Dammit, cray, stop messing with AW's hamsters

It was cray did it! That little battery! Wow.

Fortunately the hamster stable had spares, but it took a hell of a long time to round enough of them up and then we had to sober them up because it was a hamster national holiday and most of them were drunk out of their gourds.

YEAH!

He's been cross-training in their wheel again, yeah?

That post frightens me, but you're looking good in those cool shades, Haggis!

THANK ALL THATS GOOD, AW IS BACK!!!!!

damn hamsters...

Yes, Cray, we know the name is very misleading, but we swear, there is no ham inside a hamster. Please leave the poor creatures be.

Haggis said:

As I understand it, he was running left while they were running right.

That's the scientific explanation anyhow.

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*pays double to contract teh Cleaner...blood and guts are so hard to get out of servers*

Cray no



Not the hammies.

Haggis said:

Lisa's damn good, but cray's getting annoying, you know?

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Lisa is a rock star.


I'm still not sure the Go, Cray! campaigns are in the best taste...

And here I was blaming Bing. {don't think too much about it, I can always blame Bing.}

Glad hammies are okay.

Lisa makes everything better.

Haggis said:

You caught it on video! See, people? See? There's proof. Damned if I know how they made a battery look like a hamster, though.

Lisa is, indeed, a rock star. And Go, cray! campaigns are never in good taste.

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I got it all. I got everything.

Lisa is such a rock star, she's outrageous, truly, truly, truly outrageous.

Oh cray. The red box is the hamster chow. The blue box is the high-efficiency laundry detergent. Thank goodness Lisa knows how to pump hamster tummies.

I saw him do it!

Cray did it once

^this.

Haggis already went to great lengths to keep us informed of the scientific explanations in #6 and accordingly I reckon as often as not it's sufficient.

But for those more technologically challenged as me meself personally here is a short passage explaining why it is not cost effective (nor reliable) for the AW upper echelons to rely on the hamster powered technology currently employed by the servers providing the undoubted benefits to their users who hopelessly try to connect to them.






Shamelessly borrowed from the Internet:

I was doing some research on this when I came across this page that explains that 1 hamster on an exercise wheel would make about 1 milliampere. So it'd take about 1000 hamsters running at full speed to light a 100 watt light bulb which requires about 1 ampere to light up.

So we take this into the equation and we take 1 server lets just say we're running a 230 watt computer as a server. 1000 hamsters to every 100 watts, 2300 hamsters minimum to run a server for a very brief period of time assuming every hamster is doing their job and running on their wheels.

Seeing as we can't run a server -a decent one at least- with constant shut offs and turn ons we'd need a lot more hamsters seeing as every hamster needs a break between 'shifts' I suppose you can say. So lets say that every hamster was somehow trained to take shifts and continuously run throughout their shift without stopping. You'd need at least 3 shifts, morning, afternoon and night. That's 6900 Hamsters minimum (2300 x 3).

Each hamster would cost about $1-$5 USD each (pricing varies by location, breed and age.). We'll just go with $5 USD for each so that'll cost us around $34,500 USD before taxes of course. Now we add the cost of food, we'll just use this equation of 1 5lbs bag of Kaytee Forti-Diet for every 5 hamsters so 1 pound per hamster which would cost around $10,474.20 USD before taxes. The general recommended amount to feed a hamster daily is 2 tablespoons of the feed then any left overs must be thrown out so every 1lb will last approximately 16 days so you'll have to buy 1380 new bags every 16 days. Rounding down to 15 days per 1lb you'll be spending around $20,948.40 USD before taxes every month on food alone. As for water, I can't give out an exact number as costs vary from place to place.

Well I would go into bedding and housing costs but I think you get the picture without putting those into the equation. Well seeing as a well taken care of hamster can live anywhere from 4-7 years we'll just add up the costs of how much you'll be spending on food alone over a period of 7 years. So lets see... 7 years = 84 months multiply $20,948.40 by 84 so the total cost being... A grand total of $1,759,665.60 USD every 7 year ($251,380.80 USD a year.). So unless you got some extra "pocket change" laying around, a hamster powered server isn't as economically logical as previously thought.

One is better off getting a fancy server and a fancy ISP for a fraction of the price every year that uses electricity from an outlet which is provided to them by their Electric company -and doesn't use hamsters for electricity-. Though the idea of hamsters running in wheels all day just to power a server is rather cute though.

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