Somebody did it somewhere...

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

Or else it wouldn't be on the instructions...

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion.) . LOL

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!) ... LOL

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after
heating."
(...and you thought????...) .. LOL

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on
body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time?) .lmfao

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or
operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and... I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use
only."
(as opposed to...what?)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash) lol

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) LOL

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your
hands or genitals."
(..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

JoeEkaitis · Mar 13, 2006

And on every Preparation H product:

FOR EXTERNAL USE ONLY

"I ate a whole tube of this stuff and it didn't stop the burning and itching at all, Doc!"

Pennywise · Mar 13, 2006

Ha Ha very funny.

I think most of these warnings are to protect the company from lawsuits though. I mean, in todays society, people will sue anyone for anything and usually get away with it to!! :rant:

I remember a woman in America successfully sueing McDonalds because her coffee was hot!!

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

Yes, and now all the coffee cups say "Caution: Contents are HOT!"

I work for a marketing company, and this is what they say - if it sounds stupid, but is listed on the directions, someone somewhere tried it.

stormie · Mar 13, 2006

Fools are born every minute. Thanks for the laugh, Christine! That--and coffee--just made my morning.

dahmnait · Mar 13, 2006

Christine N. said:
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash) lol

Ok, this is from memory, but I got such a kick reading it the other day.

On a can of mixed nuts: "may be processed on equipment that also processes nuts" (ya think?)

Maryn · Mar 13, 2006

The McDonald's Burn Case

Pennywise said:
Ha Ha very funny.

I think most of these warnings are to protect the company from lawsuits though. I mean, in todays society, people will sue anyone for anything and usually get away with it to!!

I remember a woman in America successfully sueing McDonalds because her coffee was hot!!

The McDonald's case comes up so often, usually as an example of a silly, frivolous lawsuit, that I saved an article about it. It's not my work, so I won't post it here, but I'll summarize.

The woman who was burned when she spilled her coffee on her lap spent a week in the hospital with second- and third-degree (the most serious) burns to her genitalia and buttocks. After three weeks recuperation at home, she returned to the hospital for extensive skin grafts. Her weight had dropped to 83 pounds. Her clitoris was burned off. Her vaginal opening and anus were badly burned, and her anus healed with strictures which made defecation painful.

The woman wrote to ask McDonald’s to do two things: keep their coffee cooler and pay her medical expenses. McDonald's offered her less than half her expenses, no apology, and no reduction in temperature on their coffee.

Most people don't realize ithe serious injury this woman received--and that McDonald's had over 700 burn complaints over a ten-year period and had decided not to reduce the heat settings on all its coffee equipment because paying off each burn victim was cheaper. That's where punitive damages come in.

Maryn, who would miss her genitalia if Mickey D's burned them off

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

Yes, I would be mad about that too... Then again, I probably wouldn't travel with HOT coffee in my lap either. I think (though I may be wrong) that she had it in her lap? Or was it that she was just holding it and the lid wasn't on tight? Hey, if you're driving you shouldn't be drinking - not even coffee. Stop first.

AdamH · Mar 13, 2006

At first, I thought that the Macdonald's suit was frivolous until I found out all the details like Maryn did. But how's this as a frivolous lawsuit:

Kelloggs, the friendly makers of Frosted Flakes, are suing Exxon over the use of a tiger mascot saying that both companies having a tiger as a mascot causes confusion to consumers.

It's a crazy crazy world out there....the only people that get hurt in a case like this is poor poor Tony the Tiger and Exxon's Tiger...and the children...it hurts the children too. *sniff*

ChaosTitan · Mar 13, 2006

Christine is right, she had the coffee cup in her lap, between her legs. Let's all say it together: cupholders are our friends. :Headbang:

To add to the list of stupid labels, I once bought a curling iron (I forget the brand). It came with a little slip of paper that said "Do Not Use on Eyes." :Wha:

rtilryarms · Mar 13, 2006

//On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how??...)//

Easy, wash your face first and your bottom last- just like the person before you.

//On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."//

The same instructions are on my Wife!

//On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."//

The ultimate warning. They cover their butt while they cover your lap.

//On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after
heating."//

Darned honeymoons! Don’t worry, it cools off (see defrost instructions above)

//On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on
body."//

Except above the shins. That’s the iron knee of the whole thing.

//On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."//

Why don’t they call it drowsy aid?

//On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use
only."//

LOL!

//On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your
hands or genitals."//

Those crazy Swedes think that they can do anything better than the rest of the world. It took me 2 times to stop my Chinese-made chainsaw.

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

That's what I thought, which is why I think everyone thought the lawsuit was frivolous. If you're gonna travel with coffee in your lap, expect to get burned. Come on, not that hard to understand. It was an avoidable incident.

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

chaostitan said:
To add to the list of stupid labels, I once bought a curling iron (I forget the brand). It came with a little slip of paper that said "Do Not Use on Eyes."

I've seen hairdryers that say "Do not use in tub." And vaccuum cleaners that say "Do not use to vaccuum hanging drapes."

Silly Rabbits.

Chacounne · Mar 13, 2006

About the coffee lawsuit,

I believe her son or grandson was driving and had pulled over and parked when they got their order, and she had the cup between her legs to steady it while she was eating or adjusting her food. If that is so, and please correct me if I am misremembering, why was what she did wrong? Burns are one thing, in my opinion, third degree burns that require skin grafting is another.

Just my two cents,
Chac

Celia Cyanide · Mar 13, 2006

chaostitan said:
Christine is right, she had the coffee cup in her lap, between her legs. Let's all say it together: cupholders are our friends.

Actually, another little known fact about the lawsuit was that she was sitting in a parked car at the time the coffee spilled, and she was in the passenger seat.

If you drive with a cup between your legs, it's obviously going to spill. But even if someone should expect this to happen, they should NOT expect to be in the hospital for 3 weeks with 3rd degree burns. If the coffee gave her 3rd degree burns, it was too hot to drink. If it was too hot to drink, it should not be handed to a customer. It's unsafe.

I don't know the exact temperature, but McDonald's keeps their coffee heated at temperatures much higher than is the norm for restaurants. They do not want their coffee to cool off, and then have to make more, so they serve it at temperatures high enough to give people 3rd degree burns.

Lastly, if you receive 3rd degree burns because of the actions of a major corporation, you have every right to expect them to pay your hospital bill. McDonald's makes enough money to do that for a little old lady, and they didn't.

Maryn · Mar 13, 2006

chaostitan said:
Christine is right, she had the coffee cup in her lap, between her legs. Let's all say it together: cupholders are our friends.

The car was parked. It was a Ford Probe with a slanted dashboard and no cup holders. The injured woman had asked that the driver pull into a parking space so she could add cream and sugar without spilling.

Maryn, big facts fan

Prosthetic Foreheads · Mar 13, 2006

Celia Cyanide said:
If it was too hot to drink, it should not be handed to a customer. It's unsafe.

In my experience, all coffee is WAY too hot to drink immediately after brewing. I don't know, maybe McDonald's heats their coffee even more after brewing and if that's the case, that's different. But you can't say, "If it's too hot to drink it shouldn't be handed to a customer."

All coffee drinkers I know want their coffee as fresh as possible. They would love to watch the last drip of hot water (and water used for brewing is SCALDING) right as their coffee is prepared. Like i said, it's different if they heat it more after brewing, but in every restaurant I have worked, the fresh brewed coffee is going to cause serious burns if enough of it is spilled on you, and that's how the customers want it. They want to have blow on it before they drink it. If they can drink it immediately when you serve it, they'll complain that it's not fresh enough.

Anya Smith · Mar 13, 2006

Somebody did it somewhere

Christine, thanks for the laugh. It's hard to believe there are so many stupid people in the world to do those things.

Christine N. · Mar 13, 2006

Oh, ok, I thought she was driving. Yes, coffee shouldn't be that hot, I agree, but I would never stick a cup of hot coffee between my legs in a moving vehicle. I'd put it between by feet first. Hey, at least if the coffee spilled there I could move my feet pretty quick.

That's just asking for trouble. If everything else was in a bag, food on the floor, coffee in hands or on the floor. I'm not saying McD's shouldn't have paid her bills, I'm saying that people should use their heads too.

Prosthetic Foreheads · Mar 13, 2006

And coffee should be served too hot to drink.

trumancoyote · Mar 13, 2006

Maryn said:
Her clitoris was burned off.

Honey bunches of Christ, that's awful >.<

But like, didn't that weird skin-flappy Star Trek door-like hood thing protect it?

... I know very little about female genitalia, if it's not obvious.

Stew21 · Mar 13, 2006

trumancoyote said:
Honey bunches of Christ, that's awful >.<

But like, didn't that weird skin-flappy Star Trek door-like hood thing protect it?

... I know very little about female genitalia, if it's not obvious.

Oh my Lord! I can't stop laughing at this Tru....
(no the burn isnt funny, his question wording is)

No that "skin flappy Hood" is not enough to protect her clit from anything but overstimulation...

Trish - who can't believe she just said that!

Carole · Mar 13, 2006

Christine N. said:
That's what I thought, which is why I think everyone thought the lawsuit was frivolous. If you're gonna travel with coffee in your lap, expect to get burned. Come on, not that hard to understand. It was an avoidable incident.

When this case came up in one of my paralegal classes, the book described that the cup was styrofoam and that the coffee melted through the cup. Not unavoidable.

Celia Cyanide · Mar 13, 2006

Prosthetic Foreheads said:
In my experience, all coffee is WAY too hot to drink immediately after brewing. I don't know, maybe McDonald's heats their coffee even more after brewing and if that's the case, that's different. But you can't say, "If it's too hot to drink it shouldn't be handed to a customer."

All coffee drinkers I know want their coffee as fresh as possible. They would love to watch the last drip of hot water (and water used for brewing is SCALDING) right as their coffee is prepared. Like i said, it's different if they heat it more after brewing, but in every restaurant I have worked, the fresh brewed coffee is going to cause serious burns if enough of it is spilled on you, and that's how the customers want it. They want to have blow on it before they drink it. If they can drink it immediately when you serve it, they'll complain that it's not fresh enough.

Why should coffee be served hot enough to cause 3rd degree burns? Do most restaurants have over 700 burn victims from their coffee? The temperature of McDonald's coffee is much higher than that of other restaurants.

And the point is, McDonald's coffee is NOT fresh. They keep it that hot so that it can sit there all day, and they don't have to toss it out and make more.

Maybe this incident could have been avoided if she had not spilled it, but she was a little old lady with a hospital bill. Would it have killed McDonald's to pay it? No. She wasn't try to cash in, just get her billed paid.

Truman, PM me and I'll explain everything!

kikazaru · Mar 13, 2006

I doubt that anyone's personal coffee makers makes coffee hot enough to cause 3rd degree burns. Perking it on the stove would do so because it is heated to boiling and sustained for several minutes, but when it runs thru an electric drip coffee maker it doesn't reach boiling temperature, and these are what restaurant makers usually do. Combine the fact that the coffee was hot enough to severely burn someone to that extent, and then placed in a flimsy paper cup really should make them liable for damages.

That poor woman.

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