20 Jokes Only Intellectuals Will Understand

I didn't get number 12. And 3 of them weren't funny. But the rest made me at least smile with a few laughs.

#12 - Oct 31 means base 8 = 3*8^1 + 1*8^0 = 25 (in Decimal)

Some of them are cute - thanks PD

Aaaah! Thank you. I thought it might be a maths joke.

17, 18, and 19 don't count because I already heard them from a number of non-intellectuals.



But I wouldn't have gotten 12 either, so thanks for the explanation.

Cute list!

Didn't quite get the 5 but loved the 4... Others were funny too, but not as much

arcan said:

Didn't quite get the 5 but loved the 4... Others were funny too, but not as much

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Nerd version of Joke Number 5, following a detailed description of what it's based on.

Kylabelle said:

Nerd version of Joke Number 5, following a detailed description of what it's based on.

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The part I don't get is the "practical purpose" one...
I did get the other nerd ones though. Does that make me an intellectual geek?
But as I usually also get stupid neandertal jokes, am I an stupid intellectual or a neandertal nerd?

I didn't get 19 and 12. RA explained 12. Would someone explain 19 to me? --s6

Number 19 - to be a programmer you have to be attentive to fine detail and very literal minded because computers need very specific instructions.

So read the wife's request again without any assumptions of what she means. Just a literal reading of it.

arcan said:

The part I don't get is the "practical purpose" one...

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It's the difference between a thinker and a doer.........

raburrell said:

#12 - Oct 31 means base 8 = 3*8^1 + 1*8^0 = 25 (in Decimal)

Some of them are cute - thanks PD

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Not sure about the others, but that one is many decades old. I vaguely recall seeing it in the late 1970s, perhaps in Creative Computing magazine.

That's what I get for being both an intellectual and an old fart.

The Satre joke has been around for a while as well. I think they are all old jokes that have been gathered together.

I do know one physics joke that I've never found the meaning of:

Did you hear about the black hole that was put in an indesctructible dustbin?
It took off.

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mirandashell said:

It's the difference between a thinker and a doer.........

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I must be a doer then (although I'm an engineer who likes mathematics too...)

I heard the Sartre one in college when that existential bastard was making my life miserable. There was one about Nietzche that was pretty funny but I can't remember it. All I can dredge up is the one about the man with a very tiny head who had found a magical mermaid while walking on the beach one day.

Someone should start an old joke thread. Not me, I only remember the bad ones--s6

The logicians ones I didn't get. Everything else, I got. A few I had heard before.

Sets the bar low for 'intellectual'...

Most of these were groaners, though I did get a couple good chuckles

Great
Now I have indigestion.
I hope you're pleased with yourself.

Funny stuff.

My late mother was quite gifted with the ability to speak foreign languages and was reasonably fluent in speaking Latin. In her day, some schools taught it and she picked it up rather easily. She always used jokes #6 and #7.

No one ever got it.

I get them.

I think I laughed once.

I feel like when my son tells me "the most hilarious thing" he saw on YouTube. I stare at him blankly waiting for the hilarious bit to begin, and he starts to explain it to me. And it's even less funny after that.

I like the one about the Roman dude ordering beer. Not quite a "knee slapper", but worth one of these:

The other jokes are way too "Sheldon Cooper-ish" for me. Although I'll bet Sheldon has never heard of Noam Chomsky.

I got them all! (Although some only barely.) Whoo-hoo -- I am so smart -- S-M-R-T! D'oh, wait...

I had heard the one about Einstein, Newton, and Pascal before.