Thanks so much guys, you have given me a lot to think about and a good direction to go in!
It's going to depend on where your foreign person is from - a native French speaker will sound different struggling with English than a native Mandarin speaker will, for example.
What is this person's native language? The syntax of the native language might affect how they parse English sentences. For example, a French or Spanish speaker might say "I have 20 years" for "I am 20 years old."
I should have said, (and apologies I did not) that my setting is a fantasy world. If I was to parallel it to this world he would be from a South American tribe, coming to London etc. I never considered the impact of a person's native tongue on how they would learn to speak English. Makes total sense now that it was pointed out to me.
Yes, it's all dependent on their original language, and can be subtle. Things like prepositions are often confusing to people speaking a new language. Plurals can be complex, or simply a case of "one sheep, two sheep." Vocabulary is probably the easiest for people to learn, irregular grammar the hardest.
That’s good to know, I will need to brush up on my own grammar first, better to know the rules on how things work so I can know where I can break them.
Ditto the above - you need to determine the native language, then look at the syntax and patterns of that language.
Depending on how "broken" you want the English - it can be a simple matter of a few mixed up words, or barely understandable phrases.
An adult who has been learning a language, but is not yet fluent, will make syntactical errors, but may also struggle expressing complex thoughts - combining the simple structures they have learned, with more complex thoughts expressed in single words, short phrases, or native language frustration.
It's a delicate balance to avoid falling into stereotype and/or offensive caricature. Try to avoid letting the language difficulty define the character, or make them seem less intelligent.
When I was writing characters who were essentially an isolated tribal society with limited knowledge of English, I turned to recorded or transcribed interviews with existing tribal populations so I could see and hear the actual patterns of their speech and how they handled English.
I love the suggestion of reading interviews, listening to them speak, I must look it up. The last thing I want to do is make him appear less intelligent and I can see how it could easily come across that way. I more want to convey that he is a foreigner, out of place.
I'm Norwegian, English is my second language. Unfortunately I can not help you as much as a foreign speaker may do, I have spoken English for over 30 years- I have some idea of the errors a Norwegian would do (my family did them when they visited me in the UK). But "broken English" is a bit of a cliche...and depending on where the person talking it comes from, it can be offensive if you conform to stereotypes.
What you have to do is decide where your E2L* speaker is from. I am Norwegian, and have experience with Swedish and Danish. I also learned German and French at school. That's five languages that will give five answers to your question. -And that is before taking the English language proficiency level of the individual into account-
*English as Second Language
Thanks, that’s a great help. I agree with you that the broken English is a bit of a cliché and can come across in bad taste sometimes. Its exactly what I am trying to avoid.
It's all in the ear. Either you have an ear for language or you don't. This is something you can develop, but usually it will turn out pretty clunky if your ear's not in tune.
The only way I know of to "force" it is to find someone with the accent you want (say in a film) and listen to their voice repeatedly, especially when you're editing that dialogue.
I think that’s part of the problem, I do not have an ear for languages which is why I am struggling in finding his voice. I do like your idea of listening to a film while I am going over his dialogue. I think that could work well.
I agree that the thing to research is how your particular characters would speak. (Unless, of course, you're just interested in how the language evolves, apart from your story needs).
Also, I'd say get it right, but then only show a touch of it. A word difference or sentence structure difference here and there gets the point across. Writing it all out exactly as it would be spoken gets very tedious to read. For those who don't know, that was the style a hundred years ago but these days it's frowned on.
I totally agree with you there. When I first wrote his dialogue, it was in a very badly structured English. And when I read it back, it even confused me to understand what he was saying. I just want to give the slight impression that English is not his first language, that he is not from here.
As a side note, I would love to know how languages evolve, it has become a fascination of mine recently.
Word choice, not "phonetic" spelling (please, dear God, not that). Example from a work of mine own, involving a Swedish immigrant woman in frontier 19th-century America, confronted by strangers in the night, and holding a rifle on them:
A dozen or so halting, crouching steps forward, and a tableau emerged in the gloom. It involved a figure cloaked in a dark, hooded garment, holding a rifle that wavered from pointing at something to my right to pointing at me. The figure said something I couldn’t make out, but it was, indeed, the voice of a woman. I held my hands up as high as I could manage.
At which moment Dan Jack stepped into plain view from behind a what appeared to be a fence to the right.
“My lady,” he said. “Do you speak English?”
"I speak the English much good,” she said. But she didn’t lower that rifle.
caw
I love your example, it is just what I am trying to achieve. Also I most definitely want to stay away from the “phonetic” spelling. I find it might work in small amounts but I am not skilled enough yet to decide when and where to use that.
You can also look at "ending sounds" that are appended to words which don't have them. For example, "No-la" or "of course-la"would be a very Cantonese or Singaporean way of saying (friendly tone): "You gotta be kidding, of course not!" or "Of course; why do you ask?!"
Variations might be an unintended "thank you you" or "please please".
Additionally, you might consider demonstrating concepts like time, e.g., "In the xxxx year, xxxx month, xxxx day" or "In the [country], [province], [state], [city], [borough], [district], etc."
Perhaps most telling however, is the addition of "s" to nouns or other words which do not require the letter for singular or plural. And a confusion of when to apply which pronoun -- this is particularly useful for those languages which do not contain gender-specific oral pronouns. The reverse is that of a language with distinctive pronouns, in which case, you could end up with a sentence like, "This is he saddle that her put on his horse for it."
I wouldn't say "broken English", per se; but perhaps "confused English" would be an alternative?
Thanks, that really helps. I was unsure if “broken English” was the best way to phrase my question. I went back and forward between that and “Bad English”. I do like “confused English” a lot better.
