- Joined
- Apr 3, 2006
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So I am lurking in all the political threads-you know-the ones where folks decry Bush and then the others decry the decrying etc and so on. So I am sixty in June-that is the Vietnam thing-I was there. I hate war. Yes I know it is a part of life that we must just deal with. Like the honorable patriot who fights for right and the American Way and all that.
So we need to send more troops? We need to win this thing or some terrible terrorist group will attack the good old U S of A. I do not of course want this to happen-I am a dedicated peacenick-an anti-war kind of guy. I realize also that even peacenicks can fight-after all-I did although I was not a peace-nick at the time-just an eighteen year old kid who thought fighting for right and the American Way-was-well an honorable thing-I still believe this from the bottom of my heart and am still willing to put my life on the line for this country-forget the vericose veins and the age-it is a spiritual thing for me!
So last night while working on writing my stuff-I get tired-which is kind of unusual as I am a night owl and work or do my best stuff at night-I avoid having nightmares that way. Anyway I decide to hit the sack and so I do-unusual all the way around. So there it is again this damn nightmare which I have never gotten rid of. Maybe I don't really want to as this dream always makes me feel horrible but at the same time makes me understand why I am a naive peacenick. So here is the dream
Short and sweet such as it is. Bang-there is this huge explotion. I am face down in the jungle-I have shit in my pants and piss in them as well-scared like you cannot imagine. I speak quietly to my buddy Bob. Bob you alright? What the hell happened. Bob is from Oklahoma-nice guy-my age-with me for the same reasons stated above. Bob is on his back and there is some groaning going on. I reach out my right arm-touch his shoulder-Bob you OK? For some reason I move my hand lower-you know towards his stomach. There is this big fucking hole where it used to be and his guts are starting to blow out. So I start to stick em back in with my right hand-how long I don't have a clue but I am holding em in-just keep moving my hand around his intestines as they sruggle to slip by and keep pushing em back in. It's kind a like trying to stop eels from escaping from his gut. You know they are slippery-slimey animals-can't keep em in your hand for long-they just slime out-that's the way his guts were-like slippery eels. So he is groaning and he starts asking me if I got a strawberry ripple ice-cream cone for him and I don't know what the fuck he is talking about cause I am scared as hell and I got shit and piss in my pants. I keep telling him it'll be alright and for some reason I tell him I'll make sure he gets that strawberry ripple cone-don't worry Bob just hold on I'll get it. So he stops and asks me are you sure and I tell him yah just hold on. Then he stops moving and his guts stop moving and he dies.
I wake up-look at my hand-nothing on it-then I think about strawberry ripple and how I hate strawberry ripple and I hate war and I hate being lied to and should I ever share this with anyone who has not a clue about this kind a shit. Not to say I have not shared this-I have-but with folks who have been there done that. Nobody else-so this is a first.
So I read these things and I think about war and about poiticos and then and now and all that crap and I wonder if it is all worth it. I do not know-but as corny as this all may sound it just makes me sad that folks do not understand that in our world and in theirs over there-well we are not the same and if we are gonna do this thing then damn it let us do it right-as a peacenick-cause of Bob and company and how he died an absolutely useless death and how if he had not died a useless death and the politicos had let us fight the fight we knew we had to to win-well then his death would not have been in vain but it was and that is what makes me so sad and what makes me wonder about over there now and if those kids of ours are just gonna die in vain. See it is the dieing in vain that bothers me-we gotta die sometimes for right and love of country-but in vain-well in vain just makes it evil. Make any sense?
So I am off to dream more dreams and no strawberry ripple-I think butter pecan would be nicer-don't you?
So we need to send more troops? We need to win this thing or some terrible terrorist group will attack the good old U S of A. I do not of course want this to happen-I am a dedicated peacenick-an anti-war kind of guy. I realize also that even peacenicks can fight-after all-I did although I was not a peace-nick at the time-just an eighteen year old kid who thought fighting for right and the American Way-was-well an honorable thing-I still believe this from the bottom of my heart and am still willing to put my life on the line for this country-forget the vericose veins and the age-it is a spiritual thing for me!
So last night while working on writing my stuff-I get tired-which is kind of unusual as I am a night owl and work or do my best stuff at night-I avoid having nightmares that way. Anyway I decide to hit the sack and so I do-unusual all the way around. So there it is again this damn nightmare which I have never gotten rid of. Maybe I don't really want to as this dream always makes me feel horrible but at the same time makes me understand why I am a naive peacenick. So here is the dream
Short and sweet such as it is. Bang-there is this huge explotion. I am face down in the jungle-I have shit in my pants and piss in them as well-scared like you cannot imagine. I speak quietly to my buddy Bob. Bob you alright? What the hell happened. Bob is from Oklahoma-nice guy-my age-with me for the same reasons stated above. Bob is on his back and there is some groaning going on. I reach out my right arm-touch his shoulder-Bob you OK? For some reason I move my hand lower-you know towards his stomach. There is this big fucking hole where it used to be and his guts are starting to blow out. So I start to stick em back in with my right hand-how long I don't have a clue but I am holding em in-just keep moving my hand around his intestines as they sruggle to slip by and keep pushing em back in. It's kind a like trying to stop eels from escaping from his gut. You know they are slippery-slimey animals-can't keep em in your hand for long-they just slime out-that's the way his guts were-like slippery eels. So he is groaning and he starts asking me if I got a strawberry ripple ice-cream cone for him and I don't know what the fuck he is talking about cause I am scared as hell and I got shit and piss in my pants. I keep telling him it'll be alright and for some reason I tell him I'll make sure he gets that strawberry ripple cone-don't worry Bob just hold on I'll get it. So he stops and asks me are you sure and I tell him yah just hold on. Then he stops moving and his guts stop moving and he dies.
I wake up-look at my hand-nothing on it-then I think about strawberry ripple and how I hate strawberry ripple and I hate war and I hate being lied to and should I ever share this with anyone who has not a clue about this kind a shit. Not to say I have not shared this-I have-but with folks who have been there done that. Nobody else-so this is a first.
So I read these things and I think about war and about poiticos and then and now and all that crap and I wonder if it is all worth it. I do not know-but as corny as this all may sound it just makes me sad that folks do not understand that in our world and in theirs over there-well we are not the same and if we are gonna do this thing then damn it let us do it right-as a peacenick-cause of Bob and company and how he died an absolutely useless death and how if he had not died a useless death and the politicos had let us fight the fight we knew we had to to win-well then his death would not have been in vain but it was and that is what makes me so sad and what makes me wonder about over there now and if those kids of ours are just gonna die in vain. See it is the dieing in vain that bothers me-we gotta die sometimes for right and love of country-but in vain-well in vain just makes it evil. Make any sense?
So I am off to dream more dreams and no strawberry ripple-I think butter pecan would be nicer-don't you?