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alleycat

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Granted. But it's one of the earlier forms . . . a block of ice and a fan.

I wish I had time to read all the books I've bought lately.
 

A. Hamilton

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granted..you soon become laid up with a lame leg and laid off from your job, plenty of reading time.

i wish my kitchen had more cupboards.
 

poetinahat

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Granted. The doors are giant replicas of SPAM cans. You lose your appetite every time you go in the kitchen.

I wish hotel bellhops still wore those great pillbox hats and short jackets with gold-braid epaulets.
 

alleycat

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Granted. I'll get you tickets to a gay bar.

I wish I knew what "special needs" was yakking about half the time.
 

A. Hamilton

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ohhhh what a delicious wish-granted! you now have a 24/7 psychic link connecting you to her deepest thoughts. every single thought all day long. careful what you ask for. (no offense sn :) )

i wish i could keep my electric bill down.
 

alleycat

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Granted. Let me just unplug a few of those energy sucking appliances . . . the blow dryer, the fridge, the washing machine and dryer, the oven, the TV, the stereo, and the computer. There you go. Well, I guess you can't read it now.

I wish I had one of those people who do all your errands for you.
 

Jaycinth

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Granted. You have 'Cindy'. But she's got the flu, halitosis, and is so scared of vampires she bathes in garlic oil daily.

I wish the polar-bear's habitat wasn't disentegrating.
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. Welcome to the next ice age. Please be careful ice fishing and watch out for bears on the trek back to the igloo. If you see something move, throw 'Cindy' down and run.

I wish my cat hadn't pulled down the curtain after being frightened by the blender, leaving me standing in my kitchen nekkid with a now uncurtained window between me and fresh clothing. It was unfortunate. :D
 

davids

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Granted but it is a nice photo-thanks

I wish Jaycinth many episcopalian suppositories
 

Jaycinth

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Granted! I donated them to a local Church, chosen at random.
The new Episcopalian sponsored clinic on wheels will be pulling up to your house any moment now. The Dr. on duty used to be a Romanian weight-lifter during the cold war and has yet to stop using steroids.

Don't worry you'll be regular in a few days.
We'll be praying for you.

I wish the haters would stop massacareing trees, and I wish you would also excuse my spelling.
 

MidnightMuse

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Granted. Only I'm not sure if they're masticating trees, massacring trees, or putting mascara all over the trees :D

I wish I liked cooking.
 

alleycat

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Granted. You're going to try the recipe Susie got published in the Sun and enjoy cooking from now on.

I wish my cat wasn't over here fighting with me. (Her favorite sport.)
 

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Granted it is not cancelled-is shamus o cranachan the famous Irish Dylan Thomas clone still attending-if so I wanna be there

We wish we could write poetry with a Welsh accent and while doing it drink like Mr. Thomas
 

alleycat

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Granted. But you have to unload the truck. And you have to agree to watch that Mariah Carry Pepsi commercial every day for a year.

I wish they hadn't change all the light bulbs in my office. It's like we have two suns now. I hope I typed that correctly. It's hard to see the computer screen.
 

Jaycinth

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Granted. They removed all the lightbulbs in your office and relocated your building to a planet with two suns.

Hey, at least they threw in a pay-raise to cover your commute!

I wish more psychos were posting controversial nonsense that I could pretend to take slight umbrage at, today.
 

alleycat

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Granted. One psycho coming up. I'll start a thread suggesting that everyone JUST write prologues and forget the rest of the book.

I wish I was getting more done this morning. Stop the e-mails and phone calls already!
 
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Granted -- but due to a technical error, all posts fro psychos go directly to your e mail along with an unusually high volume of spam from mortgage companies, viagra companies and other assorted annoying companies ... and you have to personally answer them ALL by midnight or your computer will turn into a pumpkin ...

I wish I had a date for Saturday night ...
 

alleycat

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Granted. I'll pick you up at . . . well, it might be Sunday morning before I get there. Can we go see Superman?

I wish my friend would tell me whether we're meeting for lunch today or not.
 

Jaycinth

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Granted!
Saddam, your new friend from the Yekta Persian deli down the street is taking you out for Gyros, kumquats and a bottle of sour date wine.

He thinks your nose hair is sexy.

I wish I did not have to maintain either sane or adult behavior while dealing with rude consultants.
 

davids

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Granted-get a nice publishing deal and we will all watch the video-eat Yak stew-and sing cuuuumbaya while we sit around the campfire hating you for getting a great deal

We like Jaycinth wish there were a lot more psychos around to join us in making fun of ourselves
 
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Granted - From now on however, you will be meeting with all the other psychos from your new room in the asylum ... Congratulations - John Hinkley needs a new room mate ... You can help him impress Jodie Foster ... You get to watch Flightplan with him every night for a month too...

I wish I had a black American Express Card ...
 
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MidnightMuse

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Granted. But the NAACP has protested that it should be called the African American Express Card, so the "black" one has been recalled and is worthless now.

I wish I could speak Dolphin.