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MarkEsq
04-27-2007, 12:38 AM
I've never been to one (he says quickly) so I have a question. Would it be normal/acceptable for a couple to go into a gay club in order to pick up either a man or a woman to 'play' with for the night or weekend? How would a kinky couple go about finding a third person??

I ask for my novel, I promise. :)

Writer2011
04-27-2007, 12:44 AM
There are swinger magazines out there and dozens of websites... I did research for a novel too-- that never got finished :)

PattiTheWicked
04-27-2007, 01:19 AM
Usually gay clubs are for same sex hookups only. If you're looking for a threeway, you generally end up at a swingers' club, although I did know a couple who used to troll for girls together at a lesbian bar. Most of the gay people I know are somewhat offended by the idea of someone "playing gay for a day" just for nookie.

That's not to say people don't do it, it's just that it's an entirely different circle of people.

Novelust
04-27-2007, 01:27 AM
Patti's got it down. *nods*

scarletpeaches
04-27-2007, 01:29 AM
I asked a bisexual friend why she hadn't made a pass at me, as she told me she thinks I'm good-looking.

Apparently, I'm "Not gay enough."

Great. Rejected by all colours on the sexual spectrum.

This doesn't contribute to the thread, but I needed to tell someone.

Penguin Queen
04-27-2007, 01:37 AM
When you say "a couple", do you mean a straight couple?

Of so, then yep -- what Patti said.

"Bi-curious" straight couples would not be welcome in any of the queer places I know in London. I would assume the same to go for the US scene.

There are websites where gay men look for contact for sex, & similar for gay women (although these tend to be less in-your-face about the cruising), & bi-curious / threesome-curious straight couples certainly pop up there every now & then. You might consider a previous hook-up via a website like that, mebbe.

Oh, and...


I've never been to one (he says quickly)

Nowt wrong with gay bars.

MarkEsq
04-27-2007, 01:39 AM
I asked a bisexual friend why she hadn't made a pass at me, as she told me she thinks I'm good-looking.

Apparently, I'm "Not gay enough."

Great. Rejected by all colours on the sexual spectrum.

This doesn't contribute to the thread, but I needed to tell someone.

Scarletpeaches, I have it on good authority that the couple in my novel would love to take you home and ravish you. Several times. For hours.
(Unfortunately, after the ravishing comes a certain amount of torture and death. Quite a lot of death.)

PattiTheWicked
04-27-2007, 03:22 AM
I asked a bisexual friend why she hadn't made a pass at me, as she told me she thinks I'm good-looking.

Apparently, I'm "Not gay enough."

Great. Rejected by all colours on the sexual spectrum.

This doesn't contribute to the thread, but I needed to tell someone.

If it makes you feel any better, if I was a lesbian I'd go for you.

:::smooooch:::

scarletpeaches
04-27-2007, 03:23 AM
Hey baby! :e2brows:

Cath
04-27-2007, 03:32 AM
This isn't the Office Party. Keep the thread focussed on the subject, not personal conversations please.

Nicole_Gestalt
04-27-2007, 03:34 AM
If this something spur of the moment? If it isn't then as has already been said there are loads and loads of websites they could go onto and its very easy to meet people that way (and they aren't all swinger sites either, there's lots of different ones including polyamorus sites).

They would be unlikely to pick someone up in a gay bar (its not impossible but it would depend on many things and is very unlikely). However there are swinger parties etc and other house parties that if they have done their research they should be able to find out about. The parties tend to be very safe affairs and everything is done only if the people want it to occur.

If it doesn't have to be them picking someone up in a gay bar there are loads and loads of different ways it could occur. It would also depend on what sex they are looking for (not massively but it does bias some people)

If you would like more info feel free to message me.

MacAllister
04-27-2007, 04:38 AM
Actually, it's offensive in the extreme in US queer clubs, too. Penguin Queen is exactly right.

Something like Craig's list, though? Or a local personal ad.

Medievalist
04-27-2007, 04:44 AM
Craig's List, email, then you meet at a neutral place for drinks and discuss terms. It's rude and well, sorta mean to go to a gay bar this kind of thing.

This is predictable motif 1076a in erotic lit or in smut though. Honest.

Cath
04-27-2007, 05:18 AM
I've seen swingers advertising in their profiles on myspace too, although I suspect that's less direct than Craigslist.

poetinahat
04-27-2007, 07:04 AM
So go to one. Observe, but don't stare. It's not like it's an expedition to observe the Yanomamo or anything.

If they ask you to leave, leave.

:e2shrug:

[ETA: that was a very important "it's not like" to leave out....]

P.H.Delarran
04-27-2007, 09:22 AM
There's a very popular club here whose crowd is definitely gay during the week, but it packs in all lifestyles on the weekend. I've seen couples hangin' out, (on weekends) and have had couples approach me on the dance floor. In fact, I've witnessed couples going after single women at 'hetero' clubs as well. There could be those after that kind of encounter, but most would be offended without previous arrangements (like personal ads) and in a place not designated for that kind of activity, (a form of swinging, yes?) - and trolling is ugly.
But it's easy to handle, you give a polite NO if not interested, and if they don't move on, kick 'em in the groin.
:D

ScarlettLeopard
04-27-2007, 06:54 PM
hmmm how much time does your couple have? If they can get to know people some chat rooms are good. Also an ad on alt.com (or a fictional variation)

RumpleTumbler
04-27-2007, 06:59 PM
If they don't have time use craigslist. They recently arrested a bunch of folks at the Atlanta airport because they were hooking up between flights in the crappers. Sick stuff.

MarkEsq
04-27-2007, 07:01 PM
hmmm how much time does your couple have? If they can get to know people some chat rooms are good. Also an ad on alt.com (or a fictional variation)

Not much time, it's a spur of the moment idea that comes to them while they are bored. Specifically, wife is bored. Husband is tied upside down to a St. Andrews cross covered in clothes pegs.

Vanatru
04-27-2007, 07:17 PM
As with any reply, your mileage may vary.


Would it be normal/acceptable for a couple to go into a gay club in order to pick up either a man or a woman to 'play' with for the night or weekend?



In part that will depend on what the local GLBT community is like and the club as well. Some will be more or less accepting of that behavior. I've been to several clubs where trolling was ok. And some where the regulars didn't care for it. Not every GLBT group/community is the same.

No one really likes to be used and discarded as a sex toy. That's kinda what it comes down to.

Some of the behavior was dictated by how much they knew the couple. If it was a regular duo then sometimes they found a partner for a night of wild debuachery.

I've rarely seen strangers hook up for a good bit o'fun. It happens regardless of what some say or think.



How would a kinky couple go about finding a third person??

I ask for my novel, I promise. :)

Do they have my email address yet? Just kidding. ;)

Back home the local porn stores have about.............6 rows of locally published swing magazines, running from 10$ up to 50$. They list people who have a desire to get freaky with one another. We even have a private swingers club. Generally by invitation only. Single guys need not apply. Couples are ALWAYS welcome.

That or just go to a bar, find some drunks guys and eventually you'll find one who'll do it with the couple.

Kentuk
04-28-2007, 09:17 AM
It would attract negative attention so if they beat the odds out of arogance then the your detective would get some good interviews from colorful characters who usually wouldn't tell tales on their in group.

veinglory
07-24-2007, 03:57 AM
I would agree it is more a swinger thing. General gay clientelle are typucally no more likely to go for a sudden threesome that a general straight clientelle. After all, it's half out of bounds for either. But swingers have already thought it through and sorted out the guidelines.

Siddow
07-24-2007, 04:09 AM
I LOVE gay clubs. We have the bestest of the best here in ATL: Backstreet.

Love it.

Don't think you'll find a bi-partner there. The guys want one to themself, the gals want to be left alone, there's coke in the head and wigs at the door...

Sigh. I love that place.

Your character needs to find a partner through an ad or an agency, or on the street. A 'for hire' type of person.

Mom'sWrite
07-24-2007, 04:09 AM
I read an article in Vogue, maybe 6-8 months ago. The topic was nightclubs that offer special services in the back room. Apparently for a hefty cover charge you can go in there, eat and drink freely from the banquet provided and screw your brains out with anyone else there, male or female, if they are willing. The only rule was that you had to leave with the same person you came (in) with. And they had a caveat about the drunks and druggies. Partakers had to be reasonably sober to get the nookie. The article focused on these types of clubs in Paris, but if they are there it's a sure bet they are here too.

veinglory
07-24-2007, 04:11 AM
Yes there are plenty of US sex clubs of various sorts.

CaroGirl
07-24-2007, 04:32 AM
When I used to go to clubs (many moons ago) I, and an entourage of friends, frequently went to a gay bar, principally because it was open later than the other bars in the downtown area (although it stopped serving alcohol at the same time). I felt as welcome there, as an essentially straight woman with my boyfriend and others, as I felt at any other club on the strip. I didn't go there to pick up at all, straight, gay or anything in between, but I might have run into trouble if I had. Not sure.

I loved that gay club, btw. It was always tons of fun.

The_Grand_Duchess
07-26-2007, 05:51 AM
I don't have much to add but I did want to say that what I've noticed is that the clubs that cater to lesbians are more freicly gaurded against "outsiders" so to speak.

I would think for a straight couple a normal club and some booze would be suffeciant. :)