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DeborahM
09-19-2006, 08:20 PM
Playing off the thread Somebody needs a date...let's play I'd like a date, but...and see how many great lines we get.

Here's mine:

I'd like a date, but...

I'm not that desperate.
That would mean I'd have to give up writing time.
I'd have to get dressed up (good thing you can't see me now) and
I'd probably end up as the victim on the next segment of Forensic Files.

robeiae
09-19-2006, 08:24 PM
I'd like a date but...

I'm terrified of maitre de's.

Jaycinth
09-19-2006, 08:27 PM
I'd like a date but...

I don't want to climb to the top of a (date) palm to get a fresh one.

Godfather
09-19-2006, 08:28 PM
I'd like a date but......

...I lied, I don't want a date at all.

robeiae
09-19-2006, 08:28 PM
get a fresh one.
Hey baby, that's a great lookin dress...it'll look great balled up on my bedroom floor, tomorrow.

Stew21
09-19-2006, 08:30 PM
i'd like a date but I'd rather just get.....

er...maybe I shouldn't say that.

Christine N.
09-19-2006, 08:33 PM
I'd like a date but my husband might object. :)

DeborahM
09-19-2006, 08:36 PM
i'd like a date but I'd rather just get.....

er...maybe I shouldn't say that.

Yeah, it's been a while (over 5 years)...memory fading as to what went where, as a great friend said teasing me not too long ago.

My-Immortal
09-19-2006, 08:37 PM
I'd like a date but my husband might object. :)

I've got a wife that would probably share that objection. :)

Stew21
09-19-2006, 08:39 PM
I'd like a date but my husband might object. :)

yes, of courser that too! :)

My-Immortal
09-19-2006, 08:39 PM
Yeah, it's been a while (over 5 years)...memory fading as to what went where, as a great friend said teasing me not too long ago.

I've heard it said it's like riding a bike, but I've got to admit, I've never pedalled my legs like that in bed...

;)

SC Harrison
09-19-2006, 08:42 PM
I'd like a date, but I can't keep my mouth shut long enough to not say something stupid like, "I'm ready to play this game, but I would much prefer you made several errors that allowed me to trot around the bases all the way home."

My-Immortal
09-19-2006, 08:44 PM
I'd like a date, but I can't keep my mouth shut long enough to not say something stupid like, "I'm ready to play this game, but I would much prefer you made several errors that allowed me to trot around the bases all the way home."

Ahhhh....the term "IN the PARK Home Run" takes on a new meaning....

MidnightMuse
09-19-2006, 08:45 PM
So does the phrase: Ejected from the Game.

robeiae
09-19-2006, 08:47 PM
So does: Infield fly rule.

No wait, it doesn't...

DeborahM
09-19-2006, 08:49 PM
Would that also apply to 'Batter Up!'

MidnightMuse
09-19-2006, 08:52 PM
A strike 'em out, throw 'em out double play.

My-Immortal
09-19-2006, 08:53 PM
Would that also apply to 'Batter Up!'

How about...That one was right down the middle....?

(Which is better than 'just a bit outside'....though probably not as good as 'that was up and in and a little tight inside')

SC Harrison
09-19-2006, 08:56 PM
See, that's why my approach to seduction seldom (never?) works, because I get snagged by rules I never took the time to digest. Like sliding into First, or forgetting to tag up before dashing to Third.

I've got one hell of an RBI record, though. :(

badducky
09-19-2006, 08:57 PM
I'd like a date, but I only like the kind of women with whom the credit card debt lasts longer than the relationship.

TrainofThought
09-19-2006, 09:00 PM
I'd like a date, but I don’t want to cut down on my alcohol intake.
I'd like a date, but I am not in the mood to shave.

Unique
09-19-2006, 09:18 PM
I'd like a date but -

I don't feel like wading through the candidates in the unlikely event that I may actually find someone worth going out with.

Wordworm
09-19-2006, 09:34 PM
always trying to pitch a perfect game

robeiae
09-19-2006, 09:39 PM
I'd like a date
Except I have a mate

I'd enjoy a dinner
If I was a tad thinner

A movie would be nice
If it wasn't for the price

But the internet is free
And Google works for me!

maestrowork
09-19-2006, 10:02 PM
I'd like a date, but -

My hands are full

dclary
09-19-2006, 10:03 PM
I'd like a date but...

I'm dclary.

davids
09-19-2006, 10:08 PM
At my age it is almost like-well-PITY-date shakes are nice!

Robert Toy
09-19-2006, 10:29 PM
What's a date? :D


ok Rob that's your opening

DeborahM
09-19-2006, 10:31 PM
What's a date? :D


ok Rob that's your opening

Then you probably could understand the 'I can't remember where things go theory'? :D

Robert Toy
09-19-2006, 10:40 PM
Then you probably could understand the 'I can't remember where things go theory'? :D
Nah..I'm not a big baseball fan. But I do remember who's on first...:tongue

SpookyWriter
09-19-2006, 10:41 PM
LOL! She'd probably end up like my ex-wife and I'd pay her for years just to forget the pain of oral sex I had to endure.

TsukiRyoko
09-19-2006, 10:42 PM
I'd like a date but...

...you're the creepy neighbor.
...I'm not going to be brushing my teeth or hair.

Robert Toy
09-19-2006, 10:44 PM
LOL! She'd probably end up like my ex-wife and I'd pay her for years just to forget the pain of oral sex I had to endure.
Oral sex? Is that when she tells you to go F*** yourself?...:D

SpookyWriter
09-19-2006, 10:48 PM
Oral sex? Is that when she tells you to go F*** yourself?...:DNope, it was more like this...

http://www.extremescience.com/images/teeth.jpg

Robert Toy
09-19-2006, 10:49 PM
Ouch!!!!

C.bronco
09-19-2006, 10:52 PM
I'd like a date, but -

My hands are full

I'm afraid to ask...

DeborahM
09-19-2006, 11:33 PM
I'm afraid to ask...

And I wasn't even going there. :)

TeddyG
09-19-2006, 11:41 PM
I sure as hell hope is ex is not a member of AW

Aubrey
09-19-2006, 11:41 PM
I'd like a date, but...
I prefer nuts. (Going by the dictionary's first definition of date)

aadams73
09-19-2006, 11:41 PM
I'd like a date but...

....I don't want to have to buy new underwear.

....I'm not that bored.

TeddyG
09-19-2006, 11:42 PM
I'd like a date, but...
I prefer nuts. (Going by the dictionary's first definition of date)

Should I comment? Should I say what I want to say?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I am being good today

TeddyG
09-19-2006, 11:44 PM
I'd like a date, but...
I prefer nuts. (Going by the dictionary's first definition of date)

I cant resist
To get to the nuts you got to first swallow the date

(and yes that is being good!)

maestrowork
09-19-2006, 11:46 PM
Don't you get to the nuts before you swallow?

TeddyG
09-19-2006, 11:48 PM
Well Ray..I was trying to be good....and follow the thoughts of the poster...
As you know I am always innocent...
(but then again you may be right!)

Ol' Fashioned Girl
09-19-2006, 11:51 PM
I'd like a date but my husband might object. :)

What she said! Ol' Boy wouldn't take kindly to my dating at all.

Then again, I wouldn't take kindly to HIS dating, either, so it's just as well.

maestrowork
09-19-2006, 11:52 PM
Teddy is as innocent as I am pure.

SpookyWriter
09-20-2006, 12:00 AM
Teddy is as innocent as I am pure.We're doomed!

DeborahM
09-20-2006, 12:09 AM
Teddy is as innocent as I am pure.

Where's my boots? :roll:

Maryn
09-20-2006, 12:36 AM
I'd like a date, but...

I scare people.

davids
09-20-2006, 12:48 AM
Maryn is so beautiful that she scares us mortal-jelly-like oldsters-and probably a lot of you tight and right authors-that is if you are tight and right-which is usually not usually the case-literarty wise we mean-when the right fellow for Maryn comes along he will sweep her intellectually then with said intellect will lust her till she faints-of course in the most prosaic and intellectual manner!

smiley10000
09-20-2006, 12:58 AM
I'd like a date but,

will a date like me?

:Shrug: 10000

SC Harrison
09-20-2006, 02:38 AM
I'd like a date but...

....I don't want to have to buy new underwear.

....I'm not that bored.

That's really not necessary. A girl's underwear is like real estate; the older it gets, the more...you know what? I'm not even going to finish that statement.

aadams73
09-20-2006, 02:59 AM
Oh come on, finish the statement so I can slap you with a fish. :D

Silver King
09-20-2006, 04:28 AM
I'd like a date, but...

Maryn won't have me, 'Ol Fashioned Girl is crazy about her husband, Jenna's expecting a child, Perks is too damn good looking, eldragon would eat me alive if I asked, MacAllister is far too good for me, Birol is way out of my league, Nomad is dancing on the beach and can't be found, Sassenach lives too far away, and on and on...

All of this leaves me with only one viable alternative: aka eraser.

Hey, Frank, you wanna go fishing next weekend?

ATP
09-20-2006, 05:25 AM
I'd like a date but...

....I don't want to have to buy new underwear.


Er...forgive me for asking, but...is this a common thing for women to do,when they go on a date / manage to get a date?

TrainofThought
09-20-2006, 05:29 AM
Er...forgive me for asking, but...is this a common thing for women to do,when they go on a date / manage to get a date?
Yes, if the date is interesting, a nice black or red pair is good bait.

WerenCole
09-20-2006, 05:32 AM
Spooky. . . I am going to smack theHell out of you. . . .with that fish. . .


I can't remember the last time I was smacked with a fish. . . think it was last week, but I was a bit tipsy. . .

I would like a date-

but I seem to smell like a fish. . .

I would like a date-
But Wachovia tells me it would be a bad idea. .

I would like a date-
But I prefer figs instead

I would like a date-
But my masseuse does not seem to understand the concept of a happy ending. . .

I would like a date-
But I'm just so damned good looking that I scare away potential mates. . .

SC Harrison
09-20-2006, 05:55 AM
Oh come on, finish the statement so I can slap you with a fish. :D

That would be awesome! I can't remember the last time I...wait a minute. That is a metaphor, right?

Silver King
09-20-2006, 06:44 AM
Er...forgive me for asking, but...is this a common thing for women to do,when they go on a date / manage to get a date?
Come on now, ATP, you need to get out more and smell the roses and panties and such.

Women who are comfortable in a relationship wear their undergarments until the elastic bands and straps break from wear and tear. Now if you suddenly notice she's wearing sexy things you've never seen before, in colors that nearly blind you, well, you'd better start worrying, because chances are she ain't wearing 'em for you.

Alan Yee
09-20-2006, 07:02 AM
I'd like a date, but...

...I'm really Like A Virgin.

SpookyWriter
09-20-2006, 07:13 AM
I'd like a date, but...

...I'm really Like A Virgin.
http://foodallergens.ifr.ac.uk/foodimages/cherry.jpg + http://www.andrew.cmu.edu/user/ostohlma/pics/Tom%20As%20A%20Young%20Man%20Crop.jpg

ATP
09-20-2006, 09:03 AM
Er...forgive me for asking, but...is this a common thing for women to do, when they go on a date / manage to get a date?



Yes, if the date is interesting, a nice black or red pair is good bait.



Come on now, ATP, you need to get out more and smell the roses and panties and such. Women who are comfortable in a relationship wear their undergarments until the elastic bands and straps break from wear and tear. Now if you suddenly notice she's wearing sexy things you've never seen before, in colors that nearly blind you, well, you'd better start worrying, because chances are she ain't wearing 'em for you.


So… women going out on a ‘interesting’ date plan ahead, yes? And, according to the one tidbit I read a long time ago in a Cosmopolitan magazine while waiting in the dentist’s office, was that when going out on date or new date, she should wear fresh / clean underwear.

persiphone_hellecat
09-20-2006, 09:45 AM
Ray!!

I'd like a date, but first I have to remember what a date is.

aadams73
09-20-2006, 02:06 PM
That would be awesome! I can't remember the last time I...wait a minute. That is a metaphor, right?

Oh no, the fish is very real. I have one in my fridge...wait...no...all I have is canned fish. Okay, your pick: tuna or salmon?

aadams73
09-20-2006, 02:07 PM
Ray!!

I'd like a date, but first I have to remember what a date is.

It's that thing where a man takes you out to dinner and pretends he likes you so he can jump in your knickers. :D

aadams73
09-20-2006, 02:08 PM
I'd like a date but,

will a date like me?

:Shrug: 10000

Now, Miss Smiley, there will be no putting yourself down in this thread. Any man would be fortunate to go out with you. So there!

TeddyG
09-20-2006, 02:12 PM
It's that thing where a man takes you out to dinner and pretends he likes you so he can jump in your knickers. :D

Of course one's world view from the XY chromosome side...would say...
Its that thing where the woman really wants to jump into your pants...so she pretends to love the fact that you put all this effort into planning a date..

There are ALWAYS two sides to every fantasy....
:D

aadams73
09-20-2006, 02:13 PM
okay, okay, I'll give you that one, Teddy :D

TeddyG
09-20-2006, 02:16 PM
okay, okay, I'll give you that one, Teddy :D

Wow capitulation .... I am shocked! :D

TrainofThought
09-21-2006, 05:55 AM
So… women going out on a ‘interesting’ date plan ahead, yes? And, according to the one tidbit I read a long time ago in a Cosmopolitan magazine while waiting in the dentist’s office, was that when going out on date or new date, she should wear fresh / clean underwear. Or none. Nothing comes between me and my jeans.

Alan Yee
09-21-2006, 05:58 AM
Or none. Nothing comes between me and my jeans.

Ah, the puns.

:D

I know, I'm sick, aren't I?

Raiyah
09-21-2006, 06:14 AM
I'd like a date. . .

. . .but I'm too good for ya'll

dpaterso
09-21-2006, 12:35 PM
It's that thing where a man takes you out to dinner and pretends he likes you so he can jump in your knickers. :D

That's when accidents can happen, especially if the elastic's too tight, but the smooth silky damp feel is usually worth the risk...

-Derek
My Web Page - shameless vampyre fiction & other shameless writings. (http://hometown.aol.co.uk/DPaterson57)
Aw shucks, Thunder-buns, you make me feel like a million volts.

expatbrat
09-21-2006, 07:02 PM
I'd like a date but...

Hubs is in Beijing (work) and no one else would be as fun.