What's the dumbest thing your creative writing teacher said?

She said everyone thinks you look like Meryl Streep? Really?

robeiae said:

She said everyone thinks you look like Meryl Streep? Really?

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Obviously he's not paying attention in class.

Don't remember anything he said -- I suppose that says something in itself. But he wrote a book called "The Cheese Stands Alone".

(My business/professional writing teacher, on the other hand, was awesome. )

AnnieColleen said:

Don't remember anything he said -- I suppose that says something in itself. But he wrote a book called "The Cheese Stands Alone".

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I think I read that...no, wait...it was "Who Ate My Cheese?" Is it a series, maybe?

I don't recall anything either. Then again I had Melissa Pritchard for a professor and a few other notables.

robeiae said:

I think I read that...no, wait...it was "Who Ate My Cheese?" Is it a series, maybe?

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No, a standalone. And it was required for the class. The students all thought it lived up to the title -- very cheesy.

Are you thinking of "Who Moved My Cheese?" That one's actually kinda cute. (In a weird business-motivational-moral-of-the-story kind of way.)

"No one's ever gonna believe Han Solo came to the movie theaters in a Trans Am and picked you up to go help Luke Skywalker." -- Mr. Zoller, 6th grade.

AnnieColleen said:

No, a standalone. And it was required for the class. The students all thought it lived up to the title -- very cheesy.

Are you thinking of "Who Moved My Cheese?" That one's actually kinda cute. (In a weird business-motivational-moral-of-the-story kind of way.)

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I read "Who Moved My Cheese?" as part of a series on accepting change. Change can be good. Yep...especially when you don't have bills.

My lecturer tried convincing our class that Jaws, Beowulf, and Richard III are all essentially the same story. I think Macbeth was meant to be the same too...

Change is for suckers. And gum.

robeiae said:

Change is for suckers. And gum.

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...and street people who can't make it in society without change.

I was told to quit writing.

Mine said, "Marry me."

What's the dumbest thing I said to my creative writing teacher?

I said, "Okay."

Did you get an "A"?

No.

I got a divorce. (Which I like a whole bunch better.)

I was told that "we" would be able to make a bunch of money on my stories. . .


"we?"

I took a creative writing class in college. In the first class, the teacher was rambling about what we'd be expected to write. I said, "If we've written other things on our own, would you be willing to look at them?" She said, "Not at all. If you've been writing on your own, you don't know what you're doing." I was nineteen at the time; I wrote my first story when I was five and hadn't stopped writing since. I figured I'd learned a few things in fourteen years of excessive writing and reading. I dropped the class.

"Essays don't need form."

I believed him.

Great guy, but he totally screwed me over the following year when I saw the first of many F's.

"This is my younger brother, [indicating a young man who is conspicuously fiddling with a drawing pad, etching tools, and assorted other things that ARTISTS are into] "...he's agreed to help me critique your writing."

"You'll never amount to anything. Ever!"

She's dead now, too.

I was ok with it until she put in that last word. EVER! Man was that harsh.

"This dialogue needs to be written in complete sentences. You're using fragments."

Because apparently on Planet Dipsh!t, everyone speaks in complete sentences.

Not-so-great writing teacher:
"This is good."

Great writing teacher:
"This is not nearly as good as it could be if you would do THIS."
"And this."
"And this."
Okay, so he had a lot of thises. I paid attention and eventually I hope I'll apply all of them.

Not sure if this counts, but my son's English teacher told the class that stories could only be written in first or third person. My son asked if there wasn't such a thing as second person, and was told "No."

So I sent in a page of a short story I'd written in second, and her response was "Sixth graders don't need to know about second person." By all means, let's keep it a secret from them...