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Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 04:06 AM
Jeez.

So there is this deaf black girl in my math class. I volunteered to take notes for her.

Thus, the professor was giving me copies of that day's lesson plan. I made outlines on the notes before class, and filling in the blanks as we went.

Here's where my thread title comes in. The girl in question shows up late every day, except for today. Literally, she would stroll in 25, 30 minutes late, leaving her interpreter hanging around outside the classroom.

I find myself with an immediate dislike for the girl. I dislike acedemic slovenlyness. All the same, I take notes for her and make sure they are pristine.

Her response to my volunteering, at the beginning of the semester, was "Whatever." (Well, a gesture conveying this.)

She's 'hollared' at me several times before, mostly accusing me of looking at her (???), and purposefully attempting to throw her off in my notes. (Again, ??? - My notes are pristine.)

Today, she shows up on time. She sees me copying notes from a lesson plan, and immediately begins to make rapid gestures at the interpreter. He says, "If you're copying those notes from something, you can keep them. I want the notes from the lecture."

My reply, as I'm rather sick of her at this point, is an unpleasant "Wonderful."

She says something, the interpreter doesn't translate. Class begins.

After class, I set the notes on the desk in between us. Rude, yes, but we're not exactly on pleasant terms and I *AM* doing her a favor.

She immediately says (Through her interpreter.) that she doesn't want the page(s) I "copied" earlier and ignores the notes.

I tell her, "Look, I take notes from the lesson plans, the text book, and the whiteboard. You get copies of my notes on carbonless paper. If you can read the notes, and if the information is there, you have nothing to ***** about. I'm sorry that you don't have a black note taker. Maybe you should ask someone with a skin color you like."

She says something about my not handing the notes to her; I say,

"Why should I hand anything to you when you won't even look me in the eyes?"

(We pass eachother all too much for my taste on campus, and she always makes it THEATRICALLY clear that she is *not* going to interact with me.)

She says something along the lines of, "You just have to tap me on the shoulder to get my attention." --The interpreter made this sound very polite, but it looked very pissed.

She storms out, leaves the notes behind. The interpreter says, "Well, she clearly saw them. Hang in there, Bart" and leaves.

I pass her in the hall, and I make the sign for Sorry as I pass her. She flicks her wrist at me, which I assume means Shoo. I stop dead and laugh at her, which I assume she understands, and she flips me off. All well and pleasant.

Anyhoo, I get a call later on saying I'm no longer needed as a note taker in 8:00 math--Shock, Shock.

My question, I suppose, is this...

Is my thinking that she doesn't like white people, because she's black, in my own head? Does this make me a rascist? Or are my instincts about her correct?

Also, I need you all to help me resist the urge to say, "Late again, Sweety?" as she strolls in a half hour late this coming monday. -_-

veinglory
10-14-2006, 04:09 AM
I don't think it was necessarily about race from what you described. People act like bitches all the time without using race as a reason and she was probably no exception.

Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 04:11 AM
I don't think it was necessarily about race from what you described. People act like bitches all the time without using race as a reason and she was probably no exception.

I like things to make sense, though, and I can't figure what I did to her--besides waste an awful lot of my time before class on her behalf.

BottomlessCup
10-14-2006, 04:12 AM
Well, she didn't bring up race. You did.

But I wouldn't say that makes you a racist necessarily. It just means you're acutely aware of the tension there and perhaps jumped to a false conclusion. (Or a true one, I don't know the girl's mind.)

FWIW, you could've came to a similar conclusion about gender, her disability, or her being a b****. But you went with race. Was there a reason for that?

clockwork
10-14-2006, 04:15 AM
I concur. She just sounds like a difficult person who could be acting that way for any number of reasons unknown. Maybe she's been dependent on people all her life and she's frustrated. Maybe she has a crappy home life. Maybe she hates maths. The one thing I've learned from my youth work is never to react negatively in situations like that. Be a hero and take the high ground, however difficult that might be. Either she'll come around or she won't. In either case, you can go home knowing you did the right thing.

Kudos to you for helping out though. Stick with it, I say.

billythrilly7th
10-14-2006, 04:25 AM
Stick with it, I say.

Yes. I smell a Miracle Worker sequel.

Or at worst a sitcom.

SpookyWriter
10-14-2006, 04:27 AM
I agree with everyone else here. You did a bang up job by volunteering and she didn't appreciate the efforts for whatever reasons only she'll know. Don't consider yourself a racist because from what you described she is a difficult person to deal with.

On the other hand she could like you and it's her way of getting your attention.

Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 04:30 AM
Sound advice, both of you. Maybe I should stop trying to learn to sign "You're Pathetic."

Anyway...

Me? Bitter?


But you went with race. Was there a reason for that?

That's what's troubling me. See, I jumped to the conclusion that she doesn't like me because I'm white. And now I'm wondering if I'm not an in the closet bigot. :|

Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 04:31 AM
On the other hand she could like you and it's her way of getting your attention.

Judging from her body language, I'm thinking this a big no.

But since I can only understand her through and interpreter, I'll never know.

Question--

Is it rude to ignore the interpreter when I want to ignore her?

Or should I tell him, "I'm ignoring her." ?

=\

clockwork
10-14-2006, 04:32 AM
Is it rude to ignore the interpreter when I want to ignore her?

Or should I tell him, "I'm ignoring her." ?

=\

Do your job to the very best of your ability with courtesy and a smile. Let everything just roll off your back. I promise you, it'll be worth it. :)

maestrowork
10-14-2006, 04:32 AM
Yup, she's just a difficult person. I just don't see how "race" plays here unless you see clear evidence that she treats you differently because of your color. But I don't. Seems like she treats everyone like crap anyway.

My advice? Don't be bitter. Be a better person. The interpreter didn't do anything to you, so why should you be rude to her, too? If you don't want to deal with this person anymore, just say so and move on. Ask her to find another note copier. There's no reason to be petty about it.

Maryn
10-14-2006, 04:37 AM
When I was in school I had a similar situation with a blind student who shared both my major and my minor. Before you know it, I'm reading her my notes so she can record them, proofreading her assignments and papers, and doing other stuff way above and beyond the call of friendly and helpful.

And for what? For being blamed when she doesn't get an A and I do, or when she fails to do the assigned reading because I had a date and wouldn't read it to her on the phone.

In hindsight, I should have gone to the professors, but I was (and am) shy and just gritted my teeth until graduation. I complained to my mom about it that summer, and she said something pretty smart. "You and I can't know what it's like to be her, of course. I'm glad you tried to help her out. Remember, though, being blind doesn't automatically make someone nice. No one's entitled to be cruel just because fate's been cruel to her. She'll learn that, or live her life alone."

Maryn, who'll never be as smart as Mom

Christine N.
10-14-2006, 04:38 AM
Seems to me that she figures since she's got people to take her notes for her, she doesn't actually have to do any work, and decided to show up late for class, etc..

She sounds like a spoiled brat, plain and simple. She COULD show up on time and at least copy the whiteboard notes, then insert them with what you've given her. But she chooses to let you do all the work and doesn't even respect the class or the teacher enough to show up on time. Yep, just spoiled.

BottomlessCup
10-14-2006, 04:39 AM
That's what's troubling me. See, I jumped to the conclusion that she doesn't like me because I'm white. And now I'm wondering if I'm not an in the closet bigot. :|

The town I grew up in is literally, statistically, one of the ten whitest towns in America. We had one black kid the whole time I was in school, zero Asian kids.

Now, I work for a company where almost half the employees are black. We get partnered up for trips, and you end up spending almost 24 hours a day with your partner - shared hotel room, meals together, work together, etc.

I don't think I'm racist at all, but when I first worked with black guys, the race issue felt omnipresent. I was always watching what I say, for fear that something will come out wrong. I would worry about how they feel about working with a white guy - whether they'd be more comfortable or genial with another black guy. I'd notice little random differences (have you ever seen a guy with jerricurls (sp?) first thing in the morning? It's spectacular.)

If you think about the race issue that much, you'll see it in places where it doesn't belong. You blow it out of proportion.

That might be what happened to you. The more you spend time around people of other races, the less you'll notice it.

Jongfan
10-14-2006, 04:43 AM
Sounds like a classic case of snobbery and ungratefulness

Whether she is black, green, yellow , visually impaired, limb challenged or what ever... simple manners

Siddow
10-14-2006, 04:45 AM
If she's got an interpreter, why does she need you to take notes? Isn't that what the interpreter is for?

billythrilly7th
10-14-2006, 04:47 AM
I just hope this incident doesn't turn you into Dallas Winston, Bart.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c190/Felicia_Lee92/The%20Outsiders/dillon1.jpg

"WHY DO YOU BOTHER HELPING PEOPLE, HUH? It doesen't do any good."

billythrilly7th
10-14-2006, 04:48 AM
If she's got an interpreter, why does she need you to take notes? Isn't that what the interpreter is for?

Sadly, the interpreter is illiterate.

It's soooommmee scene over at that school.

Elodie-Caroline
10-14-2006, 05:18 AM
Hi Bart,
I haven't read anyone else's replies, so will just say what I think ok...
I don't think that this is a race thing. I think the girl's either got a chip on her shoulder because she's deaf etc, or she's been plainly spoilt, or maybe even both of these things.
I think you've bee doing her a huge favour and she's very ungrateful; so just let her get on with it and get on with your own life and forget about her, she'll soon see what she's messed up with her arrogance.

Ellie

Bravo
10-14-2006, 05:20 AM
you sound like an introverted individual who doesnt express himself well and youre passive aggressive b/c of that.

i see absolutely no reason whatsover for you to mention race when you confronted her. it's problematic that you let it get to a point where you exploded, but even more worrisome, is that it seems pretty clear that there's some sort of underlining resentment that goes beyond her being unnappreciative.

i personally dont think it does much good to call some1 a racist (ive said that to ppl, but that's not b/c i wanted to change their minds, it's just b/c i was angry). so, w that said, let's just say that there's a lesson here, and if you figure it out on your own, you can learn from this experience.


and im gonna say again: you really should know your own temperment, and gauge it so that you confront a person calmly before it escalates and you become enraged like that.

good luck.

~dr. bravo

NeuroFizz
10-14-2006, 05:26 AM
If she's got an interpreter, why does she need you to take notes? Isn't that what the interpreter is for?
Universities routinely provide both an interpreter and a note-taker for deaf students. The interpreters frequently can't provide all of the details that come out of the instructor's mouth, so the note-taker is a necessary back-up. This is particularly true for jargon-heavy subjects and symbol-heavy subjects (like math).

Bart, I wouldn't worry about the cause of all this--it will only continue the irritation. You fulfilled your obligation to the young woman. You said you were sorry. With her reaction, it's time to have nothing at all to do with her from here on. Don't be rude, don't be friendly. Don't be anything. Some people in this world will be lost to us no matter what we do. Since she has no other ties to you, chalk it up to an unfortunate situation and let it be. If you see her, smile, break eye contact so you don't see her reaction, and walk on.

Eeman
10-14-2006, 05:55 AM
I think it was inappropriate for you to mention race. This does not mean you are a "racist" - but it seems you are the one who made race an issue.

TsukiRyoko
10-14-2006, 06:08 AM
That's not racist in the least. She's simply ridiculous. There's a lot of kids like this at my old highschool, and it IS a form of racism, but sadly, it's usually on their part (which can sometimes mean nothing is done about it). From the sounds of this situation, though, I don't think it's not racism on your or her part.

Aubrey
10-14-2006, 06:21 AM
Oh she just sounds like a peach! There's nothing I love more than someone using a label to get out of putting in any effort. I'm sure the quadroplegic girl who got her doctorate and became a professor would be disgusted with her.

However I do think that racist comment was out of line and completely out of left field. It's as random as saying, "Well I'm sorry that you don't have a redheaded note taker." I don't think her attitude has anything to do with your race, since she's apparently that way to everyone. But i'm glad you stood up to her. If you're doing her a favour, the least she could do is be grateful and make your job as easy as possible.

Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 06:21 AM
Stuff.

Marry me!

TsukiRyoko
10-14-2006, 06:24 AM
:roll: I love the quote you did, Bart. lol.

I told you I'd marry you, but I'm still not seeing the Chinese food. Tsk tsk, gotta be prompt!

:D

Bartholomew
10-14-2006, 06:34 AM
:roll: I love the quote you did, Bart. lol.

I told you I'd marry you, but I'm still not seeing the Chinese food. Tsk tsk, gotta be prompt!

:D

I mailed you the chinese food months ago. -_-

There's a ring in the fortune cookie. :D

TsukiRyoko
10-14-2006, 06:41 AM
So THAT's what I choked on....

Cath
10-14-2006, 06:43 AM
I don't know this girl, or what her attitude is like, but I can speak from the perspective of someone who is (only at times, in my case) very deaf. There's a tangible paranoia that comes with not being able to hear, you don't know whether anyone is speaking about you, or understand clearly what they are saying. Sometimes it can feel like the world is trying to shut you out or shelter you by not conveying all the information. You miss so much being deaf, the aside comment that makes everyone laugh, which loses it's humor when it needs to be translated - or the sarcasm in someone's voice when they speak. An interpreter can only interpret so much, and deaf grammar is very different from hearing grammar, so phrases can be very different.

It may simply be that she thought you were making fun of her in some way that she didn't understand. Or it may be that she's just a jerk. I don't know.

I'm sorry that this didn't work out well for both of you. Please, don't let it put you off volunteering for this kind of thing again - I wish I'd had access to that kind of support when I was going through one of my deaf phases.

WriterInChains
10-14-2006, 07:02 AM
FWIW, I took ASL in school & my first instructor was very active in deaf culture (she was at Gallaudet U during the Deaf President Now demonstrations:)). She's one of the coolest people I've ever met in my life & I learned a ton from her. Deaf people have been treated like children by the hearing population until recently (and there's still a way to go toward equality); I'm not excusing the girl's behavior, but she may be defensive in general because the world taught her to be that way.

That said, the girl you mention isn't acting in line with what I understand of deaf culture (and I picked that up faster than the language itself, unfortunately), so she's probably just a jerk. Deaf culture is warm and wonderful, big on sharing information and outward displays of compassion and appreciation even to casual acquaintances. You did a great thing by helping her and if I were you I'd just let it go and be pleasant but distant from her, as was previously suggested. No telling what a jerk will do next. :)

And, in situations where there is an interpreter present, it's considered rude to speak directly to the interpreter. That person is there to fulfill a specific function: translating ASL & English (which, BTW, is a TOUGH job!).

Opty
10-14-2006, 07:06 AM
The girl's obviously bitter and hateful. Who needs her negativity?

You lasted much longer than you should've. I would've stopped long before you did.

You have the patience of Job. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about her.

Go be happy and let her be miserable, behind, and failing. She chooses to be that way.

Tiger
10-14-2006, 10:04 AM
"Dammit! What kind of a country is this, where I can't hate someone unless he's white?!" -Hank Hill

I guess this quote isn't precisely on the mark, but your story did bring it back to me.

I'm sure that everyone here has had similar experiences--but, I've lived as an ethinic minority in California, as an ethnically Japanese foreigner in Tokyo, and, most recently, a "minority-like-everyone-else" with a mainland accent and "attitude" in Hawaii.

I think that we as a species cannot ignore each other's race, but can certainly get to a point at which we're comfortable around each other.

For what it's worth, I don't believe that a racist would have offered to help.

-D

Maryn
10-15-2006, 04:16 PM
Don't give us any of that attitude of yours, Tiger! (In case it's not obvious, coming from a stranger, that's a joke.)

Maryn, glad all over again to live in one of the most racially and ethnically diverse places she's ever been

RJLeahy
10-15-2006, 04:40 PM
Since everyone's been offering up opinions, I'll throw in mine.

In answer to your question, am I a racist? It doesn't seem so. You are obviously aware of race, but everyone, is, even if they try not to be.

Was her antagonism toward you race-related? You'll never know. If you spent enough time around her and found her to be kind, caring and generous around those of her own race, and angry and dismissive around other races, then yes, you could make that assumption, but somehow I don't see this in your future.:)

So, you tried to do a good deed and got poked in the eye for your trouble. But as others have already pointed out, you lasted longer than many of us. I would have "quit" this nasty person long before I was "fired."

Tiger
10-16-2006, 12:27 PM
Don't give us any of that attitude of yours, Tiger! (In case it's not obvious, coming from a stranger, that's a joke.)

Do your worst... I've heard it all (depending on who you talk to, I guess I've been it all, too).

Sancho! My armor (they're starting to throw rocks!)

-D

Tiger
10-16-2006, 12:35 PM
Uh... FWIW, that was a joke too.

Tiger
10-16-2006, 12:43 PM
My own experience...

There exists a point at which too much sensitivity of one's own situation starts looking an awful lot like prejudice.

-D

Carole
10-16-2006, 01:44 PM
I'm sorry, but minorities are not the only folks who can tell when someone doesn't like them and is being rude because of their skin color. Body language often speaks much louder than words.

icerose
10-16-2006, 08:55 PM
I say let it go.

I have personally known two deaf people during the course of my life that were born deaf. One was an absolute gem, sweetheart, kind, loving, the person you'd want to be around you all the time.

The other was just like that girl.

Some people are sweet, some people are stinkers, you just have to let it roll off your back.

MajorDrums
10-16-2006, 09:24 PM
you sound like an introverted individual who doesnt express himself well and youre passive aggressive b/c of that.

i see absolutely no reason whatsover for you to mention race when you confronted her. it's problematic that you let it get to a point where you exploded, but even more worrisome, is that it seems pretty clear that there's some sort of underlining resentment that goes beyond her being unnappreciative.



i agree. i had to read the OP a couple of times to try and connect her behavior with some sort of racial rift, but i didn't see it. you didn't provide any evidence that she is specifically targeting her rage to you b/c you're white; she may hate the world for all we know. i think you just need to learn how to deal with difficult people in general, and not jump to conclusions.

edited to add: a few people have mentioned ungratefulness on her part, which i think is counterproductive. this girl does not owe you any gratitude, nobody does. it means she is not a nice person, but that's it. this is just a conflict, which you sometimes have to face in life. in this case, you either deal with it, like maybe asking what is her problem and does she always act this way, or pass this situation on to someone who can deal with her.

miles111
10-16-2006, 10:21 PM
I don't think you're a racist. I think you're a masochist. She treats you like crap, directly and through her intrepreter, and you keep going back asking for more.

Why would you put up with this kind of treatment? She sounds like nothing more than another lazy loser who expects something for nothing.

Whether or not she's a racist doesn't matter. That she is obviously a jerk and a total ingrate DOES matter.

Get her out of your life, it'll be a blessing.

Old Hack
10-16-2006, 11:42 PM
If I were you, and I wanted to make a point, I'd continue to take notes for her but only start once she arrived in class.

However, if I wanted to be reasonable I'd follow Neuro's advice in post #21. He's a clever boy.

Bartholomew
10-17-2006, 12:07 AM
If I were you, and I wanted to make a point, I'd continue to take notes for her but only start once she arrived in class.

However, if I wanted to be reasonable I'd follow Neuro's advice in post #21. He's a clever boy.

Oooo.

You so nastay. :D

Bravo
10-17-2006, 12:13 AM
If I were you, and I wanted to make a point, I'd continue to take notes for her but only start once she arrived in class.



no.

that's just more passive aggressive BS.

and more importantly, it just lets the resentment grow and fester.

GPatten
10-17-2006, 12:51 AM
Well, from all that Iíve been able to retain from reading this is, you volunteered; she didnít ask you too.

When she shrugged at your effort, you still pursued it.

When she complained of your looking at her, you ignored that.

Iím guessing, you have a problem with women, because of what youíve written about you encounter with her and from what youíve written in your signature.


Women:
Rejections since Jan. 2006 - 112
Number of times Stood up since Jan. 2006 - 201
Successful Dates - 0

I assume youíre of collage age; you speak of the professor. You should have a female friend by now, or soon should have. I donít care how ugly you are, or how dumb you may be on the subject of women in collage, but I will tell you there are as many women as men who are in the same predicament as you.

Women your age can be as lonely as you and needs someone to hang out with just as you do. Find that woman, one woman only. Be honest; let her know itís been a long time, that youíre not a smooth Casanova. Donít come on as though you are. Just be, you.

Forget this black, deaf woman. Donít help her, donít look at her, and donít talk to her.

Tiger
10-17-2006, 02:56 AM
I'm sorry, but minorities are not the only folks who can tell when someone doesn't like them and is being rude because of their skin color.

Of course, this is true. I also believe that caucasian features need not always saddle people with the constant burden of defending themselves against racism charges.

-D

Carole
10-17-2006, 03:24 AM
Of course, this is true. I also believe that caucasian features need not always saddle people with the constant burden of defending themselves against racism charges.

-D
Um...come again?

Tiger
10-17-2006, 04:48 AM
Compared with ethnic minorities in the United States, Caucasian people get called racists often. I was trying to say that this is not always fair.

-D

Carole
10-17-2006, 04:55 AM
Aha. I got ya. And I agree.

Tiger
10-17-2006, 05:00 AM
Yoiks, and awaaaay!

MajorDrums
10-17-2006, 04:33 PM
Compared with ethnic minorities in the United States, Caucasian people get called racists often. I was trying to say that this is not always fair.

-D

very true. a big component of racism is power; the powers that be in the Western world are mostly white, so that's why. not justifying, just saying.

Old Hack
10-17-2006, 10:33 PM
no.

that's just more passive aggressive BS.

and more importantly, it just lets the resentment grow and fester.

That's why I followed that up by saying that if I wanted to be reasonable, I'd follow Neuro's advice in an earlier post. Perhaps my meaning wasn't fully clear, in which case I apologise--but please don't post me out of context.

Tiger
10-17-2006, 10:39 PM
very true. a big component of racism is power;

That's a succinct way of putting it.

My own way of thinking: I would rather not define myself from the beginning of any relationship as being less "powerful" than the person to whom I'm speaking. I believe that's an ineffective way of gaining respect.

-D

Inkdaub
10-18-2006, 02:42 PM
I'd say...from the information you have provided...the race element is all you. I was sortof surprised by the mention of it in your first post even though I knew it would be in there somewhere. I got a stronger vibe of someone with a disablity being bitter about having to rely on someone else in order to participate in class and being a ***** about it.

Why doesn't the interpreter take the notes?

MajorDrums
10-18-2006, 05:20 PM
That's a succinct way of putting it.

My own way of thinking: I would rather not define myself from the beginning of any relationship as being less "powerful" than the person to whom I'm speaking. I believe that's an ineffective way of gaining respect.

-D

but when has racism been about respect (playing devil's advocate here)? you're right, though.

where's bartholomew? i would like to know how he's going to handle his situation...

dclary
10-18-2006, 05:53 PM
I was on hiatus when this thread first came up, but I'd have to chime in and say from your account, you were the first one to use color as an excuse for your difficulties with the woman. How color could have *anything* to do with it is beyond me. Thus, you are the pigmentist.

Elodie-Caroline
10-18-2006, 06:44 PM
I don't actually know any of you on here so can't say that I know where you're coming from... So to me, although I don't think that the ignorant deaf girl is a racist, I don't actually think that the postee is either, and to say that he is is unfair to him.
If the postee was a racist, he wouldn't have been helping the girl in the first place. It seems to me that everyone wants to jump on the politically correct bandwagon these days and go around telling everyone else that they're racist just because they speak of a litle discontentment regarding someone whom is of a different colour. Yes, the postee did bring up the colour issue first, but that's because he is trying to guess on which angle the unpolite girl was coming from with her own attitude, that's all.

Ellie

Bravo
10-18-2006, 07:12 PM
If the postee was a racist, he wouldn't have been helping the girl in the first place.

that's just not true at all. there are many times ppl "help" b/c it gives them a sense of power.

i personally have no idea if the OP is a racist or not, i doubt that he is, but there was some underlining resentment that came out.

it's possible that she gave some sort of clue to him that she didnt like him b/c he's white, but i would imagine it's pretty difficult to gauge those sorts of clues from a mute person.

therefore, i really do not see the need to bring up race at all when confronting a person about her rude and obnoxious behavior.

she could just be a rude and obnoxious person.



It seems to me that everyone wants to jump on the politically correct bandwagon these days and go around telling everyone else that they're racist just because they speak of a litle discontentment regarding someone whom is of a different colour. Yes, the postee did bring up the colour issue first, but that's because he is trying to guess on which angle the unpolite girl was coming from with her own attitude, that's all.


and there's the rub: you cant guess where the "unpoliteness" comes from - esp. from a girl who is mute.

i mean how could he possibly? when dealing w ppl you check the tone of their voice towards you and towards other ppl. you check to see how they react w other strangers vs their friends.

unless he is just a genius w/ non-verbal clues, i doubt that he could do that w this girl.

when he detected rudeness in the beginning (b/c he didnt like that she was coming in late), the best thing would be to hand her back the stuff and tell her that he wasnt going to do her notes for her.

and that wouldve been that.

instead he let his resentment grow to a point where he started to look at her race a possible factor for the problem. and that's problematic.

NeuroFizz
10-18-2006, 07:14 PM
Why doesn't the interpreter take the notes?
American Sign Language requires use of both hands. None available to simultaneously write. It would be a good trick, though, maybe using feet to write. The role of the interpreter is to convey all spoken words, including questions asked by students, and responses of students to questions asked of them. In other words, to give the deaf person the same advantages of hearing students. Much of that stuff doesn't go in notes. And, so much of the deaf student's attention is on the interpreter, it's hard for the student to take good notes as well, thus provision of a note taker. Think of what it would be like, in a silent world, to attend and understand lectures presented by voice...

eldragon
10-18-2006, 07:21 PM
The OP was taking notes for the girl because his instructor told him to, not because he's a nice person.

Perhaps the deaf girl noticed that the OP doesn't like her - as he mentioned in the first post. He doesn't like her because she shows up late for class everyday.

She sees his reaction to her and therefore doesn't like him, either.

She knows he's taking notes because the teacher makes him, not because he wants to.

Race probably has nothing to do with it. And if he was born deaf, her lack of hearing doesn't either. She just picks up on negative vibes.

Elodie-Caroline
10-18-2006, 10:03 PM
A person doesn't just have to use 'verbal' language to someone else to show them that they don't like them, there's the way they look at you and the body language too. The postee could have refused the job at the beginning if he didn't want to do it, I know I certainly would have done, I don't do anything I don't want to do, especially when it concerns strangers invading my private space.

Sorry, haven't got time for more reasoning here, I'm off out with my hubby...

Tiger
10-18-2006, 10:23 PM
but when has racism been about respect (playing devil's advocate here)? you're right, though.

That's another good point.

I'd argue that racisim isn't as much about respect as are charges of racism. I've observed people of my own race hop up on stumps and demand types, or levels, of respect that they might not deserve were they Caucasian.

I'd also be interested in what Bartholomew has to say. He began this thread by asking whether or not he should be called a racist--not by actually accusing his classmate of being racist.

-D

Bartholomew
12-06-2006, 04:28 AM
The OP was taking notes for the girl because his instructor told him to, not because he's a nice person.


*Blink*

Yeah, necro-posting, but I saw this and chortled.

They can't *make* someone take notes in college. They asked if anyone could I said I would.

Unique
12-06-2006, 06:13 AM
So how'd it turn out? Is the class over or are you still taking notes?

CBeasy
12-06-2006, 06:13 AM
Since Bart raised this thing from completely unholy depths, I'm compelled to respond since I wasn't around when it was first posted.

Bart, you kinda did jump the gun by assuming it was race oriented, because she didn't bring race into it, she was just being hostile for no reason. This doesn't, however make you a racist. It just makes you racially hypersensitive, though that is understandable given that race is such a hot button issue. Also, it seems to me, if I may be politically incorrect for a moment in the name of comedy, this girl wasn't being a bitch because she was black and you were white. She was being a bitch because she is deaf and you are not. ;)

CBeasy
12-06-2006, 06:27 AM
Oh Yeah! I didn't think of that, but she totally right. Do you think maybe you inadvertantly offended her, or is she just a bitch in general?

Kentuk
12-06-2006, 06:40 AM
She has her problems and you have yours. Everyone is racist and you just discovered you have those tendencies too. Overcome them, keep your mind open and learn to understand your dark side.

William Haskins
12-06-2006, 07:22 AM
you're the racist; she's just a bitch.

Cat Scratch
12-06-2006, 08:49 AM
Being race-aware and being racist are not the same thing. Someone who may not have grown up around a lot of ethnic minorities may be hyper-aware in situations with a number of (for instance) black people, without necessarily lapsing into hateful stereotypes or the like.

I've often been in situations where people go out of their way to be nice to minorities in order to better prove to themselves and the world how not racist they are. Again, this doesn't mean their tendency is to be hateful--just that it proves nothing more than a heightened awareness of race. I don't think that is "racist" behavior, but it is something to notice and be aware of.

I'm not sure the circumstances under which you volunteered to take notes, Bart, but I wonder if it didn't cross your mind to help the deaf black woman (in the terms you so succinctly described her yourself in your OP). A tiny dose of, for lack of a better term, white man's guilt. Though now that I think about it, I am not certain of your own race, so I mustn't assume you are white--you only mentioned not being black.

I feel that it was you who played the race card. She could have had any number of reasons for behaving the way she did, and the fact that she was black, until you mentioned it in your statement to her, seemed to have nothing whatsoever to do with it.

The fact that it bothers you is a good indication that you are not one of the hateful people to whom the racist label usually applies. But the fact that it came up at all in your mind is worth examining.

seun
12-06-2006, 01:51 PM
I think she's in love with you, Bart.

Bartholomew
12-06-2006, 02:48 PM
So how'd it turn out? Is the class over or are you still taking notes?

The final for the class is in a few days.

No one's been taking notes for her; the day after the school called me and said my services were no longer needed, her interpreter asked the class if anyone would do it, and there was a really long, kind of awkward silence. It may have behooved her to make her quarrel with me somewhat more private; regardless, I have no sympathy for her. The best sets of notes on earth won't stop her from missing class.