PETE approaches one of the LOCALS
PETE: Hello. WHICH. WAY. TO. THE. CITY?
LOCAL: Eh? Somethin' wrong wif' yer ears, eh? Eh?
CARRIE: The scriptwriter does a very poor Australian accent, doesn't he?
PETE: Who?
CARRIE: You know. The bloke who's writing this bit of the dialogue? I mean, look, I've just said "bloke." Do I LOOK British to you?
PETE: Well....like a small percentage of British people, anyway....
PETE is struck swiftly around the head and shoulders by CARRIE, weilding HAGGIS.
HAGGIS: Rock rit roff!
SPOOKY: The saaaaaaand is buuuuurrrrnnnnning my feeeeeeeeet!
PETE: That low squeaky noise reminds me: We should get rid of the carcass in the back of the truck now.
CARRIE: Right. Well. I'm not touching it.
PETE: Fine.
PETE hauls SPOOKY out of the truck and rolls it down the beach. Also not inclined to touch it, he uses a large stick to roll it.
SPOOKY strikes a sharp rock, near the shore of Icelandic Australia and it punctures him. Suddenly, there is a shower of golden sparks, and then something rises out of the ashes of what was once SPOOKY.
PETE: What the hell? Look, everybody, a special guest! It's television's Rosie O'Donnell!
SPOOKY: It's me. I'm SPOOKY. We've got to talk.
CARRIE: Spooky! We wondered where you went? How'd you get to Australia?
PETE: Iceland, you must have meant.
CARRIE: Sure.
SPOOKY: Lo! This day, amidst all others, is a glorious and special day for truly hath the prophecy been fufilled, for it is written that ye unto thee shall strike the body hither and yon upon the rocks as a man who bleaches canvass might stone the sheet, he works day and night with sweat upon his brow until the rosy fingers of dawn hath turned into night and then he sleeps for a time but shall rise again the next day. For truly, hath thou freed me from that vile prison in which I was so long contained, that wreckless body of a man which is not who I am, for I am a woman and a round one at that, full of life and curves as the fjords of my native Iceland, though ye hath brought me unto the wrong---
PETE: So, the green stuff in that syringe, you're SURE it didn't make the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?
HAGGIS: Rositive.
PETE: What about a super-hero? Like atomic man? Or demolition man? Or something?
HAGGIS: Ruck roff.
CARRIE: It's glowing green! It might make lost all my hair and teeth man but that's about it!
PETE: You are such a downer. And it looks like you went the wrong way too.
CARRIE: Whut?
PETE: There is neither snow, nor yaks, nor yurts. This isn't Iceland! You can't fool me!
CARRIE: Damn. I tried so hard. Oh darn.
PETE: I am smarter than that.
CARRIE: I have a hatchet.
SPOOKY: Hello!? I am SPEAKING.