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MidnightMuse

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Granted. His name is Pepe, he's wearing a thong, and his boyfriend drove him to your house.

I wish my house wasn't so well insulated that it got hotter in the evening.
 
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Granted - we superinsulate your house. Now, all the offgassing from your carpet, wallcoverings, high pressure laminates, fabric coverings, furnace emissions etc. give you what is commonly known in the industry as a "Sick Building" and you get sick right along with it.

I wish I was having a NY Strip steak and a baked potato for dinner at the Waldorf.
 

Rob-rite

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Granted - but your dinner partner is George W Bush.

I wish the US administration wasn't so intrinsically linked with Israel, thereby allowing them an enormous trump-card in solving the middle-east problem.
 
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ewwwwwww do i HAVE TO?

Granted - you and everybody else wishes the US wasnt so intrinsically linked with the BUSH family and the rest of the damn oil barons who are bleeding us dry and leading us into WW3 at the same time. Personally, in the last election I voted Brazilian. I personally believe the only good bush is NO bush. LOL
 
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Oh yeah, I got so worked up over that one LOL ...

I wish the Dems led by Hillary Rodham Clinton and Al Gore would kick some republican a$$ in midterm elections, leading the way to a landslide in 08 that sends Bush and his cronies running back to Texas with their tails between their legs. How's that?
 

janetbellinger

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Done but Hil decides to institute mandatory orthodontics for the whole American public.

I wish that I would actually get some writing done today.
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. Unfortunately all you can manage is "I wish I could get some writing done" five thousand times, over and over again.

I wish someone would wash my car.
 

Jaycinth

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Granted. The drag queens from the nail salon come over and wash your car. They use nailpolish remover and files.

I wish that my car were not under the control of the minions of hell.
 

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Granted but we thought by your word and dark deeds that you were the queen from hell-of course in a very humorous-but not hyperbolic manner

We wish that Jaycinth had a new car so she could concentrate on entertaining us minions
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. Poof! She has a brand new, black Jaguar with black leather seats and darkened windows, and she's having SO much fun driving around town, picking up hot guys and dumping them when they touch the car, she forgets to entertain us.

I wish I wasn't at work right now and didn't have to DO it !
 

Jaycinth

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Granted! You're driving around with me in my Jag. I've got to stop and consult with my Beta on a short story, but my personal assistant, Paulo..( Why yes, he is not only a sexy, latino model for the cover of romance novels, but he is also hetero and told me to ask you to drive around with him. HAve the car back by six-thirty.

Oh. Open the windows. He loves beans but doesn't digest them well.

I wish they would stop glue-ing hotdogs to the equipment at the kiddie playground.
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. Now they're glue-ing hotdogs to the equipment in your office. Oh, and the AC is broken down, and the temps should top out around 110F today. Got mustard?

I wish I'd purchased that life-sized cardboard cutout of Johnny Depp when I was at the mall yesterday.
 

Jaycinth

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Granted! And a life sized Johnny Depp has delivered it to your door. You are thrilled for approximately 2 days until he not only refuses to let go of the 'Jack Sparrow' persona he's had since he arrived, but also refuses to bathe.

I wish I understood the financial components of this data sheet well enough so that I could find...somewhere among the 10 pages of long repetitive columns of numbers...so I could find where the 37 cents is missing from!!!!!!
AARRRRRUUUUGHHHHHH!!!!!!!
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. It's in the couch cushions, silly. Well, 32 cents of it. I think 'Cindy' took the other 5 cents.

I wish it was Tuesday and my rocks were ready to leave stage 3 grit and go into polish !
 

Jaycinth

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Granted! You do realize that they were garnents and not rubies?

I wish someone would make me a ( shut up...shut up I KNOW what I want!!) a GRILLED STEAK AND CHEESE on a TOASTED BUN..with katsup, just a tad of mayo and NO DAM ONIONS!!!!! not greenpeppers or other junk either.....
And YES I do wish for fries with that and 4 fingers of Drambuie....
 
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Granted - we have arranged a special trip to Mexico where a lady named 500 pound lady with a mustache named Consuelo will be happy to teach you. Make sure you take along plenty of kaopectate and don't forget your passport. You do want to get back in the country, right?

I wish the mechanic would hurry up fixing my damn car.
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. He hurried up and fixed it good! Fixed your little red wagon, too. Which is a good thing because your car exploded on the drive home from the mechanic's shop and now that little red wagon is all you have to commute in.

I wish the personalized license plate I wanted for MY little red wagon wasn't already taken.
 

davids

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Granted but we will have to give the telly to the sally so we wont be tempted to fantasize about the Buffys in the buff

I wish that Public Television in my area would not have to run Carls Junior ads