Do you personalize your query letter in the beginning, or at the end?

I put personal and house-keeping stuff after the paragraph(s) about the plot. The one exception was I had one agent refer me to someone at another agency at one point and I mentioned that upfront. But the rest of the time it was always "Dear <AgentName>, Main Character is....blahblahblah."

I always started with:

Dear X,

I am seeking representation for ....complete at X words

Main character is a...

Then any personal bit after that.

Wherever it fits, I guess. I had a request for a full from the Donald Mass agency where I put the personal bit after the hooky bit and after the technical bit (book contains X number of words) just because it made sense to put it there. You're not going to be rejected for not writing the query in the 'correct' order.

I tend to do it at the beginning at the moment, but only because I reckon their time is so limited, if they understand that I'm querying them because I think they might be a good fit... they might read on. I don't think it actually matters, if it's a story they are really keen on, they'll want to read it.

However, Janet Reid, the QueryShark, always wants story up front and motivation below.

I do it after the hook. I mean, obviously addressed to the agent/editor you're querying and then the hook and then after that any extra bits to explain why you think your book is a good fit for them personally.

Aggy B. said:

I put personal and house-keeping stuff after the paragraph(s) about the plot. The one exception was I had one agent refer me to someone at another agency at one point and I mentioned that upfront. But the rest of the time it was always "Dear <AgentName>, Main Character is....blahblahblah."

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Same here. If I have any kind of referral (another author, or if we met in person), I make that my first line (very briefly). If not, I put any other personal stuff at the end.

goddessofgliese said:

I was always told to start your query with a hook, but then I read a few successful query letters and they all started with personalization (such as you represent such or your praised whatever). So I am not sure anymore.

TIA.

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If you have direct personalization, you should lead with it. These might include referral from an existing client, previous discussions with the agent at a conference, or a "favorited" pitch on social media. Even previous email correspondence, such as an agent asking to see more of your work, would warrant leading with personalization.

If it's more general personalization, such as mentions of their web page, an interview, or social media post, it probably makes the most sense to include it in the bookkeeping section of the query.

Ditto Aggy, Carrie, and mpack. If I have something specific to personalize with (a referral, an MSWL tweet, they requested my last manuscript and asked me to send future work, etc), I lead with it. If not, I just keep everything in the final paragraph of housekeeping.

Up until now I was putting it at the beginning - but after reading this maybe I'll switch it up