NYC Private Elementary Schools - 3rd/4th Grade

ayesha said:

Hello,
The first thing I wanted to know was do all schools have a Back-to-School Open House at the beginning of year as well as First and Third Quarterly Parent-Teacher Conferences? How many Parent-Teacher Conferences per school year are common at 3rd/4th Grade level?

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What do you mean by NYC? There's a difference between Manhattan and like Staten Island schools.

If you're talking about private schools, there's no 'all.'

Back-to-school open house I guess some might -- in my personal experience, no. Schools have open houses for prospective students, but like, why would they have them every year? You already go there.

Parent-teacher conferences are scheduled when they're scheduled -- some schools have like, one overall thing, and one one-on-one scheduled and then you can obviously schedule time if you need it, or email or call the teachers.

Also, can somebody please explain the difference between PTA and parent-teacher conference?

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The PTA is generally a group of parents who arrange fund-raisers and whatnot. Parent-teacher conferences are for the parents to discuss their kid with their kid's teacher(s).

Second, what sort of sports do schools offer at this level?

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Sports? Very few. Some schools, depending on which or where might have like, a soccer team, but it's not usual, especially for lower kids. Most schools have some sort of phys ed.

Are after school clubs or game practices common?

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There are clubs, but not, again, usually in 3rd grade, though there's stuff like chess team someone might be on, so that'd have practices or meetings. There are usually after school things -- theatre, music (that can be in-school too), band, chorus, etc., that kids can take part in.

Do parents chaperon after-school games?

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I'm not sure what you mean. Most kids who play sports don't play on school teams, because there aren't that many schools with teams, and the ones that do have teams aren't usually good teams, and are for older kids. Some schools do have some teams and are good -- I know of kids who wrestled from mid-elementary through h.s. and who fenced (those kids went to public school, though I believe they played private school kids), and some who play lacrosse in h.s. but not in elementary.

What about overnight Fall or Summer trips? (My research has told me that these vary from district from district but there are schools that go for two to four night educational trips.)

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You asked about private schools, so districts have nothing to do with this. Some schools go on little trips, some do overnights in the museum or something, some don't.

I know things vary from school to school but I just need a generic picture for an NYC private school. The US education system is very different from the one in my country so I'm a little confused.

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They vary greatly. GREATLY. You're talking about private schools in, I'm going to guess, Manhattan. They range too, but they've got stuff in common. They may not have quarters or grades like you're thinking, especially in lower school. They're not running by schedules like a public school, nor are they all on the same schedule. I can't tell you how many families I know and have known that can't go on vacation because kid A is in this school that has break from here to there, but kid B is in that school that has break from there to here. Happens all the time.

If you could be more specific... because you're not asking about the education system, you're asking about NYC private schools.

Some are -- some are closer... Why are you moving the school exactly? I mean there are plenty of kids from Long Island in schools on the Upper East Side and some kids from the UES in schools on LI, usually if they couldn't get into anything better?

What are you looking to have? Maybe we can find something close, if you don't want to just invent it.

Well, the best schools are on the Upper East and Upper West -- and in the Bronx.

Where do they travel for work?

Depends on the people. There are very rich people in Manhattan, and in Brooklyn, and on LI, and in Westchester, but depends on the people. What kind of old money? What do they do? If you want to put people in the burbs, you're more likely looking at Westchester, but you could do LI, but it is a slog into the city, and it's LI. Certainly rich folks in the Hamptons, but few full-time and most have places in the city as well. Why LI exactly? Like, is there a reason you chose that instead of Westchester?

What is it you're looking for out of the school? We can probably suggest schools that are close to it.

That's not where I'd go, but it depends on your family. Lots of PW is pretty normal. There are rich people by the water, but it's not like someone says they live in Amagansett and you get that they're rich.

It's like 45 minutes on the train to the city, then more time to get downtown from PW so that's not bad, but it'd be more for a school uptown (well, depending where), which is still doable but getting a bit odder -- if they're super monied, you'd think they'd have a place in the city and use some LI house on weekends.

I agree with cornflake - if they're very rich and Manhattan is where they work and the kids go to school, they're likely to have a (very nice) apartment in Manhattan where they live during the week, & go to the house on the Island weekends & summer. Rich people hate commuting as much as the rest of us, & have ways to avoid it most of us only wish we had!

The one really rich family I know in the area has a lovely big apartment on Central Park West which is their main residence, a lovely big weekend & holiday house in Greenwich CT (which the husband sometimes also uses during the week because he works in Stamford), and a brand new lovely big summer house in the Hamptons which doesn't get used much during the school year. The kids all went to private day schools on the UES in Manhattan for K-8, & the older 2 moved on to private boarding schools in CT for high school (youngest not there yet).

ayesha said:

We chose LI for the history. The family - owners of an international conglomerate - are connected via marriage to one of the old families. The majority of the story takes place on the estate that's been passed on in the family and they continue to live there (Sands Point/Port Washington maybe?). But the issue is travel to the city for work (Downtown) and a school that is popular enough for at least two generations of the family to have attended. We are still on the conceptual part and trying to figure out the logistics. If such a setting can be possible in another neighborhood in NY, we can easily change it now. The family and estate is the main deal, old buried secrets and all.

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Oh, also -- is a rich family that's been there for generations possible in a neighbourhood? Sure. There are very rich families on the Upper east, west, downtown... If you want them in the city, just put them in the city. Port Washington isn't particularly rich, isn't *that* old, etc. It's got its history, so if you want like, they were old shipping-based or -adjacent industrialists who have some water estate they're reluctant to give up, that works, but I'd choose it for a particular purpose, especially because it doesn't immediately bring money to mind -- not just if you want someplace to plop a rich NY family. That, you have options.

As above, you can have them have some family estate there but they'd likely live in the city mostly. Or, you can stick them in Westchester, CT, Manhattan...

Prior Manhattan (and current Nassau county) resident weighing in .

There are some very wealthy neighborhoods on Long Island--Muttontown, Upper Brookville, Sands Point. My children's local school district had a surprisingly large number of Muttontown residents who probably could have easily afforded private schools, but who opted for public. With that said, my son has a friend whose brother commutes to Regis in Manhattan (he's the only one I know who actually opted out of public school to attend private in NYC, although I'm sure there are others).

Re: Manhattan, there are tons of (expensive!) apartment options on the Upper East and Upper West sides. Lower Manhattan is pricey as well (I'm thinking of certain areas in Tribeca and Soho). I don't know anything about any particular private school first hand (kids all went public) but there's some schools that are very well known (Dalton, Calhoun, Trinity, Ethical Culture...).

ayesha said:

Thank you. That really helps. Looks like my choices are down to UES and Westchester. But I've heard many horror stories of commuting to Manhattan from Westchester. Unless there are any Westchester waterfront neighborhoods within easy commute to the city?

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Does it need to be waterfront?

Lots of Westchester isn't that bad a commute; train is likely like 30-45 minutes, depending on where.

Cornflake's right about the commute from Westchester into Manhattan--I think Metro North offers a pretty straight shot from most neighborhoods.

If you're choosing Westchester, how about Horace Mann in the Bronx for the school?

Or Fieldston, or Riverdale.. I prefer Fieldston, personally.

You can also go the other way and go up btw, but depends on what kind of school you want, and partially sex -- like a lot of Westchester kids go Sacred Heart Greenwich, instead of into the city, but depends.

ayesha said:

Not necessarily waterfront no, that's the ideal situation but I can compromise there. The commute has to be Midtown or Lower Manhattan, the business district - I can make it whichever is easier.
Is driving from Westchester a nightmare? I've heard it is.
@hester. Yes, Horace Mann and Dalton are my two most favorite choices.
Thank you for the help once again.

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Yeah, driving can be, depending. Why are they driving? Midtown east is easiest from Westchester, because you wouldn't change trains -- except if you're hellbent on driving, then it's a massive pain in the ass from Westchester.

Why Dalton? Does your kid do a lot of cocaine?

@Ayesha, I can't speak directly to driving into NYC from Westchester, but driving into Manhattan is (almost) never easy. Tons of traffic, road closures, bridge and tunnel construction (breaks out in cold sweat just thinking about it ).

Cornflake, is Fieldston affiliated with Ethical Culture? My aunt used to teach at Ethical . (Sorry for the derail, btw!)

Driving to/from Westchester in rush hour is horrible. So is driving from anywhere on Long Island, or anywhere in New Jersey. If you're determined to drive you just have to accept it and deal. Parking in Manhattan is also horrible, and very expensive. Commuters who have a choice generally take public transportation. MetroNorth trains from Westchester all go to Grand Central, which is on E 42nd St and convenient to a lot of midtown businesses. Subway downtown to the Financial district would add an extra 20-30 min to the trip. From Long Island, the LIRR runs into Penn Station, which is one of the gates of hell. (Literally: due to urgent track repairs, this summer has been announced as the Summer of Hell for Long Island & New Jersey commuters.)

There's quite a bit of nice waterfront real estate in Westchester, either on Long Island Sound or on the Hudson River. Here are some current luxury listings to give you an idea of the geography.

If you still like Port Washington, here's a 2013 NYT article about it that may be useful if you haven't seen it already.

hester said:

Cornflake, is Fieldston affiliated with Ethical Culture? My aunt used to teach at Ethical . (Sorry for the derail, btw!)

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It's kind of the same deal -- I assume you mean EC on the west side -- they're both campuses. I don't remember if they segregate specifically; I've known kids who go to both campuses and I think they're at one or the other but can do stuff at the other, like Fordham, though there could be lower at one and etc.

Wait, an estate? How do you mean that? I mean a family might own a brownstone. Estate implies land to me.

Yes, but they're not there now, heh. You put an estate in either of those places, people will have a hard time with it.