches
06-11-2007, 03:57 PM
I'm sure you don't fit his description, alleycat.

But some guys do and they ruin it for men in general.

Some women put on an act as well.

I think the female equivalent would be playing the damsel in distress act, acting like they can't do anything themselves, which can ruin things for other women - why make an effort for someone with brains when you can find someone willing to settle for second best and be disrespected?

Little Red Barn
06-11-2007, 04:17 PM
You would probably be standing in that company.

JJ
Morning JJ,
Standing so to speak--If he's unsure, how would he stand? Face or turn to side?

alleycat
06-11-2007, 04:20 PM
Morning JJ,
Standing so to speak--If he's unsure, how would he stand? Face or turn to side?
Would you repeat the question?

JJ Cooper
06-11-2007, 04:25 PM
Morning JJ,
Standing so to speak--If he's unsure, how would he stand? Face or turn to side?

It's 10.30 at night here Kimmi and sorry, but I don't understand the question.

JJ

Little Red Barn
06-11-2007, 04:29 PM
Standing near her...he keeps looking at her but when eyes meet he turns away?
Morn Alley! :)

alleycat
06-11-2007, 04:32 PM
Standing near her...he keeps looking at her but when eyes meet he turns away?
Morn Alley! :)
It might depend on whether she's showing any interest or not. If she smiles and looks back with that "come hither" look in her eyes, he won't turn away. If she's looking at him like he's pond scum, he'd probably look away. I used to look away a lot. ;-)

JJ Cooper
06-11-2007, 04:37 PM
Ok, I get it now. I was responding to the Akuma post with Hitler and Stallin when I said you would probably be standing in that company. For your answer I would go with the alleycat.

JJ

Little Red Barn
06-11-2007, 04:52 PM
It might depend on whether she's showing any interest or not. If she smiles and looks back with that "come hither" look in her eyes, he won't turn away. If she's looking at him like he's pond scum, he'd probably look away. I used to look away a lot. ;-)
But you guys said he might look at her when she's not looking at him, vice versa...
mmm, alley I bet not on your looks you rcvd. :)

alleycat
06-11-2007, 05:06 PM
But you guys said he might look at her when she's not looking at him, vice versa...
mmm, alley I bet not on your looks you rcvd. :)
Yes, but your question this time said he was standing near her; I assumed you meant like in a small group at a party, within speaking distance. If they were across the room from each other, it might be different.

Monkey
06-11-2007, 07:09 PM
When my husband and I met, we couldn't keep our eyes off each other. Other people noticed and commented, and even tried to embarrass the heck out of us, but we kept stealing glances at one another. When our eyes met, I would usually look away - only to look again, seconds later. If I didn't look away, neither of us would.

If we were near each other, we tended to touch. We'd sit close enough that our outer thighs were touching, or we'd both "happen" to place our hands in the same area so that our hands ended up touching, or whatever.

My husband and I don't usually mirror each other while dining. Despite three children who demand lots of attention during meals, we usually become absorbed in each other's conversation. This means that I sip my drink while maintaining eye contact when he's talking, and he does the same while I speak. Our discourse usually goes something like a tennis match, so meals tend to drag on, with as much talking getting done as eating. There is seldom a pause long enough for both of us to take a drink in silence. Because of this, I'm not sure that mirroring is always a good indicator of two people's connection. It is probably more accurate when people are less familiar with one another than it is after 10-15 years.

Another thing: new loves love to talk to each other. About anything. Really. Sometimes I tell my husband about junk mail (we act and feel as if we are dating half the time). No conversation is too small, because it's not really about the words. Its about relating to someone you are fascinated with. I think this is a good sign that a guy is interested in you...if he can't think of anything to say, he'll just say anything.

Nonetheless, two people who are really interested in each other will take each other's conversation seriously...so if she's talking about a piece of junk mail, somehow, to him, it's relavent to something much larger, and therefore interesting. The conversation could go on for an hour before morphing into a new one. If she says, "Oops" or acts like something has come up, he'll be terribly concerned. If she says, "When I was ten, my dog died..." he will seem genuinely saddened. If she says, "Hold on a sec..." he'll wait, and he won't immediately turn his attention elsewhere. He may even watch her longingly.

At least, this is the way of it with a really good guy in a relationship destined to really go somewhere. (Or at the very least, my experience of it when it's a good guy and the relationship is going to last).

Little Red Barn
06-12-2007, 04:04 PM
Yes, but your question this time said he was standing near her; I assumed you meant like in a small group at a party, within speaking distance. If they were across the room from each other, it might be different.
True he is near.
This is really interesting Alley the whole body language stuff as matter of fact... understanding it.

alleycat
06-12-2007, 06:02 PM
True he is near.
This is really interesting Alley the whole body language stuff as matter of fact... understanding it.
Remember, a guy will often key off of the reactions he gets from her. The more positive responses from her, the more forward he will be.

If he give her a slight nod, and she smiles back . . . good.
If he give her a slight nod, and she quickly turns away . . . bad.

If he looks at her, and she holds his gaze . . . good.
If he looks at her, and she rolls her eyes . . . bad.

If he asks her name, and she says "Jennifer. And yours?" . . . good.
If he asks her name, and she says "I'm Tom's friend. I've gotta go help Judy with the cake." . . . bad.

And sometimes you can get mixed signals. Or misinterprets the signals (I've done that a couple of time myself).

scarletpeaches
06-12-2007, 06:37 PM
If he give her a slight nod, and she quickly turns away . . . bad.

Not necessarily. Some women are nervous, shy or overcome with lustful thoughts and need to turn away out of bashfulness.

If you fancy someone sometimes it hurts to look at them and it hurts not to look at them.

Medievalist
06-12-2007, 06:46 PM
You're asking for trouble with this post Kimmi.

Why on earth would you say that? It's a perfectly reasonable question.

Medievalist
06-12-2007, 06:47 PM
Not necessarily. Some women are nervous, shy or overcome with lustful thoughts and need to turn away out of bashfulness.

If you fancy someone sometimes it hurts to look at them and it hurts not to look at them.

Sometimes the more you like someone, the harder it is to look at them directly--there's that fear/concern/worry about revealing too much of your feelings.

scarletpeaches
06-12-2007, 06:52 PM
Indeed. You want to but you can't, because then they'll know you like them, which would be good if they felt the same, but there's the fear of rejection...*sigh* I so know that feeling.

alleycat
06-12-2007, 06:53 PM
Not necessarily. Some women are nervous, shy or overcome with lustful thoughts and need to turn away out of bashfulness.

In that case, there's usually a shy good away, and a guy can often tell the difference in whether she's looking away because she's not interested, or because she's shy.

alleycat
06-12-2007, 06:58 PM
Indeed. You want to but you can't, because then they'll know you like them, which would be good if they felt the same, but there's the fear of rejection...*sigh* I so know that feeling.
When I was of a certain age, guys still generally had to make the first move . . . which sometimes meant getting "kicked in the nuts", rhetorically speaking.

"Hi, Debbie. Would you like to go out Friday?"

"Hell, no. Get away from me you creepy weirdo."

A really mean girl would do it right in front of your friends, or hers. Ah, the good old days.

Medievalist
06-12-2007, 07:11 PM
When I was of a certain age, guys still generally had to make the first move . . . which sometimes meant getting "kicked in the nuts", rhetorically speaking.

"Hi, Debbie. Would you like to go out Friday?"

"Hell, no. Get away from me you creepy weirdo."

A really mean girl would do it right in front of your friends, or hers. Ah, the good old days.

OK.

That's just horrible. There's no excuse for that. That's the sort of thing you'd say to a stalker, not just a request for a date.

Still . . . not a good idea to ask anyone for a date, especially early on, in front of others.

Writer2011
06-12-2007, 07:12 PM
This is an interesting post Kimmi...

All men are different, myself included.

When I like a woman, i'll compliment on her hair or smile, eyes, ect.. Hope this helps.

alleycat
06-12-2007, 07:35 PM
OK.

That's just horrible. There's no excuse for that. That's the sort of thing you'd say to a stalker, not just a request for a date.

Still . . . not a good idea to ask anyone for a date, especially early on, in front of others.
I think some girls did it intentionally to pump themselves up in front of their friends (other politely wait to tell all their friends until they go to the restroom). Guys do other stuff for the same reason. And, to be honest, most girls are pretty nice about not wanting to hurt a guy's feelings directly.

This sort of thing seems to happen when you're younger. When you get older it doesn't matter so much.

Me: "Hi, Debbie. Would you like to go out Friday?"
Her: "Hell, no. Get away from me you creepy weirdo."
Me: "Well, okay . . . but can I have your bread sticks before I go; you don't look like you're going to eat them."

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 03:34 PM
I think some girls did it intentionally to pump themselves up in front of their friends (other politely wait to tell all their friends until they go to the restroom). Guys do other stuff for the same reason. And, to be honest, most girls are pretty nice about not wanting to hurt a guy's feelings directly.

This sort of thing seems to happen when you're younger. When you get older it doesn't matter so much.

Me: "Hi, Debbie. Would you like to go out Friday?"
Her: "Hell, no. Get away from me you creepy weirdo."
Me: "Well, okay . . . but can I have your bread sticks before I go; you don't look like you're going to eat them."
yes alley the Hi Debbie scene is usually high school I'd think. But yes I can see that happening.

And Scarlets reply about rejection--I'd think that would be very true. No one likes rejection.

There is a lot to be said for the whole introductory part to a start of a relationship--The movements, speech etc... as well as where its moving.

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 03:38 PM
This is an interesting post Kimmi...

All men are different, myself included.

When I like a woman, i'll compliment on her hair or smile, eyes, ect.. Hope this helps.
Hey you! Good to see you! This is true for a lot of males but some will be too shy to do so...or so I'd think, so they'll use physical language to communicate.

alleycat
06-13-2007, 03:40 PM
I'm not sure how you're using any of this in your writing, but you can make it as easy or as hard as you needed.

I've worked at getting a date with someone, and had it where it happened almost as an accident.

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 03:40 PM
Why on earth would you say that? It's a perfectly reasonable question.
;) He was just teasing Medi.

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 03:42 PM
I'm not sure how you're using any of this in your writing, but you can make it as easy or as hard as you needed.

I've worked at getting a date with someone, and had it where it happened almost as an accident.
Well, right now I'm just trying to learn as I find the subject interesting. The whole body language communication... ;)

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 03:43 PM
I'm not sure how you're using any of this in your writing, but you can make it as easy or as hard as you needed.

I've worked at getting a date with someone, and had it where it happened almost as an accident.
Ohh good idea Alley--Serendipity to be sure :)

alleycat
06-13-2007, 03:48 PM
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Ohh good idea Alley--Serendipity to be sure :)

I can give you a couple of ideas about that if you need them later.

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 07:25 PM
I can give you a couple of ideas about that if you need them later.
Sounds good--whenever you get a chance, no rush. :)

Little Red Barn
06-13-2007, 10:15 PM
JJ, whenever you wake up... you have some good thought from a male perspective. :)