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DiaryOfASinner
11-04-2013, 11:39 PM
Hi everyone,

I'm new to the forums, but I sent off my query letter to Larsen Pomada Literary Agency a couple of months ago, and they requested a full manuscript, which I also sent off, and then roughly 5-6 weeks later, I got the personalized email posted below. My question is: do you guys think this is a legitimate request to resend once I have made revisions? or do you think the agent is just being courteous?

Dear Jay

I have completed the review of your manuscript, and regret to inform you that we will not be able to represent it at this time.

I really loved your concept; however I found that I wasn't quite as emotionally invested in the story as I could have been. Showing more of Adrian's emotional state through his actions, rather than through the narration, may help to get the reader more involved.

This manuscript has a lot of potential! If you'd like to resubmit it after some additional editing and rewriting, please feel free.

Thank you for your submission.

Cheers,

Lynn Brown
Assistant Agent

zanzjan
11-05-2013, 12:00 AM
I don't have any experience with that particular agency, but in general, a rewrite/resubmit request is a good thing.

Also, welcome to AW :)

Old Hack
11-05-2013, 01:12 AM
If they weren't interested in seeing it again after you'd reworked it, they wouldn't have asked you to revise and resubmit.

This is a genuine request. It has nothing to do with courtesy.

andiwrite
11-05-2013, 02:21 AM
What reason would she have to say this to you if she didn't mean it? This is awesome feedback, I'd say. Congratulations! You're a lot farther than many of us just based on the fact that an agent asked to see your story.

Siri Kirpal
11-05-2013, 04:25 AM
Sat Nam! (literally "Truth Name"--a Sikh greeting)

Yep, that's a genuine Revise and Resubmit.

Blessings,

Siri Kirpal

DiaryOfASinner
11-05-2013, 12:01 PM
Thank you everyone for your feedback. I appreciate it!

I guess the hard part for me is trying to figure out whether the changes I make should be small (like implied in the letter) mostly narration converted to action, or if I should go the distance and change enough of it to make for a good (second) read.

For some reason, I think reading the same book back to back with little change might be boring for the agent. But then again, if I change too much, it might lose value in their eyes. It's so hard! lol

Old Hack
11-05-2013, 04:08 PM
Don't make changes just so that the agent isn't bored with reading it a second time. Make changes that you think would make it a better read.

If the agent suggested some changes, only make them if you agree with them. If you don't, but you can see the problems the agent's suggestions were addressing, consider how to resolve those problems in your own way.

DiaryOfASinner
11-05-2013, 07:52 PM
Don't make changes just so that the agent isn't bored with reading it a second time. Make changes that you think would make it a better read.

If the agent suggested some changes, only make them if you agree with them. If you don't, but you can see the problems the agent's suggestions were addressing, consider how to resolve those problems in your own way.

Thanks you, you're right. I guess I just thought if an agent was really that taken by my work, they'd sign me and then help me make any necessary changes. But I guess they have a lot to consider. They don't want to make any recommendations if they think the author isn't willing to make those changes.

Debbie V
11-05-2013, 11:24 PM
Dear Jay

Showing more of Adrian's emotional state through his actions, rather than through the narration, may help to get the reader more involved.

Cheers,

Lynn Brown
Assistant Agent

This sounds like the very sort of revision I've been working on. There's a good article on getting deeper into POV here: http://www.martinisandmanuscripts.com/deeppov/

Good luck with the revision. Keep us posted.

DiaryOfASinner
11-06-2013, 01:19 AM
This sounds like the very sort of revision I've been working on. There's a good article on getting deeper into POV here: http://www.martinisandmanuscripts.com/deeppov/

Good luck with the revision. Keep us posted.

Thanks Debbie, I will :)

owlion
11-06-2013, 02:52 PM
This happened to me a while back and I actually decided to re-write the whole story to make the prose flow better (it went from first person present tense to first person past and I learnt about these things called prepositions which I realised I over-used). It's still a work in progress months later, but I'm almost ready to resubmit.

I guess what I'm trying to say is don't re-submit too early, because it's unlikely you'll be asked to re-submit that same story again after your next try. (But do be pleased and go at your work with new enthusiasm :))

DiaryOfASinner
11-07-2013, 01:52 AM
This happened to me a while back and I actually decided to re-write the whole story to make the prose flow better (it went from first person present tense to first person past and I learnt about these things called prepositions which I realised I over-used). It's still a work in progress months later, but I'm almost ready to resubmit.

I guess what I'm trying to say is don't re-submit too early, because it's unlikely you'll be asked to re-submit that same story again after your next try. (But do be pleased and go at your work with new enthusiasm :))

Thanks Laurie, thats good advice. I tend to rush things myself, but I really have to slow it down for this request.