Who Should Make the First Move?

I'm old-fashioned. I never would. If a guy likes me enough, he'll speak to me first. Of course, it could be said that if I liked him, I'd approach him and 'chat him up', but...I dunno. There's something distasteful in that for me.

I'd lose respect for a guy if I thought he liked me but was too chicken-shit to approach me and needed me to make the first move so he could express his interest. That's not the sort of bloke I'm interested in.

I've been told I have a 'look' about me that scares men, so if someone's got the bottle to talk to me, that in itself earns my respect - I think, "Brave guy!"

It's OKAY, but watch out for the grabbing. It makes the guys nervous.

Well, I'm a pretty much a wuss when it comes to approaching women, so I like it when the make the first move. In this day and age, I think it's totally acceptable for a woman to initiate any stage of a relationship.

Lol. Remember you create each moment. The stories and misconceptions of gender are an illusion. I do exactly what i feel. I do not see people, by their physical attributes. I see them for who they really are, and like all as equal. I'm happy, i am this way in this plane. I couldn't be anyone else.

It's okay for the girl to make the first move.

But the guy should.

Yes! No matter what comes of it, it's a lot better than wondering what would've happened if you had.

Ive made the first move before i have no problem asking a guy out .. but i do like it when the guy does it .. and i cant go in for the first kiss i wanna be kissed

caren1701 said:

Yes! No matter what comes of it, it's a lot better than wondering what would've happened if you had.

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I'd honestly rather not know. I'd rather be chased than be the chaser.

And I can honestly say I've never seen a relationship that came about as the result of the woman making the first move, last longer than a few months.

scarletpeaches said:

And I can honestly say I've never seen a relationship that came about as the result of the woman making the first move, last longer than a few months.

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But sometimes, a few months is good enough. Relationships are overrated anyway, unless you want kids. I'm older than most of you, I bet, & I've been there already -- I have no intention of having more kids. I'll take serial monogamy.

Oh, and I know more than one woman who approached her Mr. Right first. Some men are very secure in their masculinity. Those are the ones worth having anyway, IMO.

I would like a relationship, but I don't want kids. And I'm not prepared to settle for second best.

I guess this is my filter-out-the-time-wasters system. If a man's got the balls (pardon the pun) to get past that, then he's worth knowing (to me anyway). If I asked a guy out, even if he said yes and it led to something long term, I'd forever be wondering, "Would he have asked me out if I hadn't made the first move, or is he just with me to kill time until he meets someone he REALLY likes?"

I want a man who's secure enough in his masculinity to ask me out before someone else snaps me up.

Yep, I'm still single, but rather that than compromise. I've chased guys before. Some turned me down, others didn't, but right from the off I always felt like I was the one doing all the work in the relationship.

I can't say I've had too many guys, and I've never made the first move, even though I wouldn't have any problems with doing so. I'm just kind of lost in the love field, I'm usually the clueless one, so if a guy was interested in me but too shy to make the first move I wouldn't notice

scarletpeaches said:

And I can honestly say I've never seen a relationship that came about as the result of the woman making the first move, last longer than a few months.

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2+ years here, and still going strong.

I also approached him because he seemed secure in his skin. That appealed to me. I wasn't going to take the chance that I wouldn't be noticed, so I made him notice by making the first move. I am glad I did. He is secure with who he is, and he is the best man I have been with. He also liked that I wasn't afraid to make that move. It showed him I was secure in my skin too.

Not to say that someone going about it the old-fashioned way is wrong or insecure, just that this is who I am.

I made the first move by just kissing my current girlfriend out of the blue.
She took it quite well actually. Now it's been a year and two months. Of the obessive counting of days shows just how madly in love I am.

Or how obssesively mad I am, I can't remember which.

...I had always heard that men chased women till the women caught them...

I love women who make the first move -- take the jitters out of me. I am naturally shy.

Now, did I give you enough hints already?

the pimp should always make the first move.

I pretty much cornered my husband and asked him out. Fifteen years ago. I guess it's worked out okay.

I usually made the first move with my eyes as a signal. Then if they moved in for the kill... I'd play hard to get for a while. If they were really interested in me I ended up with them as a girlfriend.

If women aren't suppoed to be bold and assertive, I'm going to be getting shot soon.

Oh, please!

Women were allowed to make the first move 25 years ago. Or have we regressed?

I'd have been single all of these years if I hadn't been a cheeky little thang way back then.

none of this stuff matters in all honesty.

youre either into the person enough or youre not.

nuff said.

I think it's gentlemanly for the man to make the first move.

BUT...since we live in modern times...maybe the woman could try to be nicer and fail to snicker or glare when the guy stammers a few times and then says "Er. Um. Er. Nice shoes?" by way of asking her out.

PeeDee said:

BUT...since we live in modern times...maybe the woman could try to be nicer and fail to snicker or glare when the guy stammers a few times and then says "Er. Um. Er. Nice shoes?" by way of asking her out.

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I've seen that happen, and I can't help laughing on the inside, of course.

DamaNegra said:

I've seen that happen, and I can't help laughing on the inside, of course.

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I think it's cute when they do that. "Erm... ha...heh... I like... your hair... are you...hungry?"

Sure, I'm hungry. Let's go to the movies or something.

"Heh... okay...*big smile*"

Great. Also, I don't mind nosebleeds at all, but someone else might say something to you. Tissue?