How do you....

I'm bored, so...........

Let's start a "How do you..." thread.

1st example-

How do you....
...deal with creepy people (Not the stalker ones, the "Hey baby, how you doin'?" ones with missing teeth)

My response- "I've killed far better men than you..."

Now it's your turn. Feel free to change the example if you want.

1. knock myself out

2. have someone else knock me out

3. take knock out pills

You become a lumberjack.

How do you quit a job?

Beat the nearest sibling with a pillow until either pillow or sibling is nice and puffy.

How do you kill a badger with coffee?

1. Get my always-drunk neighbor, Bobby, to breathe on a match

2. Call my other neighbors over, the middle school kids, and hand them 5 dollars after telling them to "just go crazy" (FYI- this will cause the best fire you've ever seen)

How do you shop for strawberries?

I make myself pay the rent. If I don't I'm kicking myself out.

How do make a sock?

Take advantage of the manager, then add extra bacon to the Whopper.

How do you pluck back hair?