Gah! Cancer! Right? Well, probably not, but Gah!

Every time I think, "Hmm, I'm going to get sick soon", I end up getting sick. So when I thought, "I'm going to get cancer soon," I began to do the traditional Tsuki freak-out routine. I went shopping for every type of antioxidant out there, but only came back with tea and calcium -_-. I'm not going to make it through the weekend. I can FEEL it, you know? (Coursemit's not enough to get me to put the cigarette down *grumble*)

So now, I'm drinking so much tea that I'm crying dregs, and I'm so sick of calcium that I don't think I'll go near it ever again. But, I must fight on! Or else, I'll die of an anxiety attack long before the cancer gets me.

And now, probably from stressing myself out so much over the fake-but-who-knows-cancer, I swear to God I have chest pains. I know, I know, "You're 17, shut the hell up and go to sleep or something", but erm...Yeah, it kind of hurts. Kind of hurts like it shouldn't be hurting. I'll be damned if I go to the doctor, but I'm still going to complain about it. I know it's probably from worrying so much over stupid stuff (it just goes to show how bored I am), but in case I come up missing, you'll know that I either died from cancer through psychological suggestion, a heart attack, or I overdosed on tea and calcium. Ciao.

tourdeforce said:

I am pretty sure that I had cancer once but I kicked it with Pepsi and Cap'n Crunch.

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I almosty successfully cured my "cancer" with a diet of nothing but General Tso's for a month.

MacAllister said:

Tsuki...how much daylight are you getting? For chrissakes, woman--get yourself out into the sun tomorrow for at least an hour, okay? Just bundle up and get outside.

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Hey, be nice Yes yes, I AM a night owl, but I do get sun. I'm usually outside for about 3 hours (even in this cold ass weather. You think I'd WILLINGLY stay inside with my mother there?! I'll take freezing snow and ice any day) and I'm out all the time in the summer. And yet, I still get "cancer".

JDCrayne said:

Good advice!!!
Tsuki, write three long-hand pages on ANYTHING. Babble if you can't think of anything else -- and do it sitting in the sunshine.

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Does graffiti count?

Haggis said:

And if you see your shadow, you'll be okay.

Or is it the other way around?

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I think it's the other way around. Or maybe it's mirrors? I can't remember anymore.

CBeasy said:

Tsuki, with all the crazy crap that goes on in your life, how in the world do you find the time to be a hypochondriac!? Ahhhh, the exuberance of youth!

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I squeeze it in during coffee breaks .

Ol' Fashioned Girl said:

Tsuki, seriously, if you're taking calcium supplements, the body can't process bunches and overdoses of calcium can cause all kinds of side effects... including depression, severe constipation, and urinary troubles.

And... um... if you were trying to get the benefits of calcium, the smoking (along with ingestion of alcoholic beverages - not that you'd drink at your innocent age - and too much caffeine) cancels 'em out.

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But vitamin D helps! Vitamin D helps you absorb calcium and other minerals, and you can get it from the sun! Plus, I've cut down smoking (I've been smoking less way before my "cancer"), and I can't really drink caffeine anymore because I have pretty bad acid reflux (no, that's not the hypochondriac in me. there's truly an icky, painful, acid problem that retaliates like a beast when I drink coffee)

...Wait.... Perhaps I should be outside in a bikini in the middle of the damned winter to ensure my vitamin D consumption? Hrm....

...I'll be back.

kikazaru said:

As someone who is plagued by hypochondriacal (is that even a word?) thoughts on occasion I am here to tell you that you should get yourself thoroughly checked out by a doctor to rule out physical causes (yes even hypochondriacs get sick) and then when everything is ruled out, get outside and exercise. Get out there and do at least a half an hour a day of hard physical activity (brisk walking works great) that elevates your respiration and heart rate. Exercise works the same area of the brain as an antidepressant, it gives those "feel good" chemicals a kick and it will elevate your mood and help keep negative thoughts at bay.

Dwelling excessively on the state of your health can cause panic attacks, it disrupts your sleep which makes you feel worse causing you to think that you have major health issues, which can cause you to lose sleep, which can cause panic attacks, which can cause you to think you have major health issues (see a pattern here?). Exercise can help enormously.

As for your vitamins, don't take excessive amounts of D or Calcium (as Old Girl noted they can cause their own problems) take a "Stress" Multivitamin (one that has all the regular stuff in it plus extra B which helps nerves) I think "One A Day" makes one but I'm sure there are others. I also found that St.John's Wort (akin to a herbal valium) helped me enormously, however DON'T consider taking it without discussing it with your doctor or pharmacist, because it is not without side effects.

Btw Nicotine is a drug and also causes it's own problems (besides cancer) but I bet you knew that one already.

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Since winter came around, I can't exercise as much as I used to, but I do get at least a half hour a day (jogging is great for weight loss. Woo!). A few years back I had severe depression, and just exercising (and kava-kava; St. John's Wort didn't help me too much, but the kava kava did wonders) helped a lot. I've always had pretty wonky sleep problems. I either have severe boughts of insomnia (like I've been having. Past week, barely 2 full nights of sleep. I'm still wide awake from last night) or I end up sleeping for WAY too long (16-18 hours, dead like a log on the couch). I've done every herb in the book (valerian, hops, and chamomile worked the best, but only for a short time) and I reluctantly tried some sleeping pills (they just drained my energy). Hopefully, we'll find something that works soon. *sigh*

I'll look into the One A Day vitamins. No worries, I'm not taking so much calcium that my head's likely to spin off, but I have been taking one supplement a day. At the very least, it's taken the, "I'm gonna be dead by this time tomorrow!" edge off (holy Bic pen- in retrospect, I'm nuttier than even *I* thought I was....)

I know, I know . Nicotine itself a stimulant which, all on its own, can cause heart complications, strokes, that whole happy field. I know I need to quit smoking (especially now that I'm nice and young. Then,the damn things will end up killing me) but an addiction is just that- an addiction. At least I have the satisfaction of knowing that I mentally beat myself up well and good for it. Perhaps a physical beating will rev my motive a little more?

Maryn said:

Am I the only person who's had a brush with real cancer and finds this pretend-cancer thread distasteful?

Gimme a break here. You're seventeen and you're not taking good care of yourself already. Thirty-five will be here before you know it. Would you like to look twenty-five then, or fifty? And when you reach fifty, do you want to be alive for thirty more years, or throw in the towel?

Eat right, exercise, stop smoking, and let the people who really have cancer also have some peace to deal with it without needless hysteria in the background.

Maryn, who knows several AWers with cancers

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Forgive me, Maryn. While I do understand where you're coming from, and I do tend to take a lot of serious matters far too lightly, I made this thread because this is truly an anxiety that crosses my mind. I have absolutely no intention to make fun of those with cancer, and I am in no way trying to make a joke of it. This is a fact- I have anxiety about certain diseases, and cancer happens to be the most recent one.

I have just read over my original thread, and while I did cover the ultra-sensitive matter of cancer in a non-traditional, non-tragic manner, I don't believe I said anything offensive. Could you perhaps point out to me what you found to be disrespectful? I'm not saying this to be a smartass- if you point it out to me, I will change it pronto. However, I do not intend to ask for the thread to be removed.

Sorry to come off as offensive.

kikazaru said:

Do you think you could have S.A.D? Here is some info on it on this link - sounds like a lot of your symptoms. Apparently S.A.D. "sun" lamps can help a lot.

http://www.sada.org.uk/symptoms.htm

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I used to get mild seasonal depression when I attended public school, but now that I've quit going and started doing it myself, it's cleared up. Now snow is simply snow, and not some symbolic, duldrum-worthy period.

Maryn said:

I didn't see anything that was "OMG, how dare she say that?" More the light-hearted tone regarding the likelihood that your symptoms aren't cancer. Remember, there are people here whose symptoms were cancer. They may not be cool with flippant, you know?

Or maybe they are. Meh, I may be hypersensitive. I used to count how many times a day I heard or read the word leukemia. There was, like, no escape. I came to resent facetious references. ("I'm tired today--must be leukemia" or "Red Cross blood drive? Count me out. Leukemia.")

Maryn, who shouldn't have opened this thread--carry on

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Well, I'm glad that you didn't see anything downright rude (actually wouldn't have shocked me if you did. I tend to be a little boundary blind, as I'm sure you're aware of ) and again, I'm sorry to offend you or any other AWer out there.