View Full Version : Make-shift Recipes

02-08-2007, 07:49 AM
Post yours here.

I just made dinner (yeah, it's late, but I wasn't feeling too well earlier):

20 homemade ravioli (spinach)
one can of Minestrone soup
one can of German potato salad

1. Prepare ravioli per instructions (basically boil them in salt water for 20 minutes, drain)
2. Mix in the german potato salad. Mix well over medium heat.
3. Discard half the liquid in soup
4. Mix in the rest of the soup
5. Mix over medium heat until everything is hot

Serves 2-4.


02-08-2007, 08:00 AM
Here’s a quick, healthy breakfast recipe.

2 flour tortillas
1 granny apple (or one of your choosing)
2 pieces of Swiss cheese

Put a piece of Swiss cheese on each tortilla. Slice the apple and put on top of the cheese. Sprinkle Splenda and cinnamon, put in the microwave for 30 seconds and enjoy!

02-08-2007, 08:02 AM
One box Kraft Macaroni & Cheese (White Cheddar)
Boil macaroni
Add butter and milk as directed.


02-08-2007, 08:09 AM
pick up cellphone.

call a girl.

tell her you need dinner.


02-08-2007, 08:16 AM

02-08-2007, 08:21 AM
One box Kraft Macaroni & Cheese (White Cheddar)
Boil macaroni
Add butter and milk as directed.


This is definitely my favorite recipe and the most made one in my house.

The other: Hamburger Helper. :)

02-08-2007, 08:25 AM
Here's a quick one my son likes:

2 pieces of bread
peanut butter

Lay bread on plate, spread peanut butter on one slice. Spread jelly on other slice. Put bread together being sure to squish peanut butter into jelly slightly.


Now I can't vouch for the tastiness of this dish since I think peanut butter and jelly is kind of yucky but he likes it! :)

02-08-2007, 08:36 AM
This one has taken me through college:

One package of Ramen, preferably "Oriental" or "Pork" flavor
One kielbasa
chopped onions

Cook ramen, dump everything else in it, cook for 3 minutes. Serve.


02-08-2007, 02:30 PM
My standard sunday lunch:

Whatever meat/veg/pasta/gravy/stock cubes left in the kitchen.

If there's meat, seal it in the pan first.
Sweat off the veg.
Add gravy/stock

Stick in the oven for an hour or two.

Loha! Casserole.

02-08-2007, 02:40 PM
Here's an absolute favourite of mine:

1 cup of water
1 cup of sugar
4 large brown eggs
2 cups of dried fruit
1 teaspoon of salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
1 bottle of whisky

Sample the whisky to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it's the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again. Make sure the whisky is still OK.
Cry another tup. Tune up the mixer. Beat two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it goose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?
Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon the sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the whisky again and go to bed.

Okay, I'm sure you've all seen it before, but it's funny! (and I'm sorry for temporarily hijacking the thread.)

02-08-2007, 05:17 PM
MSPs (Man Show Pizzas - not affiliated with the former show, but in its image)

A package of English Muffins
A bottle of pizza or spagetti sauce (or homemade--I make up a huge batch and freeze it in aliquots)
Mozzarella cheese
Topping(s) of choice

Split the muffins and spread with sauce
Sprinkle with cheese and put on toppings
350 degree oven until the cheese is properly melted.

02-08-2007, 05:38 PM
The Grad School All-Day, All-Night Breakfast

One can coffee
Two packs cigarettes, high-tar

Make coffee as per local custom.
Fill cup to top; no need to leave room for milk.
Extract one cigarette from pack; light.

Alternate draughts of coffee with pensive drags on cigarette. Knit brow; squint pensively.
Hold smoke in mouth for several seconds, without breathing, before releasing, pensively.
When cigarette is finished, light next cigarette from previous cig. butt. Appear pensive.
When coffee cup is empty, refill.

When vision blurs and temper frays, scrounge for a couple of bucks, and order a burger, fries and coffee at the corner grill. Do not interrupt coffee/cigarette procedure. Continue knitting brow as though making a sweater from it - for a pensive person.

Squint pensively, indoors and out.

The sallow, bleary, gaunt (yet pensive) look attained is the unmistakable sign of peak intellectual fitness.

02-08-2007, 05:55 PM
The sallow, bleary, gaunt (yet pensive) look attained is the unmistakable sign of peak intellectual fitness.Excellent.
To think I was worried.

02-08-2007, 05:56 PM
Red Bunny

1 to 2 cans of tomato soup.
˝ Cup of chopped olives
˝ Cup of chopped shredded cheese.

Place in pan and heat until cheese is melted and ingredients are hot.

Spoon on buttered toast.


Mexican Hot Dogs

1 can of stewed tomatoes.
1 can of tomato sauce. (Spaghetti sauce)
1 green pepper.
˝ Onion
1 table spoon of cut olives
Teaspoon of Tabasco sauce.
1 package of hot dogs. Try cutting hot dogs in too

Bake @ 300 to 350 deg.

02-08-2007, 07:04 PM
The kids love this version of chili, although true chili connasewers won't. I like it because you don't have to crockpot it all day, it's just open some cans, heat and serve.

2 cans condensed tomato soup
2 cans condensed bean with bacon soup
2 cans chili without beans (original recipe called for Hormel, but we find generic store brand works just as well)
1 can water

Mix. Heat. Serve.

02-08-2007, 07:10 PM
My version of "hash." Our kids love this one, too.

Cut up several potatoes into cubes. Season to taste. (We like to use Penzeys Northwoods seasoning, some garlic and onion powder.)
Fry until browned.

In a separate pan fry up 1 pound of hamburger.

When potatoes are browned, add hamburger and then melt in lots of velveeta.

Sometimes for an added texture we slice hotdog buns, fry them until golden and add them at the end with the velveeta.

02-08-2007, 07:25 PM
1 pack of Ramen
1/2 cup Frozen Veg of choice
1 Egg
Handfull of Shrimp


02-08-2007, 07:56 PM
1 box macaroni & cheese
1 lb. hamburger
1 8 oz. container sour cream

Prepare macaroni & cheese according to instructions. Brown hamburger and drain. Add to macaroni & cheese. Stir in sour cream. Diner est servi!

Call mom. Ask her what time dinner's going to be ready.

02-08-2007, 08:28 PM
Call Chinese takeout
Cry because they forgot the fortune cookies

02-08-2007, 08:55 PM
Heat 1 package of frozen pierogies in 2 cans of reconstituted cream of chicken soup.

Recline the La-Z-Boy to the ideal TV viewing position and eat while watching Food Network.

02-08-2007, 08:57 PM
Southwestern Pasta e Fagioli

Heat leftover spaghetti sauce with leftover chili. Stir in cooked pasta. Sprinkle with shredded cheddar or grated Parmesan or both.

02-08-2007, 09:07 PM
Seared duck breasts with red wine sauce and candied kumquats

2 1/4 cups fruity red wine, such as Beaujolais
3/4 cup chopped shallots (about 3 large)
4 1/2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
22 whole black peppercorns, crushed
12 coriander seeds, crushed
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons fresh orange juice
3 cups low-salt chicken broth
3 (1-pound) Muscovy duck breast halves with skin
Candied Kumquats
Additional crushed whole black peppercorns

Combine Beaujolais, chopped shallots, balsamic vinegar, crushed peppercorns, and crushed coriander seeds in medium saucepan. Boil until reduced to 1 1/2 cups, about 12 minutes. Add orange juice and boil 5 minutes. Add chicken broth and boil until reduced to 3 cups, about 15 minutes. Strain. Do ahead Sauce can be made 2 days ahead. Cover and chill.

Preheat oven to 250°F. Using sharp knife, score skin of duck breasts diagonally to create 3/4-inch-wide diamond pattern. Sprinkle duck with salt and pepper. Heat 1 large and 1 medium skillet over medium-high heat. Place 2 duck breasts, skin side down, in large skillet and remaining duck breast in medium skillet. Cook until skin is brown and crisp, about 8 minutes. Turn; cook until brown and thermometer inserted into center registers 130°F for medium-rare, about 6 minutes. Transfer to rimmed baking sheet and place in oven to keep warm.

Drain kumquats reserving syrup. Pour off fat from skillets, reserving 2 tablespoons fat in large skillet for sauce. Heat large skillet with fat over medium-high heat. Add reserved sauce and 4 1/2 tablespoons reserved kumquat syrup. Boil until sauce is thickened and reduced to 3/4 cup, about 5 minutes.

Slice duck breasts crosswise into 1/2-inch-thick slices. Divide duck breast slices among 6 plates. Drizzle duck with red wine sauce, garnish with candied kumquats, sprinkle with crushed peppercorns, and serve.

Nothing to it.

02-08-2007, 09:14 PM
There's always one comedian in the group.

I mean, c'mon!

Sour cream with mac and cheese?

02-08-2007, 09:23 PM
Get some Hamburger helper and some ground beef, get some macaroni and cheese (cheddar), and follow the directions on both. Instead of adding milk or water, use 2 cups of toilet or dirty dish water. Then, dump it into the same bowl, put a note ("Here's dinner, assholes" works pretty well) on the table, and storm out of the house.

02-08-2007, 09:28 PM
1 16 oz. can black beans
1/4 cup crushed, canned tomatoes
1/4 cup chopped red peppers
1 clove garlic
1 tsp. dijon mustard
1/2 tsp. cumin (or to taste)
1/4 tsp. corriander
1 teaspoon olive oil
salt and pepper

Heat the oil in a saucepan. Pour in the beans-- don't drain them! Add the canned tomatoes and red pepper. Cook for 1 or 2 minutes. Crush or chop garlic and add. Sprinkle in the cumin and corrianger. Cook for about 2 minutes. Stir in the dijon mustard. Cook for another 2 minutes. Turn off heat and add salt and pepper.

Note: You can either cook it until all the "juice" has been absorbed by the beans, or leave it soupy-- the perfect topping for rice.

02-08-2007, 09:31 PM
I just realized that I actually have no idea how much pepper or tomato or cumin or anything I use. So the ingredients are right, but the amounts might be totally wrong. You have been warned.

(In fact, what size IS a 16 oz can?)

02-08-2007, 09:36 PM
I do what Betty Crocker tells me to do. When she isn't available, I have two good Italian take-out places within a block of my house, and our Chinese food place delivers. (Pork fried dumplings :) )

02-08-2007, 09:37 PM
(In fact, what size IS a 16 oz can?)
It's looks to be about the size of a fist when it's flying at you.

02-08-2007, 09:43 PM
Here are some excerpts from a Guy Cookbook I’ve been casually collecting for some time:

Needed and useful things:

A cookie sheet. It doesn’t have to be a good one. It can be dented, wrinkled, stained, as
long as the stains are baked in. You’re not going to cook cookies on it, unless they’re the kind that come in the tubes, ready to slice and bake. And only if you don’t eat the raw dough first.
Italian Spices – you can get the individual spices if you don’t like to get those rosemary
spikes caught in your gums, but you usually can get a fairly large bottle of the mixture at the dollar store. The mix includes tyme, oregano, marjoram, basil and sage, in addition to the rosemary, so if you have the opportunity to impress you-know-who with a recipe, give her the full list.
Garlic salt
Garlic powder
Garlic cloves
Garlic bubble gum
Garlic scented toilet paper (sorry, got carried away to make a point)
Peanut butter – on toast, it’s flavor changes to four out of five stars (five stars being
equal to the taste of bacon). In a pinch, eat a big dollup right from a tablespoon.
Toaster – Pop-Tarts actually taste better if you toast them. Don’t butter anything
BEFORE you put it in the toaster.
Aluminum foil - to cover every sheet or pan that goes in the oven. If it holds, you’ve just
saved yourself a messy washing job. Don’t put it in the microwave unless you’re at your friend’s house and the party sucks (claim ignorance if the beer hasn’t kicked in).
Paper plates (the cheap ones, not the kind with compartments). Get ‘em by the hundred
and double them up if the grease starts soaking through. There isn’t a more
versatile kitchen necessity than the paper plate. It’s dinner china, microwave cookware, cutting board and ladle/spatula rest all rolled into one. And we’re not talking about the innovative uses that occasionally strike us, and not just in the kitchen.
Butter! F..k margarine. And, get it in the sticks. The wrapper has measure marks so you
know exactly where to slice it to get twice what the recipe calls for.
Onions. If you cry when you chop one, you’re not fast enough.
Measuring cups that can go in the microwave.
A good knife – one that doesn’t bend when slicing through a whopping onion.
A good sautee pan so you can sautee your onions in butter for nearly every main dish.
A large Teflon-coated frying pan large enough to prepare a full box of Hamburger
Helper. If the Teflon is peeling, throw it away. If the Teflon is scratched, use
more butter.
A Teflon-friendly spatula. They don’t leave marks on your woman’s butt—when you
give her that “get out of the kitchen” swat (that’s my story and I’m sticking to it).
Lettuce – You don’t need any of that fancy stuff. Just break up iceberg, thrown in cut up
onions, shake on sunflower seeds and bacon bits, and top with cheddar shreds and dressing (screw the Lite stuff—it isn’t spelled right). The rule of thumb: If you like the other kinds of greens, go for it. If you’re using them because you want to impress someone, buy a dress. And don’t let anyone sneak spinach in there. I hate the stuff. My wife put some in and informed me later, with a victorious wink, “See you ate spinach.” My response—see, that’s why the divorce rate is so high. I said it on the inside, of course. Slipping in spinach is equivalent to me slipping my . . .um . . . never mind.
Cooking Oil – it doesn’t have to be olive oil (extra virgin sounds like jail bait). And just
get the small bottle. You only need a little. No matter how good a sport she is, she won’t let you bring the bottle of oil into the bathtub for a little slippery rasslin’. If you have one of those deep fryers, bless your heart, you’d better buy the five-gallon drum at Sam’s Club. And don’t forget the oil change disposal tub they sell at the Napa Auto Parts store. They don’t check to see what kind of oil is in them. Just don’t mix in bacon grease. That’s a smell a man can detect down to a few parts per billion, from a mile downwind… No, wait. That’s a male moth smelling the female’s pheromone. Make that a few parts per trillion from two miles downwind for bacon grease.
Bacon, and calm yourself on this one. If women learn the power of bacon, they’ll never
again do that thing their mothers told them only bad girls do, to get you to do things you don’t want to do, or to get you to let her buy things you can’t afford.
Pity the man who doesn’t have bacon and a solvent credit card.
How to dispose of bacon grease.

Let it harden and use it as a deodorant stick
Mix it with Elmer’s glue and use it as a dog chew
Use it as a reward for teaching the dog to fetch brassieres off of clothes lines
Smear it on your wife’s cat and turn your dog loose
Spill it on the counter when that fart smells too bad for your buddy to appreciate
Dip your lime wedge in it before inserting the wedge into the bottle of Mexican beer (it goes in a lot easier)
The morning after a night of heavy drinking in which your buddy hit on your girlfriend, soak a piece of toast in bacon grease and put it on a double paper plate. Warm it in the microwave. Place the plate on his pillow, as close to his nose as possible. Lock, then close the bathroom door from the outside and move the little key thing on the door molding to another door (randomize if you do this more than once). Leave the house.A 350o Oven - Almost everything can be cooked at 350 degrees, unless the box tells you
to use another temperature.

02-08-2007, 09:51 PM
Holy crap, I just put on 10 pounds reading these recipes’ ingredients.

02-08-2007, 10:00 PM
Phone Applebees carside to go. Place order. Drive up, staying in car with heater and radio blaring. Thank nice person who brings the food. Drive home and eat.

02-09-2007, 02:17 AM
1 box macaroni & cheese (AGAIN)
1 can either cream of chicken soup or cream of mushroom soup

Make macaroni. Dump in can of soup. If too thick, add a little extra milk. Siddown and eat or you can't watch TV after you do your homework.

02-09-2007, 04:56 AM
#1 - One can tuna, one box Tuna Helper, one box frozen peas.

Prepare Tuna Helper as box states (tuna is cheaper than hamburger, so it gets preference in my kitchen). Defrost peas in microwave according to box. Add to tuna helper at last minute for that "extra healthy" touch.

#2 - Bag of Boil-in-Bag brown rice, can of diced tomatoes (flavored if so desired), meat of choice.

Toss bag of rice in microwave safe bowl, fill with water, and nuke for about eleven minutes. Drain and dump into the bowl (avoiding steam at all times). Drain a little of the excess liquid from tomatoes, then add to rice and stir. Serve with your meat (chicken fingers or fried khielbasa are both good choices).

#3 - Can of tuna, bag of Lipton Rice-and-Sauce (Vegetable Medley or Herb and Butter work best).

Prepare rice according to bag. Drain tuna. Mix thoroughly.

02-09-2007, 05:06 AM
3 flour tortillas
shredded cheddar

Lay 3 tortillas on a place. Place a small mound of cheese in the middle of each one. Slice green olives and put on top of cheese.

Nuke for 30 seconds. Pull them out, fold them in half. Eat.

(Damanegra says I can't call 'em 'cheesy tacos' anymore. So I just call them 'food')

02-09-2007, 05:09 AM
two saltine crackers
small amount of vanilla ice cream

Smear ice cream on a cracker, then place the other on top. Voila, ice cream sandwich.


02-09-2007, 05:09 AM
1 cup of instant rice, cooked
soya sauce to taste
garlic powder to taste
curry powder to taste
1 can of tuna
1 small onion, chopped fine.

Throw it all in a frying pan until it's warmed through.


And a bonus: leave the rice out, add mayonnaise to make curried Chinese tuna sandwiches. It goes especially well with spinach instead of lettuce, and with cinnamon-raisin bread.

02-09-2007, 05:37 AM
Tater Tots
Ring Balogna/Kielbasa/Italian Sausage/Whatever
Frozen Corn

Slice the sausage up (on the bias if you're fancy). Fry it up in a big pan, then take it out. Fry up the Tater tots in the same pan, breaking them up as they cook. Add the sausage back in and the corn. When the corn is hot, it's done.

I'm mostly Danish and there's a traditional Danish dish called 'Bixamei'. (Okay, that's probably spelled wrong. I've never seen it written down.) Basically, you take a bunch of left-overs and fry them together in a frying pan. Then you add an egg. Bam! Bixamei.

02-09-2007, 05:51 AM
Frozen chicken breast tenders you can buy in big bags
Garlic salt or powder
Cream of chicken soup
Pasta or boil-in-bag rice

Cook 9 chicken breasts for five minutes per side, sprinkling garlic salt or powder on each side. Mix can of cream of chicken soup with about 3/4 of a can of water. Add to chicken & simmer for twenty minutes. Cook a serving of rice or pasta during the last ten minutes of chicken's cooking time. Combine rice/pasta with three pieces of chicken & a third of the gravy. Enjoy leftovers for the next couple of days :)

02-09-2007, 06:01 AM
Roasted Pepper Pasta Sauce:

Roast six peppers -- a mixture of red, yellow or orange -- and peel off skins

Cut into one inch strips

Chop 2-3 cloves of garlic (no need to chop it too small)

Heat 1/2 cup fine olive oil in pan.

Fry garlic gently for a minute or two (don't brown it); add pepper strips and fry for about five minutes.

Add salt and pepper to taste.

Stir in 1/2 tsp of hot red pepper flakes (les if you're heat-sensitive).

Lower heat and cover pan. Cook for about twenty minutes to half an hour, stirring ocasionally.

Use this sauce on a substantial pasta such as rigatoni.

02-09-2007, 06:34 AM
8 eggs, 4 strips fried bacon, two double handfuls of store bought shreded cheese and a pinch of cream of tartar.
Separate whites and yolks, add cream of tartar to whites three minutes on high with electric mixer or french whip until your wrist hurts, blend yolks in, mix lightly. In glass cooking dish one double handful of cheese in bottom and crumble bacon. Add eggs and top with cheese, cook at 350 F for thirty minutes. Beats macNcheese and suitable for serving to strangers.

02-09-2007, 06:40 AM
4 chicken breasts, boneless
1 jar of Dijon Mustard
Grated cheddar cheese, as much as you want

Heat oven to 400 degrees. Mix the cheese and flour together. Smear mustard all over each chicken breast. Smother in cheese/flour. Bake 40 minutes.

For some reason, this tastes especially good when I get home from the gym. Not sure why...I guess anything tastes good after I've spent an hour and a half kicking my own ass.

02-09-2007, 06:44 AM
Toaster – Pop-Tarts actually taste better if you toast them. Don’t butter anything
BEFORE you put it in the toaster.

Speaking of Pop-Tarts...when my brother lived in the barracks, they couldn't have toasters. So they cooked Pop-Tarts with an iron. Wrap in foil, iron both sides (not sure how long, I guess til it's done), and you have a perfectly toasted Pop-Tart.

Real men iron their Pop-Tarts.

02-09-2007, 06:45 AM
two saltine crackers
small amount of vanilla ice cream

Smear ice cream on a cracker, then place the other on top. Voila, ice cream sandwich.


Are you sure you're not pregnant?

02-09-2007, 06:55 AM
Refuse to cook and let husband take care of it all.


02-09-2007, 07:02 AM
Refuse to cook and let husband take care of it all.


That's me most of the time!! My husband is a great cook, and I burn water.

With him being gone for the next 5 months, I've had to learn how to use that big device in the kitchen. I've recently discovered that turning one of the knobs creates a blue flame upon which I can actually HEAT water, and cause spaghetti noodles to become noodle-like instead of stick-like. I always wondered how they did that in restaurants...

02-09-2007, 09:28 AM
That's me most of the time!! My husband is a great cook, and I burn water.

With him being gone for the next 5 months, I've had to learn how to use that big device in the kitchen. I've recently discovered that turning one of the knobs creates a blue flame upon which I can actually HEAT water, and cause spaghetti noodles to become noodle-like instead of stick-like. I always wondered how they did that in restaurants...

Actually, that thing is a lighter for your guests who smoke. Really wouldn't recommend your pipe-smoking friends use it, however...

Cheesy Toast
2 to 4 slices of bread (your choice)
cheese, sliced or grated (your choice)

Toast bread (your choice of darkness). Put toast on microwave-safe plate. Put cheese on toast. Microwave until cheese is melted (usually 45 seconds to 1 minute, depending on amount/variety of cheese). Now hurry up and get in here because Mythbusters is already started.

02-09-2007, 09:39 AM
Refuse to cook and let husband take care of it all.


Now wait just a darn minute...

02-09-2007, 03:52 PM
Now wait just a darn minute...


Is there a problem?

I mean, if a husband's the better cook, then why subject everyone to the wife's inabilities?