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Flanderso
11-29-2018, 04:43 PM
Hello all

I am looking for beta(s) to read my low-fantasy story “Down the Greysmoke”, currently at 100k words.


Since the disappearance of her husband, Velgreesha has struggled to keep her orchard of rare fruits alive. Customer numbers are dwindling as are her hopes for the future. So when a mysterious beast starts terrorising her village, she knows it will be bad for business.

Frustrated by the village elders’ inaction, in particularly its newest, and increasingly scheming, member, Velgreesha comes to realise the only way to deal with the menace is to roll up one’s sleeves and grab something sharp.

If killing a ravenous beast wasn’t hard enough, Velgreesha finds herself up against further obstacles: an ageing chieftain desperate for glory, a murderous ghoul that prowls the night, and all the fingers that point her way when answering the vital question: who summoned the creature in the first place?


I’ve been polishing this story for years now and I just need new eyes on it. I plan to start querying agents soon so any help I can get to make it any better would be most appreciated. I especially require feedback on plot, pace and motivations. Of course, if you find anything glaringly awful or confusing, please let me know that too.

If you’re interested, please PM me

Many thanks in advance

Phil

AudreyInDC
12-17-2018, 08:27 PM
Hello all

I am looking for beta(s) to read my low-fantasy story “Down the Greysmoke”, currently at 100k words.


Since the disappearance of her husband, Velgreesha has struggled to keep her orchard of rare fruits alive. Customer numbers are dwindling as are her hopes for the future. So when a mysterious beast starts terrorising her village, she knows it will be bad for business.

Frustrated by the village elders’ inaction, in particularly its newest, and increasingly scheming, member, Velgreesha comes to realise the only way to deal with the menace is to roll up one’s sleeves and grab something sharp.

If killing a ravenous beast wasn’t hard enough, Velgreesha finds herself up against further obstacles: an ageing chieftain desperate for glory, a murderous ghoul that prowls the night, and all the fingers that point her way when answering the vital question: who summoned the creature in the first place?


I’ve been polishing this story for years now and I just need new eyes on it. I plan to start querying agents soon so any help I can get to make it any better would be most appreciated. I especially require feedback on plot, pace and motivations. Of course, if you find anything glaringly awful or confusing, please let me know that too.

If you’re interested, please PM me

Many thanks in advance

Phil

Hello! Are you still looking for a beta reader, and would you be willing to swap critiques? I was hoping to find a beta swap on here, and your story sounds right up my alley. I just posted about my manuscript this morning, above, but I have an 85,000-word historical fantasy/fairytale retelling that I'd love to get critiqued. It's set in the French Alps in the mid-1800s and is a retelling of the Greek myth of Cupid and Psyche. For some reason I'm having trouble sending PMs - I don't know if it's my network security settings or people's privacy settings, or what, but let me know if you'd be interested and hopefully we could figure out a way to get in touch and exchange manuscripts ...

Flanderso
12-21-2018, 12:36 PM
Hi Audrey

Sorry for the late reply. Unfortunately, I don't have the time to do a critique swap as I have already swapped with two other people. Your MS does sound intriguing though. I am sorry I won't have any time for it.

Thanks for replying anyway

Phil