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Unique
07-13-2006, 06:44 AM
It rained as I blew out the candle
it poured as I searched for the handle
I grabbed hold of the glass

threedogpeople
07-13-2006, 11:08 AM
It rained as I blew out the candle
it poured as I searched for the handle
I grabbed hold of the glass
as I spoke to the class

PrettySpecialGal
07-14-2006, 01:03 AM
It rained as I blew out the candle
it poured as I searched for the handle
I grabbed hold of the glass
as I spoke to the class
about the political scandal

The scandal was rather complex

Kate Thornton
07-14-2006, 01:18 AM
The scandal was rather complex
Involving no drugs and no sex

Cath
07-14-2006, 02:25 AM
The scandal was rather complex
Involving no drugs and no sex
And there was not a peep

threedogpeople
07-14-2006, 02:33 AM
The scandal was rather complex
Involving no drugs and no sex
And there was not a peep
but many secrets to keep

Tricksie-ish
07-14-2006, 03:14 AM
The scandal was rather complex
Involving no drugs and no sex
And there was not a peep
but many secrets to keep
For Dubya, who some know as "Tex"
____________________________

But Bill Clinton sure has his share

PrettySpecialGal
07-14-2006, 07:05 PM
But Bill Clinton sure has his share
of silky pastel underwear

poetinahat
07-14-2006, 07:09 PM
But Bill Clinton sure has his share
of silky pastel underwear
But it isn't all his

Unique
07-14-2006, 08:41 PM
But Bill Clinton sure has his share
of silky pastel underwear
But it isn't all his
you can tell by the jiz

Melina
07-14-2006, 09:31 PM
Okay now, that's just yucky!

Unique
07-14-2006, 09:34 PM
But Bill Clinton sure has his share
of silky pastel underwear
But it isn't all his
you can tell by the jiz
and the short dark and curly brown hair.


The ball game was halted by rain

pconsidine
07-14-2006, 09:44 PM
The ball game was halted by rain
that rolled in off the coast from Espain

Melina
07-14-2006, 09:48 PM
The ball game was halted by rain
that rolled in off the coast from Espain
Derek Jeter got wet

Tricksie-ish
07-14-2006, 09:49 PM
The ball game was halted by rain
that rolled in off the coast from Espain
The balls all got wet

Melina
07-14-2006, 09:52 PM
Oops! Cross-post! How about a compromise?

Derek's balls got all wet

(what do ya think?)

Roger J Carlson
07-14-2006, 10:06 PM
The ball game was halted by rain
that rolled in off the coast from Espain
Derek's balls got all wet
All three of the set

Melina
07-14-2006, 10:26 PM
The ball game was halted by rain
that rolled in off the coast from Espain
Derek's balls got all wet
All three of the set
If I dry them, d'ya think he'd complain?

It's foggy and cold in the City

Tricksie-ish
07-14-2006, 10:45 PM
Nice work, Melina. After I posted I thought of "their" balls all got wet, but "Derek's" is even better!

Tricksie-ish
07-14-2006, 10:45 PM
It's foggy and cold in the City
Is that frost growing on my left titty?

Melina
07-14-2006, 10:51 PM
It's foggy and cold in the City
Is that frost growing on my left titty?
Is my bra made of brass?

Tricksie-ish
07-14-2006, 11:37 PM
It's foggy and cold in the City
Is that frost growing on my left titty?
Is my bra made of brass?
Gee, that's ice on my ***

davids
07-14-2006, 11:52 PM
It's foggy and cold in the city
is that frost growing on my left titty?
Is my brra made of brass?.Gee, that's ice on my a$$
So let's get down to the real knitty gritty!

One day I felt full of debauchery

Rob-rite
07-15-2006, 04:14 AM
whilst wearing my fine satin lingerie (?!)

PrettySpecialGal
07-15-2006, 08:02 PM
One day I felt full of debauchery
whilst wearing my fine satin lingerie
But the thing of it was

Solatium
07-15-2006, 08:36 PM
One day I felt full of debauchery
whilst wearing my fine satin lingerie
But the thing of it was
(Since sin is as sin does)

Unique
07-16-2006, 03:19 AM
One day I felt full of debauchery
whilst wearing my fine satin lingerie
But the thing of it was
(Since sin is as sin does)
that purple and pink causes gauchery.


Old Hiram dressed well on the set

Cath
07-16-2006, 03:31 AM
Old Hiram dressed well on the set
Of the show where he played an ex-vet

Rob-rite
07-16-2006, 04:36 AM
Old Hiram dressed well on the set
Of the show where he played an ex-vet
His lepoard-skin coat

Unique
07-16-2006, 04:42 AM
Old Hiram dressed well on the set
Of the show where he played an ex-vet
His lepoard-skin coat
from a patient of note

Rob-rite
07-16-2006, 04:58 AM
was a risk that he wore for a bet.

Their once was a cat with nine lives

threedogpeople
07-16-2006, 11:25 PM
Their once was a cat with nine lives
that gave me a case of the hives

Rob-rite
07-17-2006, 01:10 PM
Their once was a cat with nine lives
that gave me a case of the hives
so revenge I did plot

Cath
07-17-2006, 03:06 PM
Their once was a cat with nine lives
that gave me a case of the hives
so revenge I did plot
and nice it was not

poetinahat
07-17-2006, 03:46 PM
Their once was a cat with nine lives
that gave me a case of the hives
so revenge I did plot
and nice it was not
He's neutered, with seventeen wives

A generous serving of grits

Unique
07-17-2006, 03:47 PM
Their once was a cat with nine lives
that gave me a case of the hives
so revenge I did plot
and nice it was not
I set up the dude with nine wives.


When the kitty runs past shedding fur

poetinahat
07-17-2006, 03:51 PM
When the kitty runs past shedding fur
Watch out for that ol' Raymond Burr

Cath
07-17-2006, 03:56 PM
When the kitty runs past shedding fur
Watch out for that ol' Raymond Burr
Who'll pounce on poor kitty

PrettySpecialGal
07-17-2006, 04:53 PM
When the kitty runs past shedding fur
Watch out for that ol' Raymond Burr
Who'll pounce on poor kitty
But then stop short, with pity

Kate Thornton
07-17-2006, 06:59 PM
When the kitty runs past shedding fur
Watch out for that ol' Raymond Burr
Who'll pounce on poor kitty
But then stop short, with pity
No Burr in the fur equals purr!

A doggy with fleas cannot scratch

threedogpeople
07-17-2006, 07:12 PM
A doggy with fleas cannot scratch
repeatedly at a bald patch

davids
07-17-2006, 07:32 PM
A doggy with fleas cannot scratch
repeatedly at a bald patch
that sits on his bum

PattiTheWicked
07-17-2006, 07:44 PM
A doggy with fleas cannot scratch
repeatedly at a bald patch
that sits on his bum
until it goes numb

threedogpeople
07-17-2006, 07:50 PM
A doggy with fleas cannot scratch
repeatedly at a bald patch
that sits on his bum
until it goes numb
without infecting the whole batch.

Mauve monkeys create quite a stir

NeuroFizz
07-17-2006, 09:49 PM
Mauve monkeys create quite a stir
but of all the pastels in fur

davids
07-17-2006, 09:55 PM
Mauve monkeys create quite a stir
but of all the pastels in fur
one has to concur

Cath
07-17-2006, 10:57 PM
Mauve monkeys create quite a stir
but of all the pastels in fur
one has to concur
they look rather demure

davids
07-17-2006, 11:25 PM
Mauve monkeys create quite a stir
but of all the pastels in fur
one has to concur
they look rather demure
wearing ping booties while doing their duties

A pastor whose thoughts were inscrutable

Kate Thornton
07-17-2006, 11:54 PM
A pastor whose thoughts were inscruatble
But whose faith in the flesh was immutable

Cath
07-18-2006, 02:24 AM
A pastor whose thoughts were inscruatble
But whose faith in the flesh was immutable
Was caught inflagrante

Rob-rite
07-18-2006, 03:58 AM
A pastor whose thoughts were inscruatble
But whose faith in the flesh was immutable
Was caught inflagrante
With ex-popstar Adam ant

PrettySpecialGal
07-18-2006, 05:40 PM
A pastor whose thoughts were inscrutable
But whose faith in the flesh was immutable
Was caught inflagrante
With ex-popstar Adam ant
Whose love he found quite indisputable

Now on the subject of pop stars,

poetinahat
07-18-2006, 05:59 PM
Now on the subject of pop stars,
Madonna and Pink live in box cars

Cath
07-18-2006, 08:29 PM
Now on the subject of pop stars,
Madonna and Pink live in box cars
and as for our Britney,

davids
07-18-2006, 08:57 PM
Now on the subject of pop stars
Madonna and Pink live in box cars
and as for our Britney
she's writing a litany

Unique
07-18-2006, 09:07 PM
Now on the subject of pop stars
Madonna and Pink live in box cars
and as for our Britney
she's writing a litany
And here's her paid ticket for Mars.

We'll all send her off with a bang

davids
07-18-2006, 09:11 PM
We'll all send her off with a bang
'cause her friends all eat bangers and mash

PrettySpecialGal
07-23-2006, 05:56 PM
okay, Davids- I had to fix it so we can go on.
Check http://www.poetstrain.com/poetrybook/limerick-poetry.html
for rules
Thanks for trying!

We'll all send her off with a bang
She'll be dressed the same as her gang

Cath
07-23-2006, 06:06 PM
We'll all send her off with a bang
She'll be dressed the same as her gang
In high heels and stockings

poetinahat
07-24-2006, 04:22 AM
We'll all send her off with a bang
She'll be dressed the same as her gang
In high heels and stockings
her boots won't be knocking

PrettySpecialGal
07-24-2006, 05:41 AM
We'll all send her off with a bang
She'll be dressed the same as her gang
In high heels and stockings
her boots won't be knocking
how disappointed we all are-- oh, dang!

There once was a man from Australia,

Pat~
07-24-2006, 05:43 AM
There once was a man from Australia,
Who planted a hot pink azalea;

Cath
07-24-2006, 05:45 AM
There once was a man from Australia,
Who planted a hot pink azalea;
Which started to shrink

Rob-rite
07-25-2006, 06:42 AM
There once was a man from Australia,
Who planted a hot pink azalea;
Which started to shrink
For want of a drink

threedogpeople
07-25-2006, 08:13 AM
There once was a man from Australia,
Who planted a hot pink azalea;
Which started to shrink
For want of a drink...
consumed in full-dress regalia.

It's hotter than hot peppers here,

poetinahat
07-25-2006, 08:24 AM
It's hotter than hot peppers here,
so sweaty, my t-shirt looks clear!

Unique
07-25-2006, 03:17 PM
It's hotter than hot peppers here,
so sweaty, my t-shirt looks clear!
My boobs are afloat

Cath
07-25-2006, 03:34 PM
It's hotter than hot peppers here,
so sweaty, my t-shirt looks clear!
My boobs are afloat
Folks are starting to note

Cath
07-25-2006, 04:09 PM
KTC is forgetful - a bit
Coz he didn't start a new limerick

PattiTheWicked
07-25-2006, 04:38 PM
The ice in this place is so chilly,
and I realize this sounds a bit silly

PrettySpecialGal
07-25-2006, 06:09 PM
The ice in this place is so chilly,
and I realize this sounds a bit silly
but as cold as I am,

Unique
07-26-2006, 01:34 AM
The ice in this place is so chilly,
and I realize this sounds a bit silly
but as cold as I am,
I'm craving fried Spam

threedogpeople
07-26-2006, 01:59 AM
The ice in this place is so chilly,
and I realize this sounds a bit silly
but as cold as I am,
I'm craving fried Spam
served by an ex-pres called Willy,

Hot doggies can smell up your house

Unique
07-26-2006, 03:51 PM
Hot doggies can smell up your house
when they piss on your favorite blouse

Robert Toy
07-26-2006, 04:24 PM
Hot doggies can smell up your house
when they piss on your favorite blouse
And kitty is obsessed

Unique
07-26-2006, 04:29 PM
Hot doggies can smell up your house
when they piss on your favorite blouse
And kitty is obsessed
with wearing my dress

Unique
07-27-2006, 02:51 AM
Hot doggies can smell up your house
when they piss on your favorite blouse
And kitty is obsessed
with wearing my dress
and leaving it spattered with mouse.


I'm only along for the ride

Cath
07-27-2006, 03:03 AM
I'm only along for the ride
Said the girl who was sitting inside

PrettySpecialGal
07-27-2006, 01:37 PM
I'm only along for the ride
Said the girl who was sitting inside
She was sitting in back

P.H.Delarran
07-27-2006, 01:40 PM
I'm only along for the ride
Said the girl who was sitting inside
She was sitting in back
Clinging tight to a sack

PrettySpecialGal
07-27-2006, 01:51 PM
I'm only along for the ride
Said the girl who was sitting inside
She was sitting in back
Clinging tight to a sack
She paid me to go take her to hide

The sack contained a mystery

Unique
07-27-2006, 10:40 PM
The sack contained a mystery
a portal in time through history

Cath
07-27-2006, 10:45 PM
The sack contained a mystery
a portal in time through history
It went to the past,

PrettySpecialGal
07-28-2006, 12:47 AM
The sack contained a mystery
a portal in time through history
It went to the past,
when she once had a blast

Pat~
07-28-2006, 02:42 AM
The sack contained a mystery
a portal in time through history
It went to the past,
when she once had a blast
scaling cliffs, though the climb made her blistery.

There once was a young lad named Harry

poetinahat
07-28-2006, 05:44 AM
There once was a young lad named Harry
whose uncle said, "Boy, never marry!"

PrettySpecialGal
07-28-2006, 06:26 AM
There once was a young lad named Harry
whose uncle said, "Boy, never marry!"
But to his utmost dismay

Pat~
07-28-2006, 06:27 AM
There once was a young lad named Harry
whose uncle said, "Boy, never marry!"
But to his utmost dismay
He'd married that day,

Unique
07-28-2006, 03:21 PM
There once was a young lad named Harry
whose uncle said, "Boy, never marry!"
But to his utmost dismay
He'd married that day,
his cousin, a sweet girl named Mary.


When stalking a little red hen

Cath
07-28-2006, 03:29 PM
When stalking a little red hen,
A bonnie wee laddie called Ben

Unique
07-28-2006, 11:17 PM
When stalking a little red hen,
A bonnie wee laddie called Ben
came up with an egg

Kate Thornton
07-29-2006, 12:01 AM
When stalking a little red hen,
A bonnie wee laddie called Ben
came up with an egg
Half the size of his leg

NeuroFizz
07-29-2006, 01:05 AM
When stalking a little red hen,
A bonnie wee laddie called Ben
came up with an egg
Half the size of his leg
and whipped up an omelette for ten

The echo poked through my sleep

Pat~
07-29-2006, 05:51 AM
The echo poked through my sleep--
That annoying, repeating beep-beep;

Cath
07-29-2006, 06:18 AM
The echo poked through my sleep--
That annoying, repeating beep-beep;
I wished it would go

threedogpeople
07-29-2006, 11:34 PM
The echo poked through my sleep--
That annoying, repeating beep-beep;
I wished it would go,
I'd have paid it some dough,

Cath
07-29-2006, 11:38 PM
The echo poked through my sleep--
That annoying, repeating beep-beep;
I wished it would go,
I'd have paid it some dough,
To sink into the ocean so deep.


One day while afloat on the sea,

threedogpeople
07-29-2006, 11:40 PM
One day while afloat on the sea
a giant bird landed on me,

Unique
07-30-2006, 04:43 PM
One day while afloat on the sea
a giant bird landed on me,
He sat down for a nap

Cath
07-30-2006, 08:12 PM
One day while afloat on the sea
a giant bird landed on me,
He sat down for a nap
Right there on my lap

clockwork
07-31-2006, 05:10 AM
One day while afloat on the sea
a giant bird landed on me,
He sat down for a nap
Right there on my lap
And whispered, "We'll see what we see."


As I ascended to heaven today,

Unique
07-31-2006, 03:16 PM
As I ascended to heaven today
aloft to my home far away

spacejock2
07-31-2006, 05:57 PM
As I ascended to heaven today
aloft to my home far away
I looked down on the sinners

threedogpeople
07-31-2006, 09:39 PM
As I ascended to heaven today
aloft to my home far away
I looked down on the sinners,
the drunkards and winners,

PrettySpecialGal
08-02-2006, 01:00 AM
As I ascended to heaven today
aloft to my home far away
I looked down on the sinners,
the drunkards and winners,
And then said to them "Up, up and away"

School will be starting real soon,

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 01:03 AM
School will be starting real soon,
and at prices, my wallet will swoon.

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:04 AM
School will be starting real soon,
and at prices, my wallet will swoon.
Three hundred dollars or more

Unique
08-02-2006, 03:05 AM
School will be starting real soon,
and at prices, my wallet will swoon.
Three hundred dollars or more
We spent at the store

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:19 AM
School will be starting real soon,
and at prices, my wallet will swoon.
Three hundred dollars or more
We spent at the store
between ten o'clock and noon!

A great horned owl lives in my tree

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 03:24 AM
A great horned owl lives in my tree.
I was underneath it when it started to pee.

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:28 AM
A great horned owl lives in my tree.
I was underneath it when it started to pee
ThreeDog loaned you a tissue

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 03:33 AM
A great horned owl lives in my tree.
I was underneath it when it started to pee.
ThreeDog loaned you a tissue,
And said "This ain't no issue"

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:39 AM
A great horned owl lives in my tree.
I was underneath it when it started to pee.
ThreeDog loaned you a tissue,
And said "This ain't no issue.
The wildlife and tissue are free."

Midnight can be quite a bother,

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 03:45 AM
Midnight can be quite a bother,
It's so dark, I can't find my father.

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:50 AM
Midnight can be quite a bother,
It's so dark, I can't find my father.
So I follow the snoring,

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 03:54 AM
Midnight can be quite a bother,
It's so dark, I can't find my father.
So I follow the snorring
Heard over the pooring,

Cath
08-02-2006, 03:58 AM
Midnight can be quite a bother,
It's so dark, I can't find my father.
So I follow the snorring
Heard over the pouring,
Of the whisky he hides from my mother.

The taste of good Scotch is real fine

threedogpeople
08-02-2006, 03:59 AM
Midnight can be quite a bother,
It's so dark, I can't find my father.
So I follow the snorring
Heard over the pouring
by the drunk group of wanna' be authors.

Pink piggies can cause a commotion,

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 04:03 AM
Pink piggies can cause a commotion,
but good Scotch is such a fine potion.

Cath
08-02-2006, 04:07 AM
Pink piggies can cause a commotion,
but good Scotch is such a fine potion
When drunk by the jug

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 04:19 AM
Pink piggies can cause a commotion,
but good Scotch is such a fine potion.
When drug by the jug,
don't swallow the bug!

Unique
08-02-2006, 04:47 AM
Pink piggies can cause a commotion,
but good Scotch is such a fine potion.
When drunk by the jug,
don't swallow the bug!
Or you'll be needing calomine lotion.

Good scotch I really do crave

Cath
08-02-2006, 05:16 AM
Good scotch I really do crave
When riding the crest of a wave

PrettySpecialGal
08-02-2006, 04:00 PM
Good scotch I really do crave
When riding the crest of a wave
But if my board fails me,

poetinahat
08-02-2006, 04:06 PM
Good scotch I really do crave
When riding the crest of a wave
But if my board fails me,
and Customs Man jails me

NeuroFizz
08-02-2006, 04:28 PM
Good scotch I really do crave
When riding the crest of a wave
But if my board fails me,
and Customs Man jails me
I guess I'll end up Bubba's slave



The popsicle gives me brain freeze

Unique
08-02-2006, 04:30 PM
The popsicle gives me brain freeze
the taste leaves me weak in the knees

Cath
08-02-2006, 04:31 PM
The popsicle gives me brain freeze
the taste leaves me weak in the knees
They're really delicious

poetinahat
08-02-2006, 04:35 PM
The popsicle gives me brain freeze
the taste leaves me weak in the knees
They're really delicious
In fact, I'm suspicious

PrettySpecialGal
08-02-2006, 04:51 PM
The popsicle gives me brain freeze
the taste leaves me weak in the knees
They're really delicious
In fact, I'm suspicious
What's the flavor? OH! Carrots and peas!

There once was a girl from Texas

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 06:50 PM
There once was a girl from Texas
Who's power was simply to vex us.

Pat~
08-02-2006, 07:53 PM
There once was a girl from Texas
Who's power was simply to vex us.
She sprinkled her posts

Cath
08-02-2006, 07:54 PM
There once was a girl from Texas
Who's power was simply to vex us.
She sprinkled her posts
With literary toasts

NeuroFizz
08-02-2006, 11:12 PM
There once was a girl from Texas
Who's power was simply to vex us.
She sprinkled her posts
With literary toasts
'n prose more tangled than a nexus


The sight turned my stomach to mush

MidnightMuse
08-02-2006, 11:32 PM
The sight turned my stomach to mush
I mean really, the tail on that tush!

Unique
08-03-2006, 02:43 AM
The sight turned my stomach to mush
I mean really, the tail on that tush!
it hung low in the middle

MidnightMuse
08-03-2006, 03:42 AM
The sight turned my stomach to mush
I mean really, the tail on that tush!
it hung low in the middle,
even once played the fiddle!

Pat~
08-03-2006, 03:47 AM
The sight turned my stomach to mush
I mean really, the tail on that tush!
it hung low in the middle,
even once played the fiddle
in a tribute to George W. Bush.

A hog on a log in a bog

MidnightMuse
08-03-2006, 03:58 AM
A hot on a log in a bog
In the fog looked just like a frog.

dclary
08-03-2006, 04:18 AM
A hog on a log in a bog
In the fog looked just like a frog.
he so loved the wood that he straddled
when the owl came he didn't skedaddle

PrettySpecialGal
08-03-2006, 04:47 AM
A hog on a log in a bog
In the fog looked just like a frog.
he so loved the wood that he straddled
when the owl came he didn't skedaddle
then the hog jumped, ate the owl-- what a.....er......hog!

I have a favorite dish,

Stew21
08-03-2006, 05:09 AM
i have a favorite dish
it's painted with a fish

MidnightMuse
08-03-2006, 08:16 PM
I have a favorite dish
it's painted with a fish.
My kid tried to chip it,

Cath
08-03-2006, 09:27 PM
I have a favorite dish
it's painted with a fish.
My kid tried to chip it,
To smash it, to flip it,

Melina
08-03-2006, 10:04 PM
I have a favorite dish
it's painted with a fish.
My kid tried to chip it,
To smash it, to flip it,
And now it won't hold my knish!


I had to move out of my condo

NeuroFizz
08-03-2006, 10:37 PM
I had to move out of my condo
because of my squeeze, named Rondo

MidnightMuse
08-03-2006, 10:48 PM
I had to move out of my condo
because of my squeeze, named Rondo
He'd driven right through it,

NeuroFizz
08-03-2006, 11:22 PM
I had to move out of my condo
because of my squeeze, named Rondo
He'd driven right through it,
and I couldn't glue it

MidnightMuse
08-03-2006, 11:25 PM
I had to move out of my condo
because of my squeeze, named Rondo
He'd driven right thorugh it,
and I couldn't glue it
Not even with extra-strength Bond-O.

I wish I had a pickle

clockwork
08-04-2006, 12:03 AM
I wish I had a pickle
They're what, like a nickel?

MidnightMuse
08-04-2006, 01:04 AM
I wish I had a pickle
They're what, like a nickel?
I'd slice it up small,

Unique
08-04-2006, 02:58 AM
I wish I had a pickle
They're what, like a nickel?
I'd slice it up small,
green bumps and all

Pat~
08-04-2006, 03:19 AM
I wish I had a pickle
They're what, like a nickel?
I'd slice it up small,
green bumps and all
and then it would my palate tickle.

A pea in a pod in a pail

PrettySpecialGal
08-04-2006, 03:46 AM
A pea in a pod in a pail
held by golden-haired little girl Gail

clockwork
08-04-2006, 05:48 AM
A pea in a pod in a pail
held by golden-haired little girl Gail
Alliteration she prized

Cath
08-04-2006, 05:55 AM
A pea in a pod in a pail
held by golden-haired little girl Gail
Alliteration she prized
Correct grammar, despised

Pat~
08-04-2006, 06:07 AM
A pea in a pod in a pail
held by golden-haired little girl Gail
Alliteration she prized
Correct grammar, despised
And poetry made our Gail wail.

Young Malcolm was late for his date

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:09 AM
Young Malcolm was late for his date
Too bad, the souflee can't wait

Cath
08-04-2006, 06:17 AM
Young Malcolm was late for his date
Too bad, the souflee can't wait
It softened and sunk

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:22 AM
Young Malcolm was late for his date
Too bad, the souflee can't wait
It softened and sunk
He swore he'd been punk'd

Pat~
08-04-2006, 06:33 AM
Young Malcolm was late for his date
Too bad, the souflee can't wait
It softened and sunk
He swore he'd been punk'd
As he watched it deflate on his plate.

I ran to my mailbox today

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:37 AM
I ran to my mailbox today
To get the shoes I bought on ebay

Cath
08-04-2006, 04:04 PM
I ran to my mailbox today
To get the shoes I bought on ebay
I was hoping they'd fit

clockwork
08-04-2006, 04:15 PM
I ran to my mailbox today
To get the shoes I bought on ebay
I was hoping they'd fit
But they pinched quite a bit

pconsidine
08-04-2006, 05:36 PM
I ran to my mailbox today
To get the shoes I bought on ebay
I was hoping they'd fit
But they pinched quite a bit,
yet I can't quite give them away.

(They're Manolos!)


If ever you find yourself stuck

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:01 PM
If ever you find yourself stuck
Hurting, or down on your luck

MidnightMuse
08-04-2006, 06:12 PM
If ever you find yourself stuck
Hurting, or down on your luck.
Just dust off those buns,

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:32 PM
If ever you find yourself stuck
Hurting, or down on your luck.
Just dust off those buns,
Stick to your guns,

NeuroFizz
08-04-2006, 06:41 PM
If ever you find yourself stuck
Hurting, or down on your luck.
Just dust off those buns,
Stick to your guns,
and grab your self-pity to chuck


I feel like a coin on its edge

clockwork
08-04-2006, 06:48 PM
I feel like a coin on its edge
Without a head or a tail to hedge

MidnightMuse
08-04-2006, 06:50 PM
I feel like a coin on its edge
Without a head or a tail to hedge.
It's like somebody flipped me,

Melina
08-04-2006, 08:29 PM
I feel like a coin on its edge
Without a head or a tail to hedge.
It's like somebody flipped me,
As if life somehow gypped me

Unique
08-04-2006, 08:30 PM
I feel like a coin on its edge
Without a head or a tail to hedge.
It's like somebody flipped me,
As if life somehow gypped me
but I ain't gonna jump off this ledge.

My scooter, she stops on a dime

Cath
08-04-2006, 08:31 PM
My scooter, she stops on a dime
And her engine is simply sublime

clockwork
08-04-2006, 08:34 PM
My scooter, she stops on a dime
And her engine is simply sublime
It's blue like the sea

PattiTheWicked
08-04-2006, 08:35 PM
My scooter, she stops on a dime
And her engine is simply sublime
It's blue like the sea
Just perfect, like me!

clockwork
08-04-2006, 08:41 PM
My scooter, she stops on a dime
And her engine is simply sublime
It's blue like the sea
Just perfect, like me!
But she craps out on hills every time.

In the summertime Johnny picks pears,

Melina
08-04-2006, 08:43 PM
Hey, Chris--

Your ups! Give us a first line for the next one, please...:D

clockwork
08-04-2006, 08:48 PM
Sorry, I put it in after finishing off the last one in an edit. You must have been lightning-quick!

In the summertime Johnny picks pears...

Melina
08-04-2006, 09:04 PM
My scooter, she stops on a dime
And her engine is simply sublime
It's blue like the sea
Just perfect, like me!
But she craps out on hills every time.

In the summertime Johnny picks pears,
Which is tough in the knickers he wears

clockwork
08-04-2006, 09:10 PM
In the summertime Johnny picks pears,
Which is tough in the knickers he wears
It's not a great job

Unique
08-04-2006, 09:25 PM
In the summertime Johnny picks pears,
Which is tough in the knickers he wears
It's not a great job
for a buck and a bob

clockwork
08-04-2006, 09:26 PM
In the summertime Johnny picks pears,
Which is tough in the knickers he wears
It's not a great job
for a buck and a bob
Still, Johnny can pick pears like a sonofabitch.

clockwork
08-04-2006, 09:28 PM
Just kidding. :rolleyes:

In the summertime Johnny picks pears,
Which is tough in the knickers he wears
It's not a great job
for a buck and a bob
But to Johnny there's naught that compares.

I've maxed out my Visa again...

NeuroFizz
08-04-2006, 10:03 PM
I've maxed out my Visa again
for that pool table down in the den

MidnightMuse
08-04-2006, 10:59 PM
I've maxed out my Visa again
for that pool table down in the den.
Who knew I'd be loosin',

clockwork
08-04-2006, 11:05 PM
I've maxed out my Visa again
for that pool table down in the den.
Who knew I'd be loosin',
The wife gave me a bruisin'

NeuroFizz
08-04-2006, 11:21 PM
I've maxed out my Visa again
for that pool table down in the den.
Who knew I'd be loosin',
The wife gave me a bruisin'
and that eight ball has lost all its zen


The clouds just flew 'cross the sky

MidnightMuse
08-04-2006, 11:35 PM
The clouds just flew 'cross the sky
I looked up, fell back and heaved a great sigh.

clockwork
08-04-2006, 11:53 PM
The clouds just flew 'cross the sky
I looked up, fell back and heaved a great sigh.
As the sunshine bloomed,

PrettySpecialGal
08-05-2006, 08:50 AM
The clouds just flew 'cross the sky
I looked up, fell back and heaved a great sigh.
As the sunshine bloomed,
The sky it consumed,

clockwork
08-05-2006, 03:30 PM
The clouds just flew 'cross the sky
I looked up, fell back and heaved a great sigh.
As the sunshine bloomed,
The sky it consumed,
'twas really a nuke, exploding sky-high.

I'm sure I saw Tom Hanks today...

Unique
08-05-2006, 03:36 PM
I'm sure I saw Tom Hanks today...
while sailing out on the back bay

clockwork
08-05-2006, 03:39 PM
I'm sure I saw Tom Hanks today
while sailing out on the back bay
Was he shooting a flick?

Unique
08-05-2006, 03:52 PM
I'm sure I saw Tom Hanks today
while sailing out on the back bay
Was he shooting a flick?
He was holding a ... stick

clockwork
08-05-2006, 03:58 PM
I'm sure I saw Tom Hanks today
while sailing out on the back bay
Was he shooting a flick?
He was holding a ... stick
Man, he's whacked - I hope he's OK.

At Starbucks, the queue was so long

Unique
08-06-2006, 02:19 AM
At Starbucks, the queue was so long
I've just heard the 35th song

clockwork
08-06-2006, 04:04 AM
At Starbucks, the queue was so long
I've just heard the 35th song
All I wanted was tea

Cath
08-06-2006, 04:13 AM
At Starbucks, the queue was so long
I've just heard the 35th song
All I wanted was tea
And a bag of coffee

clockwork
08-06-2006, 04:41 AM
At Starbucks, the queue was so long
I've just heard the 35th song
All I wanted was tea
And a bag of coffee
But the jerks got my order all wrong.

Limerick challenge - advanced level

Let's try one (just one ;) ) made up of lyrics from pre-existing songs - anything you like as long as it rhymes, roughly fits the limerick pattern/beat we've got going and makes a little story. Very tricky, I know, but here goes...

It's been a hard day's night

PattiTheWicked
08-06-2006, 05:37 AM
It's been a hard day's night
What they want is love at first sight


(XTC, folks!)

clockwork
08-06-2006, 05:44 AM
It's been a hard day's night
What they want is love at first sight
It's the freakiest show

(Bowie, folks!)

Meaney
08-06-2006, 08:45 AM
It's been a hard day's night
What they want is love at first sight
It's the freakiest show
Baby, this I know

(Marvin Gaye, folks!)

clockwork
08-06-2006, 04:22 PM
It's been a hard day's night
What they want is love at first sight
It's the freakiest show
Baby, this I know
I love you whether it's wrong or right.

(Beddingfield, folks!)

Wow... that's some artsy lyrics y'all. Nice job! Another?


I should stay away but what can I do?


(Holiday, amongst others, folks!)

Tricksie-ish
08-06-2006, 05:15 PM
I should stay away but what can I do?
She said, "If you come back I'll sue!"

Roger J Carlson
08-06-2006, 05:53 PM
I should stay away but what can I do?
She said, "If you come back I'll sue!"
So I started this poem,

clockwork
08-06-2006, 07:24 PM
(OK, so we're abandoning the real-world lyric idea... I can dig.)

I should stay away but what can I do?
She said, "If you come back I'll sue!"
So I started this poem,
Hopin' she's knowin'

Unique
08-06-2006, 10:03 PM
I should stay away but what can I do?
She said, "If you come back I'll sue!"
So I started this poem,
Hopin' she's knowin'
I'm not really a boy named Sue.


When Mikey and Jenny go out

clockwork
08-06-2006, 10:17 PM
When Mikey and Jenny go out
(As friends, of course) Mikey's a lout,

threedogpeople
08-06-2006, 10:36 PM
When Mikey and Jenny go out
(As friends, of course) Mikey's a lout,
With his button down fly

Tricksie-ish
08-06-2006, 10:38 PM
When Mikey and Jenny go out
(As friends, of course) Mikey's a lout,
With his button down fly
He's not very shy

threedogpeople
08-06-2006, 11:42 PM
When Mikey and Jenny go out
(As friends, of course) Mikey's a lout,
With his button down fly
He's not very shy
of using his credit card clout.

I had a very odd nightmare last night

clockwork
08-07-2006, 12:24 AM
I had a very odd nightmare last night
It began with fall from great height

Tricksie-ish
08-07-2006, 05:25 AM
I had a very odd nightmare last night
It began with fall from great height
I was totally nude

MidnightMuse
08-07-2006, 05:26 AM
I had a very odd nightmare last night
It began with fall from great height
I was totally nude
And such a big prude

Cath
08-07-2006, 05:30 AM
I had a very odd nightmare last night
It began with fall from great height
I was totally nude
And such a big prude
I gave my old neighbour a fright.



A preacher, a nun and a monk

Tricksie-ish
08-07-2006, 05:39 AM
A preacher, a nun and a monk
Locked a priest inside their car trunk

clockwork
08-07-2006, 05:44 AM
A preacher, a nun and a monk
Locked a priest inside their car trunk
Blaspheming, the crime

Unique
08-07-2006, 03:07 PM
A preacher, a nun and a monk
Locked a priest inside their car trunk
Blaspheming, the crime
they swore he'd do time

MidnightMuse
08-07-2006, 06:35 PM
A preacher, a nun and a monk
Locked a priest inside their car trunk
Blaspheming the crime
they swore he'd do time
But all they heard was a very loud thunk.

It's National Flugelhorn Day,

clockwork
08-07-2006, 06:38 PM
It's National Flugelhorn Day,
When Flugelhornists gather to play

Unique
08-07-2006, 06:40 PM
It's National Flugelhorn Day,
When Flugelhornists gather to play
They heave and they blow

PattiTheWicked
08-07-2006, 06:44 PM
It's National Flugelhorn Day,
When Flugelhornists gather to play
They heave and they blow
And flop to and fro

NeuroFizz
08-07-2006, 07:40 PM
It's National Flugelhorn Day,
When Flugelhornists gather to play
They heave and they blow
And flop to and fro
and all in a minor key of A


No sax before a big game (nope, no typos here)

MidnightMuse
08-07-2006, 07:41 PM
No sax before a big game
Really, it's quite a big shame

clockwork
08-07-2006, 07:59 PM
No sax before a big game
Really, it's quite a big shame
Don't suck, don't blow

PattiTheWicked
08-07-2006, 08:52 PM
No sax before a big game
Really, it's quite a big shame
Don't suck, don't blow
Who knows what might grow?

clockwork
08-07-2006, 09:41 PM
No sax before a big game
Really, it's quite a big shame
Don't suck, don't blow
Who knows what might grow?
Hey, who says double entendres are lame?

Operator, please get me New York

Unique
08-07-2006, 10:52 PM
Operator, please get me New York
I can't seem to dial with this fork

clockwork
08-07-2006, 10:53 PM
Operator, please get me New York
I can't seem to dial with this fork
There's no answer at all

MidnightMuse
08-07-2006, 11:19 PM
Operator, please get me New York
I can't seem to dial with this fork
There's no answer at all
I've been waiting since Fall!

clockwork
08-07-2006, 11:21 PM
Operator, please get me New York
I can't seem to dial with this fork
There's no answer at all
I've been waiting since Fall!
Ah, hell, it's quicker to walk.

(Will let someone else start the next one...)

NeuroFizz
08-07-2006, 11:23 PM
Operator, please get me New York
I can't seem to dial with this fork
There's no answer at all
I've been waiting since Fall!
and that editor is being a dork


I just fell for a publishing scam

clockwork
08-07-2006, 11:26 PM
Dude! That was cold-blooded... :tongue


I just fell for a publishing scam
I paid ninety bucks and then BLAM!

MidnightMuse
08-07-2006, 11:29 PM
I just fell for a publishing scam
I paid ninety bucks and then BLAM!
They promised the moon,

clockwork
08-07-2006, 11:32 PM
I just fell for a publishing scam
I paid ninety bucks and then BLAM!
They promised the moon,
What a buffoon!

MidnightMuse
08-08-2006, 12:41 AM
I just fell for a publishing scam
I paid ninety bucks adn then BLAM!
They promised the moon,
What a buffon!
Now who'll buy my book about spam?

I have me a strange little itch.

Cath
08-08-2006, 12:49 AM
I have me a strange little itch.
I can't scratch it; it's really a b*tch

NeuroFizz
08-08-2006, 01:06 AM
I have me a strange little itch.
I can't scratch it; it's really a b*tch
a coathanger unwound

MidnightMuse
08-08-2006, 01:09 AM
I have me a strange little itch.
I can't scratch it; it's really a b*tch
a coathanger unwound,
can a door jam be found?

clockwork
08-08-2006, 01:10 AM
I have me a strange little itch.
I can't scratch it; it's really a b*tch
a coathanger unwound,
can a door jam be found?
Or is this a curse by a witch?

Is it true nothing rhymes with orange... ;)

Cath
08-08-2006, 01:50 AM
:tongue

Is it true nothing rhymes with orange
There are no words like lorange or borindge?

clockwork
08-08-2006, 02:01 AM
Is it true nothing rhymes with orange
There are no words like lorange or borindge?
And what about purple?

MidnightMuse
08-08-2006, 02:13 AM
Is it true nothing rhymes with orange
There are no words like lorange or borindge?
And what about purple?
Like flurple, and nurple,

Cath
08-08-2006, 02:31 AM
Is it true nothing rhymes with orange
There are no words like lorange or borindge?
And what about purple?
Like flurple, and nurple,
All that's left is unrhymable orange.


Once Henry had finished his drink,

clockwork
08-08-2006, 02:40 AM
(The previous limerick could be in a Doctor Suess book) :)

Once Henry had finished his drink,
And came to the drunkenness brink,

Rob-rite
08-08-2006, 06:08 AM
Once Henry had finished his drink,
And came to the drunkenness brink,
He fell off his chair,

Meaney
08-08-2006, 01:44 PM
Once Henry had finished his drink,
And came to the drunkenness brink,
He fell off his chair,
then leapt in the air

DeborahM
08-08-2006, 01:52 PM
He fell off his chair,
then leapt in the air
and gave us all a wink

NeuroFizz
08-08-2006, 04:35 PM
The best way to kill limerick thread
(this is a first line, people)