Please help me find a mentor or coach.

Well, you chose the right place for your question. There are many people here at AW who might be willing to look at your writing and make suggestions. Some members volunteer to be beta readers, i.e., read your work-in-progress--your WIP--and give opinions. Others are looking for a writing buddy, or someone with whom you could exchange writing, commenting on each other's work.

Please beware of people you find on the Web who want money to "coach" you. I'm not saying there aren't any good such people out there, but at your stage--you describe yourself as a novice--there is a serious danger that you will be wasting your money.

Since you are new here, maybe you don't know about the many opportunities AW offers its members. There is, for example, the Share Your Work forum, where you can post portions of your work and invite others to comment. (You need 50 posts on AW before you can post your own work in that forum, but you can log in and comment on others' work right now). You will find helpful comments and discussions on many of the other forums and sub-forums as well.

Good luck!

Before you spend money, I have this recommendation for you. There's a brilliant thread in the Novels forum on AW called "Learn Writing With Uncle Jim." Try working your way through his advice and exercises and see if that isn't immensely helpful for your writing. Good luck.

SiennaBloom said:

I am having a terrible time finding a coach or mentor. I am a novice writer working on a romance novel that is not erotica. However there will be sex scenes as appropriate to the story. I live in a rural area where there is no writer's group and I consistently tell the coaching services this when I write to them.

So far this has been my experience:

• I write asking for a coach, they respond asking for a sample which I provide immediately, they then write back saying the sample shows I'm not ready for an editor. I had put “coaching” in the subject line of every email as well as in the body of the email and they can't see the word coaching verses editing?
• I write asking for a coach and if I get a reply where they ask for payment up front to give me a sample of what they can do for me. I pay them as requested and send the sample. They write back saying I should take their on-line classes with no sample of their coaching help and say the payment I sent is nonrefundable. (I did get the refund in the end but this was a con artist.)
• I write asking for coaching and they offer to give me a free sample of what they can do for me and I get a reply that says I should read books or join a writer's group. They never actually provide a sample of what they can do but they tell me to contact them if I want coaching. (When I asked for coaching to begin with.)
• I write asking for coaching and they want around $400 a month paid in advance and tell me that they will structure my time and give me accountability on a weekly basis. I do not want that kind of service and I tell them this when I first write to them. I am careful to say this whenever their advertisement says things like “I tailor services to meet your needs and this includes writing coaching and accountability.”
• I write asking for coaching explaining that I can't join a writer's group and they reply that I should join a writer's group.

I have been told repeatedly not to give up on my writing and that my synopses shows very good potential. I get vague remarks that some of the sample is good.

Beta readers have given completely conflicting feedback: your work is too slow, you are rushing for example. I think a coach is a better direction for me.

All I want is to find a coach or mentor who is willing to help me improve my writing. I know this can't be free and people's time is valuable. I just don't want to pay for what I don't want. I have a lot of debts and don't have $400 a month. But I am willing to pay for someone's time to help me even if the process takes longer.

I have no more patience to handle a reply that tells me to read a book or join a writer's group.

If you know of someone please either post or send me a private message. Thank you.

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So here's the thing - I'm not sure what you mean by coach, and I'm not positive other people you ask that of would be either.

That's not to say that there aren't, obviously, charlatans and people who aren't helpful out there. However, writing coach means different things to different people, and it's impossible to know what someone means without specifics. Some people might mean someone to hold them accountable and enforce deadlines, someone else might mean someone to act as a personal, go-to editor.

I don't know what you need help with, or feel you need help with - plotting, development, grammar, dialogue, publishing knowledge, etc., etc.

All that said, AW is a good resource for pretty much all of it. You may find one person to pair up with, but the best way to do that is usually to hang out around the forums, post in areas that interest you, comment in threads, critique people's work, ask for critiques on your own (once you've got 50 posts), and get to know people. You'll find people you click with, as in any community. Then you'll likely get a much better response if you ask for personal help, and you may find yourself an online writing group - there are a bunch kicking around.

There's a yearly contest that's coming up. It's called pitch wars and you can find out about it here: http://www.brenda-drake.com/pitch-wars/ . The prize is that you get to work with a mentor to polish your manuscript.

My personal suggestion for what's worked for me (I'm also rural, with no writing group in sight):

Start going to the SYW boards and giving out critiques. You don't need any minimum post count to do this, and don't feel awkward about it. Everybody can see your post count, and they'll be nice to you. Just approach the thing as a reader, and tell the OP (original poster) what works and doesn't work for you. This will do several things.

-Your critiquing skills will improve. By getting distance, looking at other people's work instead of your own, you start to see what does and doesn't work, and you can then apply this to your own writing.

-It gets your post count up so that you can post your own stuff in SYW as well.

-It builds good will in the AW community. Once you've been critting, people will recognize you, and if you post a beta ad, you're far more likely to get a positive response.


Critiques and beta work have helped me grow a great deal as a writer. It doesn't cost anything but time. And hopefully, you can use the stuff you're learning to polish your pitch wars submission, which is also free, and possibly land a mentor that way.

It's not quick, and it's not easy, but it's a lot more of a safe bet than plunking down money for someone to help you. Scammers abound. You may indeed hire an editor if you're going to self-publish, but you should learn how to do most of the editing for story (which includes pacing) on your own.

I hope some of this helps.

Hang out in the Share Your Work forums every day. Especially offer opinions on other people's work. In time, you will acquire friends.

I agree with the advice to spend some time critiquing. It's so valuable: critiquing others' work really helps you see what's wrong with your own. Do as much of it as you can, don't worry about whether you're getting things right or not, and your writing skills will improve at a rate of knots. And then, when you have fifty posts or more you can post an excerpt of your own work for critique, and you'll have lots of friends here who will offer you their opinions on your work.

Good luck.

I agree about reading the Uncle Jim thread. But I'll still send you a PM for if you want it more personalized.

SiennaBloom said:

Thanks everyone for your kind responses. I really appreciate it. I haven't felt qualified to critique others work but I agree that this might very well give me an excellent learning experience. In my career I often tell people that they will learn more from teaching than anything else.

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Every reader is qualified to tell a writer what does and doesn't work for them. You don't have to give highly technical feedback; it's plenty useful to tell a writer that something confused you or didn't have quite the effect they were going for. If you read, you're qualified to critique.

lizo27 said:

Every reader is qualified to tell a writer what does and doesn't work for them. You don't have to give highly technical feedback; it's plenty useful to tell a writer that something confused you or didn't have quite the effect they were going for. If you read, you're qualified to critique.

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+1

I am rather strongly of the opinion that a person whose feedback consists of telling you *how* to write does you more harm than good.

(FYI - this is the genearal 'you' here...)

A bit about "coaches." I majored in English with my concentration in creative writing. I had many professors, but I only ever connected with one. Writing is such a personal thing, I'm not sure I believe you can discover your strength/style with just anyone. Sure the basics maybe, but when one gets to the truly creative stage, my experience was that with some profs I "got it" and with others it was like listening to a biochem lecture. So finding a self-professed "coach" on the internet is monetarily risky (since, as you've found, anyone can advertise they're an "expert"), potentially detrimental to your process, and it might be someone you just don't connect with.

Besides all of the terrific advice given here so far, if you are writing romance, the #1 thing is read, of course. But you might also consider joining RWA. They are a tremendous resource for romance writers. Their monthly magazine is worth the yearly dues, IMO. Lots of really terrific, accessible articles on writing in there. You could also find classes through them which will be geared toward what you are writing. It's worth a look, anyway.

Last thought...being an active member here really can result in making solid ties with good writers. All of my betas and critique partners are people I've met here. By hanging out in a particular subforum frequently (whichever one appeals to you, it won't matter, but do at least also try to frequent SYW), you can get to know other members' styles, personalities, etc. Don't be afraid to reach out if you feel you've made a connection. I'd be willing to bet you can find a really great mentor/CP around here, especially once you've demonstrated your willingness to reciprocate.

Oh, sorry, last-last thought...try to search out posts by JOB here. JOB is Joanna Bourne, a terrific romance writer, and I have found many of her detailed posts to be incredibly enlightening. She's not the only enlightener (heh, is that even a word?) here, of course, but if you're writing romance, can't hurt to get insight from someone in the same genre.