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Puma
07-04-2006, 04:56 AM
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-14-2006, 11:18 PM Warren (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=7690) vbmenu_register("postmenu_647497", true);
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Threw a look, gave a look?
Not certain this question belongs here as it's more of a lexicon question, but I'll post it anyway.

I'm looking for both British and American English verbs to fit into this sentence:

Matiie <verbed> her a menacing look.

Yes, I know I can write it as "...sneered/leered/glared at her." In this case, I want to write it out as "...gave her a menacing look."

I've thought of "dropped" and "offered," but these are too benign for the sentence. "Gave" seems appropriate as a most common usage but it's still weak. "Threw" is stronger, but I'm not happy with it for some reason.

Any ideas? No, this isn't writers' block. It's a senior moment! ;)

The characters and the narrative happen to be British, so any local jargon from the isles would be fine. For American English, something more mainstream would be needed so it would work in British English too.

Thanks,

Warren
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 12:52 AM maestrowork (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=2) vbmenu_register("postmenu_647598", true);
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How about:

Matiie shot her a menacing look.
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How about "barfed?" Oh, wait, this isn't Mad Libs...

I was going to suggest what Maestro said. Which in itself indicates it is a cliche, since it's the first thing that popped into both our heads.

This post had no point! Hooray!
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 03:29 AM Rod Munch (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=7989) vbmenu_register("postmenu_647692", true);
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I'd suggest a completely different sentence. A character giving (or throwing) someone a menacing look is a bit of a cliche. Is there any way you can work it so your character does something else and still gets her menace across?
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Threw, shot, gave all work. I wouldn't worry about the cliche - most people speak in cliches. Puma
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 07:07 AM Jamesaritchie (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=184) vbmenu_register("postmenu_647820", true);
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puma
Threw, shot, gave all work. I wouldn't worry about the cliche - most people speak in cliches. Puma


Yeah, but those who write in cliches speak in terms of how many rejections they receive.

As an editor, cliches mean I stop reading right on the spot and reach for the nearest rejection slip.
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 08:07 AM maestrowork (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=2) vbmenu_register("postmenu_647860", true);
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Wow, you're tough, James. You would really reject someone like that? The fact is, I have found cliches in almost every published work I've read, including literary work by famous authors.
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 12:05 PM reph (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=12) vbmenu_register("postmenu_648256", true);
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maestrowork
I have found cliches in almost every published work I've read, including literary work by famous authors.

Hamlet...
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Can a look really be thrown? If so, do you have to wind up and pitch it like a fast ball, or does the underhanded softball approach work better?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Silver King
Can a look really be thrown? If so, do you have to wind up and pitch it like a fast ball, or does the underhanded softball approach work better?


:ROFL:

I was going to say "tossed" but I have to agree with everyone above. Unless your character has away to use there hand when looking it should not be tossed, thrown, shot, barfed, given, sling shot, expelled, etc.

I know you don't want to, but I would trust Mr. Ritchie if he says it's cliche...

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Cliches
So, James, how do you write realistic dialogue if you don't use cliches? For that matter, how do you write almost anything and convey what you want to say? Going back to Warren's original question, how would you write the sentence to get across the meaning? Puma
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http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/statusicon/post_old.gif 06-15-2006, 07:56 PM pdr (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/member.php?u=185) vbmenu_register("postmenu_649337", true);
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Um...
Reph, he made the cliches first!


Matiie <verbed> her a menacing look.

Possibly?

Mattie directed a menacing look at her.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puma
Threw, shot, gave all work. I wouldn't worry about the cliche - most people speak in cliches. Puma


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