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I'm not particularly good at interpreting people's behavior, so I'm looking for help analyzing an awkward situation.
Background: I've been seeing this guy, let's call him Alec, for a couple weeks. Some friends of mine are having a party, and I got the green light from them to bring Alec as my guest. I've met tons of his friends, but this will be the first time he meets mine.
Alec and I work completely opposite schedules, so he's basically up all night, every night. He appears to be making a point of telling me what he's does after work, presumably so I won't think he's occupying himself with hookers and blow (He works in that part of town, so both are readily available). I didn't ask him to, for lack of a better word, report in, but I do appreciate that he recognizes it as a potential source of insecurity, especially as I'm fresh out of a relationship where my ex WAS, in fact, cheating on me.
So last night he went out after work and apparently made a new friend (He's one of those people who makes friends everywhere he goes, which is one of the things I love about him). They hung out all night, and here's where things took an awkward turn.
He asked if he could bring this super-awesome dude, whom he just met last night, along with us to my friends' party.
So, there are a few ways to interpret this:
1) He thinks its THAT kind of party, where any and all comers are welcome. I didn't really clarify which type of party this was beyond "costume party" (It's actually a relatively intimate gathering of their good friends).
2) He knows I'll probably say no, and this is his way of subtly telling me, "I was out all night, but I'm not hiding who I was with."
3) He's just that friendly and outgoing.
4) He's just that socially clueless
5) He's high.
6) He's probing to see how I'll respond (after all, it's a new relationship for him, too).
7) He's nervous about meeting my friends and wants someone "in his corner" so to speak.
8) Other?
After typing this out, I'm definitely going to say "no." If it were my party, it would be a totally different situation, but I'm 100% not comfortable with inviting someone I've never even met into someone else's home. Heck, I'm paranoid about inviting people into MY home. A bad experience years ago has given me a permanent tendancy to hide where I live (long story). I'm guessing Alec will be cool with that answer. I'm just trying to figure out what it says about him/us that he suggested it in the first place.
Background: I've been seeing this guy, let's call him Alec, for a couple weeks. Some friends of mine are having a party, and I got the green light from them to bring Alec as my guest. I've met tons of his friends, but this will be the first time he meets mine.
Alec and I work completely opposite schedules, so he's basically up all night, every night. He appears to be making a point of telling me what he's does after work, presumably so I won't think he's occupying himself with hookers and blow (He works in that part of town, so both are readily available). I didn't ask him to, for lack of a better word, report in, but I do appreciate that he recognizes it as a potential source of insecurity, especially as I'm fresh out of a relationship where my ex WAS, in fact, cheating on me.
So last night he went out after work and apparently made a new friend (He's one of those people who makes friends everywhere he goes, which is one of the things I love about him). They hung out all night, and here's where things took an awkward turn.
He asked if he could bring this super-awesome dude, whom he just met last night, along with us to my friends' party.
So, there are a few ways to interpret this:
1) He thinks its THAT kind of party, where any and all comers are welcome. I didn't really clarify which type of party this was beyond "costume party" (It's actually a relatively intimate gathering of their good friends).
2) He knows I'll probably say no, and this is his way of subtly telling me, "I was out all night, but I'm not hiding who I was with."
3) He's just that friendly and outgoing.
4) He's just that socially clueless
5) He's high.
6) He's probing to see how I'll respond (after all, it's a new relationship for him, too).
7) He's nervous about meeting my friends and wants someone "in his corner" so to speak.
8) Other?
After typing this out, I'm definitely going to say "no." If it were my party, it would be a totally different situation, but I'm 100% not comfortable with inviting someone I've never even met into someone else's home. Heck, I'm paranoid about inviting people into MY home. A bad experience years ago has given me a permanent tendancy to hide where I live (long story). I'm guessing Alec will be cool with that answer. I'm just trying to figure out what it says about him/us that he suggested it in the first place.
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