here it is for the non blog clicky peeps:
MUSE
Sometimes you meet a person who inspires you; there may be no significant reason other than they strike a spark in you. It is unexplainable.
They make you want to be better at your craft, they stir a desire in you that will push you to create, this desire pushes you with the need to exceed in your art.
The artists curse is one of passion, of drive, of desire to express them self and to share that passion…
A muse did nothing to deserve their position but it is theirs all the same.
A muse need not even know they are a muse, they just need to exist
I am a painter, a writer, a lover and player of music, passionate about everything I do and subject to my vices.
I sometimes misdirect my passion, my mind never stops running and I need to escape.
I place my focus in many directions and I am always creating, I cannot stop to sit and think I cannot stop and dwell…I must keep moving or dull my mind to numb the pain that is never enough, never good enough, I am never good enough.
My soul is tortured, my work will never be good enough but I will try to get it right, until it kills me
My muse may never know why or understand how he became my muse, it is unexplainable.
He will never know the long hours that he stirs inside of my mind and soul driving me to create, driving me to express my passions in any way that I can.
He will never know why I wake in the middle of the night and see his face and his spark, his energy flows through me and puts the drive in me, I crave the creation within because he exists and that is the only way to explain it.
It is love but not the love a typical person experiences, it is love of creation, the love of passion, the love of the fires within that are stoked by the mere thought of my muse.
I can never express my passions in any other way then through my art with my muse, and so I must create, I must destroy, I must I MUST CREATE!
I feel things hard, I feel them deep…I can feel this desire in my bones and deeper…
I can feel the punctures of desire in the recesses of my very soul, that soul which is invisible and unknown to many…
I know my soul; I can feel it every time every time my muse enters my mind sending my desires up in flames…
I can taste it, I can feel it, I can hear it… I dip into my soul when I am near my muse and it sets my entire being into frenzy…my brain is on fire and creating is the calming water
My muse is not set in stone and changes periodically; it must change as I am ever changing.
I crave change, new adventures and experiences, it fuels my creative energies.
Always learning something new, doing something new… it must be the way…I must keep stoking the fires lest they die
For now you are my muse and I can only thank you by being the best I can be at my craft
Just being inspired by your existence is hard for some people to understand, but not the artists… we all know but we do not know the how or the why
Every time we make a connection with someone it serves some purpose, maybe many … but for me right now, in this moment your purpose is driving me to create, it has placed such a desire in me that I cannot rest, not until I have created what was meant to be created…
You will never know you are my muse but you are
Thank you.
