Tom & Katie & Silent Birth

I wonder what they'll think when the baby comes out screaming?

Is it even physically possible to be totally silent during childbirth if no painkillers are allowed? It sounds like if the kid has any behavioral problems, they can blame that moan let out by mom during childbirth.

(Of course it will all be moot if they split up).

The doctrine also states that newborns cannot be poked or prodded for medical tests or even spoken to for the first seven days of their lives, believing that babies go through so much pain during the birth, they shouldn't have to experience any further discomfort or sensory experience that could return later in life to haunt them.

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0_o

It's amazing how crazy some people are.

-Ally

Peggy said:

Is it even physically possible to be totally silent during childbirth?

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Sure it is. Tom just has to hit Katie over the head with a sledgehammer. Then she'll be silent.

This is actually hilarious and ridiculous and of course scandalous. I don't really care for the two of them, so I'd be pretty much ok with her suffocating during birth and him having a heart attack.

I feel bad for Katie's parents. If the gossip rags are accurate, they have largely been cut out of her life, because they don't approve of her conversion to Scientology.

That's hysterical. In keeping with my midwifery training, I'm all for dimming the lights and turning down the music and having people speak in lowered voices for a birth. (Obviously mom needs to do whatever she needs to do and screaming labor is a reality, but not as guaranteed as ER would like you to think. I never screamed.) It's a kindness to the baby considering it was warm, dark and muffled just a minute ago. But it wasn't silent. I think that would be terrifying for the infant. There was plenty he could hear just a few minutes ago and now, "Holy Crap!! I'm DEAF!"

i'm definitely no fan of scientology but, as far as rituals go, is it really that much crazier than slicing off a baby's foreskin as a loyalty oath to god or sprinkling its head with water to keep the boogeyman away? or facing toward a meteorite five times a day to pray?

Uncircumcised penii do look kinda funky, William....

a bishop in a turtleneck?

Yeah, and circumcised ones look...? There's a reason Sly Stallone calls sex "bumpin' uglies."

sly could very well be referring to himself giving oral with the "bumpin' uglies" thing.

Without a doubt. (I'm really glad I'd swallowed the mouthful of vino before I read that.)

But then again, if Sly could do that, we'd have been spared many a subpar action flick.

But back to Tom and Katie. What is the point of a silent birth?????

Wait, does oral sex negate the necessity of bad action flicks in all our lives?

Only if the star can do it to himself. You'd never get the oaf out of his trailer!

Back to Tim and what'sherface

rhymegirl said:

But back to Tom and Katie. What is the point of a silent birth?????

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in dianetics, hubbard wrote that silence has to be maintained because any words or sounds during childbirth would be imprinted on the child's reactive mind, which he felt would have a negative effect on both mother and child.

And having Tom Cruise for a father won't affect the child negatively?

Is Dianetics worth reading? Even for giggles? Sometimes this stuff can be so off the wall, it's fascinating.

sure, why not?

Because I'm very busy, Mr. Haskins. I hardly have time to even sit here and chat with the likes of you people.

that will all change once you've converted.

AnneMarble said:

I wonder if he'll let the kid jump on the sofa?!

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Hell, he'll probably get the kid a personal sofa-jumping trainer, who will teach the entire family how Beelzelbub, Voldemort, and Micheal Jackson can all be repelled by jumping with the correct number of bounces pi times daily.