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donroc
02-23-2008, 03:05 AM
An author and editor wed
But in their nuptial bed

onestepp
02-23-2008, 05:20 AM
An author and editor wed
but in their nuptial bed
the comic book art

Kerr
02-23-2008, 07:21 AM
An author and editor wed
but in their nuptial bed
the comic book art
showed a putrid fart

HeronW
02-24-2008, 03:11 PM
An author and editor wed
but in their nuptial bed
the comic book art
showed a putrid fart
and both of their careers went dead.

When perusing your thesauruses

donroc
02-24-2008, 04:41 PM
When perusing your thesauruses
For tyrannosaureses

Kerr
02-24-2008, 04:51 PM
When perusing your thesauruses
For tyrannosaureses
Shun the archaic

HeronW
02-24-2008, 05:25 PM
When perusing your thesauruses
For tyrannosaureses
Shun the archaic
even old Hebraic

donroc
02-24-2008, 06:18 PM
When perusing your thesauruses
For tyrannosaureses
Shun the archaic
even old Hebraic
And Cretan wild minotaureses.

A horny old whorshipper of Ishtar

talkwrite
02-25-2008, 08:08 PM
A horny old worshiper of Ishtar
took a prank a little too far

Autodidact
02-25-2008, 08:15 PM
A horny old worshiper of Ishtar
took a prank a little too far
He worshipped Her greatly,

HeronW
02-26-2008, 02:02 AM
A horny old worshiper of Ishtar
took a prank a little too far
He worshipped Her greatly,
a Jonnie come lately

Pthom
02-26-2008, 02:59 AM
A horny old worshiper of Ishtar
took a prank a little too far
He worshipped Her greatly,
a Jonnie come lately . . . . . . . . ."Johnny," maybe?
Went to hell in Gilgamesh's car.

Whew, that sucks. Time for a more traditional one?

There once was a lassie from Glasgow

donroc
02-26-2008, 03:04 AM
There once was a lassie from Glasgow
Who had a single thick eyebrow

Kerr
02-26-2008, 06:17 AM
There once was a lassie from Glasgow
Who had a single thick eyebrow
That wiggled and wormed

HeronW
02-26-2008, 04:17 PM
There once was a lassie from Glasgow
Who had a single thick eyebrow
That wiggled and wormed
and squiggled and squirmed

donroc
02-26-2008, 05:00 PM
There once was a lassie from Glasgow
Who had a single thick eyebrow
That wiggled and wormed
and squiggled and squirmed
Like a pretty boy stuck in the hoosegow.

A gaucho who loved Florianópolis (a city in Brasil for the geographically challenged)

HeronW
02-26-2008, 05:39 PM
A gaucho who loved Florianópolis
said, "I'll never leave this great metropolis

donroc
02-26-2008, 06:29 PM
A gaucho who loved Florianópolis
said, "I'll never leave this great metropolis
The women are gorgeous

Autodidact
02-26-2008, 08:20 PM
A gaucho who loved Florianópolis
said, "I'll never leave this great metropolis
The women are gorgeous,
they make me engorgeous,

talkwrite
02-26-2008, 08:43 PM
A gaucho who loved Florianópolis
said, "I'll never leave this great metropolis
The women are gorgeous,
they make me engorgeous,
They call me their Petite Hippopotamus

Starbuck's just opened in Korea

Autodidact
02-26-2008, 09:33 PM
Starbuck's just opened in Korea,
right next to a pizzeria

talkwrite
02-26-2008, 09:39 PM
Starbuck's just opened in Korea,
right next to a pizzeria
At ten dollars a cup

HeronW
02-26-2008, 10:23 PM
Starbuck's just opened in Korea,
right next to a pizzeria
At ten dollars a cup
they never queue up

Autodidact
02-27-2008, 01:06 AM
Starbuck's just opened in Korea,
right next to a pizzeria
At ten dollars a cup
they never queue up
The combo might cause diarrhea.

[sorry, the rhyming options were limited]

There once was an internet forum,

Kerr
02-27-2008, 01:22 AM
There once was an internet forum,
Called AWland where writers perfor-umed

donroc
02-27-2008, 02:30 AM
There once was an internet forum,
Called AWland where writers perfor-umed
With questions and comments

HeronW
02-27-2008, 03:28 AM
There once was an internet forum,
Called AWland where writers perfor-umed
With questions and comments
gramatical garments

donroc
02-27-2008, 03:42 AM
There once was an internet forum,
Called AWland where writers perfor-umed
With questions and comments
gramatical garments
An unimpechable decorum.

A dancer in old Santa Fe

HeronW
02-27-2008, 03:51 AM
A dancer in old Santa Fe
tarara boom de ayed all day

Kerr
02-27-2008, 04:39 AM
A dancer in old Santa Fe
terara boom de ayed all day
to old be-bop tunes

donroc
02-27-2008, 04:42 AM
A dancer in old Santa Fe
terara boom de ayed all day
to old be-bop tunes
Among Hopi ruins

oneblindmouse
02-27-2008, 01:41 PM
A dancer in old Santa Fe
terara boom de ayed all day
to old be-bop tunes
Among Hopi ruins
From Jan-u-a-ry through to May

A hostile invader from Mars

Nymtoc
02-27-2008, 01:56 PM
A hostile invader from Mars
Had a passion for Cuban cigars

oneblindmouse
02-27-2008, 04:58 PM
A hostile invader from Mars
Had a passion for Cuban cigars
Now Raúl is in charge

Kerr
02-27-2008, 05:54 PM
A hostile invader from Mars
Had a passion for Cuban cigars
Now Raúl is in charge
Of all those cigars

oneblindmouse
02-27-2008, 06:42 PM
A hostile invader from Mars
Had a passion for Cuban cigars
Now Raúl is in charge
Of all those cigars
And all the fierce rum in the bars.

A brow-beaten housewife in Kent

rosebud1981
02-27-2008, 06:44 PM
A brow-beaten housewife in Kent
Dumped her spouse in the River Trent

oneblindmouse
02-27-2008, 06:51 PM
A brow-beaten housewife in Kent
Dumped her spouse in the River Trent
Then hopped in her car

Autodidact
02-27-2008, 08:33 PM
A brow-beaten housewife in Kent
Dumped her spouse in the River Trent
Then hopped in her car
and drove to the bar,

rosebud1981
02-27-2008, 08:40 PM
A brow-beaten housewife in Kent
Dumped her spouse in the River Trent
Then hopped in her car
and drove to the bar,
And made sure all his money got spent.

A shady young fellow called Hal

Autodidact
02-27-2008, 09:03 PM
A shady young fellow called Hal,
a robot, computer and pal,

Kerr
02-27-2008, 09:49 PM
A shady young fellow called Hal,
a robot, computer and pal,
while romping in space

oneblindmouse
02-27-2008, 11:55 PM
A shady young fellow called Hal,
a robot, computer and pal,
while romping in space
tried saving his face

HeronW
02-28-2008, 12:23 AM
A shady young fellow called Hal,
a robot, computer and pal,
while romping in space
tried saving his face
but lost to a brass-bodied gal.

A robot sat very confused

talkwrite
02-28-2008, 12:31 AM
A robot sat very confused
Just which battery should he choose?

HeronW
02-28-2008, 02:43 AM
A robot sat very confused
Just which battery should he choose?
a 9 volt or a D?

Autodidact
02-28-2008, 08:12 AM
A robot sat very confused
Just which battery should he choose?
a 9 volt or a D?
AAA or plain C?

Kerr
02-28-2008, 08:58 AM
A robot sat very confused
Just which battery should he choose?
a 9 volt or a D?
AAA or plain C?
Or the cord hanging from his caboose?

Kerr
02-28-2008, 09:04 AM
A long-legged ostrich named Sally (Oops!)

oneblindmouse
02-28-2008, 02:09 PM
A long-legged ostrich named Sally
Was walking home through a dark alley

donroc
02-28-2008, 05:04 PM
A long-legged ostrich named Sally
Was walking home through a dark alley
She encountered a mugger

Woof
02-28-2008, 05:09 PM
A long-legged ostrich named Sally
Was walking home through a dark alley
She encountered a mugger
Who only wanted to hug her

HeronW
02-28-2008, 05:38 PM
A long-legged ostrich named Sally
Was walking home through a dark alley
She encountered a mugger
Who only wanted to hug her
but she never was one to dally.

A handsome three-headed galoot

Woof
02-28-2008, 05:43 PM
A handsome three-headed galoot
Could turn from a prince to a brute

HeronW
02-28-2008, 05:54 PM
A handsome three-headed galoot
Could turn from a prince to a brute
a singular cad

Woof
02-28-2008, 06:02 PM
A handsome three-headed galoot
Could turn from a prince to a brute
a singular cad
both good and bad

donroc
02-28-2008, 06:09 PM
A handsome three-headed galoot
Could turn from a prince to a brute
a singular cad
both good and bad
And he played fabulously on the lute.

Casanova's best night in Venice

Woof
02-28-2008, 06:12 PM
Casanova's best night in Venice
Was scoring six love in tennis

HeronW
02-28-2008, 06:21 PM
Casanova's best night in Venice
Was scoring six love in tennis
he made such a racket

Woof
02-28-2008, 06:27 PM
Casanova's best night in Venice
Was scoring six love in tennis
he made such a racket
unzipping his jacket

oneblindmouse
02-28-2008, 08:09 PM
Casanova's best night in Venice
Was scoring six love in tennis
he made such a racket
unzipping his jacket
they soon called old Casa a menace.

A writer laid low with a virus

talkwrite
02-28-2008, 09:26 PM
A writer laid low with a virus
asked for soup, but don't make a fuss

oneblindmouse
02-28-2008, 09:31 PM
A writer laid low with a virus
asked for soup, but don't make a fuss
through headache and sniffles

talkwrite
02-28-2008, 09:33 PM
A writer laid low with a virus
asked for soup, but don't make a fuss
through headache and sniffles
tea and fluffed pillows

Autodidact
02-29-2008, 06:22 AM
*I hereby object to accepting the above as a bona fide limerick, on the basis of insufficient rhymingossitude.*

Nymtoc
02-29-2008, 06:50 AM
*I hereby object to accepting the above as a bona fide limerick, on the basis of insufficient rhymingossitude.*

*I second the motion and add additional charges of dysrhymia and prosodicide.* :hat:

Autodidact
02-29-2008, 09:04 AM
Alrighty then, I'm going to just step in and start over.

There once was a writer named Nymtoc,

Woof
02-29-2008, 05:39 PM
There once was a writer named Nymtoc
Who challenged a muscular gym jock

Kerr
02-29-2008, 06:43 PM
There once was a writer named Nymtoc
Who challenged a muscular gym jock
A jab with mere words

HeronW
02-29-2008, 08:19 PM
There once was a writer named Nymtoc
Who challenged a muscular gym jock
A jab with mere words
made him food for birds

Nymtoc
02-29-2008, 08:37 PM
There once was a writer named Nymtoc
Who challenged a muscular gym jock
A jab with mere words
made him food for birds
Now the dude is a torn-limb-from-limb jock.

:D

Some rhymesters who use others' names

donroc
02-29-2008, 09:24 PM
Some rhymesters who use others' names
May not be successful with dames

Autodidact
02-29-2008, 09:27 PM
Some rhymesters who use others' names
May not be successful with dames.
Using a nom de plume

donroc
02-29-2008, 11:05 PM
Some rhymesters who use others' names
May not be successful with dames.
Using a nom de plume
And humming Claire de Lune

talkwrite
02-29-2008, 11:10 PM
Some rhymesters who use others' names
May not be successful with dames.
Using a nom de plume
And humming Claire de Lune
Theft is their only claim to fame

Two lovers named Fire and Ice

oneblindmouse
02-29-2008, 11:16 PM
Two lovers named Fire and Ice (IMHO this line is a syllable short)
Met two others called Sugar and Spice

talkwrite
02-29-2008, 11:37 PM
Two young lovers named Fire and Ice
Met two others called Sugar and Spice
Up on Lover's Leap

Autodidact
03-01-2008, 12:13 AM
Two young lovers named Fire and Ice
Met two others called Sugar and Spice
Up on Lover's Leap
They all groped in a heap,

donroc
03-01-2008, 12:21 AM
Two young lovers named Fire and Ice
Met two others called Sugar and Spice
Up on Lover's Leap
They all groped in a heap,
And experienced all manners of vice.

A grumpy curmudgeon from Philly

talkwrite
03-01-2008, 12:29 AM
A grumpy curmudgeon from Philly
decided critique groups were silly

HeronW
03-01-2008, 12:50 AM
A grumpy curmudgeon from Philly
decided critique groups were silly
he refused to play

Autodidact
03-01-2008, 01:05 AM
A grumpy curmudgeon from Philly
decided critique groups were silly
he refused to play
or even to say

Woof
03-01-2008, 01:50 AM
A grumpy curmudgeon from Philly
decided critique groups were silly
he refused to play
or even to say
cuz he'd rather be strokin' his willy.


A poet who penned dreadful verse

rosebud1981
03-01-2008, 01:59 AM
A poet who penned dreadful verse
Was struck by a terrible curse

Woof
03-01-2008, 02:04 AM
A poet who penned dreadful verse
Was struck by a terrible curse
Whatever he rhymed

Autodidact
03-01-2008, 03:15 AM
A poet who penned dreadful verse
Was struck by a terrible curse
Whatever he rhymed
in pentameter timed,

Kerr
03-01-2008, 04:05 AM
A poet who penned dreadful verse
Was struck by a terrible curse
Whatever he rhymed
in pentameter timed,
Would need to be coaxed and coerced.

A playful young maiden named Jill

Autodidact
03-01-2008, 07:33 AM
A playful young maiden named Jill,
once lived at the top of a hill.

oneblindmouse
03-01-2008, 02:34 PM
A poet who penned dreadful verse
Was struck by a terrible curse
Whatever he rhymed
in pentameter timed,
Just kept getting gradually worse.

His friends thought him ever so wise

HeronW
03-01-2008, 03:13 PM
His friends thought him ever so wise
your great words have opened our eyes!

rosebud1981
03-01-2008, 10:22 PM
His friends thought him ever so wise
your great words have opened our eyes!
He is a liar and a cheat,

oneblindmouse
03-01-2008, 11:33 PM
His friends thought him ever so wise
your great words have opened our eyes!
He is a liar and a cheat,
Which is no small feat

HeronW
03-01-2008, 11:33 PM
His friends thought him ever so wise
your great words have opened our eyes!
He is a liar and a cheat,
Which is no small feat
from his sales, one can clearly surmise.

A happy young dodo named Hugh

oneblindmouse
03-01-2008, 11:46 PM
A happy young dodo named Hugh
Got high on a large pot of glue

HeronW
03-02-2008, 12:37 AM
A happy young dodo named Hugh
Got high on a large pot of glue
he sniffed and he snorked

Pthom
03-02-2008, 12:53 AM
A happy young dodo named Hugh
Got high on a large pot of glue
he sniffed and he snorked
(some would say he was 'sporked')

Nymtoc
03-02-2008, 03:26 AM
A happy young dodo named Hugh
Got high on a large pot of glue
he sniffed and he snorked
(some would say he was 'sporked')
I'd say he was dumb. Wouldn't you?

:cool:

There once was a girl from Dubuque

donroc
03-02-2008, 04:34 AM
There once was a girl from Dubuque
Who won American Idol on a fluke

Autodidact
03-02-2008, 09:41 AM
There once was a girl from Dubuque
Who won American Idol on a fluke
When Paula and Simon

HeronW
03-02-2008, 01:17 PM
There once was a girl from Dubuque
Who won American Idol on a fluke
When Paula and Simon
applauded her rhymin'

donroc
03-02-2008, 04:28 PM
There once was a girl from Dubuque
Who won American Idol on a fluke
When Paula and Simon
applauded her rhymin'
The FCC issued a strong rebuke.

A cobbler named Hugh went to Canturbury

Autodidact
03-02-2008, 09:53 PM
[Canterbury?!?! Rhyme it yourself, donroc.]

donroc
03-02-2008, 10:01 PM
Cobbler named Hugh went to Canturbury
With a bear that was exceedingl furry -- piece of cake autodidact

HeronW
03-02-2008, 10:12 PM
A cobbler named Hugh went to Canturbury
With a bear that was exceedingly furry
"This is my new wife

oneblindmouse
03-02-2008, 10:36 PM
A cobbler named Hugh went to Canturbury
With a bear that was exceedingly furry
"This is my new wife
Whom I wed for this life

HeronW
03-03-2008, 02:12 AM
A cobbler named Hugh went to Canturbury
With a bear that was exceedingly furry
"This is my new wife
Whom I wed for this life
and I want out of it in a hurry."

A wily old Scotsman named McDuff

donroc
03-03-2008, 02:59 AM
A wily old Scotsman named McDuff
Was dour, grumpy and gruff

onestepp
03-03-2008, 09:47 AM
A wily old Scotsman named McDuf
was dour, grumpy and duff
from the stale green ale

HeronW
03-03-2008, 03:50 PM
A wily old Scotsman named McDuf
was dour, grumpy and duff
from the stale green ale
he drank from a pail

Kerr
03-03-2008, 04:20 PM
A wily old Scotsman named McDuf
was dour, grumpy and gruff
from the stale green ale
he drank from a pail
till he'd nap and sleep it all off.

When the Irish come visit the Scotts

oneblindmouse
03-03-2008, 04:27 PM
When the Irish come visit the Scots
The whiskey is brought out in pots

donroc
03-03-2008, 05:13 PM
When the Irish come visit the Scots
The whiskey is brought out in pots
The contest is vicious

PattiTheWicked
03-03-2008, 05:41 PM
When the Irish come visit the Scots
The whiskey is brought out in pots
The contest is vicious
and the haggis delicious

HeronW
03-03-2008, 07:35 PM
When the Irish come visit the Scots
The whiskey is brought out in pots
The contest is vicious
and the haggis delicious
the participents pass out in lots.

When storming the castle McDougall

Woof
03-03-2008, 08:03 PM
When storming the castle McDougall
The invaders decided to google

talkwrite
03-03-2008, 08:13 PM
When storming the castle McDougall
The invaders decided to google
But without their WiFi

Autodidact
03-03-2008, 08:44 PM
When storming the castle McDougall
The invaders decided to google
But without their WiFi
the Scotsmen were hog-tied,

Pthom
03-04-2008, 01:15 AM
When storming the castle McDougall
The invaders decided to google
But without their WiFi
the Scots were hog-tied, adjusted for meter
And they lost because they were too frugal.

There once was an internet guru

Autodidact
03-04-2008, 02:32 AM
There once was an internet guru,
who went by "Lieutenant Uhuru,"

talkwrite
03-04-2008, 02:42 AM
There once was an internet guru,
who went by "Lieutenant Uhuru,"
A mouse at his finger

ona
03-04-2008, 02:42 AM
(too late)

ona
03-04-2008, 02:44 AM
There once was an internet guru,
who went by "Lieutenant Uhuru,"
A mouse at his finger,
All day he would linger

Autodidact
03-04-2008, 03:04 AM
There once was an internet guru,
who went by "Lieutenant Uhuru,"
A mouse at his finger,
All day he would linger
all the while singing, "Cucuru."


One week on American Idol,

Kerr
03-04-2008, 08:19 AM
One week on American Idol,
the youngest singer sang with such style

HeronW
03-04-2008, 03:09 PM
One week on American Idol,
the youngest singer sang with such style
the judges just cheered

ona
03-04-2008, 03:56 PM
One week on American Idol,
the youngest singer sang with such style
the judges just cheered
Wondering how she'd been reared
__________________

talkwrite
03-04-2008, 08:23 PM
One week on American Idol,
the youngest singer sang with such style
the judges just cheered
Wondering how she'd been reared
Made Paula down one more Midol

A speech writer could not decide

oneblindmouse
03-04-2008, 08:26 PM
A speech writer could not decide
To lambast or just to deride

HeronW
03-04-2008, 08:37 PM
A speech writer could not decide
To lambast or just to deride
she scribbled and sighed

Autodidact
03-04-2008, 10:37 PM
A speech writer could not decide
To lambast or just to deride
she scribbled and sighed,
and finally lied,

donroc
03-04-2008, 10:42 PM
A speech writer could not decide
To lambast or just to deride
she scribbled and sighed,
and finally lied,
And rambled with words that were snide.

A surgeon from old Mandalay

oneblindmouse
03-04-2008, 10:45 PM
A surgeon from old Mandalay
Was sharpening his knives one fine day

HeronW
03-04-2008, 11:00 PM
A surgeon from old Mandalay
Was sharpening his knives one fine day
he prepared to chop

rosebud1981
03-04-2008, 11:01 PM
A surgeon from old Mandalay
Was sharpening his knives one fine day
he prepared to chop
Hack, slit and crop

donroc
03-04-2008, 11:02 PM
A surgeon from old Mandalay
Was sharpening his knives one fine day
he prepared to chop
Slice, carve, and lop

oneblindmouse
03-04-2008, 11:12 PM
A surgeon from old Mandalay
Was sharpening his knives one fine day
he prepared to chop
Hack, slit and crop
Not wanting the patient to slay.

On Sunday we go to the polls

rosebud1981
03-04-2008, 11:15 PM
On Sunday we go to the polls
To vote for the hairy old trolls

oneblindmouse
03-04-2008, 11:17 PM
On Sunday we go to the polls
To vote for the hairy old trolls.
The experts predict

Autodidact
03-05-2008, 01:29 AM
On Sunday we go to the polls
To vote for the hairy old trolls.
The experts predict
we're sure to evict

HeronW
03-05-2008, 01:55 AM
On Sunday we go to the polls
To vote for the hairy old trolls.
The experts predict
we're sure to evict
and be left with nothing but holes.

The candidate tried to impress

Pthom
03-05-2008, 03:13 AM
The candidate tried to impress
By putting on Hillary's dress.

Nymtoc
03-05-2008, 03:29 AM
The candidate tried to impress
By putting on Hillary's dress,
But voters just giggled

oneblindmouse
03-05-2008, 11:57 AM
The candidate tried to impress
By putting on Hillary's dress,
But voters just giggled
While Hillary wriggled

ona
03-05-2008, 02:12 PM
The candidate tried to impress
By putting on Hillary's dress,
But voters just giggled
While Hillary wriggled
In a palpable state of distress



Australia has leaders afresh

oneblindmouse
03-05-2008, 02:18 PM
Australia has leaders afresh
Who wish to untangle the mesh

ona
03-05-2008, 02:37 PM
Australia has leaders afresh
Who wish to untangle the mesh
But the proof of the pudding

oneblindmouse
03-05-2008, 06:26 PM
Australia has leaders afresh
Who wish to untangle the mesh
But the proof of the pudding
Is who did the hooding?

ona
03-05-2008, 09:41 PM
Australia has leaders afresh
Who wish to untangle the mesh
But the proof of the pudding
Is who did the hooding?
And who will want their pound of flesh ?

Young Violet was fond of gardenias
__________________

Autodidact
03-05-2008, 09:46 PM
Young Violet was fond of gardenias,
roses, pansies and zinnias,

Woof
03-05-2008, 09:47 PM
Young Violet was fond of gardenias
Though she didn't much care for seniors

donroc
03-05-2008, 09:49 PM
Young Violet was fond of gardenias
Though she didn't much care for seniors
The problem with geezers

Woof
03-05-2008, 09:51 PM
Young Violet was fond of gardenias
Though she didn't much care for seniors
The problem with geezers
Is that they're all wheezers

otterman
03-05-2008, 09:53 PM
Young Violet was fond of gardenias
Though she didn't much care for seniors
The problem with geezers
Is that they're all wheezers
And have opinions that often demean yours

Nymtoc
03-05-2008, 10:00 PM
Line? :D

otterman
03-05-2008, 10:07 PM
(sorry)

A fish is an awful good swimmer,

oneblindmouse
03-05-2008, 10:19 PM
A fish is an awful good swimmer
Despite having brains so much dimmer

Woof
03-05-2008, 10:20 PM
A fish is an awful good swimmer
Despite having brains so much dimmer
He gets stuffed to the gills

oneblindmouse
03-05-2008, 10:25 PM
A fish is an awful good swimmer
Despite having brains so much dimmer
He gets stuffed to the gills
But no thanks and no frills

Woof
03-05-2008, 10:35 PM
A fish is an awful good swimmer
Despite having brains so much dimmer
He gets stuffed to the gills
But no thanks and no frills
He's no use but to kill and to simmer.


I thought I heard a nightingale

otterman
03-05-2008, 10:41 PM
I thought I heard a nightingale,
But I know sometimes my ears can fail,

Woof
03-05-2008, 10:58 PM
I thought I heard a nightingale,
But I know sometimes my ears can fail,
I hear birds in my head

HeronW
03-06-2008, 01:24 AM
I thought I heard a nightingale,
But I know sometimes my ears can fail,
I hear birds in my head
chirping when I'm in bed

Woof
03-06-2008, 01:31 AM
I thought I heard a nightingale,
But I know sometimes my ears can fail,
I hear birds in my head
chirping when I'm in bed
Or is it my wife wagging her tail?


There once was a lurker of threads

donroc
03-06-2008, 01:33 AM
There once was a lurker of threads
Whose hair was Medusa-like dreads

Woof
03-06-2008, 01:36 AM
There once was a lurker of threads
Whose hair was Medusa-like dreads
To look at her eyes

oneblindmouse
03-06-2008, 01:49 AM
There once was a lurker of threads
Whose hair was Medusa-like dreads
To look at her eyes
Amidst all the flies

Kerr
03-06-2008, 04:11 AM
There once was a lurker of threads
Whose hair was Medusa-like dreads
To look at her eyes
Amidst all the flies
Would make all your writings get read.

A writer from Ol' Nantucket

otterman
03-06-2008, 04:14 AM
A writer from Ol' Nantucket,
Kept her MS in a bucket,

donroc
03-06-2008, 04:15 AM
A writer from Ol' Nantucket,
Kept her MS in a bucket,
She said with a grin --- sorry, could not resist

oneblindmouse
03-06-2008, 12:08 PM
A writer from ol' Nantucket
Kept her MS in a bucket,
She said with a grin
"I just soak it in gin

Woof
03-06-2008, 05:05 PM
A writer from ol' Nantucket
Kept her MS in a bucket,
She said with a grin
"I just soak it in gin
If it don't get read, then f**k it!"


A poet who wrote verse in blood

Kerr
03-06-2008, 05:33 PM
A poet who wrote verse in blood
O'er the eyes of an errant spud

oneblindmouse
03-06-2008, 06:23 PM
A poet who wrote verse in blood
O'er the eyes of an errant spud
Fell in love with a pea

rosebud1981
03-06-2008, 06:44 PM
A poet who wrote verse in blood
O'er the eyes of an errant spud
Fell in love with a pea
But dumped him for me

ona
03-06-2008, 07:53 PM
A poet who wrote verse in blood
O'er the eyes of an errant spud
Fell in love with a pea
But dumped him for me
And then wrote you're a bit of a dud :).

A vendor of noodles named Liu Feng

oneblindmouse
03-06-2008, 07:59 PM
A vendor of noodles, Liu Feng
Liked eating them dipped in ginseng

talkwrite
03-06-2008, 10:09 PM
A vendor of noodles, Liu Feng
Liked eating them dipped in ginseng
She added Tofu

oneblindmouse
03-06-2008, 10:21 PM
A vendor of noodles, Liu Feng
Liked eating them dipped in ginseng
She added Tofu
Which made them turn blue

HeronW
03-07-2008, 03:15 AM
A vendor of noodles, Liu Feng
Liked eating them dipped in ginseng
She added Tofu
Which made them turn blue
which then caused both her ears to ring.

A hustler of ladies called the Klonk

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 03:25 AM
A hustler of ladies called the Klonk,
would play them some David Van Ronk,

HeronW
03-07-2008, 03:46 AM
A hustler of ladies called the Klonk,
would play them some David Van Ronk,
he promised their pay

otterman
03-07-2008, 03:48 AM
A hustler of ladies called the Klonk,
would play them some David Van Ronk,
he promised their pay
For one little lay

Woof
03-07-2008, 05:32 AM
A hustler of ladies called the Klonk,
would play them some David Van Ronk,
he promised their pay
For one little lay
It turned to a non-ending bonk.



A woman tripped into a grave

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 05:53 AM
A woman tripped into a grave,
whilst seeing the sights in Belgrave

Woof
03-07-2008, 05:54 AM
A woman tripped into a grave,
whilst seeing the sights in Belgrave
She fell on a skull

ona
03-07-2008, 06:01 AM
A woman tripped into a grave,
whilst seeing the sights in Belgrave
She fell on a skull,
Cried, "This town sure ain't dull !"

Pthom
03-07-2008, 06:22 AM
A woman tripped into a grave,
Whilst seeing the sights in Belgrave
She fell on a skull,
Cried, "This town ain't dull !" [struck "sure" to preserve limerick meter]
Climbed out, wandered off feeling brave.

We really should not meet like this.

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 07:00 AM
"We really should not meet like this,"
said she, as she gave her a kiss,

donroc
03-07-2008, 07:16 AM
"We really should not meet like this,"
said she, as she gave her a kiss,
My husband's so plebian ---- how's that for an easy setup?

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 08:17 AM
[Why, because lesbian rhymes with plesbian?]

oneblindmouse
03-07-2008, 03:21 PM
"We really should not meet like this,"
said she, as she gave her a kiss,
My husband's so plebian,
But I'm now a lesbian

Woof
03-07-2008, 05:12 PM
"We really should not meet like this,"
said she, as she gave her a kiss,
My husband's so plebian,
But I'm now a lesbian
And as for guys, I'll take a Miss"



A girl with a preference for whips

Nymtoc
03-07-2008, 05:15 PM
A girl with a preference for whips
Was known for her ruby-red lips

Woof
03-07-2008, 05:17 PM
A girl with a preference for whips
Was known for her ruby-red lips
She smacked 'em and more

donroc
03-07-2008, 05:19 PM
A girl with a preference for whips
Was known for her ruby-red lips
She smacked 'em and more
Like a Jolie-clone whore

Woof
03-07-2008, 05:28 PM
A girl with a preference for whips
Was known for her ruby-red lips
She smacked 'em and more
Like a Jolie-clone whore
And blistered their naughty bad hips.



A writer who thought he was God

oneblindmouse
03-07-2008, 07:07 PM
A writer who thought he was God
was bothered when told that was odd

talkwrite
03-07-2008, 07:35 PM
A writer who thought he was God
was bothered when told that was odd
Once published by PA

Kurlumbenus
03-07-2008, 11:12 PM
A writer who thought he was God
was bothered when told that was odd
Once published by PA
They'd all rue the day

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 11:20 PM
A writer who thought he was God
was bothered when told that was odd
Once published by PA
They'd all rue the day
He smote them with whip and with rod.


There once was a Wyoming democrat,

Kurlumbenus
03-07-2008, 11:24 PM
There once was a Wyoming democrat,
Whose son was an unflinching plutocrat.

Autodidact
03-07-2008, 11:49 PM
There once was a Wyoming democrat,
Whose son was an unflinching plutocrat.
One voted Republican,

Kurlumbenus
03-07-2008, 11:54 PM
There once was a Wyoming democrat,
Whose son was an unflinching plutocrat.
One voted Republican,
but Ron Paul didn't win,

talkwrite
03-08-2008, 12:06 AM
There once was a Wyoming democrat,
Whose son was an unflinching plutocrat.
One voted Republican,
but Ron Paul didn't win,
now he rides the range with Barack

A blue norther struck Hawaii

Kurlumbenus
03-08-2008, 12:45 AM
A blue norther struck Hawaii
predicted by a genius from M.I.T.

donroc
03-08-2008, 01:32 AM
A blue norther struck Hawaii
predicted by a genius from M.I.T.
While volcanoes erupted

Kurlumbenus
03-08-2008, 01:34 AM
A blue norther struck Hawaii
predicted by a genius from M.I.T.
While volcanoes erupted,
his thesis interrupted

Autodidact
03-08-2008, 03:17 AM
A blue norther struck Hawaii
predicted by a genius from M.I.T.
While volcanoes erupted,
his thesis interrupted,
He cried, "Oh," also "U, A, and I-E."

There once were some procrastinators,

donroc
03-08-2008, 03:35 AM
There once were some procrastinators
Who happened to be gladiators

otterman
03-08-2008, 03:45 AM
There once were some procrastinators
Who happened to be gladiators,
They always delayed,

Autodidact
03-08-2008, 06:54 AM
There once were some procrastinators
Who happened to be gladiators,
They always delayed,
before they got slayed,

ona
03-08-2008, 07:57 AM
There once were some procrastinators
Who happened to be gladiators,
They always delayed,
before they got slayed,
With hopes that the blows would abate

A ginger-haired teacher from Hobart ( :) )

onestepp
03-08-2008, 08:05 AM
A ginger haired teacher from Hobart
made one dainty blueberry tart

ona
03-08-2008, 11:09 AM
A ginger haired teacher from Hobart
made one dainty blueberry tart
To nibble in class ( :) :) )

oneblindmouse
03-08-2008, 02:20 PM
A ginger haired teacher from Hobart
made one dainty blueberry tart
to nibble in class
while drinking a glass

ona
03-08-2008, 06:07 PM
A ginger haired teacher from Hobart
made one dainty blueberry tart
to nibble in class
while drinking a glass
of hemlock, all crude things to part


A tall, dipsy seamstress from Darwin

oneblindmouse
03-08-2008, 06:19 PM
A tall, dipsy seamstress from Darwin
With long pointy ears like fair Arwen

otterman
03-08-2008, 07:10 PM
A tall, dipsy seamstress from Darwin,
With long pointy ears like fair Arwen,
Was feeling down under,

ona
03-08-2008, 07:31 PM
#6232
otterman
Word Voyeur




Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Lothlorien
Posts: 321
A tall, dipsy seamstress from Darwin,
With long pointy ears like fair Arwen,
Was feeling down under,
Her senses a-wonder

Autodidact
03-08-2008, 11:44 PM
A tall, dipsy seamstress from Darwin,
With long pointy ears like fair Arwen,
Was feeling down under,
Her senses a-wonder
She wandered so near and so far-win.


These rhymes and these meters both suck,

kellytijer
03-08-2008, 11:52 PM
These rhymes and these meters both suck,
But I really just don't give a pluck

HeronW
03-09-2008, 02:36 AM
These rhymes and these meters both suck,
But I really just don't give a pluck
just type anything

Autodidact
03-09-2008, 03:55 AM
These rhymes and these meters both suck,
But I really just don't give a pluck
just type anything
ring-a-ding-ding,

Kerr
03-09-2008, 04:34 AM
These rhymes and these meters both suck,
But I really just don't give a pluck
just type anything
ring-a-ding-ding,
and make something up if you're stuck.

Yea! The red-winged blackbirds are back!

kellytijer
03-09-2008, 06:24 AM
Yea! The red-winged blackbirds are back!
I will hang them all up with thumbtacks!

Autodidact
03-09-2008, 07:06 AM
These rhymes and these meters both suck,
But I really just don't give a pluck
just type anything
ring-a-ding-ding,
and make something up if you're stuck.


I'm shocked that limerick was finished without expletive, and don't know whether that is a good sign or a bad one.

Autodidact
03-09-2008, 07:07 AM
Yea! The red-winged blackbirds are back!
I will hang them all up with thumbtacks!
Or baked in a pie,

kellytijer
03-09-2008, 08:30 AM
Yea! The red-winged blackbirds are back!
I will hang them all up with thumbtacks!
Or baked in a pie,
With a crust made of rye,

donroc
03-09-2008, 08:34 AM
Yea! The red-winged blackbirds are back!
I will hang them all up with thumbtacks!
Or baked in a pie,
With a crust made of rye,
And a smidgeon of gut German Zweiback,

A lonely old Templar in France

Autodidact
03-09-2008, 08:56 AM
A lonely old Templar in France
went crusading without any pants

kimmeunier
03-09-2008, 09:57 AM
A lonely old Templar in France
went crusading without any pants
Free to roam as he pleased

oneblindmouse
03-09-2008, 02:13 PM
A lonely old Templar in France
went crusading without any pants
Free to roam as he pleased
He tempted and teased

HeronW
03-09-2008, 05:25 PM
A lonely old Templar in France
went crusading without any pants
Free to roam as he pleased
He tempted and teased
he ended as dinner for ants.

A boisterous young nun from Cathay

donroc
03-09-2008, 05:48 PM
A boisterous young nun from Cathay
Made a road trip to old Mandalay

oneblindmouse
03-09-2008, 06:19 PM
A boisterous young nun from Cathay
made a road trip to old Mandalay
driving all hell for leather

rosebud1981
03-09-2008, 11:03 PM
A boisterous young nun from Cathay
made a road trip to old Mandalay
driving all hell for leather
To a man who would bed her

Kerr
03-10-2008, 12:24 AM
A boisterous young nun from Cathay
made a road trip to old Mandalay
driving all hell for leather
To a man who would bed her
She said, "Man, come do me today!"

Up north where the grizzly bears live

HeronW
03-10-2008, 12:46 AM
A boisterous young nun from Cathay
made a road trip to old Mandalay
driving all hell for leather
To a man who would bed her
for a one night roll in the hay.

A chipper old gent from Akron

Autodidact
03-10-2008, 05:00 AM
Up north where the grizzly bears live,
I captured a trout in a sieve,

Pthom
03-10-2008, 10:49 AM
Up north where the grizzly bears live,
I captured a trout in a sieve.
But the fish got away

-and-

A chipper old gent from Akron
Wore suits made only from Dacron®

oneblindmouse
03-10-2008, 02:23 PM
Up north where the grizzly bears live,
I captured a trout in a sieve.
But the fish got away
Singing "Hey diddly day!"

Autodidact
03-10-2008, 07:25 PM
Up north where the grizzly bears live,
I captured a trout in a sieve.
But the fish got away
Singing "Hey diddly day!"
Not a care nor a damn did it give.


One Monday while typing these words,

rosebud1981
03-10-2008, 09:17 PM
One Monday while typing these words
I was attacked by flocks of wild birds

donroc
03-10-2008, 09:19 PM
One Monday while typing these words
I was attacked by flocks of wild birds
"My God, I've been Hitchcocked!"

oneblindmouse
03-10-2008, 09:42 PM
One Monday while typing these words
I was attacked by flocks of wild birds
"My God, I've been Hitchcocked!
And my guns are all flintlocks!"

Kurlumbenus
03-10-2008, 09:58 PM
One Monday while typing these words
I was attacked by flocks of wild birds
"My God, I've been Hitchcocked!
And my guns are all flintlocks!"
And they pecked down my story two-thirds.


I have a friend named Bobby McGee,

rosebud1981
03-10-2008, 11:08 PM
I have a friend named Bobby McGee
Who had an affair with Nanny McPhee

oneblindmouse
03-10-2008, 11:13 PM
I have a friend named Bobby McGee
Who had an affair with Nanny McPhee
But their love didn't last

donroc
03-10-2008, 11:18 PM
I have a friend named Bobby McGee
Who had an affair with Nanny McPhee
But their love didn't last
With his staff at half mast

oneblindmouse
03-10-2008, 11:24 PM
I have a friend named Bobby McGee
Who had an affair with Nanny McPhee
But their love didn't last
With his staff at half mast
And the fact that he just couldn't pee.

Some of these verses are sh*te!